Chapter 19.
I woke up by the song birds chirping away outside, and the sun slipping through the curtains that covered the window. I breathed in a sigh before closing my eyes again and turning towards the warmth that slept beside me. My hand came in contact with Lucian's bare stomach, and I couldn't help but smile at the memories of last night. Gently, I ran my hand from the bottom of his abs to his muscular chest.
I knew something was wrong the minute I touched the place where his heart was. My eyes snapped opened, and I sprung up as I looked at my mate. His eyes were closed, and he looked like he was peacefully sleeping but something was completely different about him.
Lucian's usual tan skin was deathly pale, and his chest wasn't moving. His heart wasn't pumping blood through his body, but there wasn't even one in his chest. There was a gaping hole where it originally was, cold blood dripping from it and onto the bed. I couldn't help but scream at the fact that my mate was lying dead in our bed.
"Lucian! No, this isn't happening." I repeated, waving my hands around his chest, not knowing what to do. "You can't be...I...you're not." I stumbled.
A sob wrecked my body as I clutched his hand, tears flowing down my cheeks. She did this, Ayana killed him, I knew he did. My mate was dead because of me. This is all my fault, I killed him. I'm the reason for all this chaos.
"Penelope!" I heard a scream, and I thrashed as I felt arms go around me. "Penny wake up! Wake up!"
I opened, my eyes to meet Lucian's concerned ones, his eyes widening as they locked onto mine. Shoving him away, I ran for the bathroom in just his shirt and gripping the sink tightly. My entire body was shaking, my breath coming out in loud pants. I could feel the shirt I was wearing sticking to my back making me more uncomfortable than I already was.
"Penny talk to me." I couldn't look at him. All I could do was close my eyes and wait for the flashes of his dead body to pass.
I looked at myself in the mirror, a gasp passing my lips as I looked at myself. My eyes were glowing brightly, something they had never done before. However I could easily see swirls of black traveling around the purple in my eyes. My eyes continued to grow brighter, and I had to grip my head to prevent myself from losing it.
"Pen-" My snarl cut him off as I looked at him.
"Get out!" I screamed, my canines growing and flashing dangerously at him.
Lucian stepped back, his hand rising up in a defensive manner. I couldn't recognize him as my mate, and I didn't know why. My body was completely under someone else's control. I felt like something was crushing my chest, and pounding at my brain.
"It's just your wolf going into defense mode." Lucian said calmly, taking a step forward. I growled at him, not removing my hands from the sink as I looked at him from over my shoulder. "Okay, I'm going to go get Celia, please to move from where you are."
He disappeared before I could even respond to his words. I looked back at myself in the mirror and screamed when I saw Ayana standing there. An evil grin was plastered on her face, her arms crossed over her chest. I growled at her before throwing the first thing I could grab at her, which was hairdryer. It went right through her, only making her laugh.
"Having fun losing what little sanity you have left." She vanished before my eyes, but soon appeared a little closer to me where Lucian had previously been standing.
"Please leave." I bellowed, grabbing a hairbrush and chucking it at her. "Please just go away, please!"
She vanished again, but appeared again directly in front of me. "You killed Sage, you killed Savannah, and now you're killing everyone who's ever loved you."
"Please go away." I said weakly, unable to find it in myself to yell at her.
"You're pathetic really." She mocked. "You're a burden to your family, and that's all you'll ever be."
She disappeared after that remark, leaving me in the complete silence of the room. I continued to cry, unable to support myself as I crumbled to the ground. The taunts wouldn't pass as they echoed in my mind. I couldn't breath, couldn't function as I tried to get my thoughts back.
"I don't know what's going on with her and I immediately thought you may." I heard Lucian's voice and I looked up for a split second when I saw my mom and dad standing at the doorway.
"Get away." I screamed, covering my ears in hopes that everything would just go away. But even then it seemed like the taunts just got louder and louder.
"Lucian dear, how long has she been like this?" I heard my mom speak, her voice mildly shaking.
"She woke up screaming, it may have been a dream but..." I could feel his eyes on me as I cried. "She doesn't want me touching her, it's like she doesn't recognize me as her mate."
"You know this could just be her defense mechanism kicking in." My mom spoke again. "Being isolated for so long can make someone go a little..."
She didn't finish her sentence as she scanned me over, her eyes swarming with worry. My chest constrained at the look she was giving me as I lay helpless on the floor. My dad looked down at the floor, not allowing me to see what emotions were crossing through his mind. I looked at them, clutching my chest as a feeling of vulnerability settled deep within me.
