CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE-
There was no simpler way to put it.
I was screwed.
Having a crush on a player… that was reckless, that was dangerous… that was so stupid.
I couldn’t fall for him because he would surely break my heart.
“Sam?” I had just walked away from the most traumatic experience of my life. Well, not the most traumatic experience. This had to be up there though.
“Hey Fred.” I replied.
He sat down beside me on the step. “You seem upset.”
Fred was a genius but when it came to girls I always thought that he was some kind of an idiot but I guess that those tears were a clear indication of my feelings.
They just would not stop.
We sat in a silence for a long period. I don’t know how long it was but I couldn’t help but think that things weren’t meant to be like this. When you have a crush on someone... is there meant to be this much dread?
Things had been simpler with Mason. They were comfortable.
“Whenever bad things I like to imagine what I should have done.” Fred muttered. “The other day Kane purposely knocked my cafeteria tray out of my hand. He laughed and walked away… afterwards I imagined myself saying, ‘Hey Kane!’ then I’d punch him really hard and the girls would all want my attention.”
I laughed. “Well that certainly would have worked.”
Fred was staring at me with a half smile on his small lips. “What would you have done?”
I looked behind him as my mind wandered. My voice sounded distant. “Nothing. I said everything I thought.” I looked back into his eyes; his thick glasses enlarged them. Behind them I could barely make out a blue. “You shouldn’t hold back what you want to say. It only makes you more angry.”
He gave slight nod. Looking down I noticed that he was tightening his hands in his lap. “You didn’t tell me what was wrong.”
I sighed. “I realised that I have a crush on a guy who I hate.”
Fred frowned and flicked his eyes towards me. “That doesn’t make sense.”
“I know.”
“Blake isn’t as bad as the rest. He’s a nice guy a majority of the time.”
“I didn’t tell you it was Blake.” I frowned.
“I know.” He smiled. “You didn’t have to.”
We fell into another silence. Was it really that obvious?
Is it obvious to Blake?
Well… it is now. How do I fix this?
Wait. What was that thing that Caleb told me?
“Then the next day you act like nothing happened. Like you don’t want him anymore. Tell him that you’ve moved on. Tell him that you’ll find someone who’s better than him.”
An idea formed in my mind.
I couldn’t help but smile widely. Fred looked at me with a little bit of alarm from my change in mood. “What are you doing tomorrow night Fred?”
“AH MAH GAWD! SAMANTHA!” I cringed. “YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL!”
“No, I don’t. You do Soph.” I smiled and gave her a quick hug. She ate my compliment up pretty quickly.
She was like the hungry caterpillar. “Oh really! No, no I don’t!”
“She’s fishing.” Alley muttered in my ear with a smirk. She handed out a gift towards her. “Here! This is from me and Sam.”
Sophia took the present eagerly. “Aww! You didn’t have to do that!” When she was out of earshot and safely away, Alley laughed.
“I’m sure if we didn’t. She would have never let us forget it.”
“Yeah with subtle comments like, ‘what do you want for Christmas? Because I’m that type of friend who buys presents.’” I rolled my eyes. “You didn’t have to that by the way. I could have dealt with the side comments.”
“It’s alright.” She shrugged. “I don’t mind saying its from both of us.” Her eyes roamed behind me. “Have you seen Caleb?”
“Nope.” I let the ‘p’ go off with a large pop. “Have you seen Fred?”
“Fred?” She frowned. “Why would Fred be here?”
I gave her a cheeky smile. “Because I invited him.”
“Why would you-”
“Oh!” I exclaimed. “There he is!” I quickly parted through the crowd. Knocking people on the dance floor out of my way. The music became louder as I stepped into the larger part of the party. I grabbed his elbow and steered him along with me. I stopped near a large tower of stairs.
No shock there but Sophie was rich. Not that I expected any different. It seemed that everyone was except for me.
“You look really nice Sam.” Fred commented. I looked down at one of Alley’s long purple dresses. It had a pattern of purple swirls on it and touched the floor.
“Thanks.” I smiled. We both avoided eye contact and looked around the room. In the large space people were grinding and dancing up against each other.
“You invited me here to make him jealous didn’t you?” Fred mumbled in my ear.
I grimaced. “What are you talking about?”
Fred pointed across the room. Behind an amount of bodies I could see Blake laughing and dancing closely to a brunette.
My heart literally sank.
“Stevens. I don’t have some kind of crush on you. I’m sorry but I don’t. You were purely just some fun.”
I turned away. My throat was tightening rapidly. Why was this happening? Why did I choose him?
“Hey Sam!” Oliver’s hand slapped against my back. He stood close beside me as our group grew. Alley and Caleb stood hand in hand. “What’s up Fred?”
