Kyle Redmond P.O.V
Yesterday Mr.Brown had called me to let me know that Paisley had accepted the offer.
I was on cloud nine! I just wanted to go and hug her close to me, but the sensible side in me stopped me from doing that.
I went ahead and rang Pasiley's doorbell, she dosen't know that I would be coming this morning.
"Morning Paisley!" I said with a small smile when she opened the door. She stood there expressionless not uttering a word looking at me with blank ice cold eyes.
"Um.. please can I come in?" I asked clearing my throat.
She did not say anything, just turned around and went inside without a word.
"They are sleeping. I have to go late today for work. Take them if you want." She said without looking at me while entering the kitchen.
"Oh okay." I replied.
Moments of silence passed between us and it was becoming unbareable for me. I want her to yell at me, but not stay silent like this. I know I am in no position to deserve even her words of disrespect, but I want her to talk.
She started to assemble ingredients for breakfast. After collecting everything she needed, she tied her hair in a messy bun, washed her hands and started to cook.
All that time I was sitting in the kitchen, but she acted as if I as invisible, this was becoming too much for me to handle. I decided to walk close to her and apologise.
I was close enough to still have a safe distance between us.
"Paisley?" I tapped on the shoulder.
"What?" She stiffened for a second and then shrugged her shoulder removing my hand away.
"Can you please look at me? I will at a distance from you can talk." I said pathetically.
The response from her was absolute silence.
"Paisy please, just listen!" I pleaded.
She still remained quiet and continued to cook.
I sighed and walked back to the stool I was sitting on earlier.
When she was done, she turned off the stove and walked outside the kitchen, but I quickly caught her hand.
"Leave.My.Hand.Kyle!" She said each word through gritted teeth slowly.
"I will, baby. Just listen to me once, I won't take much of your time." I said turning her around gently.
"You have been constantly invading my personal space, Mr.Redmond! Leave my hand this second! I won't allow you to treat me like what you had called me." She threatened and the blazing anger in the eyes could burn me alive.
"I know, Paisy. I know that being close to you without your consent time and again is not right, but please just once hear me out. You really need to known this." I tried to convince her.
"Look, I don't have time for your nonsense! Leave my hand else get out of my house without the twins." Paisley threatened in a serious voice.
"Okay-okay." I said leaving her hand. "Now please just listen to me." I told her.
"I won't and I don't need to. It's better if you stay away from me, I will get Ryder and Noah ready and you will leave after that." She said and started to walk to the staircase.
"Wait right there, Paisley! You have to listen to me, else I will follow you everywhere you go until you are ready to listen. Even if I have to come to your workplace and sit outside. This would create a scene and I am sure you wouldn't want that." I said.
"Ten minutes that's all you have to finish your crap!" She said giving a death glare.
"Thank You. Now, I know the past days have been very stressful for you and all because of me. The way I have treated you, kissing you, getting close to you was inappropriate. But in my defence, I want to be with you, I want us to get back together.
I have made horrible and unforgivable mistakes in the last couple of years and the last few days, and I truly feel ashamed of it. Everybody deserves a chance, Paisley, even I do. I may sound selfish, but that's what I am! I am like that! The only time in my life I was considerate towards others was when you were with me. Being without you has been the most painful time for me.
All the things I had said and done all those years back, were and are meaningless. I was only high on rage! I know I have stooped down to the lowest level possible, but that was because I wanted revenge. The revenge which I had been wanting since the time I was a teenager!
I grew up like that, with my mind constantly surrounded by the thoughts of getting even. Believe me, the night I had thrown you out of the house in the middle of the night was the end of me. I have just been existing for the past years, not living. All the time I had called you inappropriate words that night was hurting me more than it was hurting you. You don't know how much I wanted to get you back inside the house when I had seen you crying outside the whole night. The time I had left you money and jobless was cheapest move I could play! But I had to do it, I had to because I needed you to hate me. Hate me, so that you can move on and be with someone else who will keep you happy. Each day without you was and is meaningless.
Seven months after you left I had started looking for you, I didn't know you had left London till that time. I have had the best P.I's to look for you, for the last four years and finally I found you now! Each day when they would tell me the same thing that they couldn't get any trace of you, had my heart bleeding. I prayed for you to be fit and fine, for you to be alive. The thought for your death made me sob. That day in the café when you had told me that you had tried to kill yourself twice, left me with fear. Fear of loosing you forever! I don't want to lose you, love.
Sure, there are ample number of differences between us which will stop you from coming back to me again, but we have to work them out. We will work them out together! No couple is perfect and neither are we, but that's was is needed in a relationship, right Everything cannot be like a bed of flowers, there are thorns present. And these thorns or problems as you may say, help us become more strong, help us to know each other better. To be one another's strenght and constant pillar of support.
