Chapter Fifteen
"Living for others"
Mahra
“Mother.” Hamad burst into the house, and as always the first word on his mouth when he came home was ‘Mother’. “Mahra, where’s mother?” He cried as his eyes spotted me, sitting on the sofa, watching TV in the living room.
“In her room,” I replied, without taking a glance at him and kept my eyes on the TV screen instead. Usually when he comes back from work, he sits by me and asks how I was and if possible he’d tease me too, but today something else had him worked up. He didn’t chat much and made his way to mother’s room. This made me turn to him with a raised eyebrow. It must be something urgent or important; I could guess that from his rushing form. And besides, people say Salaam first. Hello! What’s going on?
I watched his back as he got in mother’s room and closed the door behind him. For a second my heart skipped a beat, Is Hamad in trouble? Has he done something wrong? And if he had, heaven forbid, would he go telling mom about it!?
Clueless and curious, I turned back to the movie that I was watching and pulled the blanket, I had on, up to my shoulders to keep me warm. The weather had gotten colder now and my fragile body couldn’t keep up with it. Hamad always made fun of me when he saw me covered in a blanket and wearing socks to keep me warm. He says I remind him of the elderly. Jerk!
Today had been quite uneventful, and unbelievably boring. But most Tuesdays usually are, I’d say. When at work, I wished just like my boss, I had taken my leave earlier too. I saw him, Zayed, get out of his office at around 11:00 o’clock and wished I’d accompany him. Since I’ve known that my boss is my brother’s best friend. It has made things even worse now. I can’t talk about ‘My boss’ in front of him, don’t know why! Nor can I make fun or call him names in front of Hamad. He doesn’t appreciate it!
I curled my hands in my laps like a young sleeping child and forgot about the TV, which was displaying a movie for no audience. My body felt weak throughout the day and there were many chances of me getting sick, ‘cause I felt the symptoms. Resting my head on the sofa, I felt my eyelids getting heavier. However, both my ears and mind were with Hamad, waiting for the doorknob to click.
At quarter past five, I opened my eyes at the sound of Hamad’s soothing laughter. I looked at the door and noticed that the meeting was finally over. My brother came out of the room with a smile on his face. When his eyes touched mine, I saw his smile turn into an evil grin. A mischievous look appeared in his brown eyes.
“Finally!” He sighed, dramatically and then smirked. I crooked an eyebrow; “What?” I asked. Hamad walked up to where I sat and upon approaching me, he grabbed hold of my long hair making me scream out his name. With his free hand he took my blanket and threw it away.
The cold air brushed me and I began scolding him, calling him names I haven’t in a while. Seeing my utter agitation, he laughed out loud. I continued cursing him and he laughed harder. Naturally his laughter was irritating if it was on me. Hamad knew what my next move was, so to save himself he let go of my hair and made for his escape. But before he could do so, I landed a punch at his arm and watched him wince. That stupid grin was still there on his lips.
I was about to aim at him again when he, somehow, got closer and clutched both my hands behind my back like I was a criminal. Comparing his size and mine I should’ve known he was capable of doing so. I struggled under his tight grip and he didn’t let go. I noticed he had placed one of his knees on my lap and his head towered mine.
“Hamad let go of me!” I yelled, trying to look in his eyes but couldn’t.
“No,” he shook his head and tightened his grip.
“Hamad Wallah I am sick, Let go.” I tried pleading him.
“You’re always sick, doesn’t really make a difference.” He said, between laughs.
“Hamad, you’re hurting me please.” This time my words came out of my heart. They weren’t fake and he seemed to realize that because his grip loosened.
“I’ll let go only on one condition.” He challenged. “Apologize!”
“But you started it.” I defended trying to break free.
“That’s the way it’s always been, ever since we were young, I start the fight and you finish it.” He said.
“Not always,” I smirked. My brother seems to have forgotten my stubbornness.
“Today you are going to finish it, ‘cause it might be the last fight we have.” He uttered.
“Why? You’re planning to finally grow up?” I ridiculed and reacted a little.
