Chapter 21
Kimberley stood motionless, eyes closed, leaning onto the wall, feeling the wind blow her hair into her eyes and onto her face.
She slowly breathed in the salty air, waiting for her heart to stop racing. As it gradually returned to its normal rhythm she opened her eyes and looked out at the sea. There was nothing there - no boats, no windsurfers. For miles she could see nothing but open sea.
Backing away slightly from the wall she focussed on what she could see nearby. No neighbouring houses overlooked their villa, but suddenly she heard laughter and looked down at the beach below to see a small group of people playing volley ball.
Turning herself around slowly she looked at the kitchen and leaned back against the wall. For the first time she raised a hand and pushed the hairs out of her face. She took in a long deep breath, feeling her lungs expand and then let it out slowly, briefly closing her eyes again.
After a few seconds she opened them again and pushed herself off the wall and in the direction of the kitchen. Once she was inside, she quietly slid the doors shut and made her way towards the living room.
As she entered the hallway her eyes fell on Cheryl, still sat on the bottom step with her head leaning on the marble banister, eyes closed. Kimberley stopped in the doorway and looked at her. Cheryl sensed her presence and opened her eyes, staring back at Kimberley and holding her gaze. For a while neither of them spoke, both of them rooted to the spot and unsure as to who should speak first.
Without moving Kimberley spoke first. “Ashley’s contesting the divorce”. She watched for Cheryl’s reaction.
Cheryl frowned slightly. “No. He’s accepted blame, that’s all sorted”.
Kimberley shook her head slowly. “Nothing was signed. After we went public he had a re-think. He’s naming you as the responsible party in the marriage break-down. His lawyers are saying that your relationship with me destroyed your marriage –he wasn’t unfaithful, because technically the marriage was already over”.
Cheryl’s frown gave way one to an expression of shock. “What? No! He can’t do that”.
Kimberley nodded slowly. “He can – and he has”.
Cheryl stared at Kimberley for a few seconds then stood up, shaking her head. “No, no, there’s got to be some sort of mistake. He cheated on me. I was never unfaithful – you and me, we waited”, and she had already started making her way to the living room.
Kimberley followed her inside and watched her sit at the table. She leaned against the door frame. “Prove it”.
Cheryl looked up at Kimberley and frowned. “Prove what? You were there remember? Or at least I’m hoping you remember”.
Kimberley shot Cheryl a look. “Of course I remember. And I know we waited. But the press has spent months printing pictures of us holding hands, kissing, sharing little moments – right from practically the very start. How do we prove that all of that turned into something more only this year?”
Cheryl stared at Kimberley as things finally became clearer in her head and she lifted a hand and ran it through her hair. When she spoke her voice came out quiet, unsure. “What do I have to do – write a statement?”
Kimberley laughed and walked over to the sofa, sitting herself on the edge and clasping her hands together. “We could both get called to give evidence before a judge”.
Cheryl’s mouth opened in shock. “In court? Both of us? What the f*ck?”
“He’s named me as a third party. So if this doesn’t get settled beforehand, we could both end up giving a statement in court”. Kimberley folded her arms.
Cheryl shook her head. “He knows how I feel about going to court. I can’t bear the thought of it…” she looked up at Kimberley. “What does Hilary say – how do I settle before it gets to that?”
Kimberley brought her knees up on the sofa to her chest and hugged them, resting her chin on her knees. “You admit you cheated first – pushed him away. I don’t know what would happen money-wise, but you would accept that in the divorce papers - and whatever the press made of it”.
“And have him looking like the poor wronged husband? He can just f*ck right off. What other options are there?” Cheryl ran a hand through her hair again.
Kimberley looked down at the floor. “Either maintain a dignified silence and let him have his day in court, or hit back in the press – and let him have his day in court”.
“And?” Cheryl impatiently prompted Kimberley for another option.
Kimberley looked up and shrugged. “That’s it – they’re the options. Unless we lie and officially admit on your divorce papers that you’ve been cheating on him for well over 18 months, it will end up before a judge.” Kimberley carefully avoided using the word “court”.
