Chapter Twenty-Nine
We're young and naive
And you're telling me
That someday we'll run off together
I'm starting to think, I'm stuck in a dream
Because we're young and we don't know better
Now I'm falling happily
Recklessly
Trying not to lose my sensibility
But gravity pulls me into you...
We're just a couple of kids.
-Couple of Kids ; Maggie Lindermann
- - - -
Our story ends just like how it began: with a ball. However, unlike the first one, which sealed the deal of the Hiragi-Ichinose arranged marriage, this one celebrated the finality of it.
The eerie feeling of déjà vu creeped up on Yuu as he entered the ballroom, decorated from floor to ceiling with crystal and diamonds, hand-in-hand with Shinoa, who seemed like she was uncomfortable holding his hand.
Join the club, he thought crossly.
Everyone gathered in the ballroom for the reception began to applaud for the new couple as they made their official entrance to the wedding reception, fake smiles plastered on their faces. Yuu scanned the crowds of people for his parents; they were situated at one of the tables, standing for the couple and applauding like everyone else.
Upon their grand entrance, the party could begin. The castle's musicians began to play a classical tune - a Bach sonata, Yuu recognized - which was the cue for the dancing to begin. Yuu's arm snaked around Shinoa's waist, pulling her towards him into the proper waltz position.
They sashayed around the dance floor, surrounded by other dancing couples. Yuu felt all eyes on him, watching him, judging him, making sure he didn't make a single mistake, but he shook it off and allowed his mind to go blank.
Time seemed to move in fast-motion, and before he knew it, they'd been dancing for hours. The cake had been cut and served, they'd graciously accepted their luxurious housewarming gifts (Yuu now had more candlestick sets and silver utensils than he ever could've wanted), and pleasantly thanked over a hundred guests for attending the reception. It was exhausting to say the least, and Yuu was grateful the party was slowing down with a slower, melodic tune to slow-dance to.
"So," Shinoa started as he twirled her around to the tempo of the music and dipped her to the ground. "Where'd you learn to dance like this? Last time I checked, you were a terrible dancer."
"Hey, I wasn't that bad," Yuu defended himself bemusedly. "I only stepped on your foot a couple times." When all she did was laugh in response, Yuu decided to risk it and answer her second question. "I learned from a friend," He added on quietly.
"That one guy, you mean," Shinoa deadpanned as they twirled between the other couples. The train of Shinoa's wedding gown got in the way, making Yuu question the point of making the dress so long. "Pretty boy. The one you were hooking up with."
"A princess does not say such vulgar terms such as hooking up," Yuu mocked both her and his family by feigning a fake pompous accent. He earned a laugh from Shinoa and a light smack to his shoulder.
"Shut up," She chuckled.
It sunk in that Shinoa had actually brought up Mika, and now there was an awkward silence looming over them, which made Yuu wonder if he should say something to explain himself. Apologize perhaps, give Shinoa some sort of closure.
"Why are you regarding me in such a matter, Yuichiro?" Shinoa questioned, her voice going soft with worry. Judging by the look on her face, Yuu knew she knew exactly why he had that look on his face.
"It's just," Yuu couldn't seem to finish his sentence, the words getting lost in translation somehow, so he opted for the second idea. "I'm sorry."
When Shinoa said nothing, her lips pursed in a tight line, expectantly waiting more than just those two words, Yuu resisted the urge to sigh. So she was going to make him explain it all? Yuu thought with a twinge of irritation. He almost didn't want to tell her everything, knowing her blabbermouth tendencies, but it would feel so liberating to politely rub it in her face.
"It's not like I don't like you, Shinoa," Yuu explained under his breath. "I actually really do." Shinoa seemed to sink down, her previously poised posture releasing as she relaxed. "But not in the way everyone wants me to."
"This whole arranged marriage thing only made me realize how oppressed I've been my entire life," Yuu explained to her, slowly, so she could catch every word. "And meeting Mika allowed me to realize that I have the right to make my own choices."
"Mika," Shinoa repeated, testing the name out. "Finally there is a name to the face."
"I'm sorry," Yuu said again, looking away. It felt weird to hear her say his name, like he was revealing some big secret. Then, he laughed to himself, knowing the secret had long since been revealed.
