Chapter song is white horse by Taylor Swift; because damn, it made me cry while writing this chapter.
Every single place in my body hurts. Every single one. From my head to my nose and to my ribs and stomach and again, everywhere.
I couldn't believe what my dad has become. I can't believe what he had done to me. My own father, the person who is supposed to care for me and support me and keep me from the exact things he had done to me, has became psycho and alcoholic.
I was two seconds away from falling and starting to crawl to Harry's house. My feet had given up already and my lungs where burning from the lack of oxygen.
But when I saw his house the life was given back to me once more. I gathered all the strength left in me and quickly paced to his house and wiped my nose and mouth though blood was still running down.
I knocked two times and there was no answer. Please be home. Please. I knew his friends were coming over but, God, please don't be out with them Harry.
Another two knocks and again nothing. I even called his name although my voice was low but still, nothing. Maybe he is sleep or maybe he is upstairs and can't hear me since his house is like a mansion.
Or maybe he is out with them. But that thought vanished quickly as I saw his car and it's tilted black windows parked outside.
I decided to turn the knob and just go in. I couldn't stand on my feet any longer and although I was burning up inside, I was freezing to death from the rain and the cold breeze on the outside.
When I closed the door behind me, I could hear chattering going on somewhere in the huge house. I sighed in relief and slowly made my way to where the sound was coming from and figured it was in the living room.
As I was walking, the voices got clearer. I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but I couldn't help but listen to some of the voices belonging to a couple of men.
"Have you heard Harry has got a chick?" I froze right where I was as I heard that sentence. Chick? Did he just call me a chick? Oh how I wish I could just go in there , kick him and tell him he likes me and I'm not his chick.
"Yeah. I bet she is hot. Can't wait till he is done with her and I can bang her." The accent of the voice sounded unfamiliar. Maybe Russian? No. Russians don't sound like that.
"Shut up Niall. You can never bang her." Oh Harry... How I missed his voice even if we were apart only for a few hours.
"And one question. What do you exactly mean by me being done with her?"
"Oh, you know exactly what I mean." The voice, who now I know was Niall said.
What did he mean by that? Why would he be done with me? What does that even mean? Being done with me? I still didn't understand the statement. And why would it be so obvious?
It was quiet for a few moments until Harry spoke up again.
"I don't even like her that much."
My world stopped. Every thing around me stopped. It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop.
I couldn't believe what my ears just heard. My heart dropped and shattered into a thousand pieces. He doesn't even believe in me. He lied.
This was torture. Pure torture. I was right. From the very start I was right. I put a hand over my mouth to keep me from screaming so loud the windows could break. I have never felt such strong feeling sunk into my chest so hard, it was getting hard to breathe.
I closed my eyes and pressed my fingers harder to my mouth, my knuckles turned white.
I was starting to believe in my dad. In what a pathetic, useless, disgusting human being I am. Just like him.
I wish I had my mother beside me. To tell me everything is going to be okay. That everything is just a nightmare. Everything will be over soon. To tell me Harry is a piece of shit. That men are all just like each other and how my dad always annoys him too. But I even didn't have that. I didn't even have a mother to tell me all the cliché things every mother says.
I didn't have a proper dad either, to come upstairs to my room when I'm breaking down and not wanting to talk to anyone, to tell me stories from his time when he met my mother and I would forget all about harry.
But I didn't even have that. I had nothing. The only thing I had left was him and now he was gone too.
Everything was just too much. Too much pain on my chest that I was panting for air now as I slowly backed away from the living room so they wouldn't hear me. But when I was about to leave, I realized, I don't even have a place to go either.
How pathetic. I was starting to laugh at how miserable I was. Can my life get any worse?
I just couldn't back away right now. I wanted his friends and him to at least see me one last time before I decide to end this.
I turned around and as I got closer I count to ten to calm myself down and make some air come back to my burning lungs, not wanting to have panic attacks like I used to do when Harry wasn't in my life.
"Harry?" I said as I reached the living room, making every single head turn towards me including harry's. The best actor I have ever seen. But even when I forced myself, I couldn't hate him. What have you done to me?
"Hey, babe. What-- what are you doing here? Oh my god! What happened to you?" His voice cracked as he jumped of his seat when he saw my soaked in water body and bloody face.
"Nothing, just that, my dad beat me up and I ran away to here." I chuckled sarcastically at how stupid I was, running away from my father to someone who isn't even my boyfriend, that I'm in love with, that doesn't even like me.
The 3 men seating there all exchanged looks of shock and terror with each other and turned their attention back to me.
"Oh my god. What the fuck is wrong with your dad?" Harry asked as he hugged my petite body.
Second later I pushed him away slowly and stood there hugging my own self, knowing after everything is finished, I'm the only one left for myself.
I didn't want to make him feel like he had to hug me or care for me or feel pity, or make him feel like he had to pretend even when he didn't want to.
Harry's expression changed to scared, shocked and confused. "What is wrong baby?" His voice was now a whisper for only me and him to hear.
"Actually, nothing. I'm-- I'm just... Um... Gonna go. Bye."
As I turned to leave he grabbed my wrist and yanked me back. "What? You can't leave like that! Let me drive you home at least."
"It doesn't matter. I don't even have a home to go to." I whispered the last part more to myself but in all of it my voice cracked as tears welled up in my eyes but I quickly turned not wanting him to see me crying.
I slowly headed to the door, still hearing some last words.
"Man, I think she heard you."
"I don't know."
.....
Okay but for real this chapter made me crack a bit. And be ready because there will be a lot of these chapters with the smut ones.
So the next update will be, 130 VOTES and 10 COMMENTS.
Thank you