-Andrew Peterson-
She held her hand over her mouth trying to muffle her sobs. Her wolf howled from within her, she felt it. The pain was excruciating, a pain she would associate with being rejected. He never said anything about rejection, but she felt it. When she walked down the steps out the back door of the pack house she didn't care if she woke the whole pack up. She had so much pain building up inside of her and she needed to let it out. The only way she thought how.
Taking a deep breath, she inhaled and then yelled out as loudly as she could. Until there was no breath left in her lungs. She breathed in, imagining bunching all of her sadness into a ball and then with another scream she let it out again. Imagining her pain leaving her as the air left her body. When she was done screaming she laid down on the grass, staring up at the moon. She'd never felt so alone in the world.
Not knowing much about the mechanics of werewolves put her at a disadvantage. She wasn't brought up in this world, having a mate was still so new and so fresh to her. The emotions that came with it. Not knowing what it all entailed, she wanted to complete the mating process with Jake. She wanted to experience being complete with him.
Her hand came up to cut the refreshed mark on her neck. It felt tender to the touch. Part of her was angry. She wanted to tear it off, to be rid of it. But she wouldn't. The mark was all she had of Jake, Elizabeth had the rest of him. She couldn't imagine anything else being the reason he was holding back.
In a moment of weakness, she wished for her mom. To have her hold her close and be with her. She didn't remember much of her mom, but she knew her mom was a loving person. She was getting ready to stand up when the back door opened. Her heart leapt in her chest and she hoped it was Jake. She was disappointed to see it was Alexa, his mother.
"Ethan woke to the sound of shouting. When he realized it was you, he woke me." She spoke softly, coming to sit next to her on the ground, wearing a thin wrap to cover the pajamas she was wearing. "What's going on?" She wrapped a single arm around Andrew, pulling her close against her side. Andrew worried about talking about Alexa's son to her but a little thought in the back of her head was convincing her this was her mother's doing. Since she couldn't be here she'd sent Alexa.
"It's Jake." She was quiet at first, picking at the grass, pulling up single strands one at a time. "H...he hesitated." She felt the tears filling her eyes again from speaking it aloud, but she quickly blinked them away. "He wouldn't mate with me. It...well it isn't the first time it's happened either. Pushed me away when I've tried. I'm afraid...what if he tries to reject me?" She covered her mouth to hide the quiver of her lips.
"Oh honey..." Alexa's voice was very soothing and soft, her hand running up and down Andrew's arm. "I know it isn't something you may want to hear, but for him, he's survived losing a mate, just like his father. Most werewolves don't even survive the death of their mate. Its why Alpha's are so protective of their own." She was silent for a few moments, Andrew thinking over her words in her head. "Losing a mate is probably something you'll never experience. He's just afraid, that's all. He has a lot of things to consider, including the fact that the first time he'd gotten close with Elizabeth she'd been killed. He doesn't want to go through something like that again."
"I can protect myself though..." Andrew started to protest but Alexa shushed her softly.
"Ethan was the same way with me. He was very wary at first. It took him a while to come around to me and he wasn't ready to commit at the same time I was. It took him longer to open up to me. Longer than it took me to open up to him." Alexa's hand moved to her hair, slowly brushing through it. "You should go back to bed. If there's one thing I know for sure, my son loves you tremendously. But just like he's given you, you need to give him time. He'll come around eventually."
"I will." Andrew felt better after being comforted by Alexa, her words sticking with her even after they parted way, back to their bedrooms. Andrew pushed open the door to Jake's room and tried to quietly push the door shut, only letting the handle turn when she heard the click of it shutting. Turning back to the bed she checked to make sure Jake was still asleep before shuffling into the bed.
As she settled her head against the pillow she felt him shifting to get comfortable, then she was being pulled back against him. "I'm sorry." The words met her ear and for a moment she allowed herself to be comfortable in his arms, sleep starting to pull her under.
--
When she woke, she was alone, clinging to her pillow. Jake was gone, and the room was empty. She felt a hole in her stomach, something in her life was missing. The events from the night before played in her mind. Clutching the front of her shirt, she tried to stop the pain from reaching her heart, but it did. She hadn't been rejected, so she hung on to that one thing. Clung to it for dear life. But she still hurt after all this time; after everything that had happened to the two of them, how hard he'd worked to get her and now he was pushing her away.
She wanted to see Matt. Maybe today she would. Getting up from bed she slowly made her way into the closet. When she finished getting ready, even though her heart was still tender, she made her way down stairs. She'd only see the cells once. They were much like her own back home. Located in the same spot in the house, the lowest floor with only two exits, one into the house and the other to the outside. But the one to the outside was deadbolted closed for obvious reasons.
Her journey down was abruptly stopped when she heard his voice coming down the hall. She wanted to his but felt stuck at the sound of his voice. When he came into view, a phone was held up to his ear. "Yes, I understand that sir." He hadn't noticed her yet, she still had time to hide. Her heart pounding in her chest like it would burst out.