"It's quite alright, Yuichiro," Shinoa shook her head, allowing Yuu to spin her. Yuu had to go on his tiptoes to be tall enough to her to effortlessly glide underneath him. "I've had some time to think about it. In retrospect, it was quite obvious you never loved me in the first place. I just thought-" She stopped mid-sentence to collect her thoughts. "I thought, maybe, somehow, I would be able to make you change your mind."
"Shinoa-"
"Don't say my name, not like that," Shinoa stopped him, and Yuu felt her fingers clench on his shoulder. Yuu dared to look at her face - she had upset tears in her eyes, threatening to mess up her perfect, wedding-day makeup. Yuu had never seen her look so emotionally vulnerable before; she was always so guarded, never wanting to let anyone in. Yuu saw some of that inside himself; up until the last couple months, he wouldn't allow himself to admit what he really wanted, how much he was struggling on the inside. It sent a pang of guilt through his heart, because he knew Shinoa did love him, whether she wanted to or not, and there was no way for him to reciprocate the feeling.
Everything she had done, it was all just a desperate grasp at straws to get him to stay, because Yuu was slipping further and further out of her grasp, dissolving into nothing right in front of her eyes.
"I get it now. I know there's nothing I can do to change your mind," Shinoa said bitterly. With a short laugh, she added, "Hell, if you could, you'd probably be dead or gone by morning."
Yuu kept his expression neutral, as to not give her any ideas. Luckily, she was staring at the ground now, narrowing her eyes at his shined leather shoes. "I just tried so hard-" She choked up, and she swallowed back the sob that blocked her throat. "I thought my life was supposed to end up this way. Marrying the handsome prince, living happily ever after."
"You'll find your happily ever after, Shinoa," Yuu promised her, and for once, he actually meant it. He leaned in, placing the most delicate of kisses to her jaw, just below a beauty mark on her cheek. She shivered under his touch, biting her lip to refrain from crying. "Just not with me."
The grandfather clock in the ballroom began to chime eleven times; signifying the end of the party. The good majority of the guests had already left home, needing to get to bed early to continue their lives the next day.
That was the inevitable thing about life. Everything was temporary; no matter how permanent each moment felt, eventually people would move on and live the next day their lives, the transient moment becoming nothing more than a happy memory of the past.
Everything is ephemeral, and the story has to end sometime.
Queen Kaori approached the couple, failing to notice the helpless look in Shinoa's eyes and the distant one in Yuu's, smiling in that reserved, queenly way she always did. "Are you two ready?" She greeted them cheerfully.
Shinoa nodded in agreement, having lost the strength to speak aloud, her hands dropping from her grasp on Yuu's shoulders to her sides weakly.
"As I will ever be," Yuu said in response, forcing a smile to show his fake enthusiasm.
Little did she know, he was ready for something else entirely.
"The driver's outside waiting out front for you two," Queen Kaori told them joyously. "All your bags are packed already. I tremendously hope you two enjoy your extravagant honeymoon in the mountains; until we see each other again!"
Yuu allowed her to give him a tight hug, knowing it was just a formality when they parted. He tensed up, waiting for her to let go. She hugged Shinoa too, who had the same reaction. Dotting her eyes with a handkerchief, she waved it as they headed out of the ballroom.
With each step he took, his feet felt more and more like lead, and he was walking through a muddy bog. The front doors of the castle were opened for him and Shinoa by the royal guard, and the cold winter air hit his face. A bleak, thin wind it was, like a dry sour wine, sweeping up the hills, rattling atop the uneven castle rooftops, and weaving agitatedly through the broad-leaved shrubbery.
The automobile was parked out front, just like his mother planned. It was a sleek and shiny model, imported from Europe, the black outer coating practically blending into the night.
Yuu approached the automobile first, his hand on the handle of the backseat. He looked up expectantly at Shinoa, prepared to open the door for her when she shook her head.
"No," She whispered, so softly Yuu almost didn't hear her.
"What?" Yuu asked, his fingers curling around the handle apprehensively.
"I cannot," She turned away. I can not get into that car with you. You and I both know this."
"Shinoa," Yuu started, letting go of the car handle and approaching her. She took a step back, nearly stumbling over the train of her dress.
"No, don't touch me!" She cried.
"We can fix this-"
"No, Yuchiro, we can never fix this," Shinoa interrupted him. "And you know that. So just go, Yuichiro!" Her voice broke, cracking on the word go. "And if you're smart, you'll never come back."
Yuu gulped, eventually nodding. "I suppose this is goodbye, then," He mused. Might as well play along, it works out better this way.
