"Families are like fudge – mostly sweet with a few nuts." – Unknown
DEDICATION: For mosaici, because your haikus are worthy of Apollo.
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"Ugh, what?"
"Ooh, hostility! Now things are getting interesting."
"You woke me up from my nap!"
"You napped for aaaaaages!"
"I'm going back to sleep."
"Wait! I just wanted to ask whether our deal was back on."
"Oh yeah, what's happening with your job?"
"Well, my boss keeps an eye on me when I work."
"Kind of creepy if you ask me."
"Meh, he's just doing his job."
"So, there's absolutely no chance of you getting Employee of the Month?"
"Not unless we can prove that I didn't lose the key. Plus, my boss was told I was slacking off from my job. Probably Penelope's work, that low-life ho–"
"–usekeeper. We can't accuse her without proof, remember?"
"Do you expect me to just lay low and get shot down?"
"Don't worry, we'll cross the bridge when we get there. Besides, I think I've spilled enough blood for both of us."
"Don't remind me. I almost hurled when I saw the angle your arm was bent at."
"That sort of talk makes me glad I played Sleeping Beauty in the hospital room. Wish I was conscious enough to see you though. We could've played Monopoly."
"You having a dent in your skull would've made it that much easier to win."
"Okay, back to naptime. Do not disturb. You should get some sleep too."
"You are such a dingbat."
"Tell me something I don't know."
"..."
"Zzz..."
"I'm in love with a chipmunk."