Okay readers! This messge is muy importante! Constructive critcism is okay, but really mean and harsh comments are not. I am a person. Not an alien. I have feelings. Respect them. Thanks a bunch.
"Walk." Alexx orders me.
"Okay?"
"Just do it."
I walk normally down the runway. We are at a modeling studio that Alexx's mother owns. They're not using it today, so Alexx brought me here. I don't know exactly why.
"Stop hobbling like the elderly." she scolds.
"Im not hobbling! I'm walking!" I defend myself.
"Trust me when I say that is not walking."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Youre so critical."
"Look Addison, do you want your sweet revenge? Summer is almost over!"
"Okay I get your poor Alexx."
"Good. Now, in order to track the straight male population's attention you must sway your hips."
"Like Im hulahopping?"
"Um... Sure. Whatever floats your boat. Now try again."
I walk again swaying my hips in huge montions.
"Ugh. That's too much. You look like a spaz. Watch and learn my swagger prodigee."
She walks slowly down the runway swaying her hips. I follow her and imitate her.
"Good. Now with these! Don't be afraid to blow a kiss or throw in a wink!" she gives me 4-inch stilletos. Oh my gosh. How am I supposed to walk normally much less sway in those?
I start to walk down the runway. I almost lose my balance a few times. I stumble a lot and I trip over nothing too.
"Again." Alexx tells me while shaking her head.
After hours of walking around in these death machines, Alexx is satisfied. My feet are absolutely killing me. Who even invented high heels? I hate them right now.
"Okay, to seduce a boy you also need to know all the right words to say."
"For instance...?"
"Hey."
"I say hey all the time. I must be a seductive master!"
"No you have to like whisper it in their ear softly. It makes them shiver and they get all nervous. Their heart will start beating super fast and they'll get sweaty palms and oh, it is just an amazing feeling to have power over the opposite gender!"
"I wouldn't know, but I'll take your word for it."
"Okay, another common thing you can say to seduce someone 'How's it goin babe?'"
"Thats really awkward Alexx."
"No it's not."
"Yes! Babe is a pig and I may not know that much in the seducing area as it turns out, but I do in fact know that calling someone a pig is not away to attract positive attention."
"No. It's not like Babe as in that piggy in the movies. It's and abbreviation for baby or something."
"Oh!" I say as the realization dawns on me.
Alexx continues to teach me some comments throughout the night. Cassie and Lily meet
us at Alexx's house later.
"Guys she is ready!" says Alexx showing the rare enthusiasm.
"And just in time for Tyler's party too!" says Lily.
"My ex, Tyler? I don't wanna see him."
"Oh come on! You can make him super jealous!" Cassie chimes in.
"I really don't know..." I say uncertainly.
"When we work our magic, they don't even have to know it is you." says Lily trying to encourage me to go to this party.
"Its like a test run." explains Cassie.
"Okay I guess." I say agreeing to what must surely be embarassment and failed attempts to be cool on my part.