Previously:
"Your not a brat Elsa, you are beautiful, kind, smart, funny, really shy, sweet, loving girl dealing with self harms but never call your self a brat or anything that isn't true" Jack said. He thinks I'm all these things, no he is just saying this to make me feel better and I am a brat he can't chance that, no one can.
Present:
Elsa P.O.V
"No, I'm non of these things" I said as I felt one tear roll down my cheek. Jack wiped away my tear with his thumb. Something inside me wants to trust him but something tells me not to, I'm so confused right now.
"Yes you are, now stand up" Jack said as he stood up. But when I was about to stand up I fell, Jack catches me before I hit the floor. I'm getting so weak because I'm not eating anything anymore. Well I don't care about that and I wish I had fallen to the floor, it would have been better for me. Now we were both sitting on the floor but Jack is hugging me, I don't feel comfortable like this.
"Wait here, I'm going to get something" Jack said as he stood up and walked to the door. This is perfect, he left me here and I have my razor with me so I can continue to cut. The only problem is I have to find my razor, Jack threw him somewhere witch I have no idea what direction he threw my razor, and now it's up to me to find him and by the dark in here it could be hard and besides I have no idea when Jack comes back with...who knows what he will bring.
I searched the room from bottom up to top and luckly for me I found my razor, thank God i found him. I tried to stand up but like last time I couldn't stand but I managed to get my razor. I began to cut and when i was cutting the third scar, the door opened and Jack came in holding something but I'm not sure what it is.
Jack walked to me and sat on the floor. I saw what he was holding, he was holding a sandwich. Oh no, please don't tell me he is going to make me eat that sandwich. And I got to say this sandwich is probably really gross, it has butter and cheese. It will make me fat even when I am super far.
"I'm not gonna eat that" I said. I think he just ignored me and opened the sandwich.
"If you don't eat the sandwich, I will feed you and don't test me because I will feed you if I have to. Now open up" Jack said. I know Jack is serious because he is really stubborn, he has always been that way and probaly always will be but I not sure. Well I will never because my life is about to come to an end soon. I had to obey him so I opened my mouth and put the gross sandwich into my mouth.
This is so disgusting, I feel a strange feeling in my stomach that I haven't felt in a long time and that is food in my stomach. I know I have eaten a banana but that doesn't make my stomach full and now he is getting full by each bite. I dont like it when he is full of when I eat but what can I do now I'm begin forced to eat against my own will. I need to be skinny and that can never happen if I eat and if he makes me eat.
Jack forced me to eat the whole sandwich and now I really just want to throw her up and get that sandwich out of my stomach. I don't feel good right now, this is so gross and it taste horrible. I don't feel weak at the moment but I feel different.
"See, this isn't that bad" Jack said. Oh god I hate him so much. He made me eat a whole sandwich and with cheese and butter, I wish I could just go back to my old life where Jack nor anyone doesn't notice me and I'm just last I alone. And I'm hurt because of it well I deserve to be hurt and broken. I'm just a waste of space at least that is what my family tells me even Anna says I'm nothing and worthless and should die and the list can go on and on for a long time.
"It wasn't bad...it was terrible" I said as i stood up. Now I can stand properly but why can I stand up? Just few minutes ago I couldn't stand up. I suddenly remember that I still have my razor but I hid it under my long sleeve shirt. Hopefully Jack won't find my razor because I know he will take my razor away from me and Jack has taken a lot from me he doesn't have to take anything more away especially my razor. The one only thing that I'm not loosing is my razor and he better not take my only friend that I have last away from me, the only thing that cares for me, the only thing that takes away my pain, the pain that Jack and the big four out me through.
I ran out of the Janitor closet and into the girls bathroom to throw up the sandwitch witch I was forced to eat. But when I was nearly to the bathroom someone gripped my wrist witch made me wince in pain. I looked at the person and saw Jack why does that not surprise me? Jack made me look at him in the eyes but I didn't want to make a eye contact with that bitch so I just looked down at my feet. I was just wearing normal really old and I mean really old sneakers and he is wearing new dark blue converse.
"Elsa don't throw up the sandwitch. It's not healthy for you" Jack said. Since when does he cares if I'm healthy or not? Well at least he has not been doing a good job at it for four years. I still don't understand why he ia suddenly nice to me after years of ignoring me.
