WARNING: Chapter may give you the feels. You've been warned! 😊
Also: TRIGGER WARNING-mentions feelings of self harm, trigger section will be mentioned before, feel free to skip!
Thank you.
{Gerard's POV}- I time skipped a little bit. SUFFER! JK, sorry!
I couldn't believe it! Tomorrow was mine and Frankie's one month anniversary! We've been together for a whole month! I was so happy, Bob said I had never talked so much in my life. Ray told him to shut up and enjoy it while it lasts. Mikey was just happy for me. He said he hadn't seen me so happy in years, and he was glad. Frankie didn't say anything about it. He was probably planning on surprising me with something, so I didn't push the matter. I couldn't contain my excitement, however, which is why I am currently kissing my Frankie in the school courtyard, not giving a million craps who is there to see. It's after classes, and we decided to just chill there since Mikey had had to go to the library. We were going to leave in a few minutes, hopefully to enjoy this lovely Friday. "God, Gee, why are you so happy today?" he asked, laughing and planting a small kiss on my lips. I smiled mischievously and said, "I don't know, Frankie, just in a good mood. What about you?" He wrapped his arms around my waist. "As long as I'm with you, I'm always in a good mood." He said, kissing my nose playfully. "I love you, Frankie. Soooo much!" I said. "Love you, too." he said. Bob, Ray, and Mikey were all giving us nasty looks and teasing us and stuff. I stuck my tongue out at them, and we all broke out laughing. "You guys are so gross! Seriously, get a room!" Bob teased. "Shut up, Bryar! Least I kiss actual people instead of making out with myself in the mirror." I taunted. The others all died of laughter. "Whatever." Bob muttered, rolling his eyes. "Ah, come on, Bob. You know I'm messing around with you!" I laughed, lightly punching his arm. Frankie threw his arm around me, and I leaned into it comfortably. We all seemed to just stay there, like that, for a moment in peaceful, relaxing silence.
But of course, we are in high school. We are a bunch of freaky, emo, wierdos who like boys and/or do not talk, so of course, peaceful and relaxing silence is a luxury we are not free to enjoy. I am reminded of this as I hear laughter and someone shout, "What's so funny, freaks?!" We all look up and see Brunner's gang, except something is different this time. There's a different face. "Bert?! What are you doing?!" Ray asked, stepping forward. The rest of us watched carefully. I felt Frankie's grip around me tighten in a protective gesture. "Aww, that's cute. Little Frankie wants to protect his little boyfriend. How precious!" Bert taunted, making Brunner and his goons laugh and me to roll my eyes. Bert must have caught me, though, because he looked at me all angry and said, "What?! You got something to say, mute?!" He screamed, moving closer and closer to us. I froze, eyes wide and mouth parted in shock. That was one of the things he said to me that night. I was going to say something to him, but I'd stopped before. When he saw I was going to talk, he'd shouted those exact words. Now, he smiled at me as the memory sank in. "Oh, yeah. You got something to say, Mute?!" He asked again, a little louder than before. I jumped a little, and Frankie looked at me in concern. "Gee, what's wrong?" he asked in concern. I just nodded, still a little dumbstruck by the words. "Why don't you just talk to me, huh, baby? You trust me, right?" he asked. He was really scaring me now. Those were all words he'd said that night. What scared me even more was that he was saying it all in order, like he was reading from a script. He looked at me with a big grin as he seemingly read my thoughts. "Yeah, you remember all of this, huh, Gee? You know exactly what I'm doing, and it's scaring the crap out of you. You never told anybody, did you? Never told your dear baby brother, or your best friends...or your boyfriend?! Should I tell them for you?" he asked. I quickly shook my head. "Oh, but why not, baby? They deserve to know how you cried as I beat the crap out of you, begging me to leave you alone. You cried like a little girl, because you couldn't take a beating like a man!" he mocked.
Frankie looked at me in shock. "Gee? Did he...hit you?" he asked. I looked at him, tears threatening to fall from my eyes. He knew the answer then, and that was all he needed. Frankie, my small, little elf of a boyfriend, walked right up to Bert and socked him in the jaw. Bert wheeled around, his hand moving up to his jaw. Frankie scowled and said, "If I ever even hear that you put a finger on Gerard, I swear to God, you will pay, do you understand me? You leave us alone, now!" He said. Actually, said is an understatement. He growled! Bert backed up a little, but laughed anyways. "What are you gonna do, freak?" He asked. Frank gave him the death glare to kill the term "Death Glare" for good. "You do not want to find out. Now, I'm going to say it again. Listen loud and clear. Leave. Us. ALONE!" Frankie screamed. Bert's eyes widened, along with those of Brunner and his gang. Mikey, Bob, Ray, and I stared in shock and amazement, and a little fear. I had never seen Frank like this, but man was he scary when he wanted to be. Bert scoffed and shrugged his shoulder, shoving his hands in his jeans pockets.
