I let out a sigh of relief as smoke billowed out of my mouth, making a beautifully deadly halo around my messy hair. But even the cancer sticks weren't diminishing the thoughts in my head, the ones more dangerous than the poison in my veins.
"Hazel!" I called, just on a whim, hoping that maybe my baby girl would come running into the hotel room and jump on my bed. If I tried hard enough, I can still feel her soft fur between my fingers, but I don't bother to try with anything anymore.
"Hazey!" I yelled louder. "Come here, babes! Come back!"
The yelling got louder and louder until someone pounded on my door, asking if I need help finding my dog, or if he could help with anything.
"No," I replied, inhaling another breath of poison and releasing more smoke. "Unless you can bring someone back from heaven."
The man stared at me, then realization dawned on him. He stared at the floor, unsure of what to say.
"Make me forget." I whispered, mostly to myself. The man in front of my looked up and grinned, promising me that he would indeed help me forget. I nodded hesitantly, not sure of what was going on, until he took my cigarette and smushed it against his finger tip, then pushed me back into the hotel room and closing the door with a faint click.
•••
I sat at the bar, head in hands, filing through my mind and thinking of everything I'd lost lately. I took my phone out and looked through old videos of me and Vega, or me with all of my friends and Wishbone. Even the material items in the house were gone, and everything tore me to shreds.
"Can I help you?" The bartender takes my glass and offers to refill it who knows how many times that night. I nod silently, still looking through my phone as the glass is set beside me. I gulp down the burning liquid greedily, then ask for more. I can still remember, and I don't want to remember.
A few drinks later, and a man sits down beside me. His smile is charming, and he smells like pine. Nor the Christmasy kind, though.
"How are you?" His accent is southern and thick, and I instantly smile at him. He's handsome.
"Good." My voice is shaking. "You?"
He shakes his head in an annoyed manner, but his eyes are still bright and his smile is still apparent. "Just trying to get laid, and I'm having trouble doing just that." He said bluntly. I stared at him in shock as he continued. "All of the girls here are clingy. I thought a handsome man like you could give me some advice." He winked at me, and I don't think I've ever been more confused in my entire life. So he's straight, bi? Is he hitting on me, or just being friendly?
The man was waiting for an answer, so I shook my head to clear my thoughts. Why do labels matter anyways? Like who you want to like.
In all of my haste, I didn't realize that the southern man had left and was talking to a blonde girl with way too much makeup on. I rolled my eyes and downed my drink again, still feeling the stab of regret and guilt in my stomach that I've been fighting so hard to ignore. I need something to make it go away.
Another girl, this time brunette with a pixie cut, sat down next to me and mumbled something incoherent. I stared at her and she stared at me.
"Can you make me forget?" I asked quietly. She stared at me, like I was a ghost. She looked even more drunk than I am.
"Can you change me?" She asked, even more quiet than me. We both knew the answers to our questions, but that didn't stop us from getting a hotel room and, indeed, making each other forget.
•••
3rd
Kian got out of the shower, still feeling dirty. Not only from last night, but from the guilt and sadness that seemed to cover him, like dirt. Grimy and unsatisfying.
He and Jc bought another apartment, but it was empty and hadn't been entered since they bought it two weeks ago.
Kian decided that today was as good as any other day to actually enter his new home. He gathered his suitcase, the only items he owned, and drove to his apartment, wondering if Jc was there, or if he'd been MIA, too.
**
He walked down the long hallway to the door that belonged to him and Jc. He opened it, and bit back a sneeze at the amount of dust that flew at his face. The apartment had been vacant before they bought it, so it's been empty for who knows how long?
He walked to his room, his shoes clicking on the floor and echoing off of the walls. He shuddered. How could this place be considered a home? He wondered if it would ever feel like one.
He entered the room he considered "his", and dropped his suitcase. Looking around, he found a mop someone must've left behind, so he wetted it in the sink and got to work on the dusty, dirty floors. After that was done, he used an old shirt to wipe the dust off of the counters in the kitchen, and evaluated the apartment once more.
"It's cleaner," he thought, "but it definitely needs furniture."
It was only the morning, so he decided to buy some furniture for the living room and his room.
"I should probably find Jc.." He thought sadly, wondering where in the world the adventurous boy was now.
"Bye Hazel! I'll take you out when I get back!" He promised, before leaving to shop. And it wasn't until he was halfway to the store when he realized what he'd said.
•••
Jc
I am disgusting.
Jc must've showered eight times, but he still felt like a disgusting wreck. Like a whore.
The curly haired boy glanced at the girl with the pixie cut, who was soundly sleeping in his bed. Well not his bed, the hotel's.
"I don't own a bed." He thought grimly, changing his shirt and packing up his stuff into a suitcase.
He was sick of drinking. He was sick of forgetting and sick of getting laid. At least, doing it without feelings involved. Without a purpose. He felt gross and useless, and he wanted to change. But most of all, he wanted to go home. He wanted to go home to Wishbone, and Kiggers, and even destructive Hazel.
