Chapter 16. It's Unfair but, I Don't Mind. "Now shut up and kiss me,"
I get in the house and leave my shoes by the door and coat on the rack and head straight for my room. I drop my bag on my bedside table.
"Lawrence," I call out, knowing he was still here. I feel a tap on my shoulder, I almost yell. I begin to hit Ray and he pulls me in his arms.
"Hello to you too, how was your night," He asks politely.
"Great! Really fun, I got a bunch of new people numbers basically stole Drew friends. Chase happened to be one of those friends. Yes, he's back in town. We're gonna hang out with him soon. I missed you though. How was your night?" I say as he smiles.
"Well you know Barbie and I went on a date to the kitchen, your dad and I did man things, I went home for a while, Daya and I talked, I ate a lot, slept for bit and maybe about twenty minutes ago I came back here," He says.
"Barbie." I laugh and smiles.
"Your taste in women, wow," I add poking him.
"I normally hear wow out of your mouth for another reason," Ray jokes and I punch his chest playfully and he laughs.
"But my night hasn't been quite eventful," He adds.
"We're going to change that now that I'm home, the party shall start. But we have to call Daya and tell her we love her because you know her special ways kick in," I say pushing him on the couch and sitting on his lap, he chuckles.
"And you have to sit on my lap because," He asks.
"One you really don't care or mind, two I don't know why really and three I'm comfortable, so if you don't like it. . . to bad mister," I smile, more like smirk. He shakes his head as my phone buzzes.
"Daya! Right on time we were just about to call you," I say as I answer her FaceTime.
"How'd she come in Lawrence," She asks, skipping right to the point.
"Happy, like she enjoyed herself then she was scared and pissed, because I scared her," He laughs.
"I did enjoy hanging out with Drew and his friends tonight. I even ran, well hung out with Chase. I got some new friends and numbers as well," I say.
"Chase?! He's back in town," Daya asks.
"Yes. He wants to hang out with us all when you get back," I smile.
"You have fun with Drew," She asks with a smirk.
"No I did not make out nor kiss Drew, Daya. It wasn't date, he's not my boyfriend. He's hardly a friend," I laugh and Ray chuckles.
"Y'all hanging out again soon or is he taking you out on a date at some point," She asks.
"Yes, were going on date soon. And depending on that date we'll see if we should remain friends or continue dating and see where that leads us from there," I tell Daya, she squeals.
"Yay Maria!! My baby's growing up. She's been had her first kiss, recently had her first real kiss, got a hot boy liking her who is older, her bestie likes her too, Ray our Marie is growing up so quickly. The tears," Daya jokes, Ray wipes his fake tears and lay his head on my shoulder faking to be really emotional.
"Poor babies," I laugh patting Ray's face.
"I'm sorry Daya if I could comfort you I would," I say sympathetically.
"So you like Drew," She asks softly, I felt awkward talking about this in front of Ray because I do like him and he likes me.
"Yeah. He's nice," I say.
"You know what I mean Mare," She says and I sigh nodding.
"Yes. Not a lot though. It's like oooh he's cute and funny, I wanna get to know him. .. crush stuff," I explain softly and she nods.
"Well, I've got this guy name Jess that likes me but, I like his cousin Zac and I don't want to come off as mean or give them the wrong impression of what type of girl I am. I also don't want to lead either of them on though because it could possibly only be a summer thing unless one of them happens lives in Houston or even just Texas itself and is just on summer vaca like I am," She says.
"Tell them that then. You like Zac not Jess. They're both cool guys I take it, but if you feel as though it's gonna start trouble or drama in your life and vaca then drop them. . . like seriously now. Just lose their numbers, all contact and thoughts of them Day," I say sternly.
"Good words Mare," Ray says punching my fist and I laugh.
"Thank Mare, I love y'all," She says smiling.
"Love you too," Ray and I say together.
"Hey! No one asked me about anything," Ray says pouty lipped.
