It's been a week.
A whole 7 days and we still haven't talked.
Since Grayson and I weren't talking it really affected everyone in our group almost as if Madison and Blake had to pick a side. Which was hard on them since they were dating and all. As much as I didn't want to admit it, I was hurt. When I'm hurt, I do stupid things I didn't even mean. Such as flirting with Logan possibly to make Grayson even more pissed off or to feel as if I was hurting him the way he hurt me. But even if I didn't want to admit, he didn't really care or he didn't how it.
Cheer and football practices ran as they normally would. Somewhat anyways. I didn't talk to Grayson, but I still had to see him.
This Friday, we had our last game before Thanksgiving break. Catherine and my mother were going to some doctor convention in Hawaii, which seemed like a mini getaway for them. Then Amelia and Gillian were going on a school trip to Washington, DC.
I told my mom I would stay at Madison's house since I wasn't speaking to Grayson, but my nose should have grown like Pinocchio's. I would be staying home alone by myself for Thanksgiving break because really I didn't want to interact with anyone. In my house, Thanksgiving wasn't a huge deal, because my dad had football games. So we would usually order carry out or pizza. I didn't mind since I was so used to it.
But I would try my best and put on a fake happy show so I could go home and break down.
I stood in the school restroom adjusting my makeup with Madison.
"So are you ever going to tell me what's going on with you and Grayson?" She asked holding a face wipe
I held liquid eyeliner in my hands as I was about to apply it before she asked that question. "No. We're just not on the same page."
"You two are too good of friends to be arguing!" Madison projected using too many versions of two, too, and to in a sentence. Which made my head hurt.
"It's amazing how two people can be so perfect for each other, but they're both too scared to get hurt that they push each other away." She went on
I rolled my eyes at her as I started my contour and highlight routine.
"You know my Grandma Ruth always used to say this to my aunt." Madison said putting her makeup brush down "When a girl is used to being hurt, she won't know how it feels when a man starts to appreciate her, so she ends up pushing him away."
I thought about it. She was right, but it was too late and I was too scared. "I'm too scared, okay? I know you're right, but I just can't. I kissed him and he knows that I'm keeping something from him. But he knows it's something with him and I think he knows that I know!"
I sighed at myself in the reflection of the mirror. "That's kind of why I've been up Logan's ass. I wanted to ruffle Grayson's feathers a bit. I don't feel anything with Logan, but I do feel something with Grayson."
Shit. "Feel what?" Madison said grinning
"I don't like Logan and you know that. But you also don't know what exactly what happened with Grayson. It was messy. My heart broke after I realized what I did. I pushed him away and said a bunch of messy things." I vented with my voice trailing off at the end
"Are you realizing something?" Madison said closing her makeup bag
I nodded my head "Yeah I need to blend my contour line a little more."
"Something else?" Madison asked hitting my shoulder lightly
I could tell she wanted me to say something else, but was I going to? No, because I didn't know myself.
We grabbed our things and walked out of the restroom. My hair was in a ponytail with the huge bow, my makeup was done, and my uniform was on.
Game time.
Madison and I walked out to the field together along with the rest of the cheerleaders. Then to our normal spot we cheered at.
As all the cheerleaders started stretching, the boys were warming up. I made awkward eye contact with Grayson, butI looked away.
I wasn't going to get distracted, so I lead the team in warm ups. We warmed up jumps, stunts, and tumbling as our student section started filling in.
I saw a familiar face walk over to be as I drank water. I quickly closed the spout of my water bottle and placed it back on the ground.
"Hey cutie." Logan said smiling at me
I gave him a small smile. I wanted scream I don't like you like that! But I couldn't.
"Hi." I croaked
"Well just wanted to say hey before the game started. I'll talk to you after and then maybe go get ice cream after with the team?" He asked and told me
I nodded my head somewhat unsure. "Okay. Good luck."
Wrong answer. Cause I knew myself and I'd probably come up with some shitty excuse to get out of going. Like I have in the past week.
The game started and the other school had some aggressive tackling skills. Very strong, so strong that they could kill someone while trying to tackle them. Our team was holding their own trying to avoid getting hurt badly. Which I guessed worked, because when the first quarter was over we were winning by a few points.