I heard another voice from behind my parents and they turned to see my brothers staring at me. Clayton was looking at me with confusion and Rylan with concern. They began asking my parents what was going on with me, and Lucian tried to explain the way I had reacted when I woke up.
He was dead, Lucian was dead and it was all my fault. Yet, here he is standing before me with that look in his eyes. A look that I never wanted to receive from him, and it nearly broke my heart into a million pieces. He was looking at me as if he couldn't recognize me, as if he didn't know what to do with me.
"Lucian?" I whispered, my body shaking with fear.
"Why would she be losing her mind now?" Rylan asked softly, but I could still hear him.
"She's grown up with so much torment and fear," I snapped my head to my mothers voice. "I think this was triggered by Sage and Savannah's death. I had a similar reaction when Logan was killed but..."
"Penny will be fine." My dad countered, cutting her off from what she was saying. "Our daughter can get through this Celia, I know she can."
"This isn't the same as me Cooper." She snapped, her eyes narrowing worriedly. "She's different, and the things she's been through will taunt her."
"What if Ayana did something?" Clayton pointed out, taking a step into the bathroom, but I only whimpered.
"Just go away." I begged, rocking back and forth on the floor. "Leave me alone. Just go away."
"She can't possibly be talking to us." Lucian said, taking a step closer and when I didn't make a sound he approached me. "It's all in your head babe, I'm right here."
The mocks returned, blaming me for the death of everyone I know. The witch that I had killed in order to protect Savannah and save Malcolm. All the people killed because of me seemed to be swarming around my head and blaming me. I cried out, covering my ears in hope of it going away. Even with that, they seemed to be screaming in my ears no matter how badly I cried and begged.
"I didn't kill them, I didn't mean it!" I sobbed, digging my fingers into my short hair. "It's not my fault!"
"Alright that's it." Lucian came barreling towards me, startling me with his sudden move.
When Lucian came to help me up, a shrilling scream escaped my lips as I sprung my hand out to stop him. It was too late to realize that I was unintentionally using magic before I hurt my one and only. He was pushed back by a purple force causing him to fall on the ground and grunt. Just by that sound of pain, I was able to snap out of whatever trance I was in.
I didn't even feel myself moving before I was kneeling beside Lucian. He groaned, rubbing the back of his head in pain. I hurt him, I hurt my mate. Everything I do hurts him, everything that I do pushes him further and further away from me. A tear escaped as I gently placed my hand on his cheek, his eyes scrunching together in pain.
"Lucian?" I mumbled, my voice quivering. "I didn't mean to. I don't know what's gong on with me and I wish I could stop it."
"It's fine." He said softly, pinching his eyes shut before sitting up.
"We have to figure out what's going on with her." Clayton said, his arms crossed and his face dead serious.
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I sat down on the most uncomfortable medical bed imaginable as the pack doctor examined me. Sheila was poking and touching everything that could possibly be wrong with me. My dad said that when a witch does something to a person, there's a mark left on the body somewhere. By now, I had my entire body examined twice, and nothing seemed wrong with me physically.
My mother was in the room, and beside her was Trixie and Lilura. Lilura begged me to bring her into the examination room, perhaps it was because she was a witch who may be able to notice the workings of a witch. However as Sheila examined me, she remained silent the entire time.
"There's doesn't seem to be anything wrong with her, I don't see any reminiscences of a witch having done something to her." Sheila concluded, tugging off her reading glasses and locking eyes with my mother. "Celia, nothing is wrong with your daughter."
"She attacked her own mate, she hardly even recognized him for a solid hour." My mom shook her head, arms cross and face hard.
"Penelope is fine." She countered, tugging off her lab coat and putting her clipboard down. "She just needs a little more sleep and should take it easy."
"No she's far from being fine you idiot." Lilura spoke up, walking over to me with a spectacle look on her face. "A witch didn't do this, but this definitely didn't start just because it wanted to."
"Then what is it?" Trixie asked, her eyes scanning me with worry for her sons mate.
"It's just her being paranoid really, a way with coping with the recent events." Lilura explained. "If you couldn't figure that out, then who's the doctor here?"
Sheila narrowed her eyes and Lilura before rolling them and heading towards the exit of the room. "This is why I hate witches." The pack doctor left me alone in a room full of the three women who love me the most. Without Sage and Savannah, these are the next in line, beside my mother of course.
I had known Lilura as such a little girl, and she taught me everything she possibly could. She spent a lot of time trying to prepare me to find my family, and she knew my brother Clayton before I did. Lilura managed to contact my brothers, and give them the hope they needed to find me. Without her, who knows where I would be, and what would have happened to me.
