"I don't know which one of you is shaking the worst," Dad laughed, walking into the kitchen on August 27th, or as I called it Hell Day. Today was the day that I started school again at Trenton High. Emma was, for once, the only calm person in the house. Andrew was flipping out about what he was going to wear and trying to figure out where all his classes were. I was flipping out trying to figure out how I could remain invisible through the whole year. So far neither of us had succeeded in our goals.
"You know we're allowed to wear tanktops to school, right?" Emma asked. She threw her bare legs up on the table. I looked down at the tee shirt and shorts I wore.
"There's nothing wrong with what I'm wearing," I muttered. My mom put a hand on my shoulder and glared at my sister.
"I wish more girls would dress like Izzy, I'm tired of seeing so much skin," Mom defended me. Dad grunted and nodded.
"We should get going," Emma said. Andrew and I quickly stood up. My hands shook uncontrollably at my sides. Upstairs Jack began to cry as he woke up. I moved toward the door, but Mom stopped me.
"Don't worry about it honey, I'll get him." She said.
"But--" I whispered. I was starting to seriously regret wanting to back to school, but I couldn't back down, or Megan would kill me. She was already mad enough at me that I'd spent my summer working at Dawson rather than hanging out with her. Ryder and I had yet to make peace, and that was driving her insane. She was constantly inviting me to hang out together and try to make things the way they used to be, but I wasn't sure if seeing Ryder would make me happy or sad.
As Jack's cries grew louder another reason sprouted up in my mind. I didn't want to leave Jack alone all day. At almost seven months old Jack had mastered sitting up on his own. He knew his name and everyone who came to our house regularly. He was as curious as ever and was constantly trying to eat and play with things he shouldn't. He was starting to understand when I told him no, too. I was afraid that the moment I walked out of the house he'd start speaking, even though I knew it was to early for that.
"I promise I'll take a thousand pictures and video tape every cute thing he does," Mom laughed.
"Can I just--"
"No, Izzy, we're leaving." Emma snapped. She grabbed my arm and drug me out of the kitchen.
"Emma, let go of me," I demanded, scratching at her wrist. She ignored me and pulled me out of the house and threw me into the car. Andrew was already in the backseat, waiting for us.
"Will both of you stop worrying? It's school, you've done it before." Emma grumbled as she pulled out of the driveway.
"This is high school," Andrew argued. "You know, the place where freshman get eaten?"
"No one eats freshman, they're too chewy." Emma smirked. She looked over at me and said, "Well? What's your excuse?"
"I don't want people to know I'm related to you," I mumbled. Emma scowled and looked back at the road.
"You two are seriously horrible,"
****
My stomach was in knots as I marched up the front stairs of Trenton High School. The stone tigers were still posed to strike on the steps and the doors still stuck when you pulled on them. Nothing at Trenton seemed to change like I thought it would have. My fears were realized as Andrew, Emma, and I stepped into the foyer and the crowd of students fell quiet. Curious eyes stared at us, scanning us from head to toe. Andrew shuffled nervously beside me, then bolted toward the freshman wing. Emma saw one of her friends and left me standing alone in the middle of the silent room.
"Hi," I whispered, awkwardly waving. No one made a move to say hello back.
"Izzy!" I had never been so relieved to hear Megan scream my name in my life. She shoved her way to the front of the crowd and wrapped her arms around me. My feet left the ground as she squeezed the air from my lungs.
"You bitch, I should drop you like a rock for getting a job. But I won't. You know why? Because I love you," Megan sang. She threw her arm over my shoulder and whirled around to face the students.
"Guys, I know she's sexy, but come on." Megan smirked. She was like Moses parting the red sea. The students disappeared, that is all except one. Ryder McCoy stood, staring at the ground, in the middle of the foyer.
He looked up through his hair with an innocent look, which for Ryder was a miracle. His chin began to wobble and he cried out, "Are you my mother?" I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my lips. Ryder grinned. He ran to where Megan and I stood and wrapped his arms around my waist. He picked me up and spun me around.
"I missed you so freaking much," he said, as he put me down. I smiled up at him.
"I missed you too Ryder, the next time I decide to do something stupid like that, hit me." I laughed. Ryder shook his head and laughed.
"I could never hit you Izzy," he said. I looked at him, afraid that he was about to get all mushy. "Because you'd hit me back, and we both know how bad that would hurt."
The homeroom warning bell chimed and I sighed. So much for a happy reunion. "I have to see Mr. Drew before homeroom, I'll see you guys later ok?" I said. Megan and Ryder nodded. They moved off down the hall, whispering to each other.
I went in the opposite direction, stopping at Mr. Drew's door and knocking.
"Come in!" Mr. Drew shouted from the other side. I opened the door and smiled weakly at the man behind the desk. Jace always said that Mr. Drew reminded him of a pudgy Voldemort. He was bald at thirty-five and had a nose that looked like it'd been smashed into his face. His eyes were dark and beady.
"Isabella, welcome back! What brings you to my office this morning?" He asked.
"You said you wanted to see me before homeroom," I reminded him. I sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk, it reminded me of sitting in Ben's office. Which reminded me that I had to go and see him after school. I'd cancelled our last four appointments, and Ben wasn't happy.
"Right, of course. I just wanted to let you know that we won't tolerate any bully in this school, so if anyone says anything to you about your situation I want you to come straight to my office." Mr. Drew smiled. I couldn't help but roll my eyes.
"Mr. Drew, I appreciate your concern, but I don't think anyone will say anything. I didn't exactly do this to myself on purpose." I said, standing up. I didn't know what version of events Mr. Drew heard, but it defiantly wasn't the truth.