TRIGGER WARNING!!!
"You guys are such a waste of time. Why don't you just go kill yourselves, do us all a favor? Hey, Gee, keeping those razor blades shiny?" He asked. I gasped, suddenly feeling a little lightheaded. "Gee? Don't listen to him! Gee!" Mikey shouted to me, but I wasn't listening. All I could think was 'Razor Blade...Razor Blade...' I used to have those kinds of thoughts when I needed to self-harm. No, No, I couldn't be having those thoughts now. "Bert, get OUT OF HERE!" Frankie shouted. People were looking at us now. Bert smiled at me, seeing that his job had been done, and led the bullies away.
WARNING OVER, THANK YOU.
Frankie glared at all of the people staring at us, and they immediately turned away. He saw me as I slowly slid down the wall to the ground. He and Mikey knelt down in front of me, Ray and Bob standing close behind. I hit the sides of my head with my fists, trying to get those evil thoughts out of my head. "Mikeeey!" I whined. He held his arms out, and I slid into them. "What's wrong, Gee? You look a little sick." He said cautiously. "I...I feel like...like I need to..." I stuttered, not being able to say the words. They all seemed to understand what I meant, though. Mikey cupped my face in his hands and smiled.
"Listen to me. You never have to do that again. It won't help you, Gee. We will help you. You don't need to hurt yourself. Understand me?" he asked. I nodded, but still felt sick. Frankie came over and knelt beside Mikey. "Baby, are you okay?" he asked. I gulped and nodded, holding my hand out. He helped me to my feet, then pulled me into a tight hug. "I am so sorry. I didn't know Bert scared you that bad. We'll keep you safe from him, I promise." He said. I nodded and pulled away. Then, I leaned in and planted a kiss on his lips. He smiled and pushed back a little harder. I pulled away with a smile on my face The others all made faces. "Seriously, a room. Get one." Bob said in a sort of threatening tone. We all laughed. "How about we go hang at our place?" Mikey asked. We all agreed and went to my car, taking our normal seats- me driving, Mikey in Passenger, Frankie behind me, Bob in the middle, and Ray behind Mikey. I pulled into our house and we all got out and went inside. "Hey, Gee, can I talk to you for a minute?" Frankie asked. "Sure." I said, a bit suspiciously. His tone didn't sound good, and it was making me wonder what was wrong. I quickly skimmed through everything I had done wrong lately as I followed him into the kitchen, and I couldn't think of anything I would have done to make Frankie mad. "What's up?" I asked when we were out of earshot from the others. "Are you okay?" he asked. I was confused. I mean, nothing had really been wrong in the first place, not counting Bert bringing back all of those horrible memories. "Yeah, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" I asked, cracking a grin that I'm pretty sure even Frankie could tell was fake. He put his hands on my shoulders and looked deep into my eyes. God, his eyes were beautiful- two beautiful, amazing deep hazel brown orbs, so similar to my own. "Gee, baby, please just be honest with me. Mikey told me that Bert used to hit you, but I need to know- how bad did he hurt you?" he asked. I could feel the pain in his voice. I felt how difficult it was for him to ask me that question.
