Chapter 5 | Colors
"Let me, O let me bathe my soul in colours; let me swallow the sunset and drink the rainbow."
- Kahlil Gibran
Listen to Set me on Fire by Bella Ferraro
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"I still don't get this. It's literally only the first day of school and my brain already gave up on me. Wow, thanks brain."
The smell of coffee hits me like a wave of refreshment as Ward places the cup on the table I'm currently sitting at. "Thank you." I whisper, careful not to shatter Beth's attempt at concentrating on her understanding her homework. She has her curly fiery hair up in a messy bun, a few strands falling onto her face that she keeps huffing them away but never tucks them behind her ear. Her eyes are trained on the book which lay open on the table, her eyebrows furrowed and her lips pulled up in a scrunch.
Behind her, the scene of the sea and the beach is almost still. The sky a bit clouded, but ever so beautifully so. The waves crash upon the shore softly, and the sun - as much of it that shows, anyways - is skipping slowly to hide behind the horizon of watery heaven.
"A few warm croissants for my dear friends coming from Molly, the lovely boss." Garret announces cheerily as he places a plate full of croissants on the center of the table. "Honey, I love you, but will you please shut up? I'm trying to resolve Einstein's mental illness through letters and numbers, and your voice isn't really helping. Again, I love you." Beth says, an impatient tinge touching her voice. "Yeah, yeah. You love me, I know." Garret replies, sighing as he slumps into his chair next to a grinning Ward, who's sitting right beside me.
"Beth, my absolute love, I'm sorry to interrupt your mission but I need to talk to you all about something." Molly says as she pulls a chair and sits with us. I frown at the sad tone adding to her voice. A slight shiver goes down my spine and I sit up straight to hear what she has to say. "I'm worried that you'll have to quit your jobs at FrostBite. It is better for you to work on your education since this is your last year in high school and you have to do your best to get into the universities you want. It was a great pleasure to work with you. I've had so much fun and positive feedback from customers. You're all beautiful people, but I want you to study first. Please forgive me for saying this so suddenly." Molly says, her eyes sad and her lips pursed in a tight line.
I cannot think of anything, much less do something. My eyes travel to Beth's, and she is staring at her notebook with a blank expression on her face. When I look to Ward, I see that his eyes are teared up. We just got kindly fired from our second home.
"What about volunteering? On Christmas break and Easter?" Garret asks, and even though he does not work here, he still looks like the air has been sucked out of him. "I'd love to have you on the holidays!" Molly exclaims, and then a single tear leaves her eye as she motions for a group hug. We all hurry to the warmth of the hug, bodies colliding with so much yearning and friendliness.
After bidding her goodbye, the four of us walk out of FrostBite with sad smiles and tear-smeared eyes. The wind blows into my face, a bit violent and harsh and cold, and I clutch my arms around my body to keep the frigidity away from my body. Our walk towards our homes is pervaded with absolute silence, the faint, occasional clearing of throats heards hearable every now and then. I let myself think and absorb the scenery surrounding me. The waves of the sea crash heavily and angrily upon the shore, like outrageous screams of the heavens above. It's dark and chilly and lonely, akin to the thunderstorm of emotions destroying our peace of mind. And somehow, everything around me is a match to the chaos outpouring its way in my veins.
This year will be better.
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I can hear the disturbing honks of Beth's car outside, and I can tell she is trying to play a certain beat as she honks, and so I laugh to myself in the early morning and skip to the front door after I bid my grandparents goodbye.
"Good morning, my dearest friend!" Beth greets once I am sat at shotgun. I look at her with a single eyebrow raised, a grin stretching on my face involuntarily. "What got you so cheerful this time, Bethany?" I ask, my voice playful and wondering. "Because, my little sunflower, everyday is a new chance to be productive. A new chance to do more and be more. A new hope and a new plan and a new destination in a whole new yet known world."
I stare at her. She is so much beauty and grace. So much kindness and delicateness. It's like she is made of golden fragments ready to fly and cover the roads with such immense elegance. A huge, refreshing smile is on her lips, and her eyes are twinkling with delight and enjoyment. The red locks of her hair fall around her face effortlessly, framing the soft edges of her face ever so slightly. She is beams of sunlight in the midst of dry, chilly Autumn.