"How's life bro," Daya asks.
"Uhh, girls, girls and girls. What about it? It's a nonexistent thing in my life, well other than you two. Food is a blessing and sleep is its best friend or maybe it's the best and worst curse in this world. I'm not sure," Lawrence says dramatically, Daya and I laugh.
"Better make a move on Mare before all the guys take her away. Goodnight y'all," Daya laughs.
"Goodnight babe," I smile at her.
"Goodnight Day," Ray says and I hang up and put my phone in my lap. I look at Lawrence and grab his neck gently, whispering in his ear,
"Hi my name is nonexistent. Lay with me again tonight?" Smiling as I get off his lap. Lawrence stands up and smiles.
"Why does it seem like my Maria is only my Maria in the morning and at midnight," He says as I go into my closet to change.
"I don't know. I'm not sure why," I say and he chuckles. We go up to my hidden room and I pull him down on the couch with me and curl up into him as I pull the cover over us. When settled I sigh peacefully.
"I'm getting a bit greedy with this, whole sleeping cuddle buddy thing, but it's such a nice feeling," I say sleepily and Lawrence laughs softly at me and holds me tighter. I shiver and hold his side tighter. Gosh I'm so selfish, it's disgusting hanging out with Drew then cuddling with Lawrence feeling all warm and comfortable. I don't. . . It's not fair.
"Mare," I hear Lawrence repeat.
"Maria," He says grazing my cheek with his thumb, I look up at him.
"Sorry. Yes," I say giving him my attention.
"What were you thinking so deeply about," He asks.
"I'm a good person right? Because I don't feel like I'm being a good person. I feel selfish and greedy. I feel bad to be feeling good right now. I feel bad for mentioning Drew around you like that while we were on FaceTime. I feel bad for being in your arms right now when all Drew wanted to do was give me one kiss or receive one tonight. I just. . ." I say before Lawrence cuts me off.
"You're an absolutely amazing, perfectly imperfect, beautiful, kind, caring person. Don't feel bad for being you ever again, be selfish, selfless, greedy and needy sometimes because you deserve that Maria. Don't feel bad for any of us we know what we're doing. But I never want you to think that you're a bad person because you're doing what you want, what makes you human Mare," Lawrence says his top half of his body hovering over me. I nod unable to speak. He leans down and kiss me, and I realize I don't want him to stop, that I want to kiss him like this for as long as I can, even if I lose my breath. He moves away from my lips and kiss my neck softly. I sigh in enjoyment and flip us over so I'm straddling him. I lean down and kiss him again. I pull away to breathe, his fingers graze the exposed skin of my waist and stomach that my shirt didn't cover, I shiver at his touch very nervous of the feelings I feel because of this intense moment he started. I lean down and nibble at the skin on his neck and that causes him to breathe in sharply, I bite on his neck with a little more pressure then to ease the pain I suck it softly and leave a kiss on it, I hear his uneven breaths and I giggle.
"You know for a girl that's never had a boyfriend, you're quite experienced in taking my breath away," He says, I look at him and peck his lips, smiling.
"Sorry. I don't know what just happened," I say blushing, glad it's dark in this room.
"But I liked it. Who knew Mare was a freak," Ray jokes and it causes me to blush more.
"You provoked me," I say softly, defending myself.
"You. . . I couldn't help myself," He says defeated.
"You wanna know something," I asks my hips rest in between his legs and my head on his stomach, as I play with his fingers.
"We both didn't want it to end. The feeling scared us, you didn't mind it and I realized I like you more than I even imagined possible ever really," He says and my heart stopped, my mind went blank.
"Mare? Maria," Ray says.
"I was going to say, I didn't want to stop, I didn't mind it, the feelings did scare me and we're setting someone either Drew or us up for pain. Or maybe all of us. But I want," I say stopping myself as I lift up to Ray face intertwining or hands and he presses my hips to his.
