A/N: I know I said I wouldn't update for a while, but I was inspired and didn't want to wait. Hope you enjoy!
Edited:
Published: Thursday August 27 12:08p.m 2015
Ayah:
July 27th
"So, where is he taking you?"
For the hundredth time, I sighed and shrugged my shoulders.
"I don't know. All I know is that it's a formal event."
I really don't know where we're going. It's been a few days since Zahrah has arrived, and she's been far more of a joy now then she used to be. Yesterday her husband and kids joined her here, so that spiked her mood. She still hasn't had her baby yet and the due date was yesterday. There's a chance of enducing her labor, but she's adamant on letting the baby decide when it wants to make its grand entrance.
"Well that sucks," Camryn sighed from where she sat on my bed, flipping through her magazine. Because it's summer, a lot of people went on vacation, so there really isn't any business at the diner. Plus, Dianne went to the city to visit her son who broke his leg. Camryn decided to stay home and help Debby with the diner.
"I hate suprises with a passion, but this one I'm tolerating."
"Why?"
I shrugged in response.
"Because I forgave him, I guess. It's like I realized all the things Jafar is doing to make up for those ten months. It would have been eleven in a few days."
Camryn eyed me warily. "You kept track of the days?"
"I did. I was that pathetic, I know."
"Camryn shook her head frantically and widened her eyes.
"You weren't pathetic. You were just dealing with being away from someone you love."
I put the last pin in my scarf and sighed. The last few weeks have been much different than how they are now. The last few weeks were the time when everyone was figuring everything out and trying to make it, basically. Now it feels so...different. But a good different to be exact.
-*-
It turns out we were going to the city next to Riverside. I don't even know the last time I've been outside of Riverside. I've always stayed in my comfort zone, not leaving unless it's necessary and such. But now, as I look at the man holding my hand, and the restaurant he has taken me to, I couldn't be happier to leave the comforts of my childhood town. The restaurant is absolutely beautiful and elegant. There aren't any flashy colors, nor are there full patterns. It all looks so well together.
As we entered the restaurant, I looked around the place in complete 'awe', gawking at the set up and classy eatery that it is. It had to be expensive. It looks even better on the inside than the outside.
"I take it you approve of the restaurant?"
I closed my mouth before drool could come out and smiled at Jafar.
"Very much so," I confirmed and he smiled. "Why though? It's not a special occasion."
Jafars smile widened as he reached for my hand. We were now sat at a table, waiting on our waiter.
"Every moment with you is a special occasion."
Just like that time at the lake, we stared at each other deeply, reading each other's eyes for our emotions. And unlike last time, the look he had in this moment, only shows a speck of guilt. It's going to take more than sweet words to remove that emotion from him.
"Hello, my name is Sadie. May I take your--oh my God, you're Jafar Ibrahim!"
Jafar hesitantly looked up from our moment, but never leaving my hand bare from his.
"Indeed I am."
Sadie waved her hand in front of her mouth while squealing, alerting some of the other customers while she's at it.
"This is like a dream come true! I wanted so badly to see you perform, and then I was going to book tickets for your next show but you went on vacation to see your family, but I didn't know where, now I know! Oh God, can you please give me a autograph?!"
Me along with everyone in the restaurant stared at her with wide eyes. She was practically bouncing up and down as she awaited for Jafar's reply. I thought it would take him a moment to comprehend all of that as I had to, but no. Jafar is scribbling down his name on a napkin she gave him.
"Here you go, Sadie," He smiled. "Now if you don't mind, can we order."
Sadie frantically nodded again and pulled out her notepad.
"Whenever you're ready."
-*-
She. Won't. Stop. Staring.
It's been a little over an hour since we arrived, had our dinner and now dessert, but Sadie has been leaning on the wall by the kitchen, staring at Jafar like he's her lost love. Jafar is completely oblivious to the situation because she's behind him, but lucky me. I have a front row view.
"Ayah, don't you like your cake?"
Ignoring Jafar, I somehow got in a glaring contest with Sadie. She went from the psycho looking crazy fan, to the now creepy fan. Her eyes are now locked with mine as we have our own fight with our eyeballs.
From the corner of my eye, I can see Jafar studying my eyes before turning around to gawk at Sadie, who has not given up yet. My eyes are now starting to hurt, but this is a battle that I'm not sure why I have to win.
"We can leave, y'know?"
I shook my head out of my trance and turned to Jafar.
"What?"
"We can leave," He repeated, and nodded in the direction of Sadie. "If you're uncomfortable by the girl staring daggers at us, let's just leave."
I looked back at Sadie to see she hasn't moved yet.
"Yeah, that's probably best. I guess you have to call her back over here."
Jafar laughed before motioning towards someone to come over. Soon a guy with a manager name tag came over to get the money.
And I couldn't be more grateful.
