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"Lon? Lonny..."
"Hm?"
"You need to breathe."
"I am breathing how else would I-"
"No..." Jackson said as he caught up to me. "You need to stop and breathe. You're heading out on a whim and you know it."
I stopped walking and turned. We'd been walking for what I assume would have been half a day. But the day hasn't changed. There was no sun to point out what time it was. Our watches barely even worked so keeping track of time was impossible here.
All of us were dressed in the casual attire the angels wore here. White. Some were void of clothing, mainly the new Pure's.
Everyone was lagging behind. Bonnie and Kimberly were chatting away but their steps faltered. Cameron was no where to be seen.
"I just want to get there."
"And we will. Very, very soon it seems. We're not far from Citadel, it's over this hill."
"We're walking through." I said as I started walking again but Jackson grabbed my arm to stop me.
"Have you lost your damn mind?" He drawled. "We can't walk through there. You will be discovered as soon as you walk through the gates. No matter what you do Lon or Alexis or whatever the hell you want to be called now, you will be a walking ball of light and everyone and anyone will know who you are. You are The Power's- are you listening to me?"
"Of course I am." I grumbled.
"Then hear me now," He cupped my cheeks and wiped his thumb under my eye. Was I crying? "We can't go through Citadel, Lon."
"But I..."
"It won't be safe for you."
"Jack..."
"What help would we be to Gabriel if you're caught?" Bonnie and Kimberly finally caught up but remained behind Jackson. "Why do you want to go through?"
"It'll be quicker and... I want to see something."
He dropped his hands and sighed. "It'll be such a risk."
"I can go in alone."
"We wouldn't let you go alone," Bonnie spoke. "We will come with you. But-"
"We'll enter after or before you." Kim finished. "Is that okay?"
I nodded after a deliberating moment and smiled half heartedly. "Go ahead, I'll just sit here for a minute. My wings are dying to come out."
"You're going to release your wings? They're black Lon."
"Just for a second, I'll be fine. Go."
As they passed, I sat on the ground away from the path and slowly released my wings. I felt like a sitting duck with my wings out. But it felt so much better.
I stood and stretched them out, revelling in the way they felt in this realm. On earth, my wings felt heavier almost a burden. In the world before, everything felt one hundred times heavier, the air harder to breathe, the atmosphere completely swollen.
But here... It was perfect. We belonged here, angels belonged here.
"My thoughts exactly."
I jumped around and grinned at the man standing only a few feet from me. "Cassiel."
The beautiful man wasn't dressed in his robes like I'd seen before; now he was only wearing a pair of light grey pants. His mark curled over his shoulder in an intricate way. His bronze hair was still pulled back and still in a bun.
"I thought you said two days?" I said as I approached him.
"I stayed an extra day at The Stronghold, Lonsa. It has been three days in the other world. You need to remember time passes slower here but faster in the other worlds."
The reality of time only worried me more. Three days in the other world? That must be a good week on earth...
I extracted my wings into my back and sighed. "I forgot about time."
"I know," His arm rested on my shoulders. "Shall we walk?"
"Are you going to lecture me again?"
"Only because I feel you need it."
"Why do I need it?"
"It seems a certain friend has been playing on your mind."
The smile slowly disappeared from my face. I leaned more into Cassiel as we walked and frowned. "I hate that you know everything."
"You never liked that." He laughed. "Now, it seems Cameron has... Confused you?"
"Do you really want to know about my long winded love life?"
"It has been many centuries since I've heard of it and I would love to be caught up."
I explained briefly what happened with Cameron last night and what he'd shown me of my first ever reincarnated life. Cassiel was shocked Cameron had remembered that life when The Elders had erased it from our minds long ago. But after explaining that after I saved his life his memory had returned he understood.
"Well," Cassiel started after I'd finished explaining. "How do you feel?"
I stared at him in disbelief and stopped walking. "Is that all you've got?!"