Cheryl put her head in her hands. “Kimberley, I can’t stand up in another court – not after last time…”
Kimberley heard Cheryl’s voice start to crack and although she couldn’t see Cheryl’s face, she knew the tears weren’t far away. She stood up quickly and walked to the table, pulling a chair close to Cheryl’s and taking hold of her arms. “Come on,” she said soothingly, pulling Cheryl to her.
Cheryl allowed Kimberley to pull her into her own body, and rested her head on her shoulder, closing her eyes gratefully and allowing Kimberley to support her body weight. Kimberley wrapped her arms around Cheryl and hugged her tightly, kissing her face several times then resting her own face against Cheryl’s.
“What am I supposed to do?” Cheryl mumbled quietly.
“I don’t know,” admitted Kimberley, equally as quietly. “I don’t think lying on legal documents is a good idea, and besides – if you admit adultery it’s gonna end up in every paper and every magazine – we’d get slaughtered by the press. They supported you when he cheated the first time – imagine if they were to think that you’d already cheated on him. Hilary would kill you – the negative press would be unthinkable, and it might impact on the band. Plus, I’d end up looking like some evil adulterer and that’s not exactly appealing”.
Cheryl listened intently without lifting her face up. “But court, Kimberley…”
“Well, if we get him to back down, it won’t get that far,” said Kimberley, gently stroking Cheryl’s arm.
Cheryl pulled away slightly and lifted her head up to look at Kimberley. “Then we make him back down. How do we do that?”
Kimberley looked down briefly at the table then back up at Cheryl, tears already forming in her eyes. Cheryl instantly raised a hand and cupped Kimberley’s face. “What?” She lowered it and squeezed Kimberley’s arm.
“Hilary said one option would be to tell all - do an exclusive. Explain how long we’ve really been together – why we weren’t together before that, how happy we are now. Be so honest and frank that he’d have to back down to avoid being crushed financially at court”. Kimberley’s voice trailed off.
Cheryl slowly lifted a hand back up to Kimberley’s face and stopped a tear from falling. She didn’t need Kimberley to say anymore. “And you can’t bear the thought of doing it”.
Kimberley shook her head as more tears found their way onto her cheek. “Being in the papers, I can deal with that – it’s fine. But Cheryl – actually inviting them in? Telling all?”
Cheryl observed Kimberley for a few seconds before tenderly wiping away some of her tears. “Is this why you went outside – because you didn’t know how to tell me all of this?”
Kimberley looked down at the floor, avoiding Cheryl’s stare as she put a hand up to wipe her own face. “Kind of…”
Cheryl didn’t respond; she waited for Kimberley to continue. Slowly Kimberley looked up and swallowed hard.
“I couldn’t tell you until I calmed myself down first. When I put the phone down all I wanted to do was shout at you – shout at you for not signing the papers before we came here, for not sorting this before we went public, for not being able to do something about it, even for marrying him in the first place”.
Cheryl frowned but allowed Kimberley to continue.
“I really am ok with the everyday press stuff. That’s not an act. But the thought of doing this kind of exclusive – letting them in, telling them everything – I don’t want that Cheryl, I never have, and I don’t think I ever could.” Cheryl said nothing as Kimberley leaned over and took a tissue from the box on the table, wiping her eyes before continuing.
“But that’s not fair on you – I didn’t want to scream at you and shout at you just because I was frustrated. This is just as hard for you. So I just wanted to get out – breathe deeply and get rid of the anger before I told you, so that I wouldn’t be mean”.
Cheryl stared at Kimberley for a few seconds then slowly took her hands in hers and intertwined their fingers. “All this sh!t is going on and you’re still putting me first. You are unbelievable”, and she lifted Kimberley’s hands to her lips, kissing both of them.
Kimberley shrugged slightly. “I didn’t want to hurt you”. A few seconds passed as they both struggled with their own thoughts, but Kimberley spoke again. “We need to work out what to do”.
