oh my god, chapter 13 already... I DIDN'T EVEN BLOODY REALISE. I originally had this book planned out to be 20 chapters but... Lol.
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Ben looked stunned and irritated at the same time, and all I could do was grin. I was grabbing my coat when I was ambushed by Wendy, who literally tore the coat from my hands and hung it back up.
"Hon, you just got here! What's the hurry?"
"Oh.. Stuff to do, people to see. After all, it is Christmas Eve..." I lied.
Her fiancé came from behind her a shoved a piece of paper in my face. I had to lean back slightly so that I was able to see the entire page.
"Carnations or peonies?" She asked hopefully. "We can't seem to choose."
"I don't think he cares-" Ben started, but I quickly cut him off.
"Uh... Peonies, but they're super expensive, right? Don't you want to use that extra money for something else?" I asked. I only knew this because Marcia likes Peonies, and whenever I ordered a batch of them to deliver to her house, I always noticed that they were the priciest of all.
"I know a friend of a friend whose made a good offer." She said, smiling. The happy couple walked back inside the room they came from. It looked like a study room and through the door of that room, I could see another room with a drum set.
My lips were still tingling from that small kiss Ben and I shared. Could it even count as a kiss? I mean, it lasted for a millisecond and I didn't mean anything by it, I just thought it would piss him off. Sometimes however, I just felt as if I wanted nothing more than to just go up to him and kiss him again. What was my problem? Were my feelings resurfacing again? Oh dear, that's not a good thing.
Then again, I don't feel all warm inside like I used to whenever I caught his eyes in the school corridors or across the classroom, and I didn't blush or feel a little coy and playful, so I guess I'm safe for now.
"Are you ok? You've been staring at that ornament for a while now..." Ben said, scaring me slightly as his voice shattered my incessant thoughts.
I looked to said ornament, noticing a small turquoise boat with 'Matthews' engraved on it in white calligraphy. It looked quite cool actually.
"I'm good." I said quietly and a little awkwardly too. Isn't he going to say anything about the kiss?
I scrutinised my hands, noticing I was still carrying the mistletoe. I handed it over to him with a gulp and he took it and put it on top of the doorway beside another one.
"Tasha likes those." He commented, "that's why we have so many."
"Mhm." I shifted in my place, remembering I actually bought a gift for Ben at the shopping centre. I snickered to myself. Did I really do that? "Hey where's Ember?"
"Lost her already?"
"No... I know she came in the house. I just don't know where to look because I've never been here before."
"I think she might've went upstairs with Casey." He shrugged, "you can go look if you want, just follow the shouting and screaming."
I laughed. Casey and Harry had been going back and fourth for the past couple minutes. I don't know what on earth they were doing, but it sounded like an argument by the raised voices and tone.
"Okay." I said, grabbing the handrail and carefully walking up the stairs. The last thing I wanted to do was fall backwards and hit into Ben since he was walking up behind me.
The upstairs looked nice. It was spacious and had a painted pictures all over the walls. The hallway stretched quite far and there were two doors on one wall and then three on the opposite side.
Apparently your bedroom speaks a ton about your personality and I thought about all the endless possibilities of how Ben's room looked like. Was he messy? Clean? What about the walls? Were they filled up with posters or photographs? Was Ben secretly a decoration hoarder? I know that if I had some, I'd would put fairy lights everywhere.
I could hear the shouts coming from a room on the right but as I got closer, I was sure that they were having an argument, so I placed a hand on the door handle and pushed the door open, only to see Harry and Casey playing Top Trumps.
It's like they didn't even notice I was stood there. Casey was too busy arguing about how one of her cards had the 'Bravery' of 70 so it clearly beats Harry's card.
"Your sister is.. Fiesty." Ben commented as I closed the door again.
"Shut the hell up about my sister." I joked, shoving his chest. He stumbled back a few steps and I smiled in content.
One if the doors were open a little and all I couple see from the gap was a bed with black bed sheets and Ember laying on it. I walked over to it, only to be stopped by Ben, who used his entire frame to block the door. He closed it and sheepishly grinned.
I gave him a pointed look and glared, but my glares were nowhere as scary or as intimidating at his. "What's so secretive that's in that room?"
"Ill get Ember, you wait here." he said, ignoring my question. My curiosity peaked and I tried to push him out the way, but he would barely budge.
"You've seen my room, why can't I see yours?"
"It's messy." he waved off.
"Messy? Come on, yours can't be as messy as mine. You've seen it, it's practically a shithole." At this point, I was beginning to get pissed off. I crossed my arms over his chest as he chewed on his lip and still refused to budge. I stood to the side of him and tried to budge him again but of course, he fought back.
"Come on!" I exasperated. "I'm just going to believe you have a shrine of me in there, and that's why you don't want me looking."
