Logan's POV
I don't know what to do right now. I don't know if I should stay with my family or if I should leave and try to find District Thirteen and the rebels? Dad can't handle the bar by himself if Cato doesn't come back from the Games alive. I have to be honest with myself right now. Cato is most likely going to be the one that's coming home from the Games, but will he really be coming home from them? He's head over heels in love with Clove Greenleaf. He won't be able to get through everything with her gone. He won't stop beating himself up if she dies in there. Fuck, he's off with her right now! She has him wrapped around his finger and neither of them realizes it yet. They're just letting it happen.
Andrea won't be too happy if I go with the group that's leaving tonight. She'll want to come with me, if I think about it long enough. She might not want to and want to protect her family here the entire time. But if she stays, she's at risk for the Peacekeepers questioning her about where I am. She'll crack under the pressure and there's a chance that we won't be far enough away to stall the Peacekeepers or to have protection from them. I don't know what she'll do if she ends up being the reason that I get caught and possibly killed. If I don't get killed then I'd most likely be getting tortured until they decide to kill me.
But then again I won't be too happy with myself if I don't take the chance now and leave with them. I doubt that there's going to be another group that's from Two anytime soon. They all have it too good here at the moment. It'll never end up with Two having the most troops for the rebellion. If it changes, then chances are it'll just be people that drop from training to be a Peacekeeper or don't get picked for the Games. Even then, Thirteen won't trust them as much. We're one of the lapdogs of the Capitol, the other one being District One. We give the Capitol the lifestyle that they want and they take care of us with extra goods and resources.
"Logan?" Andrea knocked on my bedroom door and pushed it open slowly. She was worried about me. I could tell because she as here instead of training.
"Yeah, Drea?" I propped myself up slowly on my elbow and look over at her. She rolled her eyes and came into the room, shutting the door behind her.
"You know that I can't stand when you call me that. It's not cute at all." She kicked off her shoes and crawled into the bed next to me. She laid on her stomach next to me and propped herself up on her elbows.
"I like it though. I think that it's just adorable," I laid back down and looked at her quietly. Her blue eyes looked like doe eyes as she just watched me.
It was a while before either of us spoke again and for what seemed like hours we just laid there next to each other. She was worried for me and didn't know what else she could really do but just lay here next to me. It seemed like she just had the plan of waiting for me to talk about joining the rebels. It wasn't safe here to actually talk about that here though. Not unless we go down to the bar and sit close to a speaker. She just continued to stare at me and began to crack her knuckles like she did when she was anxious about something. I sighed and sat up in the bed, giving her a look. She got out of bed with me and stole a pair of my slippers. I grabbed a hoodie and slippers before heading down the stairs to the bar. Andrea wasn't going to leave before I told her everything that she wanted to know. I sat down by one of the speakers and she sat across from me, crossing her arms slightly. She really wasn't going to give up anytime soon about this. And I can't expect her to either, she's my everything and I'm sure that I mean a lot to her. A lot more that I'll ever know if I leave tonight.
"Drea... I..." I sighed and shook my head a little bit, looking at her. "Can you not give me that look? It's making it even harder for me to tell you what I have to tell you right now."
She gave a huff before leaning back in the seat and looking away from me for a few moments. Her eyes came back to mine and she gave me a stern look for a few moments. I couldn't figure out a single thing that she was thinking about and it was beginning to worry me. The music was loud as it began to stream out of the speaker from a song that one of the patrons put on. I don't even want to know what it was as I stared at her. Her wide doe eyes looked so innocent and even a little expectant of me to tell her everything. I swear that there even was a little bit of fear behind them. It was faint, but it was there the entire time.
"You better not be dumping me, Hadley. I won't let it happen," she shook her head and I cracked a small smile. She was really only thinking about that?
"Don't worry, it's not that. But it is something that's pretty serious and I need you to swear that you won't tell a single soul and that you will let me finish before you but in and try to say something. Okay?" I rose an eyebrow slightly at her as I slide into the seat across from her. My elbows rested against the table as I rubbed at my eyes, trying to think of a way to word that I was leaving for Thirteen before dawn. I had to make my move tonight. I needed to join the rebels well before the Reapings in order to have a chance at getting my family and loved ones out of Two. Heck, I'll even try to get the Greenleafs out.
"I don't care. I need you to tell me whatever it is right now. It's pissing me off that you're acting so weird about whatever it is you're hiding from me. I thought that we don't keep secrets from each other, babe." Andrea frowned at me and gave me a slight glare at the end of it. I let out a sigh and rubbed at my eyes even more. I wanted to just lay down with here again and hold her closer.
