A/N::: I really hope you like this chapter! It took a long time to write!
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Katie
The results from today's performances won't be announced until tomorrow morning, so now everyone has time to theselves. After dinner is finished, I decide to go back to the hotel room so I can skype Jen and Nate. I'm also pretty tired. It's been a long day, and there's an hour time difference, so my sleeping schedule is thrown a little off kilter. Arriana and Chase decide to stay back and have bonding time with the other contestants. I'll go tomorrow If I make it through, but tonight I'm pooped and wouldn't be much of a fun person to be around.
When I arrive back at the room, I walk inside and flop on the bed again. I get my phone and text Jen:
Skype?
She doesn't reply, but instead I hear my laptop dinging with the sound of a Skype call, and soon I'm connected with my best friend who's halfway across the country.
"Jen!" I start. "I haven't seen you since this morning!"
She begins to fake cry, "I know. I miss you so much. I haven't seen you in sooo long." We both fake cry like the idiots we are for a few minutes.
But then I mention the "crisis," " So what's with this "crisis" you wanted to tell me about? Is it bad?"
Jen's face drops for a moment. Apparently something is very, very, very wrong.
"What is it?" I ask, getting a bit more worried. "Is someone hurt? Are you pregnant? Don't tell me I need to go cut off Bobby's man-junk... I'll do it, but it won't be pleas-"\
"No, I'm not pregnant, Cass. Lord... Don't even make me picture that... Can you imagine?" The look on her face is of utter horror. "But are you sitting down?"
"You can see me, Jen. I'm sitting down." That idiot. We're on Skype!
"Sorry.. I'm just used to asking that when I'm breaking news to someone."
I'm at the point of wanting to pull my hair out now. Can she just tell me and get it over with? "Just tell me, Jen. It's like taking off a Band-Aid. You just have to do it. Now what is it?"
"Ummm..." She bites her lip, trying to figure out a way to tell me whatever it is. Then she takes a deep breath and starts to speak a million miles a minute:
"So this afternoon a bunch of people went to the pool, right? And I went, and Bobby went, and Nate went, and well.... Melanie went.... and-"
I butt in, "Melanie!? What was she doing there? Don't tell me it's going where I think it's going..."
"I'm sorry, Cass. I really am. I tried to talk some sense into him, but there was a broom closet and he's a boy and she was wearing a bikini and well... you probably know what happens." I can tell that it pains her to say this. Melanie was, for lack of a less derogatory term, a slut. She made it well known too. She's been with countless guys, including both Bobby and Nate. I think she went out with Bobby for a week or two during freshman year, and then she and Nate fooled around at the end of sophomore year. I guess he never really did get over her.
Tears spring up to my eyes, and I try to hide them, but Jen notices. "I'm so sorry, Cass. I am truly sorry." I sniffle, and I honestly am shocked. "I thought he loved me. God... and with Melanie? Of all people! Do you remember when she filled my locker with jello boxes in eighth grade? And then she absolutely ruined my art project in tenth grade. She's terrible..."
"Will it make you feel better if I tell you that I made Bobby beat him up? It was entertaining."
I chuckle a bit through my tears. "Really?"
She nods. "I'm so sorry I had to tell you over Skype, but you would have ended up Skyping him right after this, and he wouldn't have said anything. He would have just pretended it didn't happen and you would have been in the dark and that wouldn't have turned out well. This is actually going better than I thought it would. I was pretty sure you would be absolutely sobbing. The thing is though, I don't want you throwing away this opportunity. You should use this as a chance to show him what he's missing."
I try to smile a bit, "I will, Jen. I'll sing some nasty revenge song for my next performance or something."
"There's my girl!" Jen smiles. "Now, however, I need to go to bed because tomorrow morning I have to be at my babysitting job at 7... joy... So are you sure you're gonna be okay?"
I nod. "I'll survive. I think I'm fine, but I need to get to sleep too. I need my energy for tomorrow. Who knows what'll happen."
