ch. 15 mistakes live forever
Nathan's POV:
I pulled my chin up towards the metal bar sweat droplets trickled down my temple and hit the concrete pavement of the gym. My callused hands throbbed from holding only the bar for so long.
I took a quick intake of air and I released myself by letting go of the cold metal bar. My bare feet hit the ground and made a slapping sound, I cringed at the pins and needles that spread through my legs, I mumbled swear words under my breath and walked over to the bench. I leaned down into my bag and grabbed my water bottle then quickly chugged it down.
The water refreshed my dry throat the second I swallowed causing me to sigh out in the pleasure of the cold refreshing liquid. I chucked the bottle now empty bottle back into my bag.
100 chin-ups done. I contemplated doing more because of the energy that I gained from the fight with Luke this morning. Actually no, I will just have a quick round with the punching bag instead.
I grabbed my speaker remote from next to my bag and turned on the radio. After going through the songs I decided on 'Ante up' by M O PI pressed the button repeatedly and turned it up full volume. The music vibrated through the room shaking the floor.
I put the remote down and leaned forwards, grabbing a piece of old cream colored material from my bag and wrapped it around my bruised and cut knuckles. My eyes scanned over my callused skin. Years of fighting and hitting walls out of frustration does that to your hands.
I finished wrapping my knuckles with the material and tightened my fists for a couple seconds then relaxed my hand, happy with the way the material was holding up. The material was tight successfully covering my purple and blue fists.
I paced towards the platform and hauled myself up to the rope barrier, then hopped over the red ropes. Once on the platform, I walked towards the punching bag and started off with a few small right and left hooks. Left, right, left, right. After minutes my blood spread quickly through my veins while adrenaline rushed through me. The music was getting me hype.
With each punch, force shook the punting bag, my heart began hammering in my chest sweat covered my body. Droplets running down my temple, arms and back.
Even with the loud music, the hard dominating sounds of each punch caught my attention. I was in the zone. The more bruises I would surely get, didn't bother me. I just kept going, chucking hard uppercuts and right hooks into the punching bag with all the force I have.
Sweat trailed down my back on the trail of my spine, my hands were numb, my head was throbbing, my heart was hammering.
The song ended and I slammed the punching bag with a final deadly right hook, as hard as I could. My adrenaline levels lowered and the thoughts that I was trying to escape came flooding back in. My breath wavered and shivers crawled over my body. My hands began throbbing and blood leaked through the bandages from old cuts that had reopened.
I fell onto my shaking knees and held onto my head with hands, covering my ears with my shaking hands in hope to block out the thoughts.
Everything reminded me of her. Everything, I destroyed her and I will never forgive myself for killing the angel she was.
I will never forgive myself for helping my father destroy her whole life. I knew it was happening, but I never said anything. I never helped her. I was just as bad as Luke, I was too scared and selfish to warn her. To save the angel.
My body shook as the hardest fact kept replaying in my head. My whole body fell to the ground on my knees, clutching my head harder. NO. It can't be true.
She's coming back. She's coming back. She's coming back.
"Please." I silently whispered to myself, pleading that this was just some nightmare. Sasha wouldn't come back here. She's not that dumb. I hadn't seen her in years but I know that after what happened to her, no sane person would return.
I wonder how much my beautiful little sister has grown up. I just hope that she didn't let what happened here completely change her.
She was so kind, perfect, lovable. Too good for this place, to good for anyone.
I should have protected her, I should have been the brother that she always deserved. But no. I wasn't. I let the lies my father told me to control me and my decisions. He destroyed our family. I lost my sister and my mother because of him. I was left with that disgusting monster. I would get my revenge on him one day but not now, I wasn't strong enough. Yet.
Wherever he went people suffered. People changed. They lost their sense of self. They lost what made them human.
He was a monster. And that's exactly what he made me. I just hope for the love of god he didn't succeed in making Sasha one as well.
"Nathan!" His voice called to me from upstairs, snapping me out of my painful thoughts. Every time I thought of her, it hurt me. She was my only weakness.
"What!" I yelled back to him while standing from my crouched position and grabbing my stuff ready to leave the gym in the basement.
"Get you ungrateful ass up here!" I bit my lip resting the urge to tell him off. I climbed up the stairs with long strides and went towards his office because that's where I'm assuming he was.
I walked down the dark empty halls. Halls that should be covered in nice family photos, like normal 'family' homes. But no, they were empty. Empty Just like where my heart should be.
I pushed his office door open, still complete sweaty. I looked at him in his expensive suit and fake his 'Loyal' business man look he always tried to make people believe. He grabbed some papers and placed them carefully into his bag. I watched him quietly with hatred no doubt blazing through my intense gaze.
"What do you want Luke? I need to have a shower." I didn't even bother hiding how pissed of I am to have to talk to him. His head snapped up to me and he narrowed his wrinkly eyes.