Cheryl shook her head, slipping her arms round Kimberley’s waist. “Not yet – just hold me”.
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Chapter 22
“Hey babe,” sighed Cheryl, sitting down on the bed. Kimberley was in the shower and Cheryl had tired of Kimberley’s phone constantly ringing.
Nicola’s voice came anxiously over the phone. “Are you ok? I spoke to Hilary – she said to call Kimberley because you didn’t wanna speak to anyone”.
“I’m not ok,” admitted Cheryl. “Neither of us are. And he won’t be either when I get my f*cking hands on him”.
“Me and my big mouth,” said Nicola, thinking aloud. “I’m so sorry – you didn’t need this, not while you’re on holiday”.
“Nic it’s fine, it wasn’t your fault. The little t*t waited till we were out the country before he did all this – he’s the one to blame for all this.” Cheryl got up and walked over to the window, peering out at the horizon.
“Hilary told me about the divorce – she felt we all had a right to know because the cheating thing – it can…” Nicola’s voice trailed off.
“Affect the band?” Cheryl finished off her sentence for her.
“Well, yeah,” replied Nicola, “but I didn’t mean it to sound like that’s why I was ringing”.
Cheryl laughed sadly. “Babe, if me and Kimberley know anything right now, it’s that Ashley is a prick, but also that we can trust you lot – all 3 of you. I know you didn’t call because of that”.
“You sound quite calm”, observed Nicola, her surprise evident in her voice.
“I wasn’t,” admitted Cheryl. “I wasn’t coping at all when I read that article, Kimberley was the calm one while I freaked out”.
“So what changed?” asked Nicola.
“Kimberley started freaking out,” replied Cheryl, honestly. “When Hilary told her about the divorce – she freaked out. Nicola, neither of us have a clue what to do but I am gonna do everything I can to make sure Kimberley is ok”.
“So, have you no idea what you’re gonna do?” asked Nicola, tentatively.
“Well, when she comes out the shower, I’m gonna take her to the theatre like I planned. He’s not spoiling that. Then we’ll talk it through and decide what to do – probably speak to Hilary again, maybe come home early, I don’t know. But we’re going the theatre,” said Cheryl defiantly.
“If there’s anything I can do just ring me. Please” said Nicola,
“Thanks, babe. We will. Now, I’d better call Nadine – she’ll be worried. Is Sarah still away?” Cheryl moved back over to the bed and sat down next to it in front of the mirror.
“Yeah – I’ll speak to her when she’s back. Say hi to Kimberley”.
“I will. Bye Nic”, and Cheryl hung up, immediately scrolling down her contact list until she found Nadine’s name. She turned her head towards the bathroom door and was satisfied that Kimberley was still in the shower. She glanced at her watch resting on the table in front of her and then pulled at the skin under her eyes, shaking her head as she observed the dark circles already forming.
“Cheryl!” greeted Nadine. “God I’ve been worried – I’ve rung about 10 times.”
“Twelve, actually,” laughed Cheryl, although half heartedly. “Sorry babe – I just wasn’t up to answering”.
“That’s ok – I understand, I spoke with Hilary – she said that only Kimberley was answering, and that you were…well, that you were probably gonna be in touch tomorrow.”
“Did she tell you everything?” asked Cheryl, sadly.
“Yeah honey, she did”, Nadine paused a little. “I can’t believe it – I never thought he’d stoop this low”.
Cheryl sighed. “Me neither, Nadine. And I haven’t got a clue what to do – Hilary wants some sort of in-depth exclusive, which I’m not overly keen on, but Kimberley just hates the idea. You know what she’s like – it’s just not something she’d ever choose to do”.
There was another pause as Nadine gave some thought to the issue. “I know how hard this must be for Kimberley but from what Hilary said – the alternatives are no better”.
Cheryl sighed again. “The alternatives could hurt the band, Nadine. I just don’t know what to do – I feel like we’re in a corner and Ashley’s blocking our way out”.
