Chapter 7
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*Raelin's POV*
As I enter the pizza shop, Haidley and Carrie are already there. They're standing in the corner of the shop, looking somewhat worried, I guess you would say. They spot me, then come over to me pulling each of my arms and pulling out of the shop.
"What are you doing?" I ask and they turn me around so I'm leaning against the wall staring helplessly at both of them. They look like skyscrapers and the light shining behind them doesn't really help.
"You don't want to go in there," Haidley warns then turns and heads down the sidewalk towards another store.
"We're going to Starbucks instead!" Carrie exclaims in her perky tone of voice. She then begins following Haidley. I could probably turn around and walk back to my apartment and they wouldn't notice until they got there, but I need to get to the bottom of this fishy behavior.
So, I follow.
We make our way to the Starbucks a few blocks down. We enter and find seats towards the back away from the window in the front. Haidley hates it when people watch her eat or drink. I guess it's creepy, but it doesn't really matter. Of course, Haidley always have an argument.
"What was going on in that pizza shop?" I ask automatically. I've spent so many years asking for gossip that it's pretty much a habit now. Sometimes, though, I wish it wasn't a habit of mine. I wish I could just be another face in the crowd and not have so much pressure on me to make good decisions for my popularity's sake. Then, I realize how stupid that would be. I am the girl everyone wanted to be and every guy wanted to date.
I don't think any girl wants to be in my position.
But, they don't know. I intend to keep it that way.
"It's something with Taliyah," Carrie says and Haidley elbows her in the side.
"Carrie!" she scolds and by this time, I know something is up.
"What?" she asks like she's completely innocent. Which, we all know she's not in every single way possible to be "innocent."
"Rae, I'm sorry, but we have to tell you," Haidley begins. "Don't get mad at me or Carrie. Get mad at Taliyah or Tyler, but not at us."
"Tyler?" I ask and laugh. But, then I see their serious expressions, and a thought that I don't want crosses my mind. "You're not...no." Is all I manage to say.
"Tyler is cheating on you with Taliyah," Carrie says what everyone is thinking. I admit, I admire her straightforwardness. But, she does it out of complete ignorance, which is what annoys me. How could someone be so... so... I want to be nice, but I can't do it. How can someone be so stupid?
"We can help you get through this..." Haidley trails off obviously wanting to say something else. "After you dump him and break his little heart!" And there it was.
"Look, guys, I don't care what Tyler does. I only got back together with him to get Raph off my back," I say, but then realize what I said. "April! I meant April off my back." I try to smile to hide the fact I said a name they don't have a face with. Now, they're curious.
"Who's Raph?" Haidley asks somewhat cautiously.
"Raph? I don't know a Raph..." I try to cover it up, but it's too late. They know about Raph. Well, kind of. They don't know what he looks like. They should never know. I just need to get out of this hole I dug for myself.
"Is he hot?" Carrie asks and I look at her confused.
"What?" I ask but then start shaking my head as I stand up. "No! No, no, no, no, no, no!! There is no Raph, ok? I was just kidding. Making sure you were listening!" I begin heading towards the door when I feel a hand hold me back. I turn around to see Haidley's brown eyes staring intently at me.
"Don't freak out on us like that, Rae!" Haidley shouts almost in my face. A few people turn to stare at us.
"Get away from me! You don't know me, Haidley, you just don't! You don't understand me and you never will! You're not a real friend, ok? You act like you like me, but you don't! You just use me to boost your own popularity! Admit it!" I shout and she lets go of my arm looking completely stunned. Everyone is looking now, but I don't care.
"Rae..." she simply says under her breath. I can tell she's stumped. She doesn't know what to say, because it's true.
"No, Haidley. Go away," I feel tears sting at my eyes as I say this. I turn around and exit the door. I dial Tyler's number and he answers almost instantly.
"Where do you want to eat?" he asks as soon as he picks up.