I am not trying to manipulate you as your friend says, I am just merely trying to explain my mistakes to you from my perspective, sweetheart. All my words and justifications may seem fake and a game to you, and I do not blame you for it.
You have all the right in this world to hate me and I am not complaing. But I want to make this very clear that I will not stop or crib till the time I will earn your love, trust and you back! All I want in my life is you and our children, for us to be like and normal, loving and complete family. I am not asking for your forgiveness, because that is not possible for you. I am asking for another chance to prove myself worthy of you and the kids. Forgiving me will not be easy at all and I don't even mind if you don't, but please just comeback to me, darling. Give me one last and final chance to prove myself and restoring our marriage. I love you, baby! I need you with me sweetheart, please give me a chance." I said looking into her eyes that held no trace of any emotion whatsoever. Infront of me was a standing a woman with a blank face and cold eyes that were a mirror to her soul.
Paisley stayed quiet for a while and eventually spoke to my utter surprise.
"I don't want to have a discussion with you on this, but I will, to make things clear. Whatever you did to me is unforgetable. I had trusted you the most, you knew everything about me and how much faith I had in you, but still you did what you had to do.
You standing here giving me justifications, that all you did was because you were blinded by the need for revenge is not acceptable. Tell me, was I involved anywhere in the thing that forced you to do this? I wasn't even aware of what had happened to you! You had always known that, but still you went ahead with your motive and determination to get even, and you did!
If you would have loved me, Kyle, you would never do that no matter what, instead you would have come and talked to me about the issues you were facing, the things that were bothering you, but you didn't. I had always stood by your side, I trusted you blindly, I did all my duties as a wife. I felt happy doing them, I felt happy being with you. All I wanted in return was nothing but true commitment and affection from your side, and you failed to give that to me.
My family, my friends were always so open and accepting towards you, they trusted you with me. But what did you do, huh, Kyle? You did not even show any regard to them. You still did all those horrific things to me when you claimed you loved me! Now, when things are so complex how can you even expect me to believe anything you say? Do you think it's fair to me and to my kids? I will not stop you from seeing Noah and Ryder till the time I feel your intentions atleast towards them are right and true, but the moment I feel you are messing with them, I will forbid you from seeing them. Get that very clear! They do deserve a father and they will have one, only if you do not cause any harm to them.
I probably will forgive you for everything you've put me through as the time passes, but I will never ever forget what you did to me. I cannot give you another chance, please do not come to me again and again asking for it. Seeing you everyday is already very difficult for me. I want to have a civil relation with you for the sake of my kids, so do not do things that will even ruin the chance for it.
As far as restoring our marriage is concerned it will not happen. I don't want to be with you! It has already caused me alot of misery which I do not wish to experience again. And the your theory of flowers and thorns is complete rubbish! Because we never had those flowers between us, it was only an illusion created by you for me to believe. You always had that plan of yours in mind, never were your feelings for me genuine and true. So, just stop with those fake words of yours. I have made myself clear on this issue and I don't want to have this futile conversation again." She said looking at me blankly once again.
By the time she finished tears pricked my eyes. I could actually feel only some part of her suffering.
She turned around to go upstairs and but I again caught her.
"I know it will be difficult, but I am ready to do anything you want me to! I cannot live without you, Paisy, I just can't. You want time? Take all you want, but please don't walk away from me. I have never faked my feelings for you! I had loved you back then, I loved you for the years you were away from me and I still do love you wholeheartly! What we had between us, was not an illusion! It was the pure truth! I have always been proud of the fact that you were and still are my wife. I love you, Paisley! All I want is another chance, please give me this once. If after that you don't feel things between us can work out, you are free to leave me at that point of time. Just please give me a chance, I beg you!" I said my vision bluring with tears as I held both her hands in mine.
"I still do not believe you! If you would have loved me, you would come that night taking me back inside the house, you wouldn't have made me sign the divorce papers by fooling me. I did everything I could to save us from the damage, Kyle. I went down on my knees, I begged, I cried, I apologized even when I wasn't at fault!All this because I loved you and I wanted to spend my life with you! I tried everything possible in my hands to stop us from falling apart, but you tried everything you could to break me, break us. I have now gone past that stage of trusting you and being emotionally attached to you. Anything you do or say, will not change my decision about ending this marriage. You have to respect it, you do not have any other choice! Now, I'll go and get the kids ready, take them out and be a good and responsible father to them."
With this she walked upstairs away from me leaving me hurting badly and wondering if I had lost her forever.
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Hey Babies!
I wanted to show both their feelings. A determined, strong Paisley and a gulity, fearing Kyle. I hope it came out clearly as intended to.
Please share your opinion and suggestions about the story with me. It is actually very helpful.
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Until next time:)