"Why do you care anyway?" I whispered so only Jack could hear because I don't want attention from the students in the school. And I don't want to be with Jack, I mean he is the hottest not in the school and my x childhood crush but he will never be my crush ever again I will see to that. And bedside he probably has a crush on Rapunzel oh who am I kidding he lives her with all his heart I think, I don't know much about love. I mean I was her boyfriend until she cheated on him with Hans, I have always hated Hand he is a player for God sake.
"Elsa I..." Jack said but was interrupted by the bell. Thank God for that and we don't have the same class so I don't have to worry about Jack in my class and if he would ever find me in my hiding spot. I don't want anyone to find me in the back of the class, I like the peace and quit in the back of the class and in the dark well the dark usually doesn't me but I always use ten light from the window while I can to see what I am doing but sometimes the dark isn't that dark it's only a little dark the good thing I I can see what I am doing in class and that is all that matters.
Now school is over and I have to run home. The reason why I have to run is because I don't want to have Jack on my heels or walking with me it's annoying. Oh god I made it without that Frost following me around. I walked inside and put my backpack to my 'room' where I always keep it.
"Surprise" Jack said making me jump. That son of a bitch broke into my house, wow can I hate him more or not? Ok I can hate him more. I think he knows I can call the police anytime soon but he seems not afraid of me doing it it's like he doesn't care. It's hard to explain but I kinda get this feeling that if I call the police Jack will only tell them that I cut and I don't eat, that is probably the reason why he isn't afraid of me calling the police because he will do it so I should be afraid now. I don't want Jack to tell the police that I will be send somewhere I don't want to go like the hospital and there I can't end my life.
"What the hell do you thibk your doing here?" I yelled at Jack. I need to remember to close all the Windows and all the doors in the house and put everything on lock so he won't ever get in here again. It's like he is stalking me or something ok maybe not stalking just following me and watching me everywhere I go. That is pretty much taking. Yep he is totally stalking me an wits rather creepy.
Jack ignored my question and began to walk right my way, at the same time I started backing until I couldn't back anymore. I was up to the wall with my back and Jack is pinning me down to the wall. What the hell is he doing? I look into his eyes and I only saw hurt and pain. I'm not sure why I is hurt but I will never know and I don't want to know anyway. Is he going to rape me I something? I don't want to lose my virgin with that bitch and I bet he has done 'it' with Rapunzel. I mean Jack is so hot- WAIT WHAT? Snap out of it Elsa i broke your heart and shatteredit, and that mean I'm not aloud to say this things about him ever again. But I can't help it he is so handsome- ahh I'm doing it again. Ok I know what that means, it means that I have to cut deeper and deeper than I already am cutting well at least I will feel the pain of calling Jack handsome and hot. I must been punished for calling him that, I will punish my self after he is gone and I HOPE he will leave soon.
"J...Jack...W..w..what....a...are...you...d...doing?" I asked shuttering. Now his face was showing no emotion, I'm not sure what I is going to do now I don't know if I wants to hurt me or something. He was still pinning me to the wall and ignored me completely again it's like he is in his own world. If he is going to hurt me then he can I really don't care I am going to die soon so if course I don't care about the pain I am going to be in now beacuse the pain when I die will be worse and that is a promise I will die in a really painful way and no one can stop me from killing myself not even Jack nor anyone so deal with it in going to die soon.
"Elsa" Jack said. Wow now I is talking after ignoring my questions. He ia really confusing me right now, first he is pinning me to the wall and the best thing I know he lets go of me. Is I crazy or something? I think I is crazy now.
"Elsa, I know you have no right to trust me but I want to make it up to you. I want to help you through all of this even if you try to push me away" Jack said. I'm surprised by his words, he doesn't need to help me with anything he is just wasting his time with me I mean I will be dead in a few days so there ia no point trying.
I just kept silence, well the truth is i have no idea what to right now. Should I believe him or not? One part of me wants to believe him and forgive him and let him help but the other part wants to kick him in the manhood and call the police. I don't know what to choose. Inside my head there is a war of I should believe him or not. I hate that war and I know what part is going to win it.
I want to speak but no words came out of my mouth even if I try to talk I can't like my mouth has been glued or I just can't find the right words to say, yep that is the reason I hope. I just can't find the right words to say I'm positive that is the reason.
