"Hey, ready for the party?" Carter asked, as he walked into Finn's house with Garrett behind him.
"Not really," I said, sitting up on the sofa and crossing my legs.
"Get ready, or are you going in sweats?" Carter questioned, sitting down on the couch.
"Do I have to go?" I asked.
"Yeah, we're all going," Garrett told me. He was sitting on the opposite sofa, next to Carter. "Ryan, will be here soon."
"Come on, Rox," Finn tried convincing me, as he walked down the stairs.
"Everyone ready to go?" Ryan asked, walking through the front door and closing it behind him.
He was wearing black jeans like he always did. He also wore a black leather jacket with a white shirt under it. He wore his black Vans and had his hair styled back. I had to admit, he looked hot.
"Not yet, but I will be," I mentioned, as I stood and walked up the stairs.
I walked into Finn's room and locked the door behind me. I looked through the closet and hoped I had something in here. Towards the back, I found a black dress.
"Yes," I said to myself, as I took out the dress and placed it on the bed.
I decided to straighten my waves real quickly with the straightener I usually left at Finn's house. I stripped myself of my clothes and put on some black spandex shorts on, then my dress. The dress was quite simple. It had no designs of sorts and it was mid-thigh length so it wasn't super short. The dress also had tank top straps. I looked in the mirror and liked my appearance. The dress hugged me in all the right spots. Now I just needed some shoes. I looked around and noticed my hi-top all black chucks by the bed.
"Why not?" I mumbled to myself and put on the shoes.
I got my small black leather shoulder bag and put my things in it. Once I was ready, I walked out of the room and down the stairs.
"Woo! Roxy!" Carter whistled, standing up from the couch. "You look hot, you'll for sure find yourself a guy tonight."
"The shoes are an awesome touch, by the way," Garrett complimented, as he stood and walked over to me.
"Thanks."
"Alright, let's go, guys," Finn said, and we all walked out of the house.
Carter had called shotgun so he went in the front while Garrett, Ryan, and I went in the back.
It was about a twenty minute drive from Finn's house to the party. When we arrived, Finn parked his car on the side of the street. I left my bag in Finn's car and just carried my phone with me. We all got out of the car and walked to the house. You could hear the music blasting from the house, as we walked up the driveway. When we got to the porch, over to the left was a couple making out. We walked in and the music was much louder inside. The living room lights to our left were a bit dim. There were people dancing in the living room and people just talking and hanging out in the hallway and the kitchen to our right.
"I'll talk to you guys later," Carter said, before walking away. Probably to mingle.
The four of us walked into the kitchen. Finn noticed Grace with her friends and went over to her. She was going to be at this party too. Once he greeted her, Finn and Grace walked out towards the backyard.
Garrett, Ryan, and I got something to drink. I got a water bottle, while Ryan and Garrett both got soda. We stood around the island, chatting.
"I want to dance. Who wants to dance with me?" I asked Garrett and Ryan.
They both looked at each, and then Garrett stepped forward. Garrett and I walked over to the living room and began dancing. The song 'Uptown Funk' came on, and more people started to dance. I enjoyed dancing. It was always fun.
It wasn't always like that, though. I was always too shy to dance. All of that changed when Garrett became friends with me and Finn. Surprisingly, Garrett loves dancing so he usually insisted on me to join in when we went to school dances and eventually high school parties. It was Garrett who brought me out of my shell. Because of him, I started trying new and different things. He helped me grow as a person. That was one of the many reasons why I was grateful for his friendship.
Garrett and I danced for quite some time, then I got a bit tired and stepped away to get water. Another girl took my spot and danced with him. It was fine as I wasn't coming back anytime soon.
I walked into the kitchen. There weren't that many people but there were still a few left. Ryan was in the corner, talking to Rogelio and a few other guys. I saw a couple by the table, making out. I took a seat by the island, as I drank from my new water bottle.
A guy, who I had never met before, walked up to the island and got something to drink. He stared at me as he did so.
"Hey," he said to me.
