27. 'As I look up to the stars, though we're far apart...'
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Leaving aside the fact that I was sleep deprived thanks to Dazai's absence, a new text from him makes me confirm that I would not be able to sleep a single wink tonight.
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'Meet me at the location I have circled below in the Google Map, at 5.30 AM!'
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Followed by a screenshot of the location.
5.30 AM! Why would he need me up so early?
I wasn't able to sleep a bit, and by 4.50 AM, I give up and go to the washroom to wash my face. I make sure to brush my teeth before I put on my best dress; an off the shoulder light blue dress that matched my navy blue and black checkered skirt. Once again, a dress Dazai had picked out especially for me. After I put on my shoes, I step outside, only to see Akiko sitting beside Ranpo's room door.
"Akiko-san?!"
"You. YOOOU!" She hisses, grabbing a chunk of my skirt.
"So it was you who put me in Ranpo's 'care', huh?"
I was afraid to even ask what he did to her.
"Gosh, that is so embarrassing! I'm sure he'd have thought I was a total loser! I don't remember half the things I said..."
"Well..." I pause, mentally sending my kudos to Ranpo. I really would trust him again to take care of Akiko the next time she was drunk.
"You said you wouldn't marry Ranpo-san."
"ARRRRRGH, KILL ME." She whines. I can't help but to laugh, and I help her slug herself to her room.
"Date with Dazai?" She asks, taking note of my get up. I take a peek at my reflection in the mirror and pat my fringe before facing her.
"I wish I knew. Later, Akiko-san." I wave, before I dash out.
It is 5.10 AM by the time I step out of the building, and I begin my horrible attempt to find the location. Frankly speaking, GPS was not my cup of tea.
When I check the time at the arrival of the location –FINALLY - it is 5.35 AM. God, I'm late.
I catch my breath and look up to the building. The building is ten stories high- could this be the building Dazai took a picture from?
Horror welcomes my mind when I see Dazai waving from the terrace.
"Kira-chaaaaaaaan! Over here!" He yells out loud.
Now what could that suicidal maniac be up to? I wonder, on my way upstairs.
Dazai waves when I reach the top, and I walk up to him, panting.
"You're here!" He says, taking hold of my hand.
"Sorry I'm late!" I panic. He shakes his head and looks up to the sky.
"Nah, it hasn't started yet!"
"Eh? Dazai? You're not... You're not gonna ask me to commit a double suicide with you, right?" I ask, and he turns to face me with a bright smile.
"Kira-chan, do you like the sunrise?"
"Eh? Er yeah. But answer me, Dazai."
Dazai lets out a soft laugh, not turning away from looking up to the sky. He does not have any cuts or scars on his body, and his trench coat is as clean as it had been when I last saw him. I felt that it was safe to say that his mission was a success.
The 22 year-old turns to look at me, and I see that his eyes look just as exhausted as I was feeling then.
"I'm happy to know that you'd say yes, if I ever asked."
It takes me a minute to answer him, because I am too busy feeling warm and gushy inside. How Dazai would know me so well was only a mystery to me.
"Were you going to ask me that, though? Is that why you asked me here?"
Dazai shakes his head. "More importantly, good morning, Kira-chan."
"Er." I swear, I wouldn't even try to understand this man.
"Thanks for coming."
"Sure, but please, will you enlighten me as to why I was asked to meet you here at 5.30 AM on a work day?" I ask, arching an eyebrow. Dazai lets go of my hand before he lets out a soft laugh.
"You sound like the President."
"Dazai."
"Fine, fine!" He stretches his hand upwards, then points to the sky.
"I wanted to see the sunrise with you." He lets me know.
The sun had started to be visible just then, and we both stared at it, smiles on our faces as we experienced our first sunrise together. For some reason, my heart wouldn't stop thumping like crazy, and I guessed it was because I haven't seen a sunrise in a long, long while now.
Dazai leaned against the rails of the terrace, and looked at me, after the sun fully rose.
"Pretty, isn't it?"
"Totally." I looked back at him, and felt an exciting rush of thrill. Maybe it's the pretty yellow-orange lights of the sun. Maybe it's the fact that we hadn't seen each other for a full day. Maybe, it was because he had taken my hand again.
Maybe it was all of the above.
Or maybe, it was simply for the fact that it was Dazai.
It was always him, after all.
"Bet you aren't suicidal anymore, Kira-chan." He whispers in a voice so soft, I was barely able to hear him. I looked at Dazai's face when he said that. I've never considered it, and that thought made me really happy. I didn't know if it was true or not, but it definitely was leaning more to the positive side.
While I thought of what to say to him instead of smiling, Dazai spoke up again.
"Just know... That I'll always be here for you. You just need to call out my name."
I have to ask him a question to get him distracted from the blush that began creeping on my face.
"What do you want to do in life, Dazai?" I ask, and he smiles at the sky.
"I want to be so deeply in love," he says, "That even the ocean would be jealous." He grinned, looking down at the road next.
Cheesy as ever, huh Dazai?
As he stood leaning against the rails and smiling, I begin to experience something I've never felt before. It was one of the most profound moments of my life, his smile was just amazing. This guy was so carefree and gentle. He totally won a huge piece of my heart, and I join him in leaning against the rails, and look at the man beside me. We are standing really close, and I could feel the warmth from his body sweep onto mine.
The moment was so profound, that tears start to well in my eyes even. The urge was so strong, that I stop leaning on the rails and turn around to wipe my tears.
"I want to make many places in many people's hearts, before I die." He adds.
"Dazai, please." I say, holding out my palm in front of his face. "I know you love Augustus Waters, but you need to take a chill pill on your death wish. No way are you leaving us."
Dazai looks at me as if he wanted to cry, but then he smiled.
"What are we gonna do for the next two hours before we head off to work?" He asks, instead.
He really knows what to say at the right places.
"How about we start with some breakfast? My treat."
"You're on!" He exclaims excitedly like a little boy, and I laughed.
"Come, I'm starving!" He says, grabbing my hand.
I felt another thrill, and this was enough to make me feel a little dizzy even.
Good thing he took the lead.
He'll always take the lead, when I need him.
My next profound thought hit me harder, even though I had known it all along.
I was in love with Dazai Osamu.
"Hey, Dazai?"
He stops walking and looks at me.
"What is it, Kira-chan?"
It probably was the power from the sun. Or whatever.
Whatever it was, it gave me the confidence to wrap my arms around the man in front of me.
"I love you, Dazai."
I wish I could have seen the expression on his face, but when I feel his arms wrap around my back, I easily could tell that he is smiling.
"Feelings mutual, Kira."
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a/n: Dying omfg ;-; Here it is, the dazkira fluff that many of you requested! Thanks for the support my smols, ily guys so so much ♥♥