“No, but you might. Now c’mon, the sooner you apologize the earlier you go.” I heard a hint of humor in there. He was certainly enjoying himself.
“I’ll sit here with you until tomorrow morning but I am not going to apologize.” My words left an effect on him. I felt his hands slowly leave me and he kissed my head. His unexpected reaction took me by surprise and I couldn’t react. Hamad then framed my face with his hands and kissed my forehead.
“You’re forgiven.” He whispered and stared in my eyes for a good minute. There was something suddenly different in his eyes, that evil look had changed into something really brotherly, or more like fatherly.
*'♥♫*
Earlier that day,
Zayed stood at the top of a small hill that stood in the middle of their farm house. The view from the tiny plateau was incredible. The desert wore the sand like a dress. He watched the endless desert behind the borders of the farm house, the way the cold and harsh breezes helped the sand dunes to migrate from one place to another. He could almost hear an unspoken conversation between them.
‘Everything was different about his country.’ He thought. The touch of the air, the smell of the sand, even the birds seemed to speak a familiar language. He now realized what it meant to come back home. This was peace. This was home.
Suddenly he heard the beep of a car horn and turned to see Hamad in his car, with the window half open. He greeted Zayed with a smile and Zayed somehow managed to return it.
“Halla Wallah, (Hello there)” He welcomed, not surprised to see him, in fact he had been waiting for him the past twenty minutes. This was why he left work earlier today.
“What are you doing here alone?” Hamad asked, looking around him.
“Waiting for you,” Zayed replied. “Park the car and come with me for a walk.”
“Is that why you invited me? To accompany you for a walk?” Hamad joked.
“Will you head back home if I said ‘yes’?” Zayed taunted.
“I might,” Hamad shrugged his shoulders and played along.
“Well then, it’s a ‘No’!” Zayed declared and turned to give Hamad his back; “I am waiting for you near the horses paddock.” He spoke loud enough for him to hear and made his way down the hill to where the horses were.
Once there, he stood next to the fences; “Abhar!” He called out to his Arabian horse, Abhar. Her eyes were large and extremely attentive, just like her ears. She had recognized Zayed’s voice and turned, now she came walking towards him with a ladylike stride.
Zayed brought her here a long time ago, when Abhar was just a mare. He had adored her remarkable looks, her courage, intelligence and above all her nobility.
Abhar bowed her head slightly as a greeting to Zayed, making him smile. He put his hand on her head and began to stroke her temple. She stayed still and didn’t move, loving the care of her master. He then whispered little nothings to her and she nickered at the sound of his voice.
“I haven’t seen her in a long time.” came Hamad’s voice from behind him.
“Yeah,” Zayed replied, glancing at him. “She grows prettier every day.” He praised. Hamad walked over to stand next to him and then began caressing the horse just like Zayed.
“She’s grown up, hasn’t she?” He uttered. Abhar was perfection in its self and was gray in color. Her coat was thick, soft and silky that shone like diamonds from far away. There was a pink snip on her nose that separated her from the others.
“Yes, very much.” Zayed said. “Do you remember the first time we brought her here?”
“Oh,” Hamad grinned. “How can I forget? Abhar was the reason Rashid broke his hand.” He laughed.
When Zayed’s horse was first brought to the farm, she had been a secret of the three boys; they weren’t allowed to spend a great fortune on a horse. No one knew about her for quite awhile, the boys had hidden her for a month. One day Rashid tried to ride the horse, and in doing so he had broken his hand. That was how Waleed found out and because of Rashid the boys were let off lightly. Remembering those memories Zayed joined Hamad in laughing.
“Speaking of Rashid, do you think he was serious when he said he wanted to get married?” Zayed questioned after containing himself. Hamad kept his eyes on Abhar.
“I don’t know. With Rashood you never know.” He said. “Why do you ask?”
Zayed waited before answering. There was something very malicious going on in his brain. He knew that if he said the words that were on his mind, he’d sound very bitter. But because of the rage of his friend’s betrayal he wanted to be cruel to him.