"Hi," I responded.
"What's your name?" he asked, leaning over the island.
"Roxanne," I replied.
"I'm Walter." He walked around the island and stood in front of me. "Wanna dance?"
"No, thanks. I'm tired," I politely declined.
"Oh, come on. It'll be fun." He was breathing on my face, as he got closer, and I could smell the alcohol on his breath.
"Back up, dude." I put my hand on his chest and gently pushed him back.
"Let's just dance." He came back even closer and put his hand on my waist.
"Dude, move." I slapped his hand away. The nerve of this guy.
"What if I don't want to?" He smirked and brought both his hands to my waist again.
"Move." I tried to push his hands away, but he had a good grip.
"Roxy." Ryan moved the guys hands off me and got in between the guy and I. He stood in front of me, blocking the guy.
"Back off, man, this doesn't concern you," he growled at him.
"Actually, it does concern me." Ryan stood his ground. Not once moving. His hands were balled into fists.
"What? Is she your girlfriend?" he asked.
"Yes, she is, and I suggest you leave," Ryan told him, taking a small step forward.
"Whatever, man, keep your girlfriend," the guy mumbled and walked off somewhere else.
Ryan turned to look at me.
"Are you alright? Did he do anything to you?" Ryan asked. His eyes searched for mine.
"I'm fine, all he did was put his hands on my waist," I assured him.
"I know. I thought you were just talking, but then I saw you smack his hand away. I knew you didn't want him around you," he explained, crouching down to face me better.
"Can we go outside for some fresh air?" I asked, standing up.
"Yeah, let's go." He led me outside, and I followed.
We stepped outside into the fresh air. A little too fresh because I got goosebumps.
"Let's go for a walk," Ryan suggested.
I nodded my head in agreement, and we walked down the sidewalk. I crossed my arms over my chest and rubbed my bare arms.
"Here." Ryan took off his jacket and handed it to me.
I gladly took the jacket and put it on. It fit a bit big but that was fine. I was glad my arms were starting to warm up.
"Thank you."
We continued to walk down the sidewalk in silence. It was nice. I liked knowing he was right beside me.
We walked further along the sidewalk when we noticed a group of guys walking on the same sidewalk, coming our way. Ryan pulled me to his side and put his arm around me, just as the guys walked past us.
"Bro, did you see that chick? She was hot," one of them said, as they passed us.
Ryan made no move to remove his arm. He kept his arm around me.
"Want to go back to the party or do you just want to keep walking? We could also call the guys," Ryan suggested.
It was only ten at night, and I didn't want the guys to leave the party already.
"No, don't do that, my house is close, we can just go there. I'll text Finn telling him where we are," I offered.
"Alright," he agreed, as we continued to walk. Ryan removed his arm away from my shoulders and brought it down to hold my right hand. We walked for another five minutes before we got to my house.
We both walked up the pathway to my house. I remembered I only had my phone with me. I had left my bag in Finn's car.
"I forgot my bag," I murmured to Ryan. "Wait, the spare." I let go of his hand, walked around the side of the house, and opened the gate leading to the backyard, while Ryan followed.
We both got to the back doors which led into the house. I walked over to a table we had outside and reached under the table where we had a key hidden. I got the key and unlocked the door. When we both stepped inside, I turned on some lights.
"Want something to drink or anything?" I asked Ryan, as we walked into the kitchen.
"Just water please."
I walked over to the fridge and got him a water bottle then handed it to him.
"I'm going to go upstairs and change. Go ahead and go into the living room and watch some tv if you want." I went into the living room and up the stairs into my bedroom.
I closed the door behind me and undressed. I put on some sweats and one of my T-shirts, then put my hair up in a bun. I got another pair of sweats and Ryan's jacket. I walked out of my room without any shoes and just socks on my feet.
Ryan was sitting on the couch with the tv on.
"Here's your jacket." I handed it to him, as I took a seat on the sofa beside him. "Thanks again."
"You're welcome."
"And here's a pair of sweats." I handed them to him. "You can wear them. Actually, they're yours. They're the ones I wore over spring break."