She takes in my smiling face with a grin and starts driving towards school. A song is playing on the radio, but the sound is turned down and it's faint and almost unhearable. "Where did that idea come from?" I finally ask as I turn my head to her from the scene playing outside the car's window. Beth is focused on the road spreading in front of her, currently being the school's road towards the parking lot. "Yesterday's sorrowful event, to be honest." she answers, and her voice is now softly sad and less energetic. A small, almost unnotable frown climbs up my face as I stare at the road disappearing under the car as Beth parks it somewhere near the front of school.
She turns towards me once she takes the keys out of the ignition with a wistful yet hopeful smile. "We have the whole year in front of us. We've got so much time to live, Mabelle, and a lot of places wait for us to visit and a lot more adventures are waiting as well. Yesterday was not the end of our lives. True, we had a whole lot of fun there. So many of our memories lay in FrostBite. But we've got to keep them as good memories as we move on to next place to pile our memories in." she says, and the only thing I can do is envelope her in a tight hug.
"This year will be better." I whisper as we pull away.
She smiles, and I smile too.
This year will be better.
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"As you all know, it's that time of the year again."
No one else but me pays attention to Beth once she chirps up with that sentence. Her hands are clasped together professionally under her chin, her elbows resting on the table. She had pushed her tray of almost-finished food a bit further away from her and sat up straight to announce the usual declaration we all got used to since freshman year.
Once she realizes she has no one's attention, she shoots the two busy boys daggers with her eyes then suddenly bangs her hands on the table just once. The two boys jump in fear and immediately look up at her with eyes of pure horror. Garret swiftly takes out his earphones and drops them on the table, while Ward dumps his phone on the table as well, making a somewhat loud sound of a thud.
A sweet smile stretches on Beth's face as she brings her hands back to their position and bats her eyes innocently. "As you all know, it's that time of the year again." she repeats herself, moving her eyes from one of us to the other. "Ah, yes. Halloween planning, right." Garret says with a smile as he folds his hands and leans into the table. "Exactly. Now, what are you planning to dress up as?" Beth replies, a satisfied grin showing on her face. "Probably Captain Hook." Garret replies with a shrug. "I might go for a vampire look." Ward says, scratching the back of his neck doubtedly. Beth nods understandingly and turns her head towards me expectantly. "Haven't decided yet." I admit, my voice low and almost unhearable. "You have no time to decide! Halloween is, like, a month away!" Beth exclaims, throwing her hands in the air in plaint.
"It's actually more than a month away, meaning that it is more than thirty days away."
We all look up at the sound of Theo's voice. He stands behind me, clutching the strap of his backpack across his torso tightly. He has a nervous smile on his face, and he looks from one of us to the other with uncertain eyes. "Um, can I join?" he finally asks, looking at no one in particular. Everyone at the table shrugs while I stay still, looking into his eyes with no emotion. He cracks a small smile and settles next to Ward, shaking hands with both boys like professionals.
"Hey Porch! What will you be for Halloween?" Beth asks him, her eyebrows shooting up with clear interest. "You cannot be Captain Hook nor a vampire. Just saying." Garret pipes in with a finger pointed in Theo's direction. "I think, maybe Peter Pan?" he replies, his voice questioning and unsure. "Too basic." Beth says with a disapproving shake of her head. Theo nods in agreement, staring at the table awkwardly. "Will you be attending any party for Halloween?" Ward asks him, a single eyebrow cocked up. "Probably. Are people already inviting others to parties?" Theo replies, both of his eyebrows raised up in astonishment. "You don't seem to get how important Halloween is in this town." I say with a chuckle. His mouth forms the shape of an 'o' as the muscles of his shoulders relax.
The bell rings, signaling the end of lunch break, and we all shuffle to get out of the cafeteria as well as the other students. "Hey! Are you free today? Maybe go some clothes shopping or something?" Beth says to me as the five of us walk together. "I've got this assignment to do. Sorry. I promise you to catch up later, okay?" I answer, a slight apologizing frown appearing on my face. "Okay." she replies, shooting me a small, genuine smile.
"Hey Beth! What's your last period today?" Garret calls, sliding his arm around Beth's body and pulling her in as they walk beside me. "Art, you?" she replies casually as she watches students file into their classes. "Same." he answers with a wide grin.
"Funny thing."