We were minutes into the second quarter as I bent down to drink water. I heard a huge crash. But I assumed it was someone in the bleachers dropping something until I heard everyone stop cheering.
The student section went quiet, the cheerleaders went quiet, the band, even the parents.
I heard the coach blow the whistle like crazy. I closed the water bottle and stood up.
"Holy shit." Madison screamed as she covered her mouth "I think that's Grayson, Aspen."
An Ocean City High School football helmet was half way across the field from where the boy was laying. A helmet that had 13 on it, which was Grayson's number. My heart stopped and my hands started shaking. I ran on the field and in that moment I didn't even care. Until I felt a hand grab my wrist as I ran.
"Don't go over there, I swear." Logan ordered tightening his grip as I broke it
I looked into his brown eyes "That's my best friend and I don't care."
I ran to the middle of the field where Grayson was lying and no one was there. His eyes were closed, but his chest was rising up and down.
"Grayson! Can you hear me?" I loudly asked him
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He said groggily as he tried to find my hand.
"It's okay, okay?" I put my hand on his hand as his eyes closed
"Grayson! You better wake up!" I cried
He didn't say anything. Not, because he was mad. Because he blacked out. At this point, all the players were huddling around us as the coach called an ambulance.
"Peterson, go over there." The coach said trying to give him space
I shook my head "No, his mom is out of town. I'm the only person who can talk to her right now, so as far as I can see you need me."
"Okay well when the ambulance gets here, call me. I'll put his things in there unless you have a car?" The coach asked as I nodded "Well I'll put his things in your car. Tell his mom I think he may have a concussion or worse."
A concussion was familiar to me because while playing football my brother and dad have had at least four each or more in their lifetime. The coach followed me to my car and put Grayson's things in my trunk. I watched as he was loaded up into the ambulance which was something I never wanted to see.
"Update me, Peterson!" The football coach yelled as I nodded
I drove behind the ambulance the whole way there. I texted and called Catherine three times but there was no respond. It was 1:00pm in Hawaii and they were probably in a class.
When we go to the hospital, I lied and told them I was Grayson's sister. Just so I could go back there with him. They took him back for a some kind of scan, so I went into the bathroom to change. They were just clothes that were in my car. Which happened to be his sweatshirt and some leggings. I changed into that, took off all the cheer makeup , and put my hair into a bun.
God, please let him be okay.
When I walked out the bathroom they just wheeled him into the room in a wheel chair.
I had to wait two hours before I could even be with him.
"He has a very small concussion and there should be no severe effects. He might be a little tired and dizzy but that's it. You're free to go home." The female nurse said "I'll let you change in peace while I get your discharge papers."
I nodded "Thank you so much."
They all left the room and closed the door behind them. My phone started ringing and it was just who I thought it would be.
"Hello?" I greeted looking at Grayson
"Is he okay Aspen? Do I need to fly out now?" She asked worried
"I don't think so. The doctors said he has a very small concussion and that there would be no severe effects. Gray just might be tired and dizzy for a few days." I told her as I saw those beautiful ocean blue eyes
I put the phone away from my ear for a second. "Do you want to talk to your mom?"
He nodded as I handed him my phone.
"Hey mom."
"Yeah I'm fine. Just tired."
"No no. Enjoy time off. I have a high school nurse that can stay with me until you get back."
"I love you too good night."
Grayson handed my phone back as I put it up to my ear.
"Look Aspen don't let him do anything stupid. Don't let him be bossy either. Call me frequently. I love you good night!" Catherine said hanging up
I almost wished she hadn't so we wouldn't be left in awkward silence. I put my phone back in my lap and looked at him.
"What happened?" He asked looking back at me
"Well, you had the ball. The guy from the other school tackled the hell out of you, but your helmets clashed really badly. Your helmet flew half way across the field and you blacked out. Now we're here." I explained to him
He nodded. "When can I play again? Can I ever play again?"
"Doctor said two weeks, maybe. Yes you can play again my brother and dad have had quite a few. Just consider the first one in the book." I tried to lighten the mood
Grayson nodded as he looked me in the eye this time. "Did my mom make you come?"
"No! I actually care about you. No bad day or argument is going to change that." I said trying to reassure him
"God I was so stupid. I shouldn't have walked out." He stressed
I shook my head "Grayson, I was the stupid one. I shouldn't have taken everything out on you."
