Author's Note: Well, I'll be damned. 23 whole comments on the last chapter! Plus, some absolutely INCREDIBLE detective work from CrazyCranberry on the last chapter. Ten points, A+, and a bag of homemade cookies for you! Cheers, love! Well, now I have high expectations for comments from now on, so ya best being living up to them! OR ELSE. Just kidding. Well, I love you all, I am basically comotose from PROM LAST NIGHT (woo!) and so I apologize for my editing. And this rambling. Side note, me and Shannon took a picture pretending to be Loki and Thor. I was Loki and she was Thor and I think we played our rolls quite swimmingly, complete with mischief and reprimanding. Okay. I promise. Story time now, I swear. Soon we will know who landed on the roof! OR WILL WE? We will. :P
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Tony and Banner dash out of the door and I follow behind them until Loki calling my name stops me in my tracks. When I turn around, he is still hobbling towards me. No more rapid appearances, no more appearing and disappearing...if I hadn't allowed him to bludgeon me to get his cuffs off then we wouldn't be in this position. There it is. Always too trusting of him.
"I need you to trust me," Loki whispers. Oh, come on.
"Loki, we need to go!" I try and drag him along with me, but in a moment he has my back pressed to the wall.
"You must understand. I have lived a great many years fearing to need anything, fearing to be of want or imposition—”
"Is this really important right now?" I ask, rolling my eyes. I push him off of me but then he lays me back against the wall again taking his hand to my cheek and running it over my skin, down my neck and down my arm, gentle as anything. I can feel his hand tremble against my skin.
"It is of the utmost importance, my dear. It is something you must hear from my lips. I have forbidden myself much of the joys of life because I felt I was unworthy of them. In my whole existence I have felt a terrible...cavity in my being. When you offered to help me and befriended me I did not know quite how to accept it. I did not want you around me for a fear of needing you. Want for nothing, I have always advised myself.
I abused you and your trust most foully. I have harmed you and I wish I could take it back again. That night...you presented me with a gift and it made me angry. I filled with anguish because I felt I was using you. You sacrificed everything for my worthless soul..."
"Loki..." I attempt but he shakes his head and touches my hair, tucking it behind my ear. I feel the tears in my eyes. I shake my head. "We need to go."
I pull away from Loki and hurry to where the elevators are, dragging Loki behind me. We are silent in the elevators until we get to the top floor.
"Please," Loki says quietly, "understand why I brought you here. I lost my ability to see reason and I could not come to terms with myself about how I felt about you. In my blind anguish and reversion back to who I thought I best am, a monster, a villain, I saw one clear logic. To take you with me. I brought you here because I believed you would listen to me, understand how I felt. I suppose I brought you here to confess something that I have been repressing for a long time now.”
I stare at him for a moment, trying to take in everything he is saying. It slowly begins to make sense in my head, the fitting together of puzzle pieces I once believed to be the wrong shape. But the picture is much clearer now, with every word. The doors slide open and Tony, Banner and Thor are just outside of them. Thor looks weary, but not so weary as Loki remains to be.
“Brother!” Thor exclaims, face brightening. He pulls me into a hug the moment I step foot outside of the elevator. “Lady Valkyrie, how are you faring?”
“I am well, it is Loki you should be concerned with,” I prompt, pushing Loki forward. The two brothers consult quickly and I stand off, watching with Tony and Banner.
Tony leans over, prodding me with his elbow, “So, you’re a lady on Asgard, eh?” I look at him and roll my eyes poignantly, but he is too busy enjoying the very thought of it.
“Technically. Let me remind you that I am both Asgardian and Jotun, and merely born on Earth. I can, and still will, crush you,” I mutter lowly at him, deadpan. Of course, I don’t actually mean it. But if it gets him to shut his stupid mouth, well, then, I have no qualms with a threat. And to my luck, he does shut up. I turn my focus back to Loki and Thor, and Loki looks horrified.
