Chapter 5
Days passed and hours went by. A lot of things happened, a lot of things has been said. The only thing that has been uncleared to me is this project.
DAMN.
I swear! I spend everyday and night trying to do this freaking project alone! I tried to make our story more realistic since the one who was suppose to help decides to leave me alone, all stranded on doing this project.
'sigh'
Typical nerd. Always busy on doing projects and homeworks.
My mom tried to help me on doing this project. She asked me where is my partner on this project...
I told her that he bailed on me......
"WHAT!" She practically screamed.
My body began trembling for a second. I hate it when she gets mad.
"Are you telling me that your partner left you alone on doing this project?!" She asked me as she fixed her glasses properly.
My mom wears glasses. All of us does. It runs in our family for generations. You see, we Evergreen has problems on eye-sights. I still remembered having my first glasses, I was about 4 years old. My eyes were rated with high grade with an average of 140.
"Mom. I. told. you. It. is. okay." I said dramatically at every word so that my mom can get my words through her thick skull.
"I know dear but this will be more hard if you keep forcing yourself into doing something that is mean't to be made by teamwork."
She ask as she sat beside me and tried conforting me.
I sighed and faced her, giving her a fake-smile.
"Mom, sometimes we need to do something independent so we don't have to depend on other people. You, yourself, told me that." I pointed at her,
She give me a warming smile.
"I know honey. I just can't stand watching you being tired and stressed all the time." She said worriedly.
I chuckled.
"Mom, I am used to this. Remember?" I asked her.
I watched her face frowned as she started collecting the memories where I was crying when someone bullied me.
When I was kid, a lot of kids that were my age would insult me. I have a lot of memories for a kid.
You know why?
The typical reason.
When I was a kid, I would act differently than any normal boys. Instead of playing with toys, I would just study at my seat minding my own business.
Then they started to notice. That's when the insults come in.
Thats why I am numb to pain. Growing up alone with no friends.
I am glad that there were no physical bullying occured.
Sometimes, she would cry with me. She would hug me to sleep. She would blame herself for being a stupid mother and for not taking care of her son.
She loves me. Deeply.
"Mom, you don't need to worry. I am big guy now. I don't want to cry anymore. I don't want to come home with scars that makes you worry. I'll promise you this, if I graduate this highschool I would work full time to support you more." I promised.
Tears began flowing out of her eyes.
"Gosh, this conversation turns to dramatic!" She chuckled a bit while wiping her tears.
I laughed a long with her.
I guess it's time to talk to Zac about this project. Besides, I need to do this for my mom.
~
I breathe in deeply as I made way inside the school.
'You can do this Matt. Just talk to the guy'
I gripped my hands together.
'Pull yourself together, you can do this!'
I walked in slowly towards the school gates.
I slowly opened the school doors. Everything was still the same.
'Good! You can do this!'
I breathe in deeply. I walked through the halls, going to my classroom.
My hands began trembling as it got more near to the door knob. I slowly turned it, opening the door.
Some students were already here, talking with one another.
My eyes began to move as I tried to find that person who I was looking for.
'Great, he's still not here!'
I sighed and walked to my seat. I sat down and let myself calm down for a while.
'Calm down. Why am I such in a rush?'
I kept asking myself these kind of questions. I am really nervous.
I should be nervous. I am going to talk to
someone who I am afraid to talk again. This is the only way to pass this project.
Damn life. I should have been more careful on becoming anti-social.
Waiting nervously on my seat, I couldn't stop thinking about talking...to...him. I guess I am still a coward on talking to him.
No.
I have to stop on being a coward. I am doing this for my mom.
'You can do this!'
My thoughts are starting to get louder inside my head.
I couldn't breathe properly will all of this going indside of my head.
Come on Matt, it's just a talk? How bad would that be?
I looked at the wall clock that was pinned across the room.
'7:30'
It's still early. He is always late when it comes to morning. He isn't a morning person....I guess...
I waited for several minutes. I would look at the clock to see how many minutes has passed until arrived.
Many students came inside the classroom after some awhile.
My heart is still beating. Come on! How long is he gonna keep me waiting? This nervous thing isn't going to help me talk to him.
'He's just a guy!'
'He's just a guy!'
'He's just a guy!'
"How does it feel? Does it hurt?"
.....
My eyes quickly opened. That voice, I know that voice! It sounds familliar.
I closed my eyes and breathe in slowly. Maybe I am just imagining things. Maybe it's too much stress.
I really hope it's not him!
"Do you really have to ask?"
My entire world froze. It's like I have been frozen and killed internally.
It took me mili-seconds to recognize that voice.
I gulped, becoming more intense than I have ever before.
I guess it's time...
I slowly stood up. My whole body responded as I stood up, still shocked. Without any second thoughts or distractions, I slowly shifted my body towards him...
I took one step. Everything seems so slow-
motion to me. It's like walking through time without noticing it in the first place.
I walked slowly. My heart kept pounding as I got near him.
Nearer..
Nearer...
Nearer...
'I can do this.'
I motivate myself.
As I got close to him where he and his other friend that were having a conversation. I cough, loud enough so that he can notice me.
His friend told him to look behind him.
He faced to me. He looked at me boredly.
This is it.
I stood still and inhale quietly.
"Can I please talk to you? Privately?"
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