"My darling, I cannot force you not to fall in love with Cameron and I cannot force you to fall out of love with Gabriel."
"I don't love Cameron."
His brow rose.
"I don't!" I stressed moving from his hold. "I don't love him."
"The only thing I can say in this situation is that you've known Cameron a lot longer than Gabriel. You fell for Gabriel almost as soon as you met him and you cannot deny it. Cameron however, you've grown to love him over time. Gabriel loves you unconditionally. Cameron loves you eternally. I could go on but it is up to you. Test the waters."
My eyes widened and I shook my head briskly. "You want me to test the waters? With Cam?"
Cassiel held his hands above his head in surrender. "It is all I can suggest. Gabriel is a good friend of mine and so is Cameron. I cannot vouch for either. There is a war out there and there is a war here. There is fire in your soul and there is fire in both Cameron and Gabriel. You," His hands cupped my cheeks just as they did at his Ball. "You need to decide who that fire burns for."
And there it was. The truth and reality laid out right in front of me.
"Don't be afraid. Embrace your feelings for them both, it's the only way for you to decide who you want."
"I can't hurt them. I've hurt Gabriel enough. I've come here to free him and here I am, ready to 'test the waters'."
Cassiel sent me a heart warming smile before pecking my forehead. "You're hurting one or the other either way."
Ouch.
"It's the truth," He said obviously noticing my flinch. "The truth hurts but so do lies. I have to leave you now. Cameron is coming. I will be at the Citadel. Blaine is safe where she is, Franklin has found her."
"I'm glad."
"You will see old friends when you go into the Citadel. I hope you're prepared. I give you my love and my best, child." His lips pressed to my cheeks before he spread his wings and drifted off into the sky toward the Citadel.
As I stood there watching him completely disappear I felt a familiar presence beside me. Test the waters Cassiel said. It was an intriguing suggestion purely because testing the waters would only confuse me and everyone else more.
"Was that Cassiel?" He asked me.
"Yes. Days pass quicker than I remember here. We have to move faster." I glanced only briefly at him before starting toward the hill.
But he grabbed my arm to stop me. I stared at his hand before averting my gaze to meet his. "Alexis."
"Speak to me all you want but don't touch me Cameron." I slipped my arm from his grip and stood toe to toe with him. "What?"
"How mad could you be to go through the Citadel."
"I've heard this all already. I'm looking for something. A book."
"What book?"
"It's complicated. Let's go."
I saw his hand reach out to grab me again but he reared back. "I can help you find it. I'm sure I remember those book shelves better than you do."
Dammit. "Fine." Without as much as another look, I passed him and jogged over the hill to catch up to the rest of them. Bonnie and the rest were still walking ahead; the large fortress like building towering high in front of us. I looked back and caught Cameron looking at me sadly. All of the progress we'd had. Our friendship being back in it's original place maybe even better than before... and...
Walking toward the Citadel took what I assumed to be half an hour but I couldn't be sure. Cameron lagged behind me I could feel his presence all the way up to the big intimidating open gates. Bonnie, Kim and Jack had already walked through but something off happened as they did. It was as if they had passed through a wall. Each of them had paused for merely a second, an untrained eye wouldn't have seen it.
Bonnie's frantic gaze turned to me and I sighed.
"You'll get through."
I turned to Cameron. "How do you know?"
"You are The Powers remember? You may have sinned, you may have caused havoc through the centuries, but no matter what happens God needs you on this side so you don't skip off to the Morning Star. You'll get through."
"Unnoticed?"
His mouth twitched.
"Didn't think so."
For a few moment's I watched as people passed through the gates without blinking. I watched Cameron pass through the gates with only a few glances to his direction. Bonnie and Kimberly had scurried off to God literally only knows where. Jackson was hanging around and talking to who I can only assume are the guards with their large marks on the chests all similar to the next.
"Here goes." I grumbled to myself as I started toward the gate.
