Chapter 19
Kimberley stood staring at Ashley’s words on the screen in front of her, torn between reading the whole article and going upstairs to comfort Cheryl. She reasoned that Cheryl’s quick departure would mean she hadn’t read it all, so one of them may as well check the total damage. Besides, she had no idea what to say to Cheryl yet to make this better. How the hell was she going to fix this?
She put a hand onto the table and lowered herself onto a chair, still holding the phone in her other hand as she continued reading. Once she was sat down she brought her free arm round her own waist, subconsciously providing some comfort to herself, although she wasn’t the one most needing comfort.
Kimberley re-read some of the paragraphs again, almost as if she thought it might be different second time round – less hurtful. But it wasn’t. She really did wonder how Cheryl had ever fallen for Ashley in the first place, ever thought he was the “one” for her.
After a few moments she closed the internet window down and put the phone down, getting up slowly from the table and taking a deep breath. She walked to the foot of the stairs and started to make her way up them, pausing at the top to listen out for Cheryl. She heard a quiet cough sound in the bathroom and so made her way towards it, putting a hand on the open door and opening it further, immediately seeing Cheryl sat on the floor next to the toilet, facing away from her.
In that one moment Kimberley’s heart broke to see Cheryl so hurt, the sinking feeling in her chest totally taking over the anger she had been feeling until now.
“Have you been sick?” she asked simply, entering the room and quietly shutting the bathroom door behind her. They were alone in the house, but it was almost like a subconscious desire to shut the world out and protect Cheryl. She stood behind her, letting a hand gently rest on the younger girl’s head.
Cheryl shook her head without turning round to face Kimberley. “I think I still might though”.
Kimberley sighed, and without removing her hand from Cheryl’s hair she lowered the toilet lid with the other hand and moved round to sit on it. She tenderly lowered her hand to Cheryl’s face and saw tears spring to her eyes as the younger girl looked up at her.
“How could he?” asked Cheryl, lowering her gaze to the floor.
Kimberley said nothing, not removing her gaze from Cheryl’s face, ignoring the distant mumbled sound of Cheryl’s phone ringing downstairs.
Cheryl wiped a tear from her cheek before it rolled down onto her chin, and looked up at Kimberley. “I thought…” she looked down again and her voice turned into almost a whisper. “I thought I meant something to him once. I never thought he could be so cruel”.
Kimberley raised her other hand and took Cheryl’s face in both hands, a few more tears escaping out of Cheryl’s eyes and rolling over Kimberley’s hands.
“How can I face anyone?” Cheryl asked, staring at the floor. “Kimberley, how am I gonna face anyone after this? I feel so embarrassed…” Her tears flowed freer now and Kimberley tried aimlessly to wipe each of them away, stopping suddenly as Cheryl looked up and met her gaze.
“Kimberley?” she asked. “Say something”.
Kimberley bit her lip as she fought to stop her own tears from starting to flow. “I can’t bear to see you upset” she replied simply.
Cheryl stared at her girlfriend before getting up onto her knees and wrapping her arms around Kimberley’s waist, resting her head on Kimberley’s chest. Kimberley kissed her head before wrapping her arms round Cheryl’s neck and hugging her close.
“I don’t think I have ever wanted to physically hurt someone as much as I do now,” Kimberley revealed quietly, kissing Cheryl’s head again.
“I’m still going with the ball-cutting myself”, mumbled Cheryl, although neither of them laughed.
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“Hey babes,” chirped Nadine, answering her mobile from the comfort of her sun lounger.
“Nadine, where are you?” asked Nicola, the concern in her voice evident to Nadine, making her sit up straight.
“I’m at home, why? What’s wrong?”
Nicola sighed. “I’ve just f*cked up, Nadine. You might need to go and check on Chez and Kimberley – they’re not answering their phones”.
Nadine frowned and took her sunglasses off. “F*cked up how?”
“Ashley’s done an exclusive in Hello!. It’s a horrible, horrible interview, Nad. I couldn’t believe it when Lily called me. Sarah’s away with Tom, I spoke to Hillary, she said she was calling Chez so I left it a couple of hours then called to check on her and it turns out that she hadn’t answered Hillary’s calls and he had no idea about it and I had to tell her and…”
“Woah!” shouted Nadine, putting a hand up even though Nicola couldn’t see her. “Back track - you’re speaking too fast. What’s he said?”
Nicola let out an exasperated noise to match her mood. “I’m gonna send you a link to it, Nadine. I can’t bring myself to say it out loud – I might vomit, I’m so disgusted with him. I checked you know – he’s away with the team, or I’d have gone round there and told him what I thought of him”.
Nadine tutted to show her impatience. “Well, will you send it now? I’m still in the dark here”.