“I’m so sorry, really I am. I just wish I could do something, but you both have to talk it through I suppose – decide what’s best all round”.
Cheryl nodded, even though Nadine couldn’t see her. “Actually, there is something you can do. I still want to take Kimberley to the theatre tonight. If I text you later can you call the nearest Thai place and get them to deliver so that it’s here not long after we get back? I was gonna check online and call them but I won’t have time now.”
Nadine smiled. “Of course I can. But not local – that place isn’t great. I’ll call a fab little place in town and get them to deliver. Just text me what you want when you’re leaving.”
“Thanks, Nadine. Listen, we’ll call you tomorrow, ok?”
“Sure, honey. Of course. Text me later – and at least try to enjoy yourselves. Bye”, and Nadine hung up, leaving Cheryl to put the phone down on the dresser and lean in to the mirror.
“And these dark f*cking circles are your fault as well, you little prick”, she muttered, pulling some concealer out of her make up bag.
Kimberley appeared in the doorway, towel drying her hair. “What are you doing that for? It’s not like anyone will see you”.
Cheryl carried on applying make up. “Well, a) I don’t want to look this sad even in the privacy of my own home, b) there are some sights a girlfriend shouldn’t see, and c) we’re going the theatre remember?”
Kimberley stopped drying her hair and stared at Cheryl. “Well a) you always look beautiful to me, b) I’ve seen you look far, farworse, and c) I don’t think so, not after today – don’t you think we should just stay in and watch tv or something”.
Cheryl stood up. “No – this was your day. It’s already been partly ruined by “he who shall not be named”, I’m not having you miss out on the show. We’d only sit and go over and over it, making ourselves feel worse. Let’s go out – watch the show, then come back for dinner and just have some “us” time”.
“We need to sort it out, Cheryl”, replied Kimberley softly.
Cheryl sighed. “I know. And we will – together. But can’t we just forget about it for a couple of hours – go out like we planned? I want to make a fuss of you, please let me”. She flashed Kimberley her best puppy dog eyes and waited for them to have the desired effect.
Kimberley smiled reluctantly. “I really don’t see how we can forget about it – even at the theatre”.
“Well, once the show starts you’ll get into it – it’ll be a good distraction,” Cheryl smiled as she realised she was winning Kimberley over.
“Are we still having thai after?” asked Kimberley, drying her hair again with the towel.
Cheryl nodded. “Yes, all sorted – Nadine’s calling them later”.
Kimberley stopped drying her hair and smiled. “And dot dot dot?”
Cheryl giggled. “I can’t think of a better distraction”, and she held her arms out to hold Kimberley, who quickly responded by walking into them and wrapping her arms round Cheryl’s waist. “I just think we need to look at it with a clear head”.
Kimberley kissed her neck. “I suppose I’d better go and get ready then”.
Cheryl nodded and watched Kimberley make her way back into the bathroom. “Oh, and you have not seen me looking far farworse. That was harsh!”
Kimberley stopped briefly and shrugged. “What can I say – I see you first thing in the morning”, and she quickly ducked as she saw Cheryl throw a pillow in her direction.
“If that’s you making a fuss of me, you can stop now!” she called as she closed the bathroom door behind her.
Cheryl smiled as she picked up her phone to call for a car to pick them up. “He will not spoil tonight” she muttered as she pressed dial on her phone and opened the wardrobe to choose what to wear.
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Cheryl turned her head and looked at Kimberley, taking in her reaction. The lead lady was singing her finale and Kimberley was totally engrossed. As the last note was belted out Kimberley started clapping enthusiastically and turned to look at Cheryl, catching her staring. She smiled.
“Glad we came?” asked Cheryl, now clapping and getting to her feet with the rest of the audience to show the cast their appreciation.
Kimberley nodded and leaned towards her, still clapping. She kissed Cheryl’s cheek then spoke clearly into her ear. “You were right”.
Cheryl beamed and leaned in to speak into Kimberley’s ear. “I love being right”.
Kimberley shook her head and laughed. “Shut up and take me home!”