*Re-cap*
~Lilly’s POV~
Him…the one who had rejected me, Him the one who wanted to sleep around and be an F’ing man whore. Him, the one who thinks he can walk right up to me and hug me as if everything is going to alright?
Anger pulsed through me and I pushed him away. Obviously he was shock from my sudden jester, which had caused him to fall back. I got up and saw him sitting there staring at me with a shocked expression. I guess he knows I’m pregnant now.
*
“How dare you.” I growled at him, “How dare you come here and hold me like you actually care.” Even though I was beyond pissed, just having him here calms me down, and my wolf is howling with excitement, thinking that with him being here holding me, means that he was going to take his rejection back.
But I was not going to take his crap today. My husband and the father of my child just passed and there was no way in hell he was going just waltz back into my life like nothing ever happened.
He looked up at me guilt written on his face and sadness in his eyes. He looked down at the ground not wanting to make eye contact with me. Playing with the grass he began to talk, but it was really low that I wasn’t sure I hard him right. “…wish I was the father… she deserves better…”
Why would he want to be the father? I must’ve heard him wrong, because he was the one to reject me, he didn’t want me because he want to continue to be a man whore, he is the reason that I’m standing here mourning my now dead husband, and he is the reason my child would grow up not knowing it’s father.
Anger was still passing through me and I just couldn’t stop the next thing that happened. I walked right up to him, knelt on down and slapped him hard across this face, he deserved so much more, but all this stress is already making the baby fussy, he or she is moving around feeling the distress I’m in.
I stand up and move back to where the chairs are. As I sit down I placed my hand across my growing belly hoping that my warm gentle touch would be enough to calm him or her down. After awhile of the baby not calming down completely I began to hum a song, It seemed to work perfectly and I was smiling.
But then I heard a man singing the song I was humming and his voice was beautiful, and he sang the song perfectly. I know it was James that was singing, but I chose to ignore him, but listen to the song, still smiling it brought tears to my eyes. I can’t hate him…he is my mate, but I will not give in to him easily.
All I can do right now is be thankful that he is keeping his distance, and also be thankful that his singing helped me clam down, I would never forgive myself if I let my feeling harm this baby inside me, this baby is my whole world now.
*James POV*
She pregnant…But I though werewolves couldn’t have kids till they found…their…mate…Oh God what did I do?
“How dare you.” she growled at me “How dare you come here and hold me like you actually care.” I could tell she was extremely pissed at me, and she has the right to be. When I met her, I was a different person, but she changed me. I know how completely cheesy that sounds, but it’s true and I was a fool not to notice it sooner.
I knew she could read the emotions playing on my face, so I looked down and played with that grass, not really sure what to do. But I started to speak really low so she wouldn’t hear me, but a part of wishes she does, “I wish I was that father, but she deserves better that me, they both do.”
I was just sitting there, wondering what it would be like to know that I was going to be a father, wondering what her skin would feel like on mine…, wondering what it would have been like to marry her…But then I felt her slap me hard across the face.
I didn’t say anything I didn’t even look at her while she walked away, I knew I deserved a lot worse. But the farther she walked away the more my body ached for her. My wolf was getting mad at me for not running after her. But I knew it was better for me to stay where I was. I was no expert, but if she was under stress that wouldn’t be good for the baby.
I just sat there not knowing what I was going to do, but then I heard her humming. I looked up and she was sitting down rubbing her baby bump and humming to it. I think me being here upset her more than I thought it would…
I wanted to help calm her and the baby down so I began so sing the song while she hummed it.
“My sweet baby on loan from above,
No better treasure could I more love,
I stand here beside your bed as I pray
I lay my hand on your head and I say,
May you grow up to serve Him
All of your days,
May He lead you and guide you
In all of your ways,
May he bless your future with,
Friendships that last
May you cherish your youth
And not grow up too fast,
I stare in wonder at your tiny frame
Just to think God knows you by name
He knows every hair on your head
He knows your thoughts before they are said
May you grow up to serve Him
All of your days,
May He lead you and guide you
In all of your ways,
May he bless your future with,
Friendships that last
May you cherish your youth
And not grow up too fast,
May God grant you peace
in the midst of a storm
May God give you strength even
when you're forlorn
May you answer the door when
Jesus comes knocking
May wisdom guide when
your mouth is talkin'
May discretion protect you
and keep you pure
May you never stumble
or fall for a lure
May your heart remain humble
to the very end
May uprightness and truth
be what you defend
May the world not ensnare
or change who you are
May the light that's within you
shine like the stars
May angels surround you
body, spirit, mind
May favor and peace be yours to find
May rejection and pain
never reach you
May your spirit grow bold
for what you're called to
May you grow up to serve Him
All of your days,
May He lead you and guide you
In all of your ways,
May he bless your future with,
Friendships that last
May you cherish your youth
And not grow up too fast,
As you rest in God's care I will rest too
Knowing that Jesus is watching over you
Amen"
Once I was done singing, I was Glad I had came, Lilly was sitting there smiling and tears running down her face. I know she hates me now, but I will try my dam hardest to get her back I do love her and I know I will love her baby.
I got up and walked towards her slowly wondering what I was going to say. When I was standing in front of her, I know what I was going to say.
I knelt on one knee and began in a whisper, “Lilly, I am truly sorry for what I did three years ago. I know you may have this though in your head that after that night in the woods I just started to bang every girl I could, but I didn’t every time I saw another girl I compared her to you. No one could be as beautiful you. And even know I feel the same. And I just want you to know that I’m here for you, for BOTH of you. Please know that I love you Lilly…” She tried to cut me off but I didn’t let her, “Wait, let me finish…you don’t have to say anything…and if you and the baby need ANYTHING call me, ok?”
All she did was nodded her head while a new stream of tears started. I stood up, genially kissed her forehead and walked away.
That was until…
“Ah!…James!…help!”
Oh god! Lilly!
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I bet you hate me right now don’t you?
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