"H....how are you going to...help me?" I whisper/mumbles the question. This was the only thing that I could get out of my mouth. It's really hard to find something to say, it's like he is saying he cares for me but says it in different words.
"If I would tell you, you Wil just refuse my help. So you can't know or hear my plan but don't worry you will not get harmed in anyway, you will be perfectly fine and if my plan works then you will be better than fine" Jack said. I think I am refusing it already. What is his plan exactly? I need to know his plan since I'm involved in it so I deserve to know it.
"How can I trust you if I don't know what you're gonna do and especially to me?" I asked Jack. He started walking the direction to the door. But before he went out of my house he stopped and turned around.
"I guess you just have to find that out" he said as he walked out of my house for good and leaving me alone standing there still in shock.
I walked to the living room where I saw the family pictures hanging on the walls. I see one where Anna so young and in her cradle, I remember that night. Anna had a nightmare and Mom sang a beautiful song to her. I reamember the song it was so beautiful. I began to sing the lullaby that mom made for Anna, I wish she had sung a lullaby for me when I had nightmares
Constant as the stars above,
Always know that your loved.
And my love shining in you,
Will help you make your dreams come true,
Will help your dreams come true.
The lamb lies down and rest it's head,
On its mother's downy bed.
Dolphin plays in the moonlight's glow,
And butterfly dreams of a violet rose,
Dreams of violet rose.
I'll cradle you in my arms tonight,
As Sun embraces the moonlight.
The clouds will carry us off tonight,
Our dreams will run deep like the sea,
Our dreams will run deep like the sea.
Constant as the stars above,
Always know that your loved.
And my love shining in you,
Will help you make your dreams come true,
Will help your dreams come true.
I finished the song I at least this is how I remember it. I don't know if it is like this but this is how I keep it in my memory. I wish we could be a family again, we had so much fun together but now it's all gone because of me. They hate me, they only see me as a maid and a housekeeper nothing more.
I walk into the kitchen and saw a note on the fridge. I swear to God that this note has never been there. Oh god Jack must have put the note there, I'm not sure if I should read the note or not but if I had out this note there then I wants me to read it. I walked to the fridge and took the note and started reading it.
I know you didn't eat so I made you a pasta for dinner
~Jack💙
What? He made me dinner but I don't eat so he made pasta for nothing. I think I need to cut now without eating that gross pasta. I walked to my 'room' to find my razor. Wait where is my razor?, I'm pretty sure he would be here somewhere. I looked everywhere even in my backpack but nothing. Where could he be? I walked to the bathroom and found another note. Great just great.
I took your razor, you will understand that this is good for you
~Jack💙
That son of a bitch took my razor. I took my friend away from me. I'm gonna kill him next time I see him. Now I know I can hate him more than I already do, I thought it wasn't possible to hate him more but not I was wrong.
There are other ways to cut than this one I just have to find a knife. I walked back to the kitchen looked for knives but instead of finding a kinda I found another note. Are these notes everywhere, it's like Jack knows what I am going to do next.
We use knives to cut through food not flesh
~Jack💙
I'm just gonna throw up the food I was forced to eat by Jack since I can't cut. I started walking to the bathroom to throw up. I opened the toilet but there was no water in it, oh please don't tell that Jack took the water from the toilet. It's liek I ia watching ever move I make and is one step ahead of me. And of course I found another note.
The food is meant to be in your stoma I not the toilet
~Jack💙
Are you ducking kidding me. Since I can't throw up i just going to do my homework, I had no time in school since Jack was following me around all school day. I have homework in chemistry and I hope I won't find another note.
After an hour I'm done with all my homework and now I'm just gonna go to sleep. I have no idea how long I will survive without my razor it's like my razor is my whole life now. And soon my life will be over and my body will and up in a river. Well I am going to jump I a bridge so I will die well at leats i hope i will die. I will be in a much better placs if i diw, bettee than this cruel world.
When I go to school tomorrow I will kill Frost head. Butcfor now I'm going to sleep, I need sleep I mean everyone needs to sleep. And besides it's school tomorrow and I don't want to be tired in school and to tired to kill Jack.
A/N: Hello my Snowflakes and Snowballs.
End of chapter.
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