"Alright." He stood from the sofa.
"Wanna watch a movie?" I asked.
"Yeah, sure."
"Go ahead and choose a movie. I'll go make some popcorn." I stood from the sofa and went to the kitchen.
I got started on the popcorn and when it was done, I put it in a bowl. I walked back into the living room and took a seat on the sofa beside Ryan. He had already changed into the sweatpants. I sat Indian style and put the bowl in between us.
"What movie are we watching?"
"50 First Dates," he replied.
"I love that movie, it's hilarious," I said, before texting Finn to let him know where we were.
We watched the movie and laughed through it, eating the popcorn. I always found this movie funny.
When the movie finished, Ryan had taken off his shoes. I had put the bowl on the coffee table in front of us and we just talked.
"Roxy," Ryan started.
"Hmm?" I rested my head against his shoulder.
"Why does Finn call you 'Rox?'" he asked.
"I really don't know. He always did, even when we first met," I told him.
"You guys have been best friends forever, haven't you?" he questioned.
"Yeah." I smiled. "We've been best friends since elementary school. He's like my brother. What about you and Garrett? How long has he been your best friend?"
"Since sophomore year, when I started hanging out with you guys," he told me. "He's awesome."
"Yeah, he is. Whenever I need some cheering up, he always knows how to cheer me up." I grinned. "You know, I actually remember when you joined our little group." I took a deep breath.
"You do?" He turned to look at me.
I sat back and faced him. "Yeah, I remember the four of us were sitting at our usual table at lunch. Then you came up to our table. Finn stood and introduced you. I remember thinking..." I trailed off. "Never mind." I stopped.
"You remember thinking what?" he asked.
"Nothing," I murmured.
"What was it? Go ahead, tell me," he urged me, eyes focused on mine.
"Nothing really, I just remember thinking like 'hey, he's pretty attractive,'" I mentioned.
"Really?" He raised his eyebrows.
"Yeah, a lot of girls probably think so, not just me," I told him.
"Maybe." He shrugged, before inching closer to me.
"So, uh, have you told that girl you like her?" I asked, lost in his eyes.
"No, maybe I will. I still don't know." He backed away a little. "You know, Roxy, when I first met you guys that day at lunch, I remember thinking 'wow, she's pretty,'" he admitted.
"Really?" A smile threatened to form on my lips.
"Yeah, you're still very pretty, you know. Well, actually...you're beautiful," he confessed, and he leaned in again.
Ryan was only a few inches away from my face. His blue eyes were gazing into my eyes. If he or I inched a bit closer, our faces would meet.
That's just what happened. In just a second, his lips connected with mine. I closed my eyes and let him. His lips were soft. I didn't know they would be. He cupped my face, while my arms wrapped around him. He deepened the kiss and moved his body a bit closer to mine.
When we both pulled away, I brought my hands down to my lap. I was out of breath, and so was he. Our eyes gazed into each other, never once breaking eye contact. His eyes were a vibrant blue.
Ryan leaned in again and kissed me once more. I kissed him as well, but this time it was different. This kiss was more passionate. I put my arms around his neck, while he put his hands around my waist and pulled me closer to him. I pulled away this time first because of a lack of air.
I had just kissed Ryan. One of my best friends. Not once, but twice.
"Roxy, I—" Ryan was cut off by the sound of the door opening.
Finn had a key. He opened the door and walked in with Garrett and Carter.
"Hey, guys," Garrett said, as they closed the door behind them.
Ryan and I looked at each other then backed away.
"You guys want something to drink?" I offered, my eyes solely looking at Finn.
"Some water, please," Garrett said.
I stood from the sofa and walked to the kitchen. I opened the fridge and got two water bottles. Finn walked into the kitchen, just as I had turned around.
"Finn, I have so much to tell you, but not here, the guys will hear," I told him.
"Alright, long story short, before the guys hear." He looked over his shoulder. "Go."
