5/22/15
"OKAY, RIGHT THIS way ladies!" Helen chirps.
My mother, Bailey, and I are back at the bridal store I Do. But this time we are here for Bailey to pick her dress. Bailey's been in a panic all day about having to pick her dress. She says she narrowed it down at the beginning of the summer before we all came down, but she just can't choose between the three left.
I've never understood woman and their need to have the "perfect dress" on their wedding day. It's a dress we wear for one day, and yet we are supposed to spend thousands on the stupid garment. Ugh, and all the crying that's involved with finding "the one" I hate it. How can a dress make a woman cry? Call me a cynic, but I find everything about weddings annoying and trivial. I used to be one of those girls who planned her wedding to the last little element, but that all changed years ago.
Helen walks us towards a large couch, and leads Bailey into the dressing room that sits in front of us. Before Helen pulls the curtain closed, Bailey shouts, "Now I want you all to be honest okay? I want Cale to cry the moment he sees me." She smiles at her words.
"Romantic," I rumble with a sigh. Helen pulls the curtain closed and the sounds of zippers and rustling fabric is all that is left to hear.
"Are you okay Gray?" My mother's voice questions to my left.
I turn to face her. "Why would you ask that?"
She purses her lips and shrugs. "I don't know, you've been a little weird the last couple days."
I nod in agreement, because I have been weird the last few days. Chase and I have texted a few times. I've barely talked to Kylie besides a little today. And Hayley has been too busy to talk for the last week. I feel alone and I hate it. Bailey only comes over sometimes, and if she does it's with Cale. So I can't even have one on one time with my sister. My parents have immersed themselves into the wedding planning, and I've never felt so left out.
I'm leaving Cale in the past, but that doesn't mean I want to help my sister plan her wedding to a man I once loved. To a man who crushed me beyond repair.
I chew on my lip. "I just don't want Bai to make a mistake with all of this," I say. And it's the truth. I don't want her to rush into something that can end badly. Cale hurt me in a way that I would never wish on anyone else, especially my sister.
"It is fast Gray, but she seems so in love," my mother smiles. "I've never seen her so happy, and Cale the way he looks at her—"
I cut her off, "Like she's the first shooting star he's ever seen." The words leave my mouth before I can stop them. I blush as I say those words. It's been years since I've muttered them.
My mother makes a face at my words, but nods slowly in agreement. "Yeah, he looks at her just like that," she mumbles suddenly deep in thought.
We sit in silence for a few minutes before the curtain finally slides open to reveal Bailey. All I can see is sparkle, sparkle, and more sparkle. She shuffles out of the room, resembling a waddling duck. Helen helps her onto the small round platform so she can face herself in the large three-way mirror.
The mermaid silhouette hugs her tightly, a little too tightly honestly. Her breasts are about to pop out of the low cut sweetheart top, and every single inch of the dress is filled with sparkling stones.
The dress looks tacky.
"Bai I think the guest might go blind looking at that," I say motioning to the awful dress that sticks to her body.
"Grayson," my mother says harshly as she gives me a pointed look.
I open my mouth in protest. "I'm sorry, but do you see what she is wearing?" I ask seriously.
Bailey rotates on the platform. Her body teetering side-to-side reminds me slightly of a toddler learning how to walk. Bailey faces me, "Gray I understand how you wouldn't get this dress." I raise a brow at her words. "It's expensive and glamorous and everything the Hasting family would love. I can't just walk down the isle in some plain white dress, what would they think of me," Bailey says with a small dismissive chuckle.
I roll my eyes at her words, but say nothing more even though I want to. Cale always hated anything and anyone over the top, or ostentatious. He always made remarks about how beautiful I looked without makeup, or how cute I was in a simple sundress. Cale loved simplicity. But maybe he's changed, and Bailey is right. Maybe she has too look expensive-more like gaudy-to look the part of a Hasting.
"I think what Gray means Bai, is that you don't have to look a certain way for anyone. You pick what you feel comfortable in," my mother says.
Bailey shakes her head. "It doesn't matter what I want. I'm high society now, which means it matters what other people think." Bailey looks at herself one last time in the mirror before Helen helps her off the platform. "I like it, but I'll try on the other two for you guys before we make any real decisions." Bailey waddles off into the changing room once again with Helen following behind her.