I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. Man, I really needed to wash it. "Gee?" he asked. I looked back at him, realizing that I had zoned out. "I asked you a question. How bad did he hurt you? How many times did he do it?" He asked, getting closer and closer to tears. I cupped my hands in his face and kissed his lips with as much passion as I could give. I pulled away when I felt some sort of wetness on my face, and realized he was crying. "Listen to me, okay? It doesn't matter how many times or how bad he did what he did. What matters is that I am here with you, safe and sound. And that I love you more than you could ever know, more than you could ever imagine." he said. Frankie gave me a stupid look and said, "I know. I know, and I love you, too. So much. But, Gee, I need to know. Please, just...give me that. Just please let me know. This is going to kill me." he begged. He was actually begging me. "Frankie...please. Please don't make me relive that! I...I don't know...if I can..." I stuttered, feeling myself starting to cry. "Hey. Baby, hey, it's okay. Listen to me, we don't have to talk about this now, but eventually I'm going to go crazy. Knowing that Bert hurt you in any way, and not knowing how bad the damage was, it is killing me, Gee!" he admitted. I pulled him into a hug, rubbing my hand around in circles on his back. "I know, baby. I know. And I promise, as soon as I feel...a little better about talking...we'll talk, okay?" I said, trying to stop crying. One of us needed to be strong, and it clearly wasn't going to be Frankie. He nodded and said, "Alright. Alright, that's fine." Frank agreed. I looked into his eyes and wiped away the tears with my thumbs. He smiled and pressed his lips against mine. We stayed in a tight embrace for a few minutes before coming up for air. "God, I love you so much." he said. "I love you, too." I said, pressing our foreheads together for a moment before someone cleared their throat behind us, making me jump. "Ow!" Frankie cried as I headbutted him. The two of us laughed, rubbing our heads to get rid of the pain. "Sorry. What's up?" I said to Mikey, who was standing in the kitchen doorway. "Well, it's getting late, so I offered to let Ray and Bob stay over. Ray said it's not a problem for him, but Bob's mom wants him to go home. I called Mom, too, and she doesn't care. Is Frank staying over?" he asked, smiling. Frankie looked at me and shrugged, pulling his phone out of his pocket. "I wouldn't mind staying here. Just let me ask my mom." he said, dialing his mom's number.
Frank's mom said it was fine if he stayed over. "Hey, Mikes, tell Bob I'll drive him home. We can stop at Ray's and Frank's houses and let them grab some stuff." I said. Mikey nodded and left the room to give Bob and Ray the message. Frankie looked at me with a smile on his face. "What?" I asked. "Mikey and Ray? Mikey seemed pretty happy that Ray was staying over, don't you think?" he asked, his smile widening. I stared at him, then burst out laughing. "Really? You think that Ray and Mikey are together?!" I asked. "Well, maybe not together, but there's definitely something there. I don't know how serious they are, but they definitely have something." Frankie pointed out. I nodded, and started humming something. Frankie wrapped his arms around my waist. My humming gradually slowed and came to a stop as I turned my head to look at him. "What was that? That song you were just humming?" He wondered. "I don't know, just something I've heard before." It wasn't a lie. That song did sound very familiar to me, but I couldn't quite figure out where I had heard it from. Mikey, Ray, and Bob came walking into the room, smiling when they saw us. "We get it, you love each other. You don't need to show us just how much." Ray teased, putting his hands on his hips and shifting his weight to his left side. I gasped, my hand flying to my chest in dramatic shock. "Excuse me, Raymond, but I am the sassy one around here, not you!" I cried. Ray corrected his posture, smiling at me, and held his hands up in surrender. "Oh, yeah. I know, Gee. You are the one and only Sass Master." he admitted, clearly thinking that that was one of the weirdest things he'd ever said in his life. I copied his pose from earlier, except doing it about a gazillion times better, and said, flashing one of my award-winning smiles, "You know it!' The three of them all rolled their eyes and laughed. Frankie pressed a kiss to my cheek. "Alright, I've gotta get going." Bob said. I grabbed my car keys, left a note for mom to let her know where we were going, and followed the others out to my car, making sure to lock the front door.
We all climbed into the car, except this time Mikey took Frank's usual place in the back seat. We all gave him questioning looks, but he just looked at me and said, "Sit with your boyfriend. It's cool." I smiled and sent him a silent 'thank you.' He returned the smile and took his seat in the back, right next to Ray. Bob smiled and took the seat behind me. I started the engine and pulled out of the driveway. We kept the radio on, loud as always, as we drove to Bob's house. I pulled into his driveway and unlocked the doors for him to get out. "I'll probably drive over tomorrow, keep Mikey and Ray company tomorrow. Later!" he called as he walked up to his front door and went inside. I locked the doors again and drove down to Ray's house. He quickly ran inside and grabbed a different shirt and a fresh pair of jeans and his toothbrush, then came back out and got back in the car. Frank took a little longer at his house, and he came out with a backpack. "What do you have in there?" Ray wondered. Frankie shrugged and said, "Nothing much. Just my clothes and toothbrush." Ray gave him a disbelieving look, but just moved past it. We drove home and found Mom and dad in the kitchen with four boxes of pizza. "Hey, guys. We heard you were having friends over, so your father picked me up from work, and then we went to pick up some pizza. We got cheese, mushroom, pepperoni, and sausage. Help yourselves!" Mom cheered. We all rushed to the cabinets and grabbed plates, then started grabbing pizzas. I grabbed a slice of sausage and a slice of mushroom (Ignore if Gee doesn't actually like/eat these things, it's fiction and I'm kinda just going off of what I do because I don't know what he does. I love sausage and mushroom pizza!). Ray ate a couple of sausage pizzas and a pepperoni. Mikey had some mushroom and some regular cheese. Frank had only cheese. He had told me he was a vegetarian, so I didn't push it. He didn't care that any of us ate meat, he just refused to eat it himself.