Fred smiled warily. “Nothing really.”
“What are you doing here?” Oliver asked.
“I came as Sam’s date.” Fred replied.
The red cups continents were caused to be sprayed across Fred’s face. “What?” Oliver chocked. He looked at me with bewilderment. “Your dating Fred?”
“No, we just came together as…” My voice trailed off. The image of Blake and the brunette kept popping itself in my head.
“As what?” He demanded.
Looking around the group, I noticed that everyone’s eyes were on us. Alley was staring at me with a look of pity.
Or maybe the pity was towards Oliver.
“Whatever.” I sighed. “I’m going to go get a drink.”
I zoomed through the crowd before either of them could utter another word. I knocked people out of my way as I parted. I started to stuff my face with food once I found the table.
Across the room, I could see them looking at me. Oliver looked furious… Fred looked uncomfortable… and behind them was Blake.
Another girl was beside him. He started caressing her face and grinning before speaking and kissing her.
I could imagine the words that he was telling her. Words that tricked all of them into believing that they’re the one and only for him.
How was I even fooled like them?
When did he break down my walls?
“You look angry.” I jumped at the new voice beside me. The girl smiled. “The chocolate in your hand.”
Sure enough when I looked down I noticed melted chocolate at a fist in my hand. I opened it up and stared at the contents. It almost looked like poop.
“Boy troubles?” She guessed. The girl in front of me was a blonde with bright blue eyes. She was extremely pretty with a stunning white smile. “I know that look anywhere.”
I grabbed the napkin that she handed towards me and smiled warily. “You don’t know the half of it.” I fiercely scrubbed off the chocolate. “When a guy you really like doesn’t notice you and is with out girls? Yeah it becomes a problem.”
She shrugged a skinny shoulder. “I say forget about him. If he cant notice how amazing you are then forget it.”
I gave a laugh. “I’ve known you for around 20 seconds now and you think I’m amazing?”
She smirked. “No guy is worth any trouble. Besides I already know you. You’re Samantha Stevens.”
“How do you know me?” I frowned.
“I’m Cecelia. Sophia’s family friend.” She explained. “She doesn’t shut up about anyone in her life. She likes to tell that story about her ex friend Melanie. Your name comes up a bit.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah I’m sure that that’s true.” I sighed and chucked the napkin on the table. “Usually I believe that chocolate can fix anything but I think I’ve destroyed it.”
“You should go talk to him.”
I nodded. “Yeah, I think I might just do that.” I gave her a smile. “And thanks.”
“Anytime.” She smiled back.
Blake wasn’t with the girl anymore. He was now around a group of guys in the corner of the room. They were laughing at something that he just said.
“Trust me there’s a trick to getting a bra off without a girl noticing. It takes-” His words were cut off as I grabbed his arm and pushed him towards an open space. “What the hell!” He exclaimed.
“Meet me up stairs.” I snapped.
I didn’t wait for his reaction but stormed towards the white marbled steps. I didn’t turn but heard him close behind me.
I slammed the door behind us and turned around quickly.
Blake raised his eyebrows and smiled. “You changed your mind? We could still have some fun up here.” His voice lowered. “Whatever you want to do.”
I swallowed with a dry mouth and stepped in front of him. “You disgust me. You are honestly the most self absorbed and infuriating person I have ever met. I could do a lot better than you Tyler Blake.”
His expression didn’t change. He stared at me with a levelled expression.
“Then the next day you act like nothing happened. Like you don’t want him anymore. Tell him that you’ve moved on. Tell him that you’ll find someone who’s better than him.”
This isn’t working. I’m doing this all wrong.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I felt him take a step towards me. Lightly, his fingertips trailed across my cheek. They left a fire that tingled and burned at the same time.
I wanted him. I wanted him so badly.
“You could have any guy here you know that?” His voice was low and close to my ear. I gave a shiver. “You could be with that Fred kid or Oliver… or Mason.” He paused. “Except you’re here with me.”
“You noticed me with him.” I didn’t open my eyes. My voice was barely a whisper.
“I always notice you.”
An earthquake of butterflies erupted in my stomach. I understood why girls fell for his charms… it was so easy.
The words fell easily from my lips. I felt like a broken record. “I could do a lot better than you.” It was still a low whisper. I had no idea who I was trying to convince… him or me.
“Then why don’t you Stevens?”
I snapped my eyes open and stared in him. It was only then that I realised how jealous I was of all those other girls that he’s kissed all night.
I don’t want him with anyone else.
That scared me. It scared me a lot. “Because I want you!” I yelled fiercely. My cheeks heated.
Suddenly my back hit the wall. I gave a low gasp as his lips pressed themselves to mine. I immediately responded as the fire and heat coursed through my body. Every touch felt intensified. I pressed him closer towards me and groaned.
