William had to spend another year in school before he could leave. Gabe, on the other hand, was taking a gap year. In Spain.
"I want to go places," he'd told William "I hate to be a cliche, but I want to do shit."
"So in order to 'do shit', you're going to live in a country you've been to loads of times and you can speak the language fluently?"
He left in December.
They called each other almost every day. Gabe had managed to get a "super fancy update for my phone, so I can call you like, whenever, and it won't cost me my life savings!"
"I miss you, babe." William had whined over their most recent phone call. It'd been four months since he'd seen his boyfriend in the flesh, and his final exams were far too near for him to not panic.
"It's not that long, Bilvy," Gabe sighed, smiling to himself. "Just a few more months. Besides, with me on my gap year, we can start uni at the same time!"
"Doing completely different things, dipshit. I'd barely get to see you."
"What happened to us moving in together?" William could almost hear Gabe pouting at him.
"Well, one of us blew all their money on living in Spain for a year and can't seem to earn it back," William hissed harshly "And the other one is working their tits off in Lush four days a week despite having major exams to prepare for."
"Sweetie, I'm sorry, I..." Gabe trailed off, unsure of what to say. He always felt quite afraid of William when he got angry, because he never got angry about anything. So if William was angry, it was important.
"No, it's fine. I'm sorry I snapped, it's just," he sighed "I don't know."
"I have to go." Gabe rushed. He might not know what he was going to say, but he certainly knew what he was going to do.
***
The next few phone calls were somewhat rushed - instead of the usual hour or two, they would only last twenty minutes or so. Gabe always seemed to be so busy, but he always promised William that he would make it up to him.
It was two days before William's birthday - which meant almost an entire year since the two had been together.
"He'll probably forget, won't he?" William said to himself every time he thought about their anniversary. He would always dismiss the thought, telling himself that Gabe would remember, that he'd never forget something so important to William, but he couldn't help doubting himself.
Gabe hadn't picked up the phone the day before. William had just assumed he'd left his phone at home to charge when he went out - he did that so often - and by the time he got back, it was too late to call. William tried phoning him again that night, but it went straight to voicemail. He tried not to worry, but he couldn't help thinking something was wrong.
The day before William's birthday also marked two months until his final exam. Gabe's phone wasn't switched off, but he didn't answer it. He struggled to sleep that night.
***
After only three hours of sleep, William woke up at seven o'clock on his birthday. There were no celebrations. He didn't have time for them anymore - he had a seven hour shift at work and then the whole evening would be taken up with studying. His entire body was weak and all he wanted to do was stay in bed all day, just have one day to himself. He sighed, knowing that those things just don't happen when you grow up, and tried to make a list of positives in his head. Realising he'd need it to get through the day, he wrote them down in the notes on his phone.
Take-away coffee cup in hand, William sat on the train into the city by himself. He kept playing with the ring on his finger, wishing he could spend his birthday with his boyfriend. He tried to stop thinking about Gabe, knowing it would only make him more worried. Instead, he tried to add more positives to his list. By the time he got to his stop, he had seven.
***
Hayley was the only other person in when he arrived. There weren't even any customers - apparently eight in the morning is too early to be sniffing bath bombs.
"William! Thank goodness you're here!" Hayley threw up her hands cheerily, stepping down off the wooden stool. "I've been trying to put up more bottles but I'm sick of dragging this stool around the shop to reach the top shelves. Reckon you could get them for me?"
"No problem." he smiled, tying his apron and grabbing a few bottles from the cupboards at the bottom as Hayley took the stool into the storage room.
He liked Hayley. She was a sweet girl who always dyed her hair daring colours and put it up in cute hairstyles, and did amazing things with her makeup, and all three managed to constantly land her compliments from customers. He'd grown somewhat protective over her since he started working there. Occasionally some greasy old man would try to flirt with her, so William quickly adjusted to pretending to be Hayley's six-foot-tall boyfriend in order to get them to leave. Hayley liked how caring William was. She also liked that he would let her get on his back to reach the really high shelves in the back room.
"Taylor asked me to cover his shift," Hayley emerged from the storage room "So it's just me and you today."
***
Not many people came in, much to William's delight. A few teenage girls coming in to buy a few miscellaneous bath products, a man in his late twenties shopping for gifts for his girlfriend on their anniversary and asking Hayley for advice, a woman in her sixties shopping for her granddaughter's eleventh birthday.
William was constantly adding to his positive notes all day. For somebody who'd woken up feeling very negative indeed, he was having a really good day. He counted his positives - eleven so far, and it was only 12:04.
1. I can legally move out of my house and live by myself now
2. Hayley will probably do something really lovely like she always does
3. The woman at the coffee shop remembered me from yesterday
4. I was the only person in my carriage on the train
5. I didn't forget anything on my way to work
6. I do my exams soon, which means I leave school soon
7. That means Gabe will be back soon
8. Hayley made cake for my birthday, and since Taylor was off I got to eat more
9. Not many people came in to work today
10. I dressed appropriately for the weather (for once)
11. The buskers outside sound amazing
Working in a small Lush had its perks. Although it was harder to deal with mass amounts of people, nobody really knew this one existed, which meant that they spent a lot of their time just talking or thinking up new descriptions for the bubble bars.
"You've been playing with your ring a lot today." William hadn't even noticed he'd been touching it until Hayley pointed it out. "You've been spinning it around your finger non-stop for hours."
"Have I?" William asked, looking up from his skinny fingers "I hadn't really noticed."
"Is there something up? You just look really... concerned."
"It's Gabe," William sighed, pushing his hair out of his face, his eyes at his feet "He's not answering his calls, I think there's something wrong with him."
"He's probably just busy, Bill. You kn-"
"You don't get it. This isn't like him at all. If he misses a call, he always calls back. Always."
"Things will turn out just fine, trust me."
"But what if... What if..." William didn't want to think about what if. He wanted to know that Gabe was okay and - most of all - that he still cared about William.
"He cares about you a lot, William, he must have a reason for not answering. He wouldn't leave you without saying goodbye."
"Damn right, I wouldn't." William's head shot up at the familiar voice. Stood in the shop entrance was Gabe, a smug look on his face and a take-away coffee cup in his hand.
William walked over to him, standing so close that he could feel Gabe's breath on his nose. Gabe raised an eyebrow at him and smiled a hello, but William wasn't smiling. He was fighting back tears. Before he turned to run into the back room, before he started crying below the shelves of shampoo bars, before Hayley had to phone Taylor to beg him to come back in and cover for William who "really needs to go home, and there's nobody else who can come in", William looked his boyfriend straight in the eye and said one thing.
"What is your fucking problem?"