We watched movies for a few hours. I yawned during one part of a movie. My eyelids were getting heavier. "Aww, you tired baby?" Frankie asked, putting an arm around me and pulling me into his side We were laying across a blanket on the floor, propped up on a bunch of pillows from mine and Mikey's rooms. "Yeah. I think I'm going to go lay down in my room." I said, getting up and heading to my room in the basement. I didn't notice Frankie had followed me until I saw him standing in the doorway a few minutes later. "What are you doing down here?" I asked, smiling tiredly. He moved across the room and threw himself onto my bed. "I just wanted to lay down with my beautiful boyfriend. Is that such a problem?" he asked innocently. I laughed and laid down beside him. "No, except my parents and brother, and Ray, are all in the house with us, and they could take that the wrong way." I reminded him. He turned on his side to face me. "Come on. Nothing like that. I just want to cuddle. Pleeeaase?!" he begged, popping out his lower lip to make a pout. I groaned, but smiled. "Fine." I said. He smiled and spread out his arms. I shuffled over until I was wrapped comfortably in his arms. "Gee, can I ask you a question?" Frankie asked. I hummed a yes. I was really comfortable, and I was starting to doze off. "Do you trust me?" He asked. "Of course, Frankie. Why would you ask that?" I wondered. "No reason, really. It just seems like you don't like talking to me. But, don't worry about it. I'm getting kind of tired. We can talk more later. Goodnight, Gee." He said, running his hand up and down my back. He sounded kind of sad. "Goodnight, Frankie. I...I love you, too." I said. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.
"Why don't you just talk to me, you worthless piece of crap!" He shouted. I stood up and faced him, hands balled into fists and a furious expression on my face. He smirked and said, "What? You got something to say, Mute?!" I flinched away. He had never called me 'mute' before. My silence was never a problem before. His smirk widened, like he could sense the fear. He moved up close to me, until there was only mere centimeters between us. "Why don't you just talk to me, huh, baby? You trust me, right?" He asked. I swallowed and backed away slowly. He reached out and grabbed the collar of my black t-shirt, getting up in my face. "Why won't you just talk to me, you freak?!" he shouted, shoving me backwards. Thankfully, I managed to catch myself before I fell. I was burning hot from the anger at this point, and I needed to let it all out. "WHY DON'T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE?" I shouted. As soon as the words came out, my eyes widened and my hands flew to my mouth. I wasn't supposed to talk to Bert, let alone talk back or shout at him. He quickly grew furious and came at me, swinging his fists and kicking his feet. I got kicked and punched in the face, stomach, sides, legs, and just about everywhere he could get to. I kept screaming, but he didn't stop.
{Frank's POV}
I was jolted awake by somebody screaming. I looked beside me to see Gerard rolling around, crying in his sleep. He wasn't saying anything, just screaming and crying. "Gee? Gee, baby, wake up. It's just a bad dream. Gerard?" I asked, shaking him over and over. His screams were starting to make me nervous. I shook him a little harder. I was really nervous, he wouldn't wake up. "Gerard, wake up!" I shouted, and he finally jolted out of his deep sleep. "F-Frankie? What happened?" he asked. "You-You were having a bad dream. You were screaming and crying. Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?" I asked carefully, not wanting to upset him. He shook his head and ran a shaky hand through his hair. I nodded and snuck a quick glance over at the clock sitting on his bed-12:15. "Hey, Gee?" He looked up at me, still a little nervous from his nightmare. I cupped his beautiful face in my hands and pressed a kiss to his lips, making sure that it was filled with all the love I had for him. Finally, I pulled away and looked back into those beautiful, Hazel eyes of his. "Happy Anniversary, baby." I said. He smiled and repeated the words.