“No,” he says firmly, arms crossed over his chest. They’ve reverted to English, which is good news for the rest of us.
“My apologies, Loki, but it is not my decision. I cannot undo what has been done,” Thor says and I swear he looks at me quickly from the corner of his eyes.
“What do you expect her to do?” Loki growls.
Yup. This is definitely about me.
“She will stay here with the Man of Iron and the other Avengers until the Allfather can get enough power to bring her back as well,” Thor says, looking sad. I can feel everyone staring at me, but I can’t see it. I’ve developed some sort of short term tunnel vision.
The word is a whisper, “What?”
Someone touches my shoulder. Thor. “The Allfather drained most of his magic in getting myself here to fetch Loki. He finds it imperative that we bring Loki back first so that he may heal and face punishment, and I shall return for you in due time.”
“You’re going to leave me here with a bunch of strangers so you can torture Loki for having a temper tantrum? I don’t think I like that very much, Thor,” I bite, regaining my ability to actually focus on the people around me. If you can call them people. Two gods, a Gamma-rayed Hulk man and a billionaire with an arc reactor built into his chest to keep him alive. People.
“I…I have no say in the matter. Now that I am here, Odin shall only take back Loki and I. It should happen any moment, but I do not know quite when. We can only wait and Odin will draw us back to Asgard.”
“Fuck this,” I say suddenly, pushing my way past Thor.
“Valkyrie,” Loki says quietly.
I shake my head, “No, no, you know what? Fuck this. Fuck everything. And fuck you too, Odin!” I raise my middle finger to the sky with a sarcastic bow. “No offense, guys, but your dad is a dick. Everything I does, he tries to find some ulterior motive. He doesn’t trust me. And now, after I’ve basically given up ever having a normal life to come to your damn planet to help protect him, he won’t even bother to use a little extra magic to bring me back too. Fine, fine. Just keep throwing Valkyrie around to random places, she won’t mind! What’s a few extra days pent up with some superheroes? Fucking shit.”
Nobody has a response, and I am certain I would be speechless if it hadn’t been my own damn rant. Thor seems the most surprised, Banner looks embarrassed and a little sympathetic and Tony and Loki just look impressed.
“Loki…we are being summoned. We must depart,” Thor says quietly. I sigh and cover my face with my hands before dropping them back down in defeat.
“Well, bye, I guess,” I shrug. Thor heads towards the outside balcony just beyond where we are standing. Out of the glass wall I can see the helicopter pad, and the entirety of upper Manhattan. It would be nice if I weren’t so miserable. I can only watch them go. Loki follows Thor, limping along, and the three humans trail after them. We watch from the side as the skies grow slightly dark around us and I feel a rain drop on my face. Only then do I realize it isn’t the rain that I feel dripping down my cheek. I wish I could give them a proper goodbye, not knowing when I will see them again.
“Valkyrie!” I look up and Loki is standing on the edge of the helicopter pad, his hand outstretched towards me. I rush to him, uncertain of what he wants from me. He slips something cool into my palm and closes my hand around it before reaching up to brush my tears away. He smiles sadly. “Don’t cry over me, love.”
“I feel like an idiot,” I admit with a pained laugh, wiping the tears away too. My hand brushes his and then wraps around his fingers. “Be good, Loki.”
“I shall try, if only for you.”
I nod, uncertain of what else I can say. “What, uh, what was it that you wanted to confess to me? The thing you mentioned earlier?”
“Surely you have an inkling about my feelings towards you,” Loki says, searching my eyes. I can’t bring myself to look away from the clear green pools. They’ve grown so familiar and still manage to plague my thoughts and be infuriatingly unreadable.
I open my mouth to come up with some meager response, but he places a finger over my lips. He leans forward, his nose brushing against mine and I close my eyes, bringing my lips to close the distance from his. But suddenly the weight of his hand upon my cheek is lifted and I cannot feel his forehead pressed to mine. I am left hanging, my lips unmet, and I open my eyes. Loki is gone.