Her feet wouldn't move, it wasn't until he was only feet in front of her that he looked up and stopped. She could hear the voice on the other line speaking rather loudly, but she tried not to listen it. His mouth was agape for a moment, then he smiled. "Yes sir, I completely understand. Something just came up, I'm going to have to call you back." He didn't wait for a response as he ended the call. The phone getting shoved into his pocket. "Andrew...I was just coming to look for you." His eyes held pain in them and fear down her legs, making her knees weak. "We need to talk about last night." He took a step towards her and she slipped past him quickly.
"I don't want to talk about it." She hugged herself, looking down at the floor as she continued her way to cellar.
"Andrew!" Hearing her name on his lips made her arms wrap tighter around herself. She'd never felt so weak in the face of him. "I'm sorry." She stopped at his words.
"You already said that. I don't need to hear it again, okay?" Her voice shaking, she tried to move faster, needed to hide the tears that threatened to spill once again. She hated how much she'd cried lately. Almost every day she felt like she was crying about one thing or another. When she felt his hand grab her elbow she stopped, letting his turn her towards him. "Just save me the pain. Get it over with." Her voice was raspy, weak. She was weak.
"The pain of what? I'm not going to hurt you, Andrew." He let her elbow go and this time she didn't try to run. If rejection was what she was getting, she was as ready as she'd ever be.
"If you're going to reject me then just get it over with." Her voice much softer now, she felt herself falling to her knees, weak. So weak. He would never want a mate as weak as she was.
Then he was holding her up, his arms pulling her close. "Andrew." His voice sounded broken and she felt her eyes close tightly, preparing for whatever words he would say next. "I could never reject you. I'm so sorry I made you feel that way." She thought his voice sounded thick with emotion. Relief washed over her, a new set of tears washing her face. "I just wanted to apologize for last night. I was...I am such an idiot." His hand found her neck, tilting her head back to look up at him. "I only want you Andrew." His lips pressed tenderly against her, but not long enough before he was speaking again.
"I couldn't ever want anyone else. I was so stupid for letting my emotions about Elizabeth keep me from you. But I couldn't mate with you with the thoughts of her so fresh on my mind. If we're going to mate I only want to think about you, and me. Nothing else." She tried to hide her blushing face against his chest, but he held her neck in place. "I love you, Andrew. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever met and don't ever forget that." His lips pressed against hers again and she relished in the feeling of his love. All thoughts of rejection and sadness melting away.
His kisses were longing but quick. Like he'd been gone for a long time and he couldn't get enough of her. "I shouldn't have let you walk away last night. It broke me seeing how much I was hurting you." He whispered, pushing her against the wall, her back hitting hard. His hands found her thighs, picking her up, her legs wrapped around his waist.
A moan escaped up her throat from deep within as her mate finally really touched her. His hands brushing against the skin under her shirt. She felt him push them up the stairs, his foot slipping on the top step.
When they fell, one of his arms came around her, his other going out to catch them. She felt him against, hard against her thigh and pushed against him. "I will take you on these stairs, Andrew. I've made my wolf wait too long for you. I waited too long." He ground out through clenched teeth. She felt herself crawling out from under him, though he was quite reluctant at first. Then she was pulling him along, to their bedroom.
The moment they were through the door she felt him pulling her back against him, his hands pressing flat against her stomach, pushing her shirt up for skin to skin. His lips came down against her neck, tracing up and down, kissing as he went. She felt his lips against her like butterfly wings, sending shivers down her body, making her knees weak. "Jake." She breathed his name, he was torturing her.
Turning in his arms, her hands started pushing his shirt up over his head, throwing it off. She kissed him fiercely, letting her cold fingertips trail his chest to his stomach, stopping at the waistline of his pants. When he shivered against her touch, it pushed her further. After undressing herself to only her bra and underwear, she pushed her hands into his hair, pulling on the ends of it. She felt the rumble in his chest, he was pushing her back into the bed. Climbing atop her. Watching her marvel in his body as she yearned for his touch. To feel his fingers against her skin. To feel the warm pressure of him against her.
With a frustrated moan, she pushed herself up against his body. "Touch me." She begged, her nails digging into his skin, her back arching, asking for his touch. When his fingers met her bare waistline, she gasped at the sensation.
He kissed her jawline, then her neck. His thumb pressed into her hip, holding her body still as she squirmed under him. "You are mine, Andrew." He growled, and she felt his words all the way to her core.
His face pressed against her neck, "Say it." He whispered, his sweet lips touching the sweet spot where his mark was. Her nails in his back pushed him further, making him kiss and lick his mark more. She opened her mouth to say it but instead a moan escaped. She felt the corners of her vision blackening from the pleasure. His hands pushed behind her back, unclasping her bra quickly before tossing it aside. She'd been naked in front of him before, but for the first time she felt conscious about it.
She'd always been confident, she'd never had a reason not to be. Before her thoughts could turn south his mouth was moving down towards her breast. "Say it." He demanded again. "Tell me you're mine." The overwhelming sensation dissipating anything she'd been thinking before. Her body pushed up into his hand wherever they roamed, wanting to be closer. She touched too, excited, her wolf begging for him. To make him hers officially, and to really be his.
"I am yours." Her voice was begging for him. She watched his head lift, eyes meeting hers as they shaded all the black. His wolf was taking control. He wouldn't stop his wolf and she wouldn't stop hers as they made sweet love. Their auras and wolves together forever. Finally, their mating bond was complete.