Selena is wearing her usual attire, simple but I found it attractive when she’s wearing it. We first went to the mall to watch some movie. We both picked the horror one so it will be fun. Thinking that the both of us are braved to watch a terrifying 2D movie, we ended up hiding at each other’s arm or covering our eyes. But her yells reminds me of Merill. They both have the same kind of yell.
It was nice having Selena in a stroll, but not in a date. I felt uncomfortable and I don’t feel good whenever I’m with her. I love her, but it’s not the same as what I feel to Merill. Son of Hephaestus, stop thinking about her now! You’re having a date with someone. I shouldn’t think something that might get us in trouble. Or I’ll forever blame Aphrodite or Eros!
Selena is a big fan of parks. So, after we finished some movie, I drove her into a beautiful park where lovers are sitting on the bench talking and laughing, and then I remembered the day when Merill, Darcy and I were eating ice cream. That was fun. I smiled every time I think of it.
“What’s that smile?” Selena pulled me out from my thoughts.
I slightly frown when I looked at her, confused of what she’s talking about but I smiled eventually.
“It’s nothing,” I said and she let out a cute laugh.
We both sat on a bench, watching the lights surrounding the park and feeling the breeze of the cold air. Selena and I kept on talking and laughing. I felt sorry for her that I chose Merill rather than her. I wished it was Merill who I’m with now. And then Zeus lightning hit me hard, electricity surrounded my body and the cupids are surrounding me, waiting for my answer. It’s like Poseidon cleaned the sea that it was so clear. I, Ian Highmore, am officially in love with my best friend, Merill Hemsworth. At first, I thought it was just infatuation that I felt for her. I didn’t expect it will ascend to this level.
This is so wrong! Dear Cupid, don’t let me do what you did to Nico di Angelo!
“Sel, I need to tell you something important,” I said, turning my gaze to her.
She smiled. “Okay, go on. Spit it out,”
“Sel, you need to know that…” the words from my mouth are shattered because I was nervous. I ran a hand through my hair and covered my face. I’m extremely shaking and my hands are sweating.
“What’s wrong?” She looked at me, perplexed.
“Promise first. Promise me that nothing bad will happen after this, Sel—”
She stood up and so did I. “What do you mean?” she asked.
“I know that you love me, but I can’t love you back as the same as you love me. I love you, Sel, but only as a friend.”
Her eyes grew wide and tears slowly fell down to her cheeks. She didn’t bother to wipe it but she stared at me with anger. “Why, Ian?”
And then the words slipped out of my mouth. “I love someone else, Selena, I am so sorry.”
She looked at her feet. “Who is she?”
Another unexpected word came out, and it’s uncontrollable. “Merill,”
I tried to touch her but she moved back. I don’t know what she’s feeling, anger or sadness? I’m expecting this, and I want it to happen earlier as now before everything will be worse. And it’s better telling the truth than living with lies.
She turned her back to me. “You just asked me out to tell me this?” she cried, and this is not the Selena that I met. I never saw her like this before. “This is crap, Ian!”
I sighed, “Selena, believe me, I don’t want this to happen but I don’t want to hurt you!”
“Then why are you giving me hopes? Ian, all those things that happened to us was all games? You broke me!” She started to walk away but I held her wrist, not letting it go. I can’t let her go.
I walked in front of her kneeling. “I’m sorry, Sel! Please, don’t leave me!”
“Save it, Ian,” she sobbed.
“Just forgive me, please!”
“Forget it, Ian! Forget everything! We are nothing! I don’t want you to see me ever! We’re done!” She yelled, yanking her wrist from my grasp and ran away. I can hear her crying hard from afar.
There, I lost her, and if Merill will find out what happened, our friendship will be ruined. And it’s all because of me.
I walked to the parking lot. I kicked my car hard and leaned back in front. Selena don’t deserve this. I was such an idiot! Now, she hates me.
I drove as fast as I can. I was so angry at myself. Why can’t I love the girl who loves me? And why do I love a girl so hard even though I don’t deserve her. Those words Selena said stabbed my heart so hard that I can’t even hear it beating.
I stopped my car in front of a beach. I need fresh air to clear my thoughts. I don’t want to go home, I can’t face Merill. I looked at my phone and unlocked it, she just called me. My life is a complete mess right now, just because I was honest to a person. It’s really hard to forget when mistakes were already made. I can’t go back to the past, and I’m not even sure if I can fix this mess.
...
cynthnie.x