He just smirked and stood up straight again and I contemplated how I'd get past him. I stood beside him and tried to shoved his arm away, he fought back and tried to push my arms away and we ended up having a petty little cat fight, only to be caught by Harry who took one glance and went back in his room.
It was all worth it in the end because I did manage to get the door open. I honestly couldn't tell what Ben was being all secretive about.
Black walls, black hardwood flooring and black bedsheets. Hmm, looked like it matched both of our souls perfectly.
Much to my chagrin, there wasn't a shrine of me, but there were plenty of band posters and photographs. A couple guitars were hanging on walls. Two acoustics, one ukulele and one electric.
"Looks... New." I commented, noticing how the paint and flooring was perfectly intact and not chipping like mine.
"I just got it done recently." He grumbled and kicked a pair of socks to the side. He was probably unhappy about me being able to fight him.
"It's not messy at all." I pointed out and took notice of the fat ginger cat sleeping beside Ember. Ben had a cat? I didn't take him for a cat person.
There were some clothes strewn around here and there, but the room wasn't outrageously messy like mine. "Oh, and nice underwear. I didn't take you for a boxer briefs kinda guy. But hey, the more you know." I winked at him.
His jaw dropped to the floor as he looked to where my eyes were. A pair of striped boxer briefs were strewn on the floor and on top of the dresser were a pile of boxers, neatly folded and stacked.
He rushed over to pick it up while I just cooly sat on the bed and stroked Ember's fur and then the mysterious cat's fur. I giggled once she pranced about and pounced on my chest hard enough for me to fall back on the bed.
Ben had his arms crossed and he stood still by his chest of drawers. The pile of boxers were long gone and I wasn't sure if I should leave his room. Was I out staying my welcome?
Rolling my eyes, I patted the empty space on the bed behind my head since I was laying across it instead of on the pillow. He sauntered over to me and lay down, I felt a whole lot more comfortable. He was making me nervous by standing across the room and watching me.
Ember cuddled up to my side and I didn't have much to do but stare up at the ceiling, but my eyes then caught sight of a black folder on the bed and I picked it up, only to see it was filled with CD's. Lots of them too.
As soon as I had it in my hands, it was snatched away and I grunted as I sat up to take it back. He raised a brow and held the black folder away from me, as if he's testing me or something.
"My music is personal to me." Was all he said, but it wasn't believable enough. I reached out to grab hold of the folder, but he moved it away even further and I grunted. I really did wonder, was he a metal head? Did he like RnB? Dance? House? Jazz? Who knew?
"I don't give a flying shit." I huffed, "give me the goddamn folder."
"Make me." He said seductively, and even changed the tone of his voice. That little shit knew exactly what made me click.
"Oh I fucking will when I slap the shit out of you and give you a black eye too." Was I overreacting? I don't care. I knew what made him click too.
I reached out again to grab the folder and finally got hold of it because he wasn't concentrating properly. I stuck my tongue out at him and lay back down on the bed, but rested my head on the side of his abdomen since I was still lying across the bed rather than on the pillows.
He didn't seem to mind because he just stayed still instead of shoving me off or kicking me out the room, or house even.
There was seriously nothing better than laying on rock hard abs.
The first few pages of the folder had super old CD's like Boys II Men, Busted and McFly, but it started to get newer and newer and I found Ed Sheeran somewhere as well as Ariana Grande and...
"Justin Bieber?"
"That's Wendy's." He answered, but it was fun to think about him secretly liking his music. It was one of his old albums that had 'One Time' and 'Baby'.
"John Mayer? Damn, you really are a softie." I've had fantasies, a lot, and most of them consisted of Ben being this dangerous bad boy type, but now it's all gone to shit because he's a damn softie.
"Hey, if you flip further and open your eyes, you'll see Mayday Parade and A Day to Remember." He said. I had no idea what those bands were, but by the way he's saying them, it sounds as if they're rock or metal or something that would give back his pride.
"No, from what Zach's told me, you're really a softie." I chuckled. That last chat that Zach and I had consisted of just talking about other people because there was nothing more to say about the two of us.
"You do realise I could knock you out in seconds, right?" He muttered.
I grinned and used all my effort to sit up. He sat up too and put an arm behind his head to rest on it; his muscles were practically ripping the t-shirt he wore and they just reminded me of my stupid infatuation in school because those muscles tended to drive me over the edge.
It wasn't really an infatuation though, it was love. I fucking loved the guy, and I turned down a committed relationship with Marcia because I couldn't deny the feelings I had for Ben. I didn't think it was possible to love two people at once, but obviously proved wrong.
I remembered the reason I sat up and I chuckled mischievously as I pinched Ben's cheeks while teasing him about his soft side. He slapped my hands away, but I only kept on fighting against them and pinching his cheeks again.
I could feel his stubble under my fingers, but all I could think of is how much I liked it when he was clean shaved and didn't have his glasses on. The stubble didn't suit him, or at least it didn't in my opinion.