His lips trailed to my neck and he gave a low chuckle.
“Shut up.” I mumbled. I grabbed his face in my hands and kissed him again. I felt his hand trail to the back of my dress. I pulled away and smirked. “You better not be trying to taking that off.”
He leaned away and smirked. “You know that I could.” My smile fell. I walked around him and pressed my lips together with my arms crossed. “Wow your mood just changed.”
I turned around. “Are you going to do it?”
“Do what?”
“Apologise for what you said yesterday.”
He laughed a chuckle then slowly the smile dropped. “Your serious?”
My teeth gritted together. “Yes of course I am! You hurt me Blake.”
“Yeah and you called me a selfish and inconsiderate human being.” He raised an eyebrow and frowned at me. “I made myself pretty clear Stevens. I don’t want a relationship. You knew that. It’s not my fault-”
“Stop!” I yelled. Tears were threating to spill again. “Stop.” I murmured.
His expression softened suddenly. “I’m sorry.” That was worse. I didn’t want his pity. This isn’t how this was meant to work out. He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry that I don’t feel the same way that you do.”
That seemed to do it.
My legs crumbled from out of me. I landed on the floor in a heap.
FOR CRYING OUT LOUD WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME?!
Suddenly arms wrapped themselves around me. I couldn’t help but lean against him. They tightened around me. “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry.” He mumbled into my hair. “Sam?” I looked up at him. The tears were still threatening to spill. “Look at us.”
“What do you mean?”
“We flirt together, we kiss and then we fight. Sometimes it’s the other way around. Were not good together Stevens. You know that.”
“I should go.” I muttered. I pulled myself away abruptly.
“Sam-”
I slammed the door behind myself. I didn’t look back but rushed from the party. The sound of the music was still heard from the parking lot.
I stopped in the middle of street. My heart was hammering and my cheeks were flushed.
I was such an idiot. I can’t believe I just did that.
I stayed where I was, breathing in the fresh air. My hands were shaking at my sides.
“Hey Stevens!” I turned around and found Aiden walking towards me. “I thought that was you.” He chuckled. “I haven’t spoken to you in a while.”
“You mean before or after you started being a dick to one of your closest friends?” Yeah I wasn’t in a good mood.
“If you’re referring to Caleb then that boat has sailed a long way.” He smirked. “What happened between you and Blake? You have the hots for him?”
“It’s none of your business.”
“Well, if it’s experience you want.” He took another step towards me. Suddenly a hand came out and pushed him away.
“Go back inside.” Blake snapped.
“Hey man.” Aiden laughed. “I was just having a little bit of fun.”
“Go.”
“Fine.”
I locked eyes with Blake as soon as he started to walk away. “What?” I said sharply. “Do you want to hurt me more?”
He didn’t respond to my question. “Come on, I’ll take you home.” When I didn’t move he sighed. “I’m guessing that you came with Alley? She’s still inside. If you want you go back inside then go.”
“No. I don’t want that.”
I don’t want her to see me upset.
I followed him in silence towards his car. I stopped beside it as he dug out his keys from his jeans.
The car gave a loud beep and I opened the door. The first thing I noticed were the blankets on the back seat and the pillow.
I turned towards him to find him already looking at me. “Have you been living in your car?” I demanded.
He took a while to respond by slowly reversing then changing the station. “Yeah. My parents kicked me out.”
“Why? When?” He didn’t look at me. Something occurred to me then. Blake’s mother’s cold voice sounded through my head. “You can have anyone else in this town you want Blake. But I swear to God if I see you with her again… well you wont have anywhere else to go. That girl is cheap and disgusting.”
“Was it after your party when I stayed over?” I asked quietly.
I felt him look at me. “Yeah it was.”
“So it’s my fault.”
“They found out that I had still been hanging around with you. They didn’t like it and told me that I should leave. But it was a whole lot of other things. It’s a miracle that I’ve survived them for so long.” He gave me a sidelong look. “Don’t worry, it’s not your fault. It was just the last straw before I could take it any longer.”
I looked over my shoulder at the poor attempted bed. Does he even fit there? “You can stay at my house.” I blurted out.
“What?”
“My mum wouldn’t notice. She’s hardly ever home. It would be a lot better then you sleeping here.”
He didn’t look at me. “I can’t do that to you.”
“I insist. I feel responsible.” I held up a hand and warned. “Don’t. You can’t argue with me on this.”
He gave a low chuckle. “Alright Stevens.”
I pushed down the button for the window to go down and closed my eyes as the wind hit my face.
That wasn’t his normal chuckle. It sounded wary. As though he didn’t feel like this was a good idea.
That made the two of us.
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