Before crossing the line of the gates I looked around the long wide walkway. It was a stone path leading all the way into the Citadel. The buildings were ancient but well kept, Angels wandering in and wandering out. None of them had a care in the world here. No worries, nothing. As soon as I passed through the threshold of the gates, my wrist and hand started burning. I grunted aloud and glared down at the mark on my hand. What was once black... now burnt bright red.
A gasp came from the guard standing beside Jackson but before he could say or do anything, Jackson pushed him discreetly into a unlit corner and... well, shut him up. And by shut him up I mean knocked him unconscious.
Cameron was on me in a second with one of the blankets from our previously discarded backpacks wrapping it around half of my body, covering my arm. Obviously he hadn't gotten rid of his, how I hadn't noticed it on his back was beyond me. "We haven't long."
"Why?" I gasped out blocking out the burning tingles traveling up and down my arm.
"Because, Princess." He emphasized. "It seems ever since Gabriel's been put into that cell in Bastille, they've set a target to activate your mark as soon as you pass those gates."
My eyes widened. "For two and a half year's they've had that set up?!"
"They were confident you'd come." He joked but I slapped his arm. "Cover your arm and breathe. Concentrate all of your energy on your hand. Weaken your energy and yourself or they'll be able to find you."
As he ripped the blanket in half and grabbed the pins from my hair, letting it fall to my shoulders, I focussed my full attention on my energy and burning palm. I clenched my teeth and thought solely on caging my energy and calming myself. I inhaled deeply and slowly fully aware of the way Cameron arranged the halved blanket to hang over my arm and shoulder like a cape. He used the two clips to press onto my white top. All at once I felt my body slump and my powers waning. I hadn't ever weakened myself to this extent before.
"Good, well done. I can barely sense you and people are looking away. You'll be okay for a while. Quick." He took the hand that wasn't covered by the blanket and supported my weight as we got back onto the main path. He didn't speak a word as he led me down the long stone path. The buildings growing bigger as we walked down. I spotted Bonnie a fair distance away watching us with worry, her gaze glancing at the guards, talking to one and other.
Cameron tugged me into a large circle of buildings; another path leading along to the fortress I used to call home.
"Look at it," I mumbled. "It never changes."
It resembled a beautiful castle, and if I had to compare the place to any other building, even the walk to it, I'd compare it to the Vatican in Italy. The large archways circled around it, the huge dome like building sitting atop the building. Each pillar was manned by a guard. Each unmoving. I saw absolutely no reason for them. There was never an attack, it was pointless. The Angelic World was the most relaxed place in the universe. The only section that wasn't relaxed was entry. "The Gates of Heaven," in other words. There were too many levels to this world, it was hard to keep up.
"Here. The Ancient Archives." I allowed him to drag me through the open doors of what I could only assume was the library. The writing on the walls were ancient Enochian. I may have written part of the book but this was old even for me. "Ten minutes, Alex. And I mean ten minutes."
"Don't tell me what to do," I whispered under my breath before slowly walking around. The library was at least... "Awh no."
"Yeah. Ten floors. Good luck finding it in ten minutes, hun. A floor a minute if you can."
I sent him a challenging look. "Time is endless here, sweetie. I'll find it in ten minutes."
**
"Having fun?"
I flinched and sighed. "If I could swear at you right now..."
He laughed quietly and sat down at the desk I was currently sat at surrounded by books. I was residing on the eighth floor but I'd only covered about four of them."You know if you'd tell me what you're looking for...?"
I brought my hand up to my sweating brow and wiped my palm against it. "It's nothing."
"Alex."
"Why are you calling me Alex and Alexis again anyway. Ever since we came here that's all you've called me." I complained as I closed the current book I was looking at.
"I'll tell you if you tell me."