He finally packed everything up and left the hotel, after leaving a note for the girl still sleeping in his bed.
He drive quietly to the apartment he and Kian lazily agreed on a little over two weeks ago, hoping that their grief didn't lead them to buy a shitty house. Apartment*
He entered the empty place, hoping that Kian was there. He just wanted to cuddle up and reminisce on the good times with their best friends, not avoid the subject any further. The pets deserve more than that.
But he was met with a surprisingly clean apartment. He found an old shirt in the kitchen, and briefly wondered if this was even his house, but then he found Kian's suitcase in one of the rooms. Judging by the still wet mop laying in the middle of the room, he'd been here recently.
Jc unpacked his few things in the other slightly smaller room, and plugged his phone in. It's been dead for more than a week, but he hasn't stayed in a hotel long enough to bother charging it.
He fell asleep on the cold, hardwood floor.
"Kian, hurry up." He mumbled quietly, slipping into unconsciousness.
•••
Kian
"Yeah, yeah, just this way,... Yes! Right in here." Kian motioned the much buffer men and women into his apartment. His and Jc's*
He silently wondered if he would ever come back, but once he saw the muddy footprints leading to one of the rooms, he knew that he had either come back, or a squatter did.
He quickly cleaned up the marks and let the people carry the huge couch into the living room, and arrange it. While one woman was arguing with two other men, he followed the prints back to a room. He saw Jc, asleep next to his suitcase, and his phone in his hand. Judging by the bags under his eyes, he hasn't slept much lately. Kian could relate.
"He a squatter?" A woman's deep voice jolted him out of his head. She was standing right behind him, her muscular arms folded as she stared at Jc.
"No, no, we own the apartment together." Kian reassured, shutting the door so that the other boy could get a few more hours of sleep.
The woman shrugged and walked back to the living room. "Put the couch over there, you fucking idiots!" She shouted at the workers. They groaned and pulled the couch over to another side of the room. Honestly, Kian didn't care where it was, as long as it was there.
"That looks good to me," Kian shrugged and pointed to the couch. The workers shrunk away in relief and said they'd bring the other stuff up right away as they exited the apartment. Kian shrugged again and went to the balcony, pulling out a cancer stick and smoking it in silence.
•
Kian thanked the workers as they left, then gazed tiredly around the apartment. It seemed a little more cozy, but it still echoed and feels like a house, not a home.
He sighed and plopped on the couch, turning on the new flat screen and putting Netflix on. He didn't pay attention, though, he felt like he was forgetting about something.
Jc!
He hurried back to Jc's room and peeked in the door. Jc was waking up as Kian walked in.
"What's up, man?" Kian sat down beside the shorter boy. Jc was wide awake within seconds, and instantly jumped onto Kian in a breathtaking hug. Literally, it took Kian's breath away.
Kian awkwardly patted Jc's back as he tried not to die. He finally let go, and Kian let out a breath of relief.
"You okay?" Kian glanced at the older boy in concern as his eyes watered up. Jc looked at him, making intense eye contact, before shaking his head no and finally letting his tears out. Kian hugged him quietly while Jc cried on his shoulder. Sometimes words couldn't help, and you just need to cry.
After a few minutes of that, Jc stood up and wiped his face.
"That's the first time I cried since," he paused. "you know." Kian nodded understandingly and led Jc to the living room, where the new couch and tv were.
"Aw, yeah!" Jc brightened up as he noticed the pool table in the other room. "Pool table!"
Kian grinned and sat on the couch again. "I got us hooked up, dude." he laughed.
Jc sat beside him wordlessly, and didn't object when Kian leaned against him. He rested his head on Kian's, letting out a content sigh.
"I think it's gonna be okay." Kian mumbled, yawning. Jc glanced at the boy, a warm feeling going up his spine.
"I think you're right," he paused, letting Kian doze off a little. "For once." He added quietly, kissing the top of Kian's forehead.
"Bitch, I'm always right." Kian retorted sassily, or, as sassily as he could for how tired he was. Jc blushed wildly as he realized that Kian was awake, and he felt Jc's light kiss on his forehead. He didn't respond, hoping Kian would drop it and fall back asleep.
"And yes, Jc, I felt that." Jc wanted nothing more than to crawl in a hole as Kian spoke up. "Thank you."
Jc kissed him on the cheek this time, a sudden rush of confidence running through him. "Goodnight, Ki."
Kian didn't respond, though. At first Jc thought he fell asleep, but he turned to look at the curly haired boy a moment later.
He finally spoke up, making Jc regret getting comfy because he would surely have to get up and drive somewhere now:
"I'm hungry."
•••••
It had a cute ending at least?
:(
2061 WORDS GUYS
•••
Sorry for not posting anything in awhile .. my jian heart is dying
but this was already made a while ago so why not post ?
•
idk if there will be a next story