I managed to grow a beard, and I actually liked it. According to Zach, I looked like a little kid without it. It didn't help that I was skinny as fuck, and the only thing that makes me look older without my facial hair is my height, which was 6'3, just a tiny bit taller than Ben and a whole lot taller than literally everyone I know. The amount of time I've heard people ask me 'how's the view up there?' Is beyond me.
Ben tried slapping my hand away with his spare hand but I wasn't having any of it, so I started cooing at him and he chuckled as he took both hands and practically threw me to the side of the bed.
"Kinky." I snorted. He turned to me with a glare and flicked me.
Ember started barking at him and pouncing on top of Ben and I couldn't stop laughing as he tried to calm her down because it wasn't working.
"She's almost as hyper as you." He commented with a smirk.
I tried to stifle my laugh. "You're lucky I haven't thrown a shoe at you yet."
"Hey, it was risky, but I know you just held in your laugh." He pointed out and rested his head against his arm again and his muscles popped out once again.
"No, uh..." I scratched the back of my neck, pondering on voicing what was at the tip of my tongue. "I'm happy you made a joke from it."
I glanced to him, feeling a little shy to meet his eyes, but I finally did and saw him with his lips pursed, but he was smiling and it met his eyes too.
"I'm glad."
Although my illness was practically taking over my life, everything seemed a lot less stressful by just letting loose and joking around about it. I wasn't offended by what Ben said, I was actually pretty thankful that he wasn't acting as if it was this humungous issue, which is how everybody else acts towards me.
Surprisingly, he was chilled out about it. There wasn't any 'are you sure you're okay?' or 'how are you feeling today?'. It's like Ben knew exactly what to say and when to say it, and it consisted of not panicking or wondering if I'm going to be sad or happy today.
"Hey." He prodded my arm and I looked over to him, perplexed. "It's not cool when people make you feel like an outcast, I know."
"Like I did to you when we were kids?" I raised a brow.
"Nope. I've always felt like one." He muttered.
"Why?"
"I'm not up for sharing feelings and shit, especially with you." He deadpanned and reached his arm out to stroke Ember's fur. She cuddled up to him and lay across his lap. What a backstabbing bitch.
I grabbed the folder of CDs again and flipped through a few more pages before my eyes landed on a particularly special CD that had 'Ben' written on it in marker pen.
"What's this?" I asked, taking the CD out from the wallet, only to have to snatched away from my hands.
"Nothing." He said, slipping the CD under his pillow so I couldn't get to it.
I tucked my hand under his pillow but he just grabbed it and stopped me from getting to said CD. Now I was curious, and slightly annoyed because he was being all secretive again over something petty.
"It's a sample CD. God." He grumbled, giving up on trying to stop me from getting to it.
"A what what?"
"I was going to release a single like Jace and Travis did, but now I'm not. This CD has the tracks I was going to release."
"Why don't you release it?"
"I don't want to, there doesn't have to be a proper reason." He huffed.
"Can I hear it?"
"Obviously not." He smirked, and then tried ripping the CD out from my hands, but I moved them away and faced my back to him just in the nick of time.
"Please?" I pleaded.
"Flynn, I said no." He groaned, and sounded upset. I tuned around, why would he be upset for?
Ben was ass, because I saw the grin that was plastered on his face once I turned around to hand him back the CD. This time, he did get it and tucked it under a pile of shirts beside him.
My eyes then caught upon a virtually large shelf. Tons and tons of DVD's were neatly leaning against each other. An entire collection was based on Disney, and my jaw dropped to the floor. I loved Disney.
I stepped up to it, it just looked so appealing. I couldn't help the excitement that coursed through me and the grin that spread out on my face.
Never have I seen so many Disney films all in one place, and the amount of comedies, action films and science fiction made me want to jump up and down like a hyperactive child.
I picked out my personal favourite children's films and lay them out on the bed. Matilda, 101 Dalmatians, Cars and The Chronicles of Narnia.
"Can-"
"No. We can't." Ben deadpanned and interlaced his fingers together and rested them on his abdomen.
"Come on! Let's start with Matilda." I walked over to his side and shook his shoulders.
"No. And definitely not Matilda."
"What do you have against Matilda?" I cocked a brow, "you better not be a dissing my favourite film."
He pushed me away and sat up properly on the bed. "It's depressing as fuck."
"So is your face." I muttered back and put the DVDs back on the shelf. I lay across the bed again and rested my head on his stomach.
"Depressing? Not at all." How did he think it was depressing?
"At first, because her family take no notice of her and she had to learn everything herself." He explained. I could feel a stupid smile spread out on my face and I turned on my side so I could see his face.
"But in the end, she benefited from it. It's a fictional film, dude."
"I know..." He muttered. I just smirked and he narrowed his eyes at me.
I chuckled and lay back down on his abdomen again once I realised my head had slowly lifted from his stomach from all that arguing. "We are so watching Matilda one day."