With little help, Lilura and Trixie guided me into the kitchen for me to eat since that was what the doctor thought I would need. She claimed that I needed a lot more food in my system, though I felt fine with the way I was eating. Still, I sat down at the island chair and allowed my family members to make me a sandwich.
"You know, maybe this will just blow over." My mom commented as she spread the mustard on the first piece of bread. "I feel like the war will be over soon and everything will get back into place.
"Yeah, you can finally marry your fiance of eighteen years." Trixie teased, slicing the apples into small bite sized pieces.
"Lets not forget I'm becoming a grandmother in about four and a half months." My mom grinned.
Speaking of the Devil, London appeared into the room with her head held high and a look of desperate need. We all gave her a look as she made a beeline for the fridge and began digging in search of food. Clayton wasn't far behind, watching her like a hawk as she tossed several ingredients out of the pantry.
"Babe, I can make you something." Clayton commented, leaning against the doorway of the kitchen. "Just tell me what you're craving and I'll get you it."
"Oh shut up Clay." London growled, standing up and wobbling over to get a cutting board.
"I'm having Sheila put you on bed rest, I hate it when you're moving around this much." My brother grumbled, following after her and taking the knife out of her hand in order to cut up whatever vegetable she wanted.
"Well you got stuck with a mate who enjoys being on her feet." She shot back, crossing her arms over her chest and flipping her hair over her shoulder.
"I need to find Lucian." I commented, finally speaking after not doing so for a long time.
"He's out on a run, you could find him if you want." Lucian's sister added, walking in with Shaw not far behind. Jackie smiled at me, her usual heavy makeup gone and replaced with a small bit of lip balm.
I nodded, grabbing the sandwich from my moms hands and taking a huge bite from it. It had been a long time since I shifted, and it would be nice to finally do it again. It's hard to recall the feeling of being free without a care in the world, and that is what a run would do for me.
The snow was piled high on the lawn when I exited the house, and I had to grip my cardigan tighter in order to feel less cold. I kicked my slippers off on the porch before making my way towards the woods. Lucian's scent was still fresh in the air, and I know he had only went out for a run a few minutes ago. If I shifted now, I would be able to catch up with him, or at least he'll notice I am and slow down.
After undressing and stowing my clothes near a tree, I shifted and began my run. Being a white wolf made me blend in the snow, and I even couldn't tell where my white puffy tail was. My tongue hung out of my mouth as I sprinted, following the scent of my mate that was nearby.
The wind felt so nice flowing through my fur, and I felt free. The strain and dull ache in my chest was gone, and I knew it was because I was closer to my mate. Lucian couldn't be far now, and by now my scent should have hit him. I could hear his heart beating faster, and I could help but let out a yelp when I saw him standing before me.
His golden fur was neatly matted to his body, the only exception being the longer fur at the top of his head. He gave a wolf-like grin before approaching me and licking the place where my cheek would have been. I snarled playfully, nipping his front paw and taking of in a sprint. He yelped in surprise at my sudden hit and run, and followed closely behind me.
By now, I was going so fast that I could hardly feel the snow on the pads on my paws. The only sound was the birds flapping away from the two of us as we barreled through the forest. A deer ran out of the way, prancing off in hopes of not falling prey to me. It didn't need to fear me, since I would never hurt such a beautiful animal.
Lucian was by my side now, and I could hear his soft chuckle through out mind-link. I felt the surface change, and I looked down to see the we were now on ice. I yipped, trying to dig my nails in order to slow down but only ended in me slipping over my own feet.
My mate let out a bark of laughter, digging his paws into the ice and slowing down gracefully. I glared at him from my position, belly first on the ice and head resting uncomfortably on the frozen lake. He shook his head, nudging my head before trotting off in hopes of me following him. I rolled my eyes before shakily getting up.
My claws scratched and shifted on the ice, unable to find a place to grip on in order to move. Lucian paused to look at me, laughing as I once again couldn't contain my own balance on the ice. I growled lowly in warning, but he only gave a howl of entertainment.
Something began cracking and I looked down at the lake to see small cracks forming on the ice. I stared at it wide eyed, not realizing that what was happening was bad. I looked at Lucian for help, but he was too occupied laughing at my own foolishness. His bark of laughter was the last thing I heard before I was completely submerged in icy cold water.
______________________________________________________*(A/N)*
Hi everyone! Happy Sunday and welcome to 2016!
SOS is coming closer and closer to an end, but don't worry, things are finally picking up. :)
Penelope just can't get a break now can she! Lemme know what you think about her now slowly seeming to lose her mind!
VOTE/ COMMENT/ SHARE/ FAN
Xox