"DO NOT talk to me like that ever again, do you understand boy?" I nodded my head sarcastically at him and smiled the fakest smile I could. He grumbled under his breath but brushed it off.
"I'm going out. When your sister arrives to let her in. Make sure she does not go 'exploring'. We wouldn't want her to find anything, that she could use against us. It's bad enough we have to take care of that runt let alone have her get us arrested. Oh and make sure not let that cop out of your sight." I was so close to storming up to him and snapping his disgusting neck. I balled my fists up next to me and nodded stiffly, before spinning on my heels and exiting the room. Slamming the door loudly behind me.
I hated him and I hated him with everything inside of me.
+++
Sasha's POV
Thump, thump. Thump, thump. Thump, thump.
The silence of the car didn't help hide my crazy heart beat. I tried to calm myself, my hands tapped fast on the cars hand rest repeatedly. A habit I have become used to doing when my nerves get the best of me.
I couldn't let them see me like this.
I just... I just wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to look into Luke or Nathan's eyes. I wasn't ready to look into their dark souls and see everything.
The hatred.
The heartlessness.
The inhuman like ways that they look at me.
The way they watched every movement, so naturally, observant. I was scared that Luke would see what I had become. Scared that Luke would know I have become.
I felt a hand reached over and rubbed small calming circles on my back in a friendly comforting way. I continued to look out the window, a shadow of a smile appearing on my face because of Damian's way of calming me. My hand slowly stopped tapping the car door and soon it was just resting calmly. Damian continued rubbing my back as we approached my old street. I finally turned to look at him, silently pleading him to turn the car in the opposite direction and take me as far away as possible.
He sighed and shook his head from left to right signaling that I had no hope in running away from my problems. Well, it was worth a try. I frowned and turned to look out my window again, moving away from his touch slightly, causing his hand to fall off my back. My eyes scanned every passing house and car, the neighborhood was still the same as I remember.
Rich.Rich.Rich. Shiny new cars. Bright flowers and clean gardens. Large classic wealthy people houses. Fake plastic people to live in them.
The car pulled to a sudden stop causing me to jerk forwards and hit my head on the driver's seat.
"FUCK" I spat out before I could obtain myself. The was slightly amused laugh from next me, my head snapped up towards Damian, I grumbled and frowned at him and began rubbing my head. His red face grew a dark shade of red from trying to hold in a laugh that was begging to be free. I sent him a glare, earning the laugh to echo through the range rover.
Before I realized what I was doing, I jumped out of the car and slammed the door shut. I walked quickly towards the front door of hell and slammed my fist against it three times.
"Um, Sasha?" I turned to look at Damian who had just hopped out of the car after my crazy evacuation, staring at him questioning him with my eyes.
My eyes widened in realization. I turned towards the door and then back to Damian and then back to the door. Oh, shit-ake-mushrooms.
Just as I was about to make my retreat back to the range rover and haul ass out of here.
The door was pulled open behind me.
I looked towards the blue sky mentally asking god, 'Who the fuck hates me this much to make my life such hell on earth?' I shivered involuntarily at the thought of 'You know who dumbass' that played into my head.
I looked back at Damian who was legit drooling and looking behind me towards the front door that had just been pulled open. I grabbed every bit of confidence I had left in me and turned towards the door.
*Nathans POV*
The door was getting abused by someone at the moment. That was my conclusion, while I ran down the stairs to answer it. In my towel. What doesn't judge I was having a shower. Whoever was knocking odiously had some serious reason so I just grabbed a towel and began descending the stairs.
The person hit the door extremely hard one last time before the silence was once again spread through the house.
I walked down the final hallway towards the door and unlocked it from the inside and pulled it open quickly.
A girl stood facing the opposite direction.
Not just any girl.
Sasha.
She was looking at some guy that was staring at me weirdly. She slowly turned towards my anxiously awaiting body. I hadn't seen her face yet, I could already tell she had changed a lot.
Sasha's grown up. As in literally grew like 7 inches? Oh, I don't know just a lot. I was too busy looking at her height to realize that she was looking at straight me now. My eyes traveled to her face and I froze. Wow, she looked so different. Even more beautiful. If it wasn't for the fact that I was expecting her today, I would not have of recognized her at all.
She smirked at me, while I just looked at her like a kid that just heard someone say vegetables are yummy.
Smirked. Sasha. Smirked.
Fuck. That is not good. That means she didn't just change physically, she changed mentally.
"What big brother no welcome home?" Her voice was tough but still managed to sound feminine and I continued to look at her in shock at how much she has changed.
From what I have gotten so far... She has become exactly what I hoping that she didn't. A broken girl.
I stepped aside without saying a word, she walked straight passed. Successfully slamming her shoulder into mine pushing me further out of her way.
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