“Was wondering if he would make a good brother in law!?” Zayed declared. “You know; he and my younger sister.” In reality he wanted to punch Hamad right there and then, but for now, his venomous words to Hamad were enough to ease his heart.
He knew Hamad well enough to know what his soft spot was; and just what he had imagined came true. Zayed took a glance at Hamad and saw his face go pale. He had stopped caressing the horse, not uttering a word and refused to look at Zayed.
Zayed observed his friend closely, feeling somewhat content, that he hurt the man who hurt him. But Hamad’s reaction also showed his love for Mona. He looked as if someone had swept the earth from under his feet.
‘What an idiot!’ thought Zayed, smiling.
“But that isn’t why I called you here.” He purposefully broke the awkward silence after awhile. Hamad managed to direct his gaze towards Zayed and gave him a questioning look.
“This way,” Zayed beckoned him to the outdoor patio area which was a little far from the paddock. He took the lead and began to organize his thoughts. They both got in the glass patio room, from which they could see the horses. They sat down and called one of the servants to bring them Arabic coffee.
Zayed took the seat opposite to Hamad, so that he could see his expressions and reactions, clearly throughout his speech. “I suppose I have told you how desperately my mother wants me to get settled?” He began, looking at Hamad’s confused expressions from across the table.
“Yeah, you’ve mentioned it once or twice.” Hamad looked at him ardently.
“Well,” Zayed leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and locking his fingers. “I have thought of completing my half deen as well.” He announced.
It took Hamad a few seconds to react; “What a blessed hour it is!” He then gushed. “Zayed has finally decided to get married.” Hamad was genuinely happy for his friend. “Who’s the lucky girl?”
Zayed looked down at his feet and smirked, remaining silent, upon which Hamad said; “I am sure no girl is fool enough to reject you.”
This made Zayed look up at his friend and he put on a smile. “Well, that’s what you’re here for.”
Hamad crooked his eyebrows in confusion. Zayed could see many questions rising in his eyes. “I’ll be glad to be of any help.” Hamad said, looking at him expectantly, to deliver the news.
His friend remained silent for awhile, searching for a good way to convey his message. Today inside he was a burning volcano about to burst but Zayed being cold-hearted, killed all his desires, and stepped out as a man who would fulfill everyone’s wishes. A man who’ll live for others!
“Hamad, my friend.” He began, not wanting to address him as a friend. He had never accosted him in such a formal way but today his rage was being delivered in fine words. He didn’t know how that was even possible. He didn’t know how he managed to tame his anger.
“No one but my father has knowledge of what I am going to say next. I called you hear today to ask you this in person, before the elders take any action.” Zayed paused, waiting to see what reaction Hamad had.
“What is it?” The silence that followed Hamad’s question was almost agonizing.
“I want to ask you for your sister’s hand in marriage!” Zayed spoke, carefully, not sure if Hamad had heard him, but his expressions assured that he had. He seemed dumbstruck!
In the next few seconds that ticked by Hamad restrained himself a little not sure what to say and Zayed gave him some time to let the information sink deeper in his skin.
“So let me get this straight,” Hamad went on, now smiling ear-to-ear. His facial appearance changed a little. He was breathing again now! “You are asking for my sister’s hand? I mean for Mahra’s hand in marriage?” Just saying her name made Hamad smile widely. Suddenly a picture of Mahra flashed before his eyes; her laugh, her anger and above all her attitude. He had never in his wildest dreams thought of Zayed & Mahra together!
“Yes, I suppose you only have one younger sister.” Zayed replied, making Hamad chuckle.
Coffee arrived and they both watched as the servant served them. Hamad leaned back on his chair, relaxing a bit after hearing this news.
When they both were left alone, and after Hamad collected himself; “Is she aware of your intentions? My sister I mean?” He put forward, his voice filled with curiosity. Mahra’s picture in his head, served as a reminder of his responsibilities. He had to play the role of a brother, a father and a guardian. After all he is the only carer she has.