My eyes snap to Theo, who walks next to me with his eyes skimming over the hallway aimlessly. "What's so funny?" I ask, my eyebrows slightly furrowing. He gives me a side glance before retreating his sight to the corridor. "I kind of have art, too." he replies with a shrug and a distant smile. "Kind of meaning?" I ask, my confusion deepening at his reply. "Music is what I have for last period. Since it's considered art, I suppose I have the same last period as them for the day." he replies, taking me by surprise. "I have Music, too." I say, my confusion fading into faint amusement. This time he turns his head completely towards me, and I am met with a sincerely amused smile of merriment.
"Then how about I walk you to class?"
"You're literally going there for your own self, Porch."
"Can you just stop being so dispiriting for one once, Lemonade Girl?"
"Using big words and my awful nickname?"
"So you accept it as your nickname!"
"Never said so."
"You make me want to roll myself off a cliff."
"I'd be happy to be the one giving you the push so you can do just that."
A perky laugh leaves his mouth and, once it settles down to a few slight chuckles, he looks at me with such enjoyment. I take in the lines appearing at the outer corners of his eyes and the way their hazel color seems to have gained a glowing twinkle. "You're a good person, Mabelle."
He enters the classroom with a simple smile on his face, and I am struck with the words he said to me, standing right at the door with nothing but a grin slowly breaking onto my face.
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I watch as the leaves rustle outside from the glass window of the library. They lift up and collide softly with one another and then graciously collapse to the garnet of the ground, waiting for the next handful of autumn wind to raise them up to their battle again.
Almost no one is at school anymore. The bell rang about twenty minutes ago, and I had come to the library to meet up with Caspian. He still haven't shown up, so I picked out a book and chose a table which is located next to the window so I can have the perfect quiet time for peacefully reading.
I turn my head back to the book lying open on the table, and start flipping through the pages gently. A strand of my hair falls around my face, distracting and disturbing at the same time. I reach my hand to it and push it to the back in hopes it wouldn't come back to shower down in my sight. As I doubted, that same strand falls loose again and blocks my vision with its soft blonde color.
"I'd say you lift your head up to keep it from falling into your face."
I snap my head up, my eyes looking for the source of the voice, and they are met with the grey pools of Caspian's eyes. His mouth is turned up in a small, amused smile and he's leaning into the rack of books shielding me away from the eyes of entering people with his arms lightly crossed in front of his chest.
I smile and wave my hand at him and tuck that persistent strand behind my ear. He takes my small wave as a cue to come and sit in the seat across from me and he softly drops his backpack onto the table and intertwines his fingers together, placing his elbows on the table for support. "What are you reading?" he asks me, his eyes peering at the book opened at a random page in front of me. "How to Fall in Love by Cecelia Ahern." I answer, slightly blushing at the title of the book I chose to read. "I take it you've never been in love?" he asks, interest evident in his voice as he tilts his head to the side. "Not with people, no." I reply with a shy shrug. "What did you fall in love with, then?" he asks, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise at my answer. "The universe, nature, happiness and tranquility." I say, a gentle smile stretching itself on my lips unconsciously. He gives me a wide smile in satisfaction and nods his head slowly, then unclasps his hands and puts them under the table.
We stay at the table for some more time, probably about fifteen minutes of sudden silent pauses and awkward unneeded smiles, which seemed to be enough for Caspian to sigh in exasperation. "This is not working." he mumbles tiredly. "What are you talking about?" I ask him, tilting my head to the side in confusion. "C'mon," he says as he gets up abruptly, taking me by surprise and not answering my question. "To where, exactly?" I ask him, sitting still in my seat. He sighs and gives me a smile. "If we're going to do this right, we should do it in a fun way," he says, then reaches his hand out for me. "Ready to do some wandering, Reed?" he asks, a grin playing on his mouth excitedly.
I find myself chuckling slightly, taking his hand and ready to leave.
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"So," Caspian starts saying before tasting his own cone of ice cream. We are sitting in a children's playground, specifically on the swings, slightly swaying every now and then with our ice cream cones in our hands. "Why is your favorite color blue?" he continues, looking at me from behind the string of steel holding the plastic seat of the swing he is sat on.