"Okay. Jerk at party, Ryan and I left, my house, movie, talking, and then kissing," I quickly said.
"Whoa, you too kissed?" Finn asked, eyes wide.
"Yeah, we..." I stopped talking as soon as the guys walked into the kitchen.
Garrett sat down on a stool at the kitchen island. I handed him and Carter a water bottle.
"I'll be back, I have to get something from my room." I walked out of the kitchen.
"Rox, I think I left some sweats here last time." Finn followed my lead.
We both walked up to my bedroom, and I explained more in detail what happened. Everything from leaving the party to coming to my house to Ryan and I kissing.
"Rox, do you know what this means? He likes you, it's most definitely," he told me.
"What if it was just an 'in the moment' kind of thing?" I asked.
"Roxanne," he started. "Even I know you're not that delusional."
A gasp escaped my lips. "Finn, don't use my government name." It always sounded so weird coming from him.
"Ryan wouldn't have kissed you twice," he explained.
"What if everything is messed up now, like with the five of us? Everything will be awkward."
"It already happened. Don't let it be awkward. Rox, talk to him and see where that goes."
"Alright, I will, but I don't know when or how," I admitted.
"Just wait for a chance when you two are alone together."
"Thanks, Finn." I stepped forward and hugged him.
"Anytime. This is what I'm here for." He hugged back.
"No wonder you guys are taking forever, you're hugging without us," Garrett said, walking in with Carter and Ryan. "Group hug!"
The guys got closer and huddled around us. They gave one huge group hug. We all pulled away, and my eyes traveled to Ryan for a brief moment.
"Are you guys crashing here tonight?" I asked. It was already one in the morning.
"Yeah," Garrett responded.
"I'll get the blankets out," I said, after handing them sweatpants. I walked out of my room and they followed.
I walked downstairs and walked over to the closet by my dad's office. I got out a few blankets and walked back to the living room. I placed the blankets on the couch for the guys to grab.
"You guys can sleep here or in one of the two guest rooms," I told them.
"I'll just sleep down here," Garrett said, and the guys agreed with him.
"Roxy, do you have extra pillows?" Carter asked.
"Upstairs in my room, just take the extras from my bed," I told him, and he walked up the stairs.
Garrett walked off into the bathroom to change. He walked out wearing the pair of sweats. He took a blanket and placed it on one of the two couches.
Carter returned with four pillows in his arms.
"I got some from the guest bedrooms." He tossed a pillow to each of the guys.
"Alright, I'm tired. Goodnight guys," I told them. "There are extra blankets in the closets, and help yourselves to anything in the kitchen. I'm out." I walked up the stairs.
I walked into my bedroom and turned off the lights. I laid down on my bed and covered myself with the sheets. I didn't fall asleep right away. I stayed in my bed, replaying the kiss or kisses in my head.
I had kissed Ryan. Well, he kissed me. The point is we kissed, and now I didn't know where that left us. It was probably stupid of me to kiss him back, but I didn't regret it one bit.
####
I didn't know what time I had fallen asleep, but when I awoke, the time on my alarm clock said four. I couldn't go back to sleep. I stayed awake in my bed, and that's when I received a text message.
Roxy?
It was from Ryan.
Ryan.
So you are awake?
No, I sometimes text in my sleep
Haha good to know. Hey, can we talk? I need to talk to you...
My heart skipped a beat, and I hesitated before responding.
Yeah, I'm in my room.
I'll be up in a sec.
I waited for Ryan. Then there was a small knock on my door. I stood from my bed and opened my door. He walked in. His hair was messy from sleeping. I walked over to my bed then sat down with my legs criss-crossed. Ryan followed and sat opposite of me, facing me. He sat with his right leg folded and his left hanging off the bed touching the floor.
"So, uh,..."
"Did all the guys fall asleep?"
He nodded his head. "Hours ago."
"You said you wanted to talk," I reminded him.
"About earlier," he started, his eyes meeting mine. "I want to apologize for that. I shouldn't have kissed you," he told me.