“Ok, I’m sending you an email now. Ring me when you’ve read it – I don’t know what to do. And Hillary’s in a meeting so I can’t ask her and like I said – Sarah’s away so I can’t speak to her and…”
“Nicola!” shouted Nadine. “Just sent the goddam email will you and we can talk about it when I know what the hell is going on”.
“Ok, bye”, agreed Nicola, hanging up immediately.
Nadine put her sunglasses back on, waiting for notification of a new email, and she took a sip from the glass on the table next to her. Less then a minute had passed when she refreshed her inbox on her phone for the fifth time and saw an email from Nicola. Opening it she began to shake her head as she read the opening paragraphs. “Oh god,” she muttered, instantly realising the reason for Nicola’s concern.
She read down, frowning at the more damaging parts, until she reached the end. Then she went back and read the worst bits again, shaking her head.
“Melody gives me what Cheryl never could… Sex with Cheryl was boring and just got worse… She was uninterested… I had to look elsewhere for the thrill she couldn’t provide… I think Cheryl turned to Kimberley because she didn’t know how to satisfy men... I tried to save our marriage – but Cheryl wasn’t enough for me”.
Nadine took one last look at the picture on screen of Ashley with his new girlfriend, smiling for the camera in the sitting room of the house Cheryl once shared with him.
Nadine closed the internet and stood up, running a hand through her hair as she scrolled down the list of contacts on her phone, looking for Hillary’s number. “You vile, vile little man”, she muttered. “Just vile”.
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Chapter 20
“Hilary, Nadine and Nic,” read out Kimberley, as she checked the missed calls on their phones.
Cheryl stepped onto the sofa and curled herself on it, hugging a cushion close. “I don’t wanna speak to anyone, Kimberley”.
Kimberley looked over and sighed sadly. “You don’t have to, babe – I will”, and she walked over to the sofa, moving Cheryl’s legs and sitting under them, bringing them down to rest on top of her own.
“I don’t want anyone talking about it. I just want it to go away,” Cheryl said, closing her eyes, as if to shut everything out.
Kimberley let her hands rest on Cheryl’s legs. “It will go away,” she promised. “But not straight away, we should talk to Hillary, see what she thinks”.
“When I think of some of the things I did – just to satisfy him,” muttered Cheryl without opening her eyes. “Cheeky b*stard”.
Kimberley didn’t respond, choosing instead to scroll down to Hilary’s number on her phone.
“I mean, some of the things he brought home and expected me to wear, and I did because I wanted him to enjoy it…”
“Cheryl!” interrupted Kimberley, squeezing her leg. “Seriously, I don’t want the details”.
Cheryl opened her eyes and looked at Kimberley. “But I don’t want you thinking I was a flop in bed or anything”.
Kimberley shook her head. “Babe, I know you’re not a flop in bed. I don’t need to know any details of… well, before”.
“I did not turn to you because I couldn’t…” Cheryl was interrupted by Kimberley again.
“Cheryl seriously, I don’t want to know what you were doing in bed with him. Do you want me to tell you what I had been doing to Justin that time he ended up with a rash?”
Cheryl pulled a face, “No!”
“Well then,” replied Kimberley, turning her attention back to the phone. “Leave the details alone then”.
Cheryl watched Kimberley playing with her phone. “Who are you calling?”
“First?” asked Kimberley. “Hillary. We need to know what to do, Cheryl. Then I’m gonna call Nic, I don’t want her worrying that she’s caused this. And then Nadine, cos she’s called 3 times, she must know something”.
Cheryl groaned. “This can’t be happening. Why, Kimberley? Why did I marry him?”
Kimberley turned to look at Cheryl and smiled, squeezing her legs. “Because you loved him. And back then he loved you. Despite what he’s saying now, he did. He was mad about you – of course he was. Then he let greed get the better of him and now he’s bitter because he’s lost you. And he’s made all this crap up because you’re happy – with me”.
Cheryl smiled sadly back at Kimberley and put a hand on top of Kimberley’s which was still resting on her leg. “And in love with you”, she added.
Kimberley smiled and nodded. “Now, are you going to kiss me? Because I think you should.”
Cheryl giggled and got up quickly, kneeling on the sofa. She took Kimberley’s face in both hands and leaned in slowly, gently kissing Kimberley’s lips and feeling Kimberley immediately respond.
Kimberley pulled Cheryl in closer to her and wrapped her arms around her waist, feeling Cheryl’s hands come round to the back of her neck.
After a few seconds more Cheryl pulled away, turning her head away from Kimberley. Kimberley opened her eyes and frowned, seeing the tears on Cheryl’s face, despite the younger girl’s efforts to hide them.