"It is. Goodbye, Yuichiro," Shinoa said, voice devoid of all emotion. Yuu moved towards the car again, turning around to gaze at Shinoa one more time. She stood there, hands clasped in front of her, jaw clenched and eyes looking straight at him. She was trying so hard to hold herself together, to stay strong enough to let him go before she could change her mind. Yuu offered her one last smile, whispering "Thank you, Shinoa."
He could've been imagining it, but he swore he saw the faintest of smiles turn on the corners of her lips. With one last lingering look, Yuu opened the car door, sliding into it and sitting in the passenger seat.
"Good evening," The driver spoke politely, dipping his driver's cap in salutation as Yuu slammed the door behind him. "Where to, sir?"
Yuu couldn't help but break out into the wildest grin he'd ever had.
"Surprise me," He winked.
"Of course, sir," Tugging off the cap, the driver revealed a head of golden blonde curls.
Turning on the ignition, Mika pressed the accelerator pedal and sped off into the night. Swerving down the paved path that led down the castle grounds, he turned to Yuu.
"We did it," Yuu grinned when he realized Mika was looking at him.
"You did it," Mika added, matching Yuu's grin with an expression that held so much emotion Yuu wasn't sure he could pinpoint each one. "Somehow, you pulled it off."
"I thought I was going to crack," Yuu chuckled. "The plan went in a completely different direction than what I expected it to, but I'm glad it did; it turned out better this way."
They then heard sirens in the distance, and sharing a look mixed with shock and amusement, they both began to crack up. "They're already on to us!" Yuu squealed, shifting the car into a higher gear. "Go go go!"
Laughing hysterically, Mika pressed harder on the acceleration and the car lurched forward, throwing them back into the seats.
"Are you ready?" Mika said from the drivers seat, clutching the wheel so tightly his knuckles were white.
"Absolutely," Yuu smiled, and it was the truth. "Let's go find our second chance."
Mika glanced over and saw him staring out the window, a faraway look in his eyes. He was staring at the stars, which were much more visible when they were away from the smog-filled city. Like someone had splattered white paint in the sky, they lit up the path with an ethereal glow.
It was in this moment when the two realized there's nowhere they'd rather be in the world.
"Happy birthday, Yuu-chan," Mika said softly. He wasn't sure why he was whispering; it just felt like something he needed to say in a hushed voice. Frowning, he kept his eyes on the road. "Sorry I couldn't get you anything."
"Are you kidding?" Yuu looked at him incredulously. "This is the best birthday present ever."
Mika saw his excited, almost childish expression and a happy blush rose on his cheeks. Before he could respond, a sly smirk formed on Yuu's mouth. "Also, keep your eyes on the road," Yuu teased, blushing as well. "I mean, I know I'm attractive and all, but stating at my face is not worth getting in a crash."
"Shut up," Mika laughed, flushing. He shoved Yuu's shoulder lightly, the two laughing like deranged idiots but they didn't care. When the laughter died down and a comfortable silence ensued, he took Yuu's hand, keeping the other on the wheel. Yuu smiled when Mika squeezed his hand protectively, running his thumb across the soft milky flesh.
They headed down the bumpy dirt road before making a sharp turn on the route that headed west. An old sign came into view on the side of the road, with peeling paint and chipping wood. You are now leaving Drelacia, it said in neat, blocky letters. Population: 2367.
Yuu imagined himself with a white can of paint and a paint brush, crossing out the number and replacing it with a dripping 2365 over it.
Goodbye, Drelacia, Yuu thought, satisfied. Hello, new adventure.
- - - -
Five years later
Mika hadn't meant to stumble upon it. It was merely chance; it fell out of the sky. Literally. (Well, not really.)
"Agh!" He cried in as the suitcase fell from the top shelf in the closet, crushing his bare feet before tumbling to the ground, unlatching on impact. Cursing quietly, he sat down and rubbed his aching feet.
"Hmm?" Mika murmured curiously when he noticed a folded piece of paper, yellowed with age, had fluttered out of the compartments of the suitcase. Funny, he hadn't remembered putting a paper in there. In fact, he hadn't used this suitcase in years...
"Mika? I heard a noise, is everything okay?" Yuu was in the doorway of their bedroom, with a baby girl poised on his hip. She was sucking on a pacifier contently, watching Mika. When she saw him, she squealed happily and stretched her chubby arms out, reaching for the blonde. "Looks like Mari's been missing you."