I cross my arms across my chest, and scoff lightly at what just happened with Bailey.
"Gray, don't even go there," my mother chides. "Bai's very nervous about marrying Cale and taking on the Hasting name, and she thinks she has to act a certain way. She will learn in time where her place is and who she wants to be." My mother while strict has always been supportive of us and very wise. She knows what to say, and when to say it. I know no matter what Bailey will always be herself, even if it takes some time adjusting to the Hasting lifestyle.
I nod at my mother's words. I know she's right, but at the same time I can't help but be slightly pissed at Bailey for her words. I know the Hasting's are high society here in Easton, but that doesn't mean she needs to act above our family name. Our family is well known and liked in Easton. And for her to act as if my mother and I know nothing, or wouldn't understand high society events really hurts.
"It's just fast mom, I think Bai is throwing herself into this relationship too soon," I say truthfully. "And I feel like everything is going to crumble and fall before she even realizes it." I would never want my sister to get hurt, but having her hurt by the same man who hurt me would be devastating.
My mother pushes her dark hair behind her ears, and settles back into the couch. "I don't know Gray. It is fast, but I can't say much about it. Your father and I only knew each other six months before we got engaged." I beam at my mother's words. When I was younger I used to make my parents tell me how they met all the time. Their story was like a fairytale, and made me want to find that fairytale love also. Which I thought I found one summer with Cale, but love isn't a fairytale I realized. It's hard, and something a couple has to work at every single day.
I naw on my lip in thought before answering. "Yes, but you also waited until you graduated college to get married," I point out. Bailey technically has a semester left of school, because she put off her gen-eds until the last minute. It's not much, but I guess Bailey was one to never want to really work after school. She never talked about having a career after college, only about starting a family. So I guess she got what she always wanted, her MRS degree.
My mother nods at my words. "True, but your father and I were at the same place in life back then. Cale is older and already gradated college, and has a great career with his father's company. So he is in a different place in life."
"Yeah, I guess," I half-heartedly admit.
Suddenly the curtain whips open, and Bailey comes out in the same sparkly over the top dress that she was in before. She has a veil in her hair, and tears in her eyes.
"What happened to the other dresses?" I ask confused.
She shakes her head. "No, I can't. This is it. This is the dress I want to get married in." She smiles as tears continue to fall down her cheeks.
My mother stands and quickly hugs her. "Oh you look amazing honey, Cale will fall in love with you all over again when he sees you in this dress." Bailey nods in agreement as she begins to fan her face. I resist the urge to roll my eyes.
Bailey makes her way over so she is standing right in front of me. Her dark hair frames her beautiful face, and the too tight dress hugs her like a glove. Even with it's tackiness the dress looks beautiful on her. The truth is everything looks beautiful on Bailey. Her blue eyes lock on mine, the smile on her face so bright it's almost as blinding as her dress. I've never seen her smile so bright and true.
"You really love him?" I ask as I swallow the lump in my throat.
She nods with a small hiccup. "Yes, so much."
I wet my lips. "And you really want this life with him?"
She nods once again, and I step forward and wrap my arms around her petite body. A small tear escapes my eyes, and trails down my cheek. "Then as long as you're happy, I'm happy Bai," I mutter honestly.
I release her and take a step back to really look at her dress once more. "You look beautiful. You'll blow Cale away in that dress," I smile.
I wipe away at the lingering tear hating how real this wedding seems all of the sudden. But if Bailey is truly happy than that is all I can ask for. If Cale is what makes her happy, than I'm happy for her, no matter what I may feel for Cale. He once looked at me as if I was his shooting star, but he killed the star that once lingered in the sky. Bailey is his new shooting star, and I hope she stays in the sky long enough to really make a life for herself with Cale Hasting. I never want Bailey to hurt like I did all those years ago. If it takes my pain to create her happiness then I will accept that role.
I take a step away from everyone, and turn to grab my phone as it makes a small chirp sound alerting me to a text. I see a text from Kylie.
Sorry I've been busy these last few days, but r we still on for tonight's bday festivities?
A breathy sigh of relief escapes my lips as I type, Yes please!
I turn to see Bailey and my mother hugging again with tears in both of their eyes. I can hear Bailey say, "Like this dress looks so high society." I shake my head.
I then add, I need a drink asap!
I need to forget about everything for one night and let loose. And tonight seems like the night to do that.