-*-
Ice cream is really one of the best creations ever made, especially chocolate. It tastes better than anything I've ever tasted. I remember being fascinated with the flavor when I was younger. Anything that was chocolate and a good couple feet from my reach, I had to take it. Safeer even joked about me turning into a giant chocolate chip if I didn't stop.
"This is delicious. If I could eat this all the time, I would."
Jafar chuckled lightly while spooning another scoop of his green apple bubble gum. To a lot of people, one being me, the flavor sounds nasty but it's actually delicious. I would have gotten it, but I couldn't leave chocolate alone like that. That's cruel to the ice cream and my taste buds.
It's now almost Isha and we're walking around Riverside with Ice cream. Not many people are out right now. It's mainly just the dumpster people and the construction workers. A few shops are getting ready to close, but that's all. I would be lying if I said it didn't like the peaceful night air.
"It must be delicious. You have ice cream all over your mouth."
I widened my eyes and wiped my hand across my mouth. Very un-lady like, I must say so myself.
"You still look amazing, chocolate-y beard and all."
"It's very unattractive for a woman to have a beard, Jafar."
He shrugged.
"Nothing can make you look bad though."
I huffed in annoyance and sat down on a bench. Jafar sat down cautiously next to me.
"Why do you always compliment me like you're being paid to do it?"
He scrunched his eyebrows in confusion.
"I didn't think anything was wrong with it if it's the truth."
"But it seems like all you do is out of guilt, Jafar. I don't want you to feel this way."
Jafar nodded like he understood where I was coming from.
"I owe you everything, Ayah. Complimenting you doesn't even come at a price. That along with having you with me is a privilege."
My face softened. Okay, maybe I was a little hard in him.
"I love the compliments, I do. But please don't feel guilty."
Jafar scooted closer to me and placed his arm around my shoulder, not saying anything. Even to me, there was anything left to say. The time finally came for us to return home as it was getting late and darker outside. The evening has been nothing short or amazing and I wish it wouldn't end.
"I had a good time," I said once we stopped in front of my house and he parked the car. "Thank you for this."
He smiled over at me and took my hand in his, kissing it. "Always."
"Do you want to come inside?" I suddenly blurted out out of nowhere and he whipped his head in my direction. I could tell that my cheeks are probably red and the level of embarrassment is quite high, but I can't deny that I wanted to say that. "I mean," I looked over at him, "only if you want to. I don't want to force yo–"
"Force?" He laughed, and I couldn't help but find it funny myself. The only forcing I would do is to get him out of the house, not in it. "But yes, I do want to come in. Are you sure?"
"It has been a while since we've been together in one house, one room alone. Mama went out so she's not here."
"Are you trying to Netflix and chill me?" He mocked with a hand over his heart, and I couldn't help but let the barbaric laughter make way out of my throat. "Because if so, I accept."
"Then let's go inside."
The whole time getting out of the car I didn't feel like a nervous wreck like I did on my wedding night. We did but we didn't know each other, and now we know each other well. These last few weeks have been more amazing than what I was thinking in my head. That just goes to show you how your mind tries to reset the reality that you're living. It gives you these scenarios that haven't been written and would never happen. Yet we believe these scenarios and act as if the worst has happened, yet it's all in our heads. Sadly, there isn't a way to turn our minds off. But there is a way to live reality instead of dreaming the worst.
As I predicted, Mama is nowhere in sight meaning she's still with Diana at her home. Jafar closed the door and grabbed my hand, spinning me around to him. Our faces are now barely two inches from each other and both of our breathing comes to a halt. My eyes involuntary close at the moment we are now sharing, and my body goes stiff, not knowing what to do.
"Are you sure?" He asked for a second time, and just the mere fact that he did caused butterflies and move around in my abdomen. "Only if you're sure."
"I'm sure," I said, if possible moving our faces closer to each other so that they weren't far from touching. "Very sure."
That's all my confirmation took for him to close the distance between us as if it was the only thing keeping us alive. We both breathed no air yet it felt like we were taking a fresh breath. And so the night continued like this and so on. It's amazing how two words could begin such a night. And by Allah, I'm glad I said them.
Jafar:
July 29th
After letting a few days pass by, I finally decided to meet with him about our deal. Apparently it is urgent. I'm trying really hard, I am, but keeping this from Ayah isn't something that I want to do. I want to tell her of the hope we have of settling the disputes between my career and our marriage, but I can't get her hopes up. Not yet. As much as I hate to admit it, I have to lie to her and my family. It's the only way for this to work.
"I'm glad you decided to clear your schedule," The man I am meeting with greeted sarcastically, flipping through something on his phone. I ignored him and sat down.
"You said it was urgent," I phrased as a statement, and he lifted his head up from his phone to frown at me.
"Did I upset you, Jafar?"
More than you know.
"Not at all," I lied. "I was just having quality time with my family when you repeatedly text me."
He nodded in understanding.
"Okay, let's get down to business."