"I'm eating at my apartment. You can eat in the dumpster with Taliyah for all I care!" I shout then hang up, hoping he got the message that I wasn't his girlfriend anymore. Just, no. I can't do this anymore. I can't be "popular" anymore. I can't walk around knowing the only person who truly loves me is my mom. I just can't. Raph, April, or even Taliyah aren't the monsters here. I am. I've done all of this to myself.
Tyler probably thought I was crying because he was cheating on me. How pathetic. I don't give one flipping pancake about his new love life. I don't know what to do. April hasn't tried contacting me anymore, so she's got the message.
Tyler will know sooner or later that I'm done with him, too.
Haidley and Carrie are done with me. They wouldn't waste their time on me anymore. I can only imagine how I left Haidley looking at me. I wonder what she's thinking. I wonder what kind of rumors her and Carrie are going to start about me to get revenge.
I've caught both of them in their lies. That's when my phone buzzes signaling a text message.
look, rae, i dont understand u we obviously like u! if we didnt y would we stay ur friends when taliyah told us not to?
It was from Haidley. I guess she had a point, but who knows? They've lied to me before.
look, haidley, i need some time alone, kay?
I hit send and she doesn't respond, which means she's pissed off.
Everyone in my life is turning on me. I know I probably deserve it, but still. That doesn't make the pain any less. Actually, it might make the pain even worse.
I finally reach my apartment and head into my room. I throw my phone across the room in frustration, knowing I'll never forget the way my phone leaves my hands. I have control over whether I want to break it or not. Yet, I choose to break it. Seems very familiar.
The sound the impact of the phone shattering against the wall is something I'll never forget either. The way it was flying, being free one moment, and then the next, boom, broken and shattered on the ground. Sounds familiar... again.
**the next day**
My alarm clock wakes me up at 7:00am like always. Except, I can't go to school. Not under these conditions.
I wobble into my mom's room and slip into be with her.
"Raelin, you're too big for that," she points out and I realize that she's been awake this whole time. I wonder why. She's always asleep at this hour.
"I know, mom," I acknowledge her, but stay in the bed. Even if my mom doesn't know about any of this, it still feels safe here with her. Even if she can't help me, I still love knowing that she'll never lose faith in me. She won't give up on me when everyone else will. Especially me.
"You need to get to school," she states and I wince just at the thought of going.
"I don't feel good enough to go, mom," I make up something, anything to not go back there.
"Do you think you're sick?"
"Maybe."
She stares at me for a few moments, he chest slowly rising and dropping as she breathes. I can feel her heart beat, and mine, through the silence. It's not the awkward silence, or the one when you're begging for someone to speak. It's the kind where you could stay silent forever, and it was comforting. I don't need words right now. I just need love. That's something I could never get from Haidley or Carrie.
"You can stay home," she finally decided and stayed home with me.
This happened for the rest of the week.
*Raph's POV*
**Sunday**
As I head downstairs to work on some of my combat skills with Master Splinter, April comes rushing past me. As she passes me, she stops looking me in the eye. I can tell she knows I've been crying, which of course I don't want anyone finding out. So, I move along down the stairs so she can't confront me about it.
Pretend like it never happened, Raph I think to myself. But, I know that's impossible because it's the past. It's already done. I can't change it. But, that doesn't mean other people need to know about it.
"Raph!" I hear April's voice behind me. I can't ignore her, because I know how upset she was when Raelin ignored her. I don't want to hurt her even more. Hey, I'm tough and stubborn, not mean. Well, I guess that last part depends on the circumstances.
"Yes?" I ask wincing a little bit. I don't want her to confront me about my eyes being a little bit bloodshot from crying earlier.
"I think you should go check on Raelin. She hasn't been in school all week," she explains and I nod, but don't want to go. I couldn't. Raelin doesn't want me, I've heard.
"April, it's too late," I simply breathe out those words.
April grips my shoulders and looks into my green eyes with her blue eyes very sternly. "Listen, Raph, you need to go check on her. It could be your only chance. Her and Tyler broke up because he cheated on her. Go comfort her. Show her you truly care for her and will do anything for her," she explains and I nod.
"Fine," I finally agree and get out of her grip. Then, I head for Raelin's apartment.