“No,” Zayed shook his head. He knew Hamad would ask this question. “Like I told you earlier no one but my father has knowledge of this.” He said, playing with the small Arabic coffee cup, making everything look unbelievably effortless. “As my friend and being her brother, you have the right of being asked for your opinion.” He made fun. Hamad grinned.
“If you ask me,” He looked at his friend, composed. “I couldn’t wish for a better brother-in-law.” Hamad played back, but his eyes were serious. Zayed stared back in them wanting him to see what he really wished, to see that his up-coming words would be nothing but a lie.
“I am glad you’re pleased with this decision.” Zayed announced, slowly and very delicately.
“And this is how you ask for her hand in marriage?” Hamad made fun, a soft smile now played on the corner of his lips. He seemed glad and completely oblivious about the things that Zayed, as a friend, wanted him to know. Zayed plastered a smile on his face too, leaning back on the chair with his coffee in his hand; “Well, you know I am not that good at formalities.” He joked again and they laughed.
“Upon your word, I’ll send my family over to start things.” He offered, smiling. Some part of Zayed didn’t understand how he could be so fine with such disorder. It was now he realized that he could put on a good act. And if things went the way his father wanted them to, this game will never end.
“Yes, that’d be great.” Hamad replied, and was quiet again, amazed at the ignorance of people about fate. He’d played a dirty game and persuaded his sister in promising him that she’d marry anyone he wanted. But at that point never did he ever think that that man would be Zayed.
And in the game of destiny Zayed had made his second move, now there was no turning back!
*'♥♫*
Mahra
Friday, 3:40 PM
I was deep asleep and fighting with Hamad in my dream, cursing him for I don’t remember why, when I felt the earth shake beneath me and my eyes lifted open. It took them a few seconds to adjust with the lights. I sensed a pair of hands on my legs and my body still shook back and forth.
“Khaloo Mahra goomi, (Aunty Mahra, wake up.)” said my niece Asma’s voice. She stood at the corner of the bed and shook me with all the power she had.
“No Asoom,” I moaned and closed my eyes. “Please close the door and go to your mom.” I murmured and shoved a pillow over my head, hoping my persistent niece will give up and leave me alone. But she didn’t.
“Khaloo Mahra,” I heard her now close to my ear. She had somehow managed to climb on my bed. At first I wanted to chastise her so that she’ll go away, but then I remembered I hadn’t seen her in awhile so I turned to face her. She stared back at me with her dark eyes, wearing a beautiful smile that I couldn’t resist. I put my hand on her small shoulder and pulled her in my blanket. She laughed and resisted.
“Let’s sleep.” I told her and kissed her forehead.
“Mahra,” Reem’s voice came from the hallway. I rolled my eyes in my head and pressed my eyelids shut as hard as I could. I didn’t want to get up!
“There you are,” She huffed as she entered my room and turned the lights on. “What are you doing still sleeping? It’s almost four o’clock. You’ll miss your ‘Asr prayer.” I was sure mom didn’t tell her that I was sick.
“Reem, please take your daughter away and let me sleep. I am not feeling well.” And I seriously didn’t.
“Is this how you greet your sister?” She came and grabbed the edge of my blanket and pulled it. “I came all the way from Abu Dhabi just to see you.” Reem came to stand by me. I opened my eyes to look at her, my niece had her dark eyes. They stared at me in disapproval. She then put her hand on my forehead to check my temperature.
“You’re fine. Mom said you’ve been well since yesterday Alhamdulillah. Get up now, we’ll be having guests.” Reem went on, and walked up to open the curtains allowing the sunlight to embrace the room. I grunted but finally got up from the bed, so did Asma.
I entered the rest room to perform ablution meanwhile my sister made my bed, when I came out she handed me a big scarf for Salah and then sat on my bed watching me pray. I must say she was a bit distracting, I kept wondering; what did she want!?
My family has been acting a bit weird these days.
“Taqabball Allah,” She said, as I finished.
“Minna wa minkum.” I replied. There was a smile in her eyes as she looked at me. “Who’s coming? You said we are expecting guests!” I asked.