"Of course not, of course not. I know I asked you this earlier this summer, but do you talk to the child's father?"
"Mr. Drew, I really have to go." I mumbled. I hurried out of his room, forcing myself not to slam the door.
****
Classes the first day of school were a joke. Teachers only took roll then told you the things you shouldn't do and what would happen to you if you did. Every time my name was called during attendance a wave of whispers would rock the room and the teacher would give me that I'm so sorry you're you look. Needless to say, I hated every minute of the first day. My only relief was that I had lunch, that is until Megan broke the news that we didn't have lunch period together.
"Megan, go and get your schedule changed!" I screamed, grabbing her arm. She gave me a sympathetic look and patted my arm.
"Don't worry, everything will be fine. You have plenty of other friends in the school." She said.
"None that I'm super close to," I shrieked. In fact I hadn't talked to anyone this summer besides Megan, Ryder, and Sam.
"Izzy, you'll be fine. Now march your butt into that lunchroom and eat, you're getting to skinny." Megan ordered. I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms.
"I'm stressed, I'm allowed to be skinny," I snapped before turning on my heel and marching into the cafeteria. For once I wasn't the center of attention. I saw Andrew at the end of the line, Sam was a few people ahead of him and Ryder was seated with a group of guys that used to be Jace's friends.
"Izzy, come sit with us," Ryder shouted, waving his arms. I pointed to the lunch line and he nodded. He turned back to his friends and began laughing.
Once out of the lunch line I made my way over to Ryder.
"Hi," I said, sitting beside him. The guys around the table all ducked their heads and pretended to be really interested in their food. Even outspoken pervert David had nothing to say. I glanced over at Ryder, but he didn't seem to notice, he was such a guy.
"So um-- are you going to join the swim team this year again?" One of the boys asked. I was shocked that a question had been directed at me and it didn't involve Mark, Jack, or Jace.
"I don't think so," I answered.
"You should, you were really great Sophomore year," he said.
"I don't really have time for it," I replied, shrugging. Of course I wanted to swim again, but I had to take care of Jack, I wasn't going to pawn him off on my parents everytime I had a practice or swim meet.
"Yeah, I heard this year is going to be insane. We have this new English teacher that gives papers out everyday." One of the other boys said.
"Will you write mine for me?" Ryder asked.
"Yeah right," I laughed, pushing him with my shoulder.
"Hey, if she's going to write your papers I want her to write mine too!" David shouted.
"She's only writing mine because I babysit for her, right?" Ryder inquired.
"I would never let you babysit, Ryder." I sighed.
The conversation dropped off and my hope that I could become the old Izzy faded away.
----
After school I drove over to Ben's office. Barbie doll receptionist was behind the desk secretly texting in her lap. She looked up as I opened the door and hid her phone.
"Hello Izzy, I thought you were gone for good." She laughed. I ignored her and went back into Ben's office. He was sitting in his chair writing on his notepad.
"Hey," I said.
"It's about time you showed up, I was beginning to think you were going to cancel on me again." Ben said. He looked at me with that parental look that was wrong on his young face.
"I'm sorry, I've been busy." I replied. He threw me a candy bar and smirked.
"That's for going back to school," he laughed.
"I only get a candy bar? I spent six hours being tortured and this is all you can give me. I'm beginning to think you don't love me Ben." I muttered.
"Torture huh, it was that bad?"
"Everyone treats me different," I mumbled.
"What do you expect Izzy? I've talked to a lot of the kids at your school, believe it or not. Many of them are having a hard time dealing with what happened to you. It's a scary situation that they feel is now a reality. Anyone of them know it could have been them, but it wasn't. For that they feel guilty and thankful. Do you think any of them want to hurt you anymore than you have been? They're here for you two Izzy, you just have to realize that once you're ok they'll be ok too." Ben explained. I unwrapped the candy bar and put a peice of it into my mouth. I hated when he was right.
"I talked to Ryder today," I told him.
"That's great," Ben congratulated me. "So what was it exactly that had you busy all summer?"
I spent the rest of Ben and I's allotted time telling him about my summer at Dawson, especially the part about Mr. Dawson giving me that check. Once again Ben questioned me about why I was so scared to let Jace know about Jack, but this was the one thing I wasn't going to budge on. Jack was the one good thing that came out of the horrible event and I wasn't going to let the past anywhere near him right now.
*Mark's P.O.V*
I followed her to school that day, watching from a distance as she nervously tugged at her clothes and her hair. I wanted to walk up to her and wrap my arms around her, to make her know that I was alive and that I was here for her. I didn't want anyone in that school to take her away from me, especially that boy she'd been hanging around with. I had to squash that relationship before it even began, but I didn't know how. I couldn't reveal that I was alive, my father had made that very clear. If Izzy or that boy knew I was alive there would be a nation wide man hunt and they would find me, I had no doubt about that.
After school she went to see that damned head doctor. I didn't know why her parents thought that her dreaming about me was a bad thing. I loved that I was the only thing on her mind. I knew I shouldn't have followed her home, but once again I couldn't help it. I had to see her and my son. He was growing up fast.
Izzy climbed out of her car and leaned back in to retrieve her things. She was so perfect. Everything about her was perfect. I wanted to run up to her and sweep her off her feet. I wante to press her against the car and kiss her like there was no tomorrow. I wanted to make her mine again. She stood up to suddenly and whirled toward me. Her face fell and she scrambled backwards, tripping over her own feet. I ducked behind a bush, but the damage was done. She'd seen me.
*Izzy's P.O.V*
"Oh God, please no."