Mari was the youngest of the seven children that lived in the Hyakyua orphanage, alongside Kei, Reisa, Reijiro, Yuki, Asuka, and Chiaki. Yuu and Mika had decided to return to the old, sleepy town of Kaelidia, where the old Hyakuya orphanage stayed, abandoned, after the foster mother died of a stroke all those years ago.
It was the perfect place to start anew, and they did: after months of cleaning the space up, fixing the heating and water supply, and finding bargains on new furniture to spruce the place up, the Hyakuya Orphanage reopened, and Yuu and Mika became Yuichiro and Mikaela Hyakuya, the proud orphan fathers.
They had their own little family in the corner of Kaelidia. When money got short from the government, they'd sell off one of the expensive trinkets Yuu brought from the castle or dipped in to their fund from Yuu's built-up allowance. Not once did Mika steal for the sake of money, and he had a non-thievery streak going on for almost five years now.
Though his mental illness never went away, he learned to cope in the little ways. Mika would play poker every Tuesday night at a local bar with some buddies. He'd pay to get into the game, but learned to have fun and not worry about making a quick buck. Instead of joining in on the rowdy festivities Yuu stayed at home and cared for the children (his favorite thing to do was play music with them, and after some saving up they were able to buy a small piano. Reisa was looking to be quite the prodigy).
Of course, they didn't have much, not even the smallest of fractions in comparison to what Yuu was used to as royalty, but where they lacked in money, they found happiness.
And that was everything the two ever wanted.
Yuu crossed the room, laughing as Mari whined and grasped at the air. He knelt down, setting her gently in Mika's lap, which greatly pleased the infant. She snuggled into his chest, knotting his shirt in her tiny fist.
"Everything's fine, Yuu-chan," Mika answered, caressing Mari's head tenderly. "I was trying to get down the suitcase for our vacation, but it decided to fall on me."
"It decided to?" Yuu teased him.
"That's what I'm going with," Mika played along.
Yuu rolled his eyes playfully, his gaze shifting to the open suitcase, and then the old piece of paper left untouched by its side. "What's that?"
"Mmm," Mika hummed. "Not sure. It fell out of the suitcase." He reached over, snatching up the piece of paper and unfolding it. Immediately he recognized it, and he felt his face warm up on instinct. He remembered how reckless he was in his teenage years, remembering the exhilarating feelings of being in love for the first time.
"The letter Yuu-chan wrote to me," He thought aloud, his eyes scanning over the page. Memories flashed in his head; he recalled reading Yuu's letter over and over in that cold jail cell, his words being Mika's only source of hope at what felt like rock bottom.
"Oh, wow! I can't even remember what I wrote on that!" Yuu chuckled, a grin lighting up on his face. He sat down next to Mika, leaning his head on his shoulder. "Well, what does it say?"
- - - -
Dear Mika,
How the hell are we going to get ourselves out of this one?
If you told me six months ago I'd be sitting alone in your cottage, debating running away from my princely life once and for all, I probably would've laughed in your face and called security to get you the hell out ofmy castle.
But no, life is funny that way, because here I am, doing just that.
Also, I'm really bad at letters too, so I apologize for any potential sappiness. I think the fact that I'm so worried is making my brain all jumbled. Yeah, let's go with that.
I read your letter. Obviously. That's why I'm responding – there's no other way for me to talk to you right now, as you're either locked in the jail or dead. Oh, Dear God, please don't be dead, Mika. Idon't know what I'd do with myself if you left me.
I'm going to get you out of there, Mika, if it's the last thing I do, but you have to follow these exact steps if you want us to be able to run away together like we'd always dreamed. If you're reading this, then that means I at least got this letter to you, which means we have the tiniest of chances to pull this off. Knowing me, that's all the hope I need to get through the next twelve hours.
In this letter, you'll find a key.
I got it from the royal guard; it should unlock your cage. Do so when the sun is low in the sky. It's a little-known secret that the royal guards are empty titles, notorious for being just for show; most of them have been on duty because they've been working for my parents for twenty years and don't have anything better to do. You'll easily be able to knock out the one on duty. Take his outfit and dress in it to get past the other guards. Keep your head low and move quickly, don't talk to anyone.