Kimberley cupped Cheryl’s face with one hand. “Hey, what’s this for?”
Cheryl shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t even know why I’m crying”.
Kimberley smiled and pulled Cheryl into her, wrapping her arms tightly around her.
They lay like that in silence for a few minutes until Cheryl’s tears dried up. She started tracing imaginary shapes on Kimberley’s arm. “Do you know what I think we need to do?”
Kimberley kissed her head and rested her cheek against it. “What’s that?”
“Well, I think when we go back we should do an exclusive for OK! with you saying how amazing I am in bed,” replied Cheryl.
Her suggestion was met with silence for a while as Kimberley tried to work out whether or not Cheryl was being serious. “I hope you’re joking”, she finally replied, squeezing Cheryl’s arm and laughing nervously.
“Well, maybe not put it so bluntly” agreed Cheryl, deep in thought. “But an in-depth interview – how happy we are now we’re together, some photos, then slip in there that I’m pretty damn good in the bedroom department”.
Kimberley pulled her head away and looked down at Cheryl. “Why on earth would we wanna spread ourselves over a magazine all of a sudden?”
Cheryl looked up into Kimberley’s eyes. “Because I feel so humiliated I can’t imagine ever leaving this house again”.
Kimberley stared back at Cheryl. She opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. Her frown deepened as she searched for something to say in response, but she was hesitant. Cheryl wasn’t going to like her answer.
Luckily the sound of her phone ringing broke the silence and she gently pushed Cheryl off so she could retrieve the phone. “Hi, Hilary,” she sighed sadly as she answered the call.
Cheryl leaned back on the sofa and groaned.
Kimberley shot Cheryl a look and lifted her legs off of her so she could stand up. “I know, I’m sorry, Hilary”. She walked over to the table and sat down, avoiding looking at Cheryl who was still sat on the sofa, observing Kimberley as she spoke.
“No, not at all. We just didn’t hear the phone, then after Cheryl spoke to Nic, well, then we were talking. I was just about to call you back actually”, Kimberley glanced at Cheryl, then turned her attention back to the call.
“No,” said Kimberley, shaking her head slowly. “Not yet anyway. I think it’s more shock and disappointment to be honest, Hilary”.
“He disgusts me”, shouted Cheryl from the sofa, following Kimberley’s conversation perfectly, despite being unable to hear Hilary.
Kimberley glanced at Cheryl while listening intently to Hilary. “Not right now. Maybe tomorrow, once it’s sunk in. I said I’d talk to everyone”, Kimberley nodded at Hilary’s reply, and absentmindedly played with the belt of her bathrobe.
Cheryl watched Kimberley for a few minutes as she nodded and responded to Hilary’s questions and comments. If Kimberley didn’t actually say anything, Cheryl couldn’t tell what Hilary was saying either, and she frowned as she watched Kimberley fall silent.
“So what happens now?” asked Kimberley, her frown deepening. Cheryl’s eyes narrowed as she watched Kimberley’s do the same.
“Right okay,” agreed Kimberley. “Well, we’ll have to think it all over, won’t we -call you back?” Kimberley fell silent again as she listened carefully to Hilary’s advice. “Sure - I will, Hilary. Bye”. She slowly ended the call and put the phone on the table before looking over at Cheryl.
“What else has he done?” asked Cheryl, sensing that was the reason for Kimberley’s reaction.
Kimberley didn’t say a word as she stood up and made her way over to the sofa. When she reached where Cheryl was sat she bent down and took the other girl’s face in her hands. “Cheryl, I love you, I swear I do. But please, just give me two minutes on my own”. She kissed Cheryl’s forehead then pulled away.
Cheryl grabbed hold of Kimberley’s hands, “babe, what’s going on?”
Kimberley shook her head and fought back the tears. “I need air, and I need to just…just please don’t follow me outside”. She squeezed Cheryl’s arms then let go, walking quickly towards the kitchen.
Cheryl sat where Kimberley had left her as she heard the patio doors open, and she heard the sound of the sea air enter the house. As the doors quietly thud shut, silence took over and Cheryl stood up, making her way into the kitchen. She stopped as she entered the room and saw Kimberley outside through the kitchen window.
Kimberley was stood leaning on the wall facing out to sea, with her back to Cheryl. Cheryl put a hand out and grabbed the door frame, as if she would carry on walking and go outside if she didn’t hold onto something.
Instead she turned around and walked back into the hallway and grabbed onto the nearest thing to support herself – the marble banister, and she lowered herself down onto the bottom step and sat, leaning her head against the side and ignoring the cold of the marble. She hoped the cold would numb everything and make her forget the past hour. But it didn’t.