I watched the smile spread across his face before glancing down at the only book that had helped me so far. I flicked through the pages and found the chapter I'd been studying for what felt like forever but was only apparently 5 minutes. "I'm looking for my past, Cameron." I began. I turned the book to face him. The Enochian words jumped out at me over and over again but... even as I read it, it still didn't hit me like it should. "These words about me. About what I was like in this world with Perses and Helena. These images..." There were black and white drawn images of what I could assume were me and the elders. "I have scars that have popped up on my body I can't explain because... I don't remember."
"I thought you remembered everything."
"No," I shook my head. "It comes to me when it needs to or it doesn't at all. I don't remember Perses and Helena. I don't remember much of this place apart from the memories I've seen. I wish these words meant something to me."
He stared at the words on the page for what seemed like forever before standing up and disappearing. I scratched my wrist, grunting quietly as my power threatened to surface. I watched as Cameron climbed the stairs to tenth floor circling the aisle twice before picking out a small book. He returned with a ghost of a smile playing on his lips before sitting down opposite and opening it. "Scan through it and you'll see your past."
I flicked the cover open and read eight words, "The Wind Blows, Fire Burns and Water Runs."
"This whole book is about me, you and Gabriel. Take it with you. We have to leave you're-" Cameron's pupils enlarged and his whole frame froze.
"Cameron?" I gasped as his torso collapsed onto the table completely vegetated. "Oh, my god. Cam?"
"Oh no." A deep voice grumbled.
I stood quickly, standing next to Cameron in a protective position and spun around. "Who's there?"
"Alex, you need to leave."
My eyes widened and I moved the blanket from my arm to show my burning red mark. "Who is that?"
A figure emerged from behind one of the book cases and my eyes widened. "Mother of God."
"Of all the places to say that," He said with a small smile his bright blue eyes shining with awareness."I can't believe you're here."
I grabbed the neck of Cameron's shirt and yanked his heavy body upward, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. "And I can't believe I'm even considering talking to you."
"Ah, come on-"
"Tristan, I don't have time for this."
"It's been a long time-"
"Why is he like this?" I interrupted looking at Cameron only briefly before examining Tristan. He looked exactly the same. His hair still a dark shade of blond, his blue eyes bright. He didn't look as large as he used to oddly enough.
"The Archguards know you're here. And they know he is as well. I only had to see for myself. I can get you out of here, Alexis."
"I don't trust you."
Sadness filled his eyes and I sighed. A lot of trust came out of me when Joseph, Tristan and Elizabeth left. I wouldn't immediately trust them again.
"Do you have a choice right now?" He gave a pointed look to Cameron's dead weight on my shoulders. "Go down and right. I'll go first so follow me but go to the right okay?"
"I don't think-"
"Alexis, it's me okay? We have plenty of time to catch up so you can yell at me. Get out of this without being seen and we can spend an evening talking."
I waddled past him with Cam in tow and scowled. "I don't have time to spend evening's talking. I need to get to Bastille."
Tristan passed me but glanced back as he walked. "Why?"
"For Gabriel."
"What are you going to do, break him out? It's a fortress."
"I'll figure it out. I have Bonnie with me."
His eyes sparkled. "Bonnie's here? I miss that girl."
My emotions heightened all of a sudden and I found my steps faltering. "And she misses you."
Tristan stopped and turned to me by the time we reached the ground floor. "I've missed you, Alex." He pressed a brotherly kiss to my cheek.
I will not cry.
"Come on. To the right remember. Just keep going straight and I'll meet you. Don't stop."
As soon as we walked through the doors I turned right leaving Tristan to go to the left. But both of us paused.
Awh, crap.
I spun around, my grip tightening on Cameron's arm and watched as Tristan dropped to the ground just as Cam had a moment ago. The path's were silent and all of the guards were surrounding us.
Jackson and Kim were being restrained and Bonnie was no where to be seen.
The cage I was holding all of my energy in released and the burning in my hand caused me to shout in pain. Cameron dropped from my hold and I fell to my hands and knees aware of guards slowly closing in on us.
A pair of feet filled my vision as my head dropped to the ground. I looked up and growled out Leo's name before falling completely unconscious.
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