I need you to go to the floor above the dungeon; it's the royal help's living quarters. Find the one labeled Kagame-san, it's room 34. He leaves a spare key under his doormat. Everyone is at the wedding during this time, so you'll be able to sneak in unnoticed. Find an outfit of his, and dress in that. Kagame-san is my driver.
Do you get where I'm going with this? With the disguise, you'll be able to sneak into the garage and get the automobile. The queen has directed for a driver to be in front of the castle at eleven o' clock sharp, but what she's forgotten is Kagame-san has the evening off on Saturdays.
This is your part of the plan. Mine is to get away from everyone for long enough to sneak out and join you out front. If Shinoa somehow follows me there, I'll push her out of the car and we'll speed off before anyone can catch us. Hopefully I won't have to resort to such violence – in fact, I'd much prefer finding closure with her before our escape. Only time will tell which way it will work out.
And as for what you said to me in your letter...
I'm not sure if I'll be able to forgive you for what you did. However, you should know I believe you were justified in your actions, and I can understand why you did it. I would do the same in your situation, I think. It's hard to debate the ethics of stealing dilemmas, to be honest. In the difficult choices like those, I just pretend like they don't exist and hope they solve themselves... But you didn't have that luxury.
I think you made the right choice Mika, and for that, I'm willing to try to meet you halfway.
Akane told me your story (and embarrassingly enough, I cried throughout the whole thing, but don't tell anyone) and I've realized we're more similar than we think.
We've both grown up in a world where our choices were already chosen for us. We both had to resort to running away to keep ourselves sane, with you taking off in a new place whereas I slipped further and further into my own mind, pushing people away. We both wished to be free from the cruelties of our world.
Hey, Mika? Will you promise me something?
When we escape, I want you to promise me that we'll live an honest life, one where we make our own money, make our own choices, and make our own happiness.
I think it will be much more rewarding that way. But most importantly, let's do it together.
I've started to find my happiness, thanks to you, Mika. Because of you, giving me that first night of escape, I learned that I wanted to explore the world. After seventeen years of living cooped up in the same old castle, being forced to look and talk and act a certain way, I was just so tired of the lies and the loneliness, prepared to end it all... and then I met you, and it was like a breath of hope.
And today, the eve of my eighteenth birthday, I've figured it out: I want to experience that feeling more with you, Mika, if you'll let me.
So, thank you, Mika.
Thank you for teaching me to face my fears.
Thank you for showing me what it's like to be happy.
Thank you for teaching me that I deserve to be my true self, just like everyone else in this world.
Thank you for unconditionally loving me when no one else would.
And as for what else you said, I think I'm going to have to disagree with you. We haven't completely failed, not yet, we haven't. I'm not ready to lock the memories we've made in my head. No. I want to make more. I'm not willing to let go just yet, not after I've gotten a taste of the deliciously addicting freedom.
I hope you haven't given up yet either. It pains me to think that while you're reading this, you're in a jail cell, cold and scared. Hey, smile for me, okay? Even if it's the last thing you feel like doing right now, force yourself to do it.
Are you smiling? I know that sometimes, when I'm forcing myself to smile, it makes me feel just a little bit better.
Did you know you're beautiful when you smile, Mika? Actually, you're beautiful when you do a lot of things. When you laugh, when your eyes shine as you talk about youradventures, when you dance, when you look at me.
And if for some reason, God forbid, you still haven't figured it out yet (you could be pretty dense sometimes) hear me when I say that I love you too. I have since the moment I saw you admiring the stars by the secret waterfall, nothing but content in your expression. I loved the way you always looked so comfortable with yourself, the way you laughed and talked so joyously, so positively even though you were harboring a lifetime of hardship and sadness.
I didn't know it at the time, but it showed me how strong you are, Mika. At first, I just assumed I admired that about you; that I wanted to be around your positivity more.
Or maybe I was jealous at first? After all, I was the prince. I had everything I ever could've wanted, and yet I wasn't happy until I met you. Maybe I was bored, just looking for something, anything different from the boring replay of each day of my life.
It could've been any of those things, but I quickly came to realize it was much more than that. I want to be with you, Mika, for as long as you'll allow me.
Run away with me, Mika. Let's start over, take the second chance we both deserve.
I hope you'll join me tomorrow. And if you decide not to, I understand. I won't cry. You always said you hated to see me cry.
Mika let the letter rest on his knee, reading the last line, in which Yuu's handwriting had changed slightly.
I'll still love you, endlessly.
Love, Yuu.
The End.