"You will do great. I have faith in you, freak. Now. Good Night" Jen waves goodbye and blows a kiss to me before switching off the Skype Cam.
I fall back into the blankets and pillows on my bed and scream into my pillow, letting out all the anger that's been bottling up inside of me for the past few minutes. Why now? That idiot-head. He told me he loved me. Obviously that's not true if he went and did... things in a broom closet with the she devil.
Part of me has a feeling this is because I'm saving myself for my wedding night. He's wanted to do things like that with me before, but I told him how I felt about it, and he said it was okay. He said he would wait for me. Apparently he lied.
I pick up my phone that I put on my bedside table and I begin typing out a text to the man of the hour himself:
I heard about what happened today, and you can bet you won't be Skyping me tonight. We will talk when I get back home.
I leave it at that because I really can't stand to think about it right now. I just shower and get ready for bed. At 10:00, my light is turned off and I'm snuggled into the covers.
I hear the door creak open, which means that Arriana's back. I pretend to be asleep because I don't really want to talk. I just want to sleep. Soon I get my wish, and I'm welcomed into dreamland's loving arms.
---------------
My alarm goes off at eight the next morning, and I wake up feeling extremely rested. I stretch and look out the window to see some beautifully clear skies with just a few puffball clouds floating by. The sun is shining, and I hope today grants me good luck, because I'm going to need it.
I wore some sweatpants and an old school spirit shirt to bed last night, so I put on my glasses, slip on my shoes, and head downstairs to get some of the hotel's breakfast. Hopefully they have pancakes, because I'm starved. Sleeping does that to a person.
I arrive at the elevator, and I tell the button pusher man, "Lobby please."
We descend to the bottom floor where I am met with the wonderful aroma of bagels and biscuits and syrup and sugar and coffee and all wonderful things that are breakfast. My tummy rumbles, and with that, I walk over to the breakfast area where I begin loading my plate with some fruit and some yummy looking pancakes. I grab a glass of orange juice too, and then I look at the group of about ten tables and try to find somewhere to sit. Luckily, I notice Chase sitting at a table near a window, so I drag my tired feet over there with my plate in hand.
When Chase sees me, he gives me a tired smile and says, "Good morning." He takes in my appearance and points out, "Oh, you have glasses!"
"Morning, and yes I am 'little miss four eyes'" I reply with a yawn as I sit down opposite him. "Sleep well?"
He shakes his head. "No. I couldn't. Too worried about today. I think I've been down here since about 5:30... I've been reading for about half of it."
"You'll do fine, Chase. You sang fantastically yesterday."
"Sometimes that's not enough though. This is my third time through this, and If I don't make it though this time, I'm pretty sure I'm done. I've put off college for two years now so I could do this competition, and if it's not working out, I really need to get back to school."
"I can't see them sending you home, Chase. You're too good," I try to reassure him.
"That's what I thought last year and the year before. Look what happened then."
I sigh and look down at my food. I should probably start eating it before it gets cold, but I've suddenly lost my appetite. Now I'm really worried about myself and this competition, and then Nate slips back into my mind. With what happened yesterday, I need to show him how much I'm worth, and what he lost when he cheated on me. I need to make this competition work, but I can't do that on an empty stomach.
"Maybe this year things will change," I say quietly while I begin picking at one of the pancakes.
"Maybe. Hopefully." Chase gives me a bit of a smile signaling that he has at least an iota of hope, which is better than nothing at all.
-------
About twenty minutes later, both Chase and I head back to our rooms to get ready. When I open the door, I notice Arriana is still sleeping soundly. We need to be at the bus stop at 9:30, and Arriana probably wants sufficient time to get ready. I decide to wake her up so I walk over to the side of her bed and begin gently shaking her shoulder. I try and try again, but she doesn't even stir. Then I decide to use another weapon in my arsenal. I whisper loudly, "Arriana! Wake up! Chase is here!"