"More of this closeness," He says huskily. I nod and kiss him.
"But I was trying to say. . . I want you," I say kissing him again.
"More of you," I added before he grab my neck and my lips meet his again. He flips us over so now he's resting in between my legs, which are wrapped around his waist as we continue to hiss.
"This is crazy," I moan out as he kiss my neck and he smiles.
"You're beautiful. You know that? I mean you ought to be sick of hearing me say it but god... I mean it," He says grazing my cheek. I play with his hair on the back of his head and he close his eyes and sigh enjoying my fingers in his hair. He leans down and kiss my nose, I giggle, bucking my hips into his and he groans at the contact.
"Sorry," I say as he kiss me. He pulls away and lays next to me. Fifteen minutes later his breathing is light. I lean on my forearm and put my hand under his shirt and trace his abs, to see if he's up, he stays still. I kiss his jawline.
"Geez, if it wasn't for Drew, I'd ask you out and make you My Ray in a heartbeat kid," I giggle softly, trying to see if he was asleep, I see his smile and lay my head on his chest still tracing his abs.
"You're My Maria. Dating or not. I think of you as My Maria. Now when you start seeing other people if it's not me *hint hint* then you'll just be My Best Friend Maria to the public. But we'll know the truth. We'll keep it to ourselves," He says.
"Hint, Hint, you want to be with me. True or False? I want to be with you," I asks.
"Terribly true," Ray says strained.
"Why is it terribly true," I asks.
"Because it wont. . . or should I say can't really happen right now," He says strained still.
"Why," I ask. He claps twice and we both sit up, he pulls me in his arms and grabs a blanket.
"Because I wont let it happen," He says. I begin to say something a bit confused but he puts his index finger under my jaw and turn my head to look him in the eyes.
"You need to date and figure out if there's someone better than Drew and I out there. I can't ask much of you right now. So live a little and I'll always be your Ray,"
"You got that kind of love that I want, let me get that. And baby once I get it, I'm yours no take backs," I grin lightening up the mood, he chuckles.
"Seriously, I want you. But I want all of you. You understand that," Ray says and I smile.
"100% Absolutely," I say as I peck his shoulder.
"Sooo . . . this best friend thing," I ask unsure.
"We're best friends that want to be together. Nothing less, nothing more," He says.
"So I can do this," I say straddling him, my hands roaming his upper body and lips on his neck, he moans softly.
"And not feel guilty because we're best friends that wants to be together and happens to want each other," I ask as he grips my waist.
"Yes," He says hoarsely.
"Yeah. Absolutely," He adds clearly, I giggle.
"Great. Because I really like feeling you squirm in pleasure because of me," I smirk.
"The feeling is mutual," He says.
"Lie down with me and hold me in your arms," I quote Ed Sheeran lyrics and Ray smiles.
"I was made to keep your body warm. But I'm cold as the wind blows, so hold me in your arms," Ray sings back to me quoting the lyrics as well.
"I'm in love now," He adds skipping a couple lines, I shake my head smiling.
"Kiss me like you wanna be loved," I sing back.
"We're lame," He says.
"Shutup and kiss me," I laugh and he kisses me passionately.
"This feels like falling in love," I sing eyes closed, softly.
"Falling in.. love," He says, before clapping twice and the lights go off. I face him as I begin to fall asleep, he kiss my cheek.
"We're falling in love," He sings before I fall into a peaceful sleep.
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Would you like different POVs? orrrr just Maria point of view????
QUESTIONS !
1. Do you think Mare is being unfair to not only Ray but also Drew ? Why? Or do you simply think it's unfair to Ray(Lawrence)?
2. How do you think Ray's(Lawrence) feeling about their situation?
3. How many of y'all LOVEEEE (like a beautiful but insane obsession) FOOD?!?! Because I do, I even love healthy food toooo much! lol
Hope you enjoyed this chapter and THANK YOU FOR READING!!!
Until Next Time | xxo Bri