“Yeah about that,” She nodded. “Come here.” She summoned me to sit by her on the bed. My sister examined me for awhile which was confusing. She seemed a little hesitant on how to begin the conversation. “Now that you are all calm after praying, I would want you listen to me till the end.”
“What is it?” I instantly grew impatient; her words had an opposite effect. She shook her head and tsk-ed.
“Look Mahra, I am not going to give you the same lecture you hear from mom everyday but unfortunately I don’t have a new one either….didn’t have enough time to prepare one!” she murmured the last part.
“Wait,” I shrunk back a little with furrowed eye brows. “You’re making me worried.”
“There’s nothing to worry about, a few women are coming to see you… and they want to get to know us. That’s all.” Reem added. I frowned.
“What do you mean when you say ‘see you’?” I think I already knew the answer but I just needed some more time to prepare a good reaction, that’ll make my family stop doing what they were doing. Should I act frustrated, which has worked a few times or should I simply start crying, I hadn’t tried that one before.
“Oh c’mon a girl in her early twenties why else would a bunch of women come to see her?” There we go! My sister wasn’t going to say it in words either. She knew I knew it was about my marriage and I couldn’t act dumber, it’ll be embarrassing!
“And who are these women? Do we know them?” I didn’t know why I used a super calm tone. Something stopped me from being aggressive or emotional. I had a plan building in my head. I decided to play along with them now and when the right time came I’d say ‘No’. Besides if I say no now, they all will pressurize me, just like they did last time.
“Mom doesn’t know them that well, but they’re Hamad’s friend’s family.” Reem informed.
I remained silent and the words ‘Hamad’s friend’ kept ringing in my brain. Reem stared at me as if she was expecting me to burst out and be violent any minute. Throw the pillows on the table, breaking a vase or anything. But I had no reaction.
“But you guys know that I don’t want to get married?” I whispered.
“Don’t forget the promise you made with Hamad!” Reem reminded.
“But I didn’t mean th..” I began and she cut me mid-sentence.
“Mahra just for once in your life act mature and do something for mom’s sake without any drama.” Her words were harsh and they made me mad.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I said, a bit taken a back.
“You see her, don’t you? Every single day she is so worried about you, your future but you just don’t care.”
“I care more about her than you think I do.” I spat.
“Oh yeah, then show it. Go get ready and come down to see the guests.”
“I will.” I flared-up. How could she say I don’t care about mother? I would do anything for her and it’s no big deal. It’s just some women coming to see me I can easily put a drama forward and refuse them and their proposal later.
“I’ll call you when the guests are here.” She said as she went out the room.
What have I gotten myself into?!
*'♥♫*
5:15 PM
Nervous, yes I was nervous. Even though I had done this a couple of times but I didn’t know why I was having cold feet. I was shaking my feet multiple times as I sat on the chair, looking myself in the mirror. I had applied light make-up just the way my mother liked it and was wearing a not too fancy jalabiya. It was pink in color and had some embroidery on the neck and sleeves. I didn’t know should I dress well to appease my mom or under dress so that these people don’t choose me.
I heard a soft knock on the door and seconds later Reem appeared from behind the door. She smiled when she looked at me but I couldn’t return it. Her last words still rang in my brain.
“Let’s go, mom called for you.” She said and my heart sank deeper in my chest. The serious circumstances had me thinking that this was it. My life was over.
“How many are they?” I managed to utter, and stood up.
“Two, it’s the mother and the older sister.” I nodded and she let me lead the way. When we were close to the stairs, she ushered me to go on alone and I shook my head, refusing. She told me with some hand gestures that she’d follow me, which made me sigh and I made for it.
As I reached the top of the stairs from where the living room could be seen clearly, I saw three people sitting there, talking. They looked up at me when they saw me coming, my mother, beside her was a women in her mid-thirties. I didn’t know her and as I averted my gaze from her, my own eyes opened wide in shock.
There sitting next to them was…Umm Zayed.
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