He pulled a black packet out of his bag and sat it in front of me. I stared at the folder for a while before raising an eyebrow.
"What am I supposed to do with this."
He rolled his eyes in annoyance.
"Well, there is only one way to find out. Open it."
I reached for the folder, shaking it to see if its contents were breakable. Good. All I can hear are papers. And by the way I was shaking it, nothing fragile would have survived that.
"Wow, I wasn't expecting this."
He nodded in agreement.
"I slightly was expecting the unexpected, but that was very unexpected."
I flipped through the next couple of pages, my eyes widening even more. This is all too much.
"This is all real? None of it is fake?"
He nodded his head.
"It's all real. I've heard about the recording studio a while back, but I never dove into the situation. Now I'm glad I did."
Everything in this folder will help me with our plan. I just have to get rid of the recording studio back in California though. Which means I have to leave again. But since I'm after a legal aspect of everything, I'll be there a while. But I can't tell anyone about this. Once I present my case to the recording studio, I'm sure they'll want to keep it on the down low like me.
And until I get everything squared away, I will have to do what I dread.
Lie.
-*-
Ayah:
"Thank you so much for meeting me here, Ayah. I thought that after I confessed to you that you would be upset with me."
My face softened as I stared at Jamila.
"It was your past, Jamie. All you can do is move forward."
She smiled at me and took a sip of her tea. Today I contacted Jamila to meet me at the diner so we could talk. It was a must for us to speak on these matters. Yes Jamila has two other sisters and a mother, but we've always been pretty close with each other. And now that's starting to show.
When she first came up to the table, she didn't look like her normal self. To people who don't know her, she probably looks as stunning as ever with her love of fashion, but I can see through her like I always could. She's hurting, and she needs someone to be there for her and listen, not admonish.
She was young. Everyone has done things they're not proud of, but we can't change that. All we can do is move forward.
"I don't want to talk about it today," She suddenly stated, staring down at her cup.
"Whenever you're ready," I assured her. "But don't wait four years like you did last time."
Jamila smiled at my joke and straightened up, seeming to relax. She's been tense since we sat down.
"Enough about me and my issues. How did your date go with my brother?"
"Better than I imagined," I smiled.
Jamila raised an eyebrow with a smirk.
"From the way Jafar explained Sadie, you weren't far from decking the chick."
My mouth hung open as I gawked at her. I don't know why I'm suprised though. She is Jamila.
"It was a minor glaring war, but it ended before it began."
I looked down at my drink, frowning as I thought of the writing academy.
Jamila sensed something was wrong and leaned forward, squinting her eyes at me. I didn't even flinch away. We're best friends and always could tell what the others were thinking.
"You're hiding something."
I didn't even deny it. I pulled out my acceptance letter to the writing academy and handed it to her. It didn't take her long to widen her eyes and look at me in happiness.
"Oh my Allah, Ayah, when are you leaving?!"
I frowned. "I'm not."
Jamila looked at me in disbelief before putting the paper up in front of my face.
"Ayah Badra Hammad Ibrahim, what the hell do you mean you're not going to one of the best writing academy's in the country?!"
"I sighed, knowing she would be very upset about my decision, but I made up my mind.
"I'm not going to go. I am not going to be a hypocrite."
Jamila seemed to know what I meant because she glared at me.
"It's about Jafar, isn't it?" She didn't give me time to answer before she continued. "I love my brother more than anything, I do, but come on. Start thinking of Ayah and not about Jafar."
"I'm not thinking about Jafar! I'm thinking about us Jamila--Jafar and I."
"That's all well and good when it's an anniversary or picnic, but not when its dealing with something you've dreamed of your whole life."
All in all, what she's saying is correct. But that still doesn't change anything.
"Habibti, don't say no yet. Wait a little while before you make up your mind--"
"I already declined the scholarship."
"Jamila's face softened.
"What."
I nodded.
"I did it before I came here. I have said it before and I will say it again. I will not be a hypocrite."
-*-
July 31st
Jafar walked down the street, hands in his pockets as he kicked random stones on the sidewalk. He was meeting the man today, and what he has today can determine what he does next.
He is so excited that he can't stop smiling. The mere thought of being with Ayah and everything coming together put him in a good mood alone. As he came across the certain car, he pulled the handle and sat inside.
"Did you get them?"
The man chuckled at Jafar's eagerness before passing him the envelope.
"Yes I did. Two tickets to California for next week."
Jafar looked up and frowned.
"That soon."
The man nodded.
"I'm afraid so. What are you going to tell Ayah?"
Jafar shrugged and looked over the tickets.
"I don't know yet."
"It can't be the truth if you want it to work."
"I know."
"So," The man sighed. "Whatever you do, don't break her heart again."
Jafar sat back in the seat and let out a deep breath.
"I don't intend to."
Even though he said it out loud despite the protests of his mind, he knew he should have listened to it. Because the only way for him to do what he needs to do, is to break her heart.
-*-
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