"Andrea, I've been in contact with the rebels from Thirteen for a while now. They want me to head out there now and get started on the training as soon as possible. Which mean, they want me out there within the next few days. I'm leaving before dawn comes tomorrow." I looked up at her and frowned slightly when she just stared at me blankly for a while. It was like she didn't know what to say to me.
"When are you going?" Her eyes looked away from me and it was clear she was doing her best to just process the fact that I was going off to join the rebels that were starting to grow more and more in numbers each day. It took me a few moments to consider if I was even going. It would mean that Cato and my entire family would be put at risk. It would mean that she would be put at risk... Did I want to go just so I could help fight in a way that can end up getting me killed? Am I even confident enough in myself to travel across the nation without getting caught by Peacekeepers on the way to Thirteen? I don't see how likely that's going to be. We don't send that many people out to the further Districts until it gets around the day of the reaping. It was still a few days away. I had a chance at reaching Thirteen before every District was swarming with Peacekeepers. But once they realize that I'm gone, I'm screwed. They'll be sending search party after search party to hunt me down and bring me back. They'll go as far as using my family and Andrea to draw me out of hiding. I can't go to the rebels and then leave. They could see that as an act of treason and throw me into a jail cell then forget about me. I really won't be able to make sure that Andrea stays safe after that then... Am I willing to put the lives of everyone I love on the line just to fight to end the Games?
"I don't know... It would be a few weeks before the reaping though. I would need to give myself enough time to get to Thirteen before the reaping. It won't be long before the District and the trainers at the Academy notice that I'm not there. I'll need to be far enough away so that it'll take them a few days to organize a search party of any kind. I just don't know if I'm willing to risk putting everyone here in even more danger by going. They'll be going after you to draw me out. To get me killed..." I sighed softly and looked down at the table, trying to make up my mind before she had the chance to insist that she comes with me. It was oddly quiet on her side of the table, but her hand reached across to hold onto mine.
"You going is enough for me. Some of us are at risk one way or another with our names being in that reaping bowl. Even with the tributes and volunteers having been decided for this year. Things can always change if something happens that doesn't go the way that the Peacekeepers want it to go. You need to look past that and realize that you'll be taking the chance to end the Games by going to fight with them. You'll give us a chance to have a life together. To have a family together once we're no longer forced to train everyday of our lives up until the moment that we make it through our last reaping of our lives. You need to go. Don't tell anyone else. Leave during the weekend. I'll give them a reason to be looking the other way when you go." She gave my hand a squeeze before leaning across the table. Her lips touched mine for a brief moment. It felt like mere moments before she pulled away and stood up from the table.
"Are you sure about this? You'll be in danger just for loving me... I don't want you to go through that. I don't want any of you to go through that." I stood up with her and she smiled at me.
"Of course. I'm positive. You make it sound like none of us have the same training as you. I can fend for myself and I'm sure as hell that Cato'll be able to do the same. Everyone here will be fine and can fend for themselves. You go and help to put an end to all of this." Her voice was soft as she hugged me tightly. It felt like we had been married for years with the way that she was telling me not to be afraid of taking the greatest risk there could be of joining the rebels in Thirteen.
"Ms. Smith... You're wanted at the Mayor's house immediately." Joseph, the head of the Peacekeepers stood before us and his gaze was cold while he looked on in disgust of the two young kids that were showing a sign of affection in a public place.
"Of course. I'll go grab my..." She trailed off when she noticed the look that Joseph was giving her. "Or I can just leave it upstairs until I get back." She nodded and gave me a brief kiss on the cheek before heading towards the door.
"I would think that the younger brother of someone with the honor of being the volunteer this year would be obeying the laws a little more closely than you have been lately. We're watching you, Logan Hadley." Joseph turned and left as suddenly as he had came, taking Andrea with him. She had turned back to look at me before being ushered out of the front door.
I hated the laws that said no public affection. It didn't make you weak. It built you up more than anyone could possibly understand. People had turned to look at me from where they were sitting throughout the bar. It was for only a few seconds before they all looked away, but Father kept his eye on me. He was waiting for me to snap and say something that could get me tied to the post and whipped in the town square that very instant. I need to bite my tongue until I had the chance to fight for everything that I couldn't stand in this country. Panem was run by a dictator that needed to be overthrown by the people. I waited for Father to look away before cracking my knuckles to calm myself down. I'm going to fight in this war... I'm going to make sure that Andrea never has to be summoned at random. I know that she needs my protection, but she told me that she could handle herself. She also told me that she would be the distraction that I needed to escape the District and start the journey to Thirteen
My eyes drifted off to the contact that I had with the rebels in Thirteen and I gave him a slight nod, confirming that I was going back with him when he left. He barely showed the sign of acknowledgement before taking a sip of his beer again. I headed upstairs to the house and ran a hand through my hair, trying to think of how I was going to make it there alive.