My heart instantly sank. My eyes looked down at my lap to avoid eye contact. I knew he didn't feel the same way about me. I knew it.
"I get it, you regret it," I said, before looking back up.
His eyes went wide. "Roxy," he started and sighed. "It's not that. I- It's that I know you might have not wanted me to do that. Roxy, I have to tell you something before I change my mind. I just need you to know," he said. "I've liked you since junior year. I have. You're so beautiful. I loved spending time with you. I even liked being your fake boyfriend sometimes because that's when I was able to hold your hand. I just knew that I couldn't tell you how I felt because I was afraid that you wouldn't feel the same way. Garrett always told me to tell you how I felt, but I never had the guts too. Maybe I should have told you before or maybe not. I don't know. So, no, I don't regret kissing you. I've been wanting to do that for quite some time now," he confessed. "I get it, if you don't feel the same way about me. I just wanted you to know how I feel about you."
I took in everything he told me. I let it sink in. He-He actually felt the same way. Ryan felt the same way about me. Finn was right, I should have told him how I felt a long time ago.
"Ryan, I..." I couldn't find the right words to explain.
"Roxy, it's fine. You don't have to feel the same way," he said. "I just wanted you to finally know. This doesn't have to change anything between us."
That's the thing though, I hoped it did change something between us. I grabbed his shirt, pulled him close to me, and kissed him. He put his arms around me and kissed back. He pulled me closer to him. It was like earlier. This kiss was just as passionate as before, if not more. When we pulled away, I sat back how I was seated before.
"Sorry," I apologized, feeling my cheeks grow warm. "Ryan, I feel the same way. I like you. I've had feelings for you since junior year, too. I was also afraid you wouldn't feel the same way, even though Finn always told me to tell you how I felt," I confessed. "You don't know, Ryan, so many times it seemed like all you wanted to do was be friends. At one point, I even told myself I had to get over you. It hurt thinking all I was to you was just one of your friends and nothing more."
He cupped my face with his hands and kissed the top of my head.
"Roxy, I'm so sorry you felt that way. I never meant to treat you like that. I actually felt the same way." He reached over to hold my hand but slowly stopped when he said, "with Brice."
I looked away. "Brice was..." I struggled to find the correct words, before meeting his eyes again. "Finn thought it was a good idea to pursue him. It was to try and get over you. When you said you liked some other girl, Finn hated seeing me sad. That's why he suggested it."
He nodded his head. "You don't even know," he chuckled. "I was so jealous of him. Especially when he kissed you on the lake."
I tore my gaze away again.
"Don't worry. You know, I always had to control myself from not kissing you or even just putting my arm around you. Just know that I do like you. I have the same feelings for you," he explained. "You know, maybe we should have listened to Finn and Garrett and just admitted our feelings towards each other a long time ago," he chuckled.
"Or maybe you should have kissed me a long time ago," I murmured.
"Maybe, I should have."
"I didn't think you heard that." I felt my cheeks heat up again.
"You know, I've always liked it when you blushed. It was always so cute," he admitted, a small smile on his lips.
"I've always liked it when you laughed or smiled. Every time you did, it always made me smile," I admitted to him. "Remember when we were going to the wedding and I asked you who you liked? Was it—" I was cut off by his answer.
"I was talking about you," he said. Every time I was talking about liking some girl, it was always you. No one else."
A yawn involuntarily escaped my lips, and I looked at the time. It was five in the morning now.
"So, uh, what do we do now?" I asked him.
"Right now you are going to go to sleep. Then we'll see what happens. I want to take this a bit slow. I don't want to rush into anything," he explained it to me.
"Alright," I agreed.
"Sleep well." He reached over and kissed my forehead.
He turned off the lights and left my room. I laid back down and soon fell asleep after that. Sleep felt so good.
I thought I had only slept for about thirty minutes, but when I woke up it was five minutes to eight. There was a bacon aroma that filled my room. I got out of my bed, put on my slippers, and made my way out of my room. I walked down the stairs into the kitchen, slowly walking, still feeling tired and sleepy.