I furrow my eyebrows faintly, thinking of a specific clear reason to answer with. I give my cone of vanilla ice cream a small taste, then look back at him once I swallow the heavenly soft food. I notice that he's watching me with sincere eyes and I smile in his direction at the thoughtless act he's doing. "It was my sister's favorite." I say, feeling the back of my eyes slightly sting. I push the thought of the pain away, deciding to focus on the fun I am determined on having at the moment.
"Was?" he asks, a crease forming between his eyebrows as he furrows them in perplexity. I nod, feeling my bottom lip a bit trembling. "She's away." I say after clearing my throat, looking for bravery and confidence. "Do you two not talk to each other?" he asks, cocking his head to the side once he sees my uneasy posture. "Not on daily basis. Occasionally." I answer, taking a bite off my ice cream and looking down to the earthy ground beneath me.
She loved blue. I remember how happy she'd become whenever she saw summer's vibrant sky, or flowers and clothes in that color. I remember how her room had walls painted in light blue, like the color of the sky during the first days of summer. She had many framed pictures hanging on the wall; of herself in a sundresses at the beach with her feet in the water and a laugh caught in a photograph, of the two of us, of our parents, friends and birthdays and grandparents and ceremonies. She resembled blue. Sometimes it didn't suit her though. Sometimes, blue was her sin.
"Let's get out of here," I say getting up to stretch. "I get tired of staying at one place when we've got a whole town to see." I continue with a gentle smile which I hope doesn't reveal my true motives. All I want to do is shake the thought of her out of my mind, and I cannot do that while sitting on a swing for hours in what Caspian might think is comfortable silence.
"Okay." he says as he gets up, slinging his backpack onto his shoulder as I do the same. We exit the playground in silence, content with hearing the sounds of birds chirping and leaves rattling and the sound of life coursing through the air.
We walk by stores and point at funny looking things and laugh about nonsense every now and then. The feeling is genuine and pleasurable, giving off a vibe of actual living to the fullest while doing the smallest acts of fun like aimlessly walking around a town.
A few hours later, we find ourselves in his car which he stopped right at my house a few minutes ago. We fall into a slightly awkward silence as we stare at the house with the lights turned on and the curtains of the front windows glowing a faint, dull white at eight p.m. I decide to break the silence and look at him, turning my face to him as I ponder over whether or not should I ask him the question on my mind.
"What? Like what you see?" he asks me, a playful smirk tugging at is lips jokingly. I let out an airy laugh and return my eyes to meet his. "What is your favorite color and why?" I ask him with a simple smile and a tipping my head slightly to the side. He looks at me intently, with steady and evaluating grey eyes, making me want to fidget in my seat, but then he cracks a smile - one that surely looks to be hiding the secrets no has ever been told before, and one that eased my uncertain feeling into calming repose.
"Hazel-green. Because it's the most beautiful color I have ever seen on a person." he says, his voice soft and lovely and warm. I nod my head, feeling a small blush threatening to spring onto my cheeks as I watch his eyes watching me. I thank him for the good time we've had and tell him goodbye, then march to the front door and wave goodbye again before I shut the door behind me.
Later that night, I think of colors and smiles and ice cream cones. A grin spreads onto my face, and before I can keep it on for two minutes, I snap myself out of my reverie and change into pajamas, but I never could help the smile I felt creeping to my lips as I fell asleep with colors behind my eyelids.
Hazel-green. Because it's the most beautiful color I have ever seen on a person.
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Hello my lovelies!
It is official: I will be updating on every Saturday by midnight, so stay tuned for a new chapter next week. I might do some surprises and update a day or two earlier than that every now and then.
AND THE WINNER IS:
'So I'm in the middle of exams right now and on Friday I had an ICT exam and I literally had the most useless teacher invigilating over the exam. So I turn the page and I'm already freaking out because well it's an exam and then to make matters worse I'm met by a whole page of maths and I'm so confused (really my ICT teacher is the annoying one for putting a maths question in an ICT exam). So I raise my hand and tell my invigilator I'm confused coz I'm writing ICT and this is a maths question and then he tells me He doesn't even know what ICT is and I've been instructed to answer all questions so I must stop complaining and get on with the exam and then he just walks away and I'm just like?? So I did the question anyway and it wasted my time coz it was so hard and not even related and the fact that my 'invigilator' didn't even know what subject he was invigilating didn't help much.'
This chapter's hashtag will be: #MyWeirdFriend. Let me see your stories :)
Much love,
snowflakesandbubbles <3