"I forgive you. How do you know I'm stressing?" He asked looking at me as I reached down into a bag
"Cause you're doing that thing. That thing with your fingers and eyebrows." I mimicked what he was doing as I handed him a pair of sweatpants, a shirt, his furry moccasins.
"Damn." Grayson smiled as he took the clothes "Are we still on for the wedding?"
Funny. We haven't talked in a week, but we also haven't missed a beat with each other.
"Yeah." I confirmed
"I'm so sorry Aspen, I - I didn't mean anything I said I was just really mad and confused with myself." He started "Please forget everything I said."
"I know, I think we're on the same boat. Clean slate. We're nothing like my parents and I'm so sorry for everything I did and said." I told him
He held out his hand ready to get out of the wheelchair. I took his hand as he squeezed it. He got out the wheelchair and walked to the bathroom.
"Don't look at my ass." Grayson smirked
But I took a peak "Damn Kim K."
He gave me the bird before he walked into the bathroom. The doctor came back and gave instructions for him to follow and things top help him heal. Once we were done, I got Grayson in my car and I drove to his house. His truck and Range Rover were in the drive way so I assumed Blake drove him to school.
"Are you not going to your house to get clothes?" Grayson asked
"How did you know I wasn't going to just drop you off?"
Grayson shrugged his shoulders "That's not you. That's not us."
I smiled as I turned off my car. "I'll go in the morning. Come on let's get you upstairs in bed."
We walked inside the house and I escorted Grayson upstairs into his room and unmade the bed and set the pillows up the way he liked them. He got into the bed and under the cover.
"Are you hungry?" I asked as I pulled out the discharge papers
He nodded "I'd like Kraft mac and cheese and a cup of lemonade."
"No driving for twenty four hours, rest quietly for the day, take simple painkillers such as paracetamol for any headache. Check the packet for the right dose. Arrange for someone to stay with you for the next 24 hours, in case you need help. Avoid alcohol for at least 24 hours and should be woken every four hours to check their condition and their reaction to familiar things." I read to him
"And I'll go fix your food prince." I told him as I placed the book on the end table "You're not supposed to read, watch tv, listen to music, or text for a few hours. I'll be back in a bit just think about life. Don't stress."
"Ok princess." He closed his eyes "In rest mode."
"Do you want a Tylenol or something?" I asked Grayson
Grayson shook his head. "I'm good for right now."
I walked down the stairs to the kitchen. I knew where everything was already and I started making what Grayson requested. It took under fifteen minutes. I also fixed him a cup of Simply Lemonade. I walked back into his room where he was sitting up and waiting. I put the lemonade on the end table while I set up the bed tray and then placed his food on it.
"Thanks. Could you turn on a lamp? This moonlight isn't my favorite." He requested and I did
I walked around to the other side of the bed and laid down next to him while he ate. And I just stared at him.
He then noticed and looked at me looking at him. "Why are you staring at me?"
"I've just missed you." I said shyly
"I'm flattered." He smiled finishing the last of his Mac and Cheese and put the tray on the ground.
Grayson got up and walked into his bathroom to brush his teeth. When he was done, he turned off the light and left us in the dark.
I put a pillow in between us as he got into bed. He was facing me as he laid down and I could hear him breathing.
"Is there something you wanna tell me?" Grayson asked me as he put his hand on top of my hand
"I just don't want the kiss or the hickey or the fight to change anything and please don't let it. Let's just keep moving forward. That's what I've been keeping from you." I finally confessed
He rubbed my hand "I'm not mad. I'm not letting it change anything, much. Not in a bad way at least. Goodnight."
I'm not letting it change anything, much. Not in a bad way at least.
What's the good way?
Four hours later when I woke up to check on Grayson, I noticed that the pillow I put between us was on the floor.
Instead, Grayson had on of his arms draped over me.
"Grayson." I spoke softly as I nudge him
"Hmm?" He answered
I looked over at me, "Are you feeling okay? Do I really need to ask you questions?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. I have a little sister named Gillian, your name is Aspen, it's technically Saturday now. Am I bothering you?" He spoke lowly
I turned my bodies towards him and he kept his arm draped over me.
"No, go back to sleep." I said closing my eyes
This was the good way - at least in my mind.