Carter stood by the stove, cooking. He was making bacon, eggs, and sausage. Garrett and Finn were sitting at the table. Ryan wasn't around. I took a seat on one of the stools at the island and put my head down.
"Tired?" I heard Carter ask.
"Yeah," I replied and felt someone rub my back.
I opened my eyes, put my head up, and turned around. It was Ryan who was rubbing my back. I looked at him and wrapped my arms around his waist, while still sitting on the stool. I nestled my head into his torso and closed my eyes, still tired from lack of sleep.
"Uh, breakfast is ready." Carter cleared his throat.
I opened my eyes and let go of Ryan. All eyes on me.
"What? I'm tired," I told them and stood from the stool to get some plates.
I handed everyone a plate and helped Carter place the food on the table. I took out some orange juice from the fridge and placed it on the table along with some cups. The rest of us sat down at the table, and we all began eating.
I was seated beside Finn, while Ryan sat across from me. As I was eating, I noticed Finn glancing at me and then at Ryan every now and then. He knew we had talked. Finn always knew when something was going on.
"So, any plans for today?" Carter asked.
"What should we do?" Finn asked.
"A bonfire," Garrett suggested.
"We should," I agreed. "That'll be fun. We can have it here, if you guys want."
"So a bonfire? Yeah?" Finn asked, and we all agreed. "We'll have to go to the store to buy the stuff. What time do you guys want to go?"
"Six," Garrett suggested, and we all agreed.
We continued to eat. When we were all done, we cleaned up the mess. The five of us walked into the living room and began folding the blankets. Soon after, Garrett and Carter left. Finn also went home and that left Ryan and I by ourselves. I put the blankets back into the closet then carried the pillows back up to the guest room.
"Roxy?" I heard Ryan calling.
"In my room!" I shouted.
He walked in.
"I'm heading home now. I'll see you later." He walked over to me.
"Alright, see you later." I reached up and hugged him.
Ryan's eyes met mine, then he kissed me. I put my arms around his neck and he put his arms around my waist. He pulled me a bit closer to him. I had to stand a little on my tippy toes to reach better. That was new. Kissing him was amazing. I felt so secure and safe being in his arms. I just melted. We both pulled away from the kiss, but I stayed in his arms.
"So, I'll see you?" he asked me.
"Yeah, I'll walk you out."
We both walked out of my room and down the stairs. We both stopped in front of the front door. He opened the door and stood in the doorway.
"Bye." He hugged me and kissed me again.
"I don't think I'll get used to this." I smiled against his lips.
"Good." He smiled too and kissed me again. "Alright, this time, bye."
He left, and I closed the door behind him. I made my way back to the living room and the doorbell rang. I opened the door to see Ryan.
"Forget something?" I chuckled.
"Yeah, this." He wrapped his arms around me then lifted me off the ground and kissed me.
I laughed as he slowly set me back down.
####
When I got out of the shower, I combed my hair and let it air dry. I put on denim jeans, a black long-sleeved shirt, and a pair of black combat boots.
It was still early, so I decided to clean my room up a bit. I put some clothes away in my closet and put my dirty clothes in the hamper. I made my bed and cleaned my dresser top where I had random stuff.
I went downstairs and cleaned around the house. After I finished downstairs, I went back up to my room and took a nap since it was only two.
"Rox," I heard. "Rox, wake up." I felt someone moving me a little.
I opened my eyes to see that it was Finn.
"Wakey, wakey."
"What time is it?" I yawned and stretched my arms out.
"It's five fifty. I tried calling you, but you didn't answer," he told me.
I sat up immediately.
"What time did you go to sleep?" he questioned.
"It was two," I admitted.
"Are you ready to go? The guys are already at the store, I think," he told me.
"Yeah, I'm ready."
We both walked out of my room and down the stairs.
"So, what's going on with you and Ryan? I know something's happened. Did you guys already talk?" he asked, as we walked out the front door.
"Finn, you were so right." I beamed. "Let me tell you what happened," I started.