With barely a millisecond of hesitation, she sits up abruptly in her bed and begins freaking out a bit, "Why? What time is it?" She opens her eyes, but is soon blinded by the light coming into the windows. She scrunches her eyes closed and hides her face in the bed's pillows.
"Chase isn't really here, is he?" She asks.
"Nope. But you probably want ample time to get ready, so I thought it would be best to wake you up now."
She sighs into her pillow, so her voice is muffled when she says, "Thanks... I guess..."
"Welcome," I comment with a chipper tone. I walk to my suitcase and begin looking for something to wear today while Arriana manages to roll out of bed and get into the shower. She doesn't seem like much of a morning person.
-----
So after we've gotten dressed, slid down the railings of the stairwell, and traveled on the bus, we soon find ourselves in the arena again where we are awaiting the news of our fate in this competition.
We sit the same way we sat yesterday, with Arriana seated between Chase and me. She keeps trying to have a conversation with him, but his eyebrows are knit in concentration, and he seems out of his element. Anyone with eyes can tell he's nervous, and he sounds constricted whenever he replies to Arriana's questions and comments. She's excited for today. I can imagine that she's at least a bit nervous as well though because she keeps on twiddling her thumbs and biting her lip as she's talking. I keep on texting meaningless texts to Jen, and after awhile, she just stops replying right away because the messages lack conversational substance.
Soon enough, the producer from yesterday walks out on stage again, and luckily, this time he doesn't cause everyone to go deaf from the screeching sound system. He simply brings the microphone to his mouth and begins talking.
"So today we will face the first eliminations of bootcamp." I notice Chase gripping the armrests on his seat. "We ask that everyone relocate themselves to the dining room where you ate yesterday evening, and then we will call you all in here in groups so we can let you know what's become of you. I want to let you know, that the judges had a very difficult time weaning the competition down to 75 people last night. But it had to be done, and it was done. Good luck to all of you." He removes the microphone from his face, and then he gives a small wave as he walks off the stage.
Collectively, everyone makes their way to the dining room. Everyone finds a seat, and barely anyone is milling around talking. The feeling in the room is that of a hospital waiting room, where people wait to learn the fate of their loved one. We're all waiting to hear the fate of our possible careers.
Soon enough, a woman with a clipboard walks in and begins calling out names of people who should come to the stage. It doesn't appear that they're in any particular category right now. They call a few groups, several of the teenagers, some of the older group, and some of the young adults as well. Neither Chase, Arriana, or me is called, so we just sit and wait as patiently as we can. The nerves are getting to me, and my palms are sweating and it's not a very enjoyable feeling.
"I need y'all's numbers," Arriana breaks the silence as she pulls out her cellphone for our numbers. We all exchange numbers, and then Arriana says, "You're not losing me that easily."
I'm about to say something, when yet another person with a clipboard comes in and begins reading off names. This time, both Arriana and Chase are called, but I'm not. I give them both a quick hug before they exit the room, arm in arm.
This is very frightening now. They're calling us all in several different groups so we don't really know who's staying and who's leaving. My fate is still up in the air, and I have no idea which way the coin could land. The room is half empty now, and I imagine that they're probably going to call us onto the stage in two more groups. I hope I'm next, because I just can't wait much longer.
Unfortunately, when the next group is called, I'm not in it, and the numbers in this room of worry are dwindling. I can hear someone muttering prayers in a corner, but besides that, the room is silent aside from a few stolen whispers.
Then we're called.
Somehow, I make my feet move. One step, two steps, three steps....
Somehow I find myself on a big stage yet again.
Somehow I find myself joining hands with my fellow contestants.
Somehow I find myself uttering the Lord's Prayer under my breath as I await my fate.
Somehow I hear the judges begin speaking in a way that causes my stomach to drop to the floor.
Then it's like a roller coaster. A roller coaster is terrifying, but thrilling. You know you won't be hurt, but you still have that fear of falling. You still love it despite the fear.
And now I'm strapping myself into that roller coaster because the ride of my life will start soon.
I'm through.
"