Bessie did not allow Catherine to forget her promise to recount every last detail of her time in Barnbury. It had now been four days since Catherine had first been permitted to visit Bessie, and she was most relieved to witness a daily improvement in her sister's state of health. Although she tired easily, she was becoming stronger as time went by – she had been seen picking up a pencil to sketch a little every now and then, a sight which greatly pleased Catherine. But Catherine also felt rather anxious – she knew that it would not be long before Bessie became restless, wishing to be allowed out of her bedchamber.
Much as Catherine wanted to see Bessie up and about again, she knew even without consulting Dr Lovell that this would not be advisable just yet. Bessie had a habit of overexerting herself in her desperate bid to return to normality, and far too many times this had led to a relapse on the road to recovery from illness. Catherine could not help but feel responsible for causing this particular ailment, and so was determined that this time nothing was to stand in the way of Bessie's recovery. She hoped, therefore, that by sharing her news from Barnbury she might capture Bessie's interest for a while, and distract her from her boredom.
Without much excitement occupying her life, Bessie was always a very attentive audience to Catherine's tales about any party or social event she attended. This particular tale had everything Bessie loved best – balls, romance, and drama – and she devoured every word eagerly, sighing wistfully and gasping with outrage in turn, before crying aloud and clapping a hand to her face in horror when Catherine told of her foolish behaviour with William.
"Oh, Catherine!" moaned Bessie in a rather muffled voice. "How could you have thought such a ridiculous thing? He is our cousin! You have known each other your entire lives, and there has never been so much as a glimmer of romantic affection from either of you! He has always been a perfect gentleman, giving kind-hearted compliments – why would you believe him to be in love with you?"
"I truly cannot say," replied Catherine grimly. This was turning out to be far more excruciating than conveying the news by letter. Bessie's horrified reaction brought back all the pain and mortification Catherine had originally felt that night at the ball; it was as if the wounds were being opened afresh, and she wished once again, more strongly than ever, that Bessie had been with her that night. Often having a great deal of time with nothing to do but think, Bessie was a shrewd, reflecting young girl, and although eight years her senior, Catherine regarded her sister's opinion highly. This reaction from Bessie therefore made Catherine truly realise the sheer idiocy of her actions.
"Nobody feels the pain and mortification as strongly as I," Catherine assured her sister.
"Except perhaps William," replied Bessie seriously.
"Oh, I cannot forgive myself for behaving so dreadfully with him!" wailed Catherine. "He was the only one in Barnbury besides my aunt and uncle who treated me with anything like kindness, and now he will despise me for ever!"
"There now, Catherine, I feel you are being a little dramatic," soothed Bessie gently. "William is a good man; with time I am sure he will forgive you."
A brief silence ensued, during which Catherine lost herself in her humiliation, while Bessie considered something thoughtfully.
"As for the other members of Barnbury society," Bessie said now, in a gentle attempt to change the subject, "Mr and Mrs Wilmot sounded pleasant enough people from what you have said."
"I thought so at first," muttered Catherine darkly, "but I do not see how Mr Wilmot can be such a decent man if he became friends with the horrid Professor Lawes."
Catherine expected her sister to nod earnestly in agreement at this point; after all, Catherine had just told Bessie at length about the professor's numerous failings, so her sister was aware by now of the sort of dreadful man he was. Bessie, however, simply lapsed into another thoughtful silence – and Catherine was certain she detected the hint of a smirk in her expression!
"I do not think Professor Lawes is all that bad," said Bessie slowly, in a very odd tone of voice.
"Not all that bad!" spluttered Catherine indignantly. Between his rudeness during the first dinner at Wyndham Hall and engaging two ladies to dance at once, Catherine felt very strongly that he was in fact the very worst kind of man! She comforted herself by deciding that Bessie's opinion was not to be counted on too much where matters of society were concerned, for the poor dear's only experience of it was from novels, in which things were often over-exaggerated.
"From what you have said, Catherine, it is clear that Professor Lawes lacks manners," Bessie continued now. "However, I do not think he would have meant to hurt your feelings. It is likely he just feels rather uncomfortable in society, and this shyness probably causes him to behave rather strangely. After all, I imagine academic society is extremely different to society in the country."
"That is precisely what Professor Lawes told me in the letter he wrote," admitted Catherine. Not for the first time, she found herself marvelling at her younger sister's maturity. For one so young, Catherine had never seen Bessie's equal for understanding people and getting the measure of them. Sometimes Catherine found herself forgetting that Bessie was only thirteen, for she often spoke with wisdom beyond her years.
"Professor Lawes wrote to you?" asked Bessie excitedly now. "When was this?"
Catherine smiled to herself, the excited twinkle in Bessie's eyes a reminder that her sister was in fact a child still, even if she did sometimes speak like a wise old woman.
"It was just after I had returned to Donbroke," replied Catherine, wishing she could change the subject but knowing full well that Bessie would want to hear more.
"I see," said Bessie simply, in an infuriatingly superior tone, causing Catherine to colour.
"It was not a romantic sort of letter," explained Catherine hurriedly. "He merely wrote to apologise for his abhorrent behaviour on my last day in Barnbury..."
And so Catherine launched into the final part of her Somerset story, taking care to fully elaborate on the demeaning way the professor had treated her, talking at length about the severe discomfort she had been subjected to on the walk back to Broxcliffe Park. Once she had come to the end of her tale Catherine sat back with satisfaction, feeling certain that there was no conceivable way now that Bessie could believe the professor to be a good man.
"He did not behave in a proper way," said Bessie, brow furrowed. Catherine nodded triumphantly at this, believing the matter of the professor's bad character now quite decided – but Bessie had more to say.
"I still do not think he would have meant to cause offence to you," she continued. "If he had, then why would he write to apologise?"
Catherine opened her mouth to protest, but Bessie went on before she could say anything.
"My guess is that he was not aware of the impropriety of his actions at the time. He has not often been in the company of young ladies, probably not for many years – I am sure he simply forgot the need for a chaperone. He would not have meant to cause offense, Catherine – for I believe he likes you a great deal."
This last statement was so completely ludicrous that Catherine burst out laughing, before stopping abruptly at the hurt look on Bessie's face.
"Come now, Bessie," scoffed Catherine, trying to keep her face straight. "You cannot be serious. If Professor Lawes does feel any sort of affection for me – heaven forbid! – then he has a very peculiar way of showing it."
Bessie heaved a dramatic, long-suffering sigh, as one would when dealing with a misbehaving child.
"I see that you are not to be convinced, Catherine, so let us finish with the subject for now," she said wisely. Catherine suppressed a giggle at her sister's matronly behaviour, not wishing to hurt her feelings further.
"As for the Russells," said Catherine, in an attempt to change the subject, "you must agree with me that they, at least, are not pleasant people?"
"Oh goodness, yes!" exclaimed Bessie. "They sound like quite a family! Miss Russell has no doubt become vain and foolish as a result of her mother's fussing, whereas it is likely Lord Russell suffers from lack of a male figure to guide him. We cannot be too critical, for it is understandable that the death of the late Viscount will have affected them all – but," here Bessie dropped her voice to a whisper, "I do wonder at my uncle's wanting Julia to become tied to such a family, titled or not."
Catherine felt very relieved to hear Bessie's opinion. Bessie had never been known to harbour ill-feeling towards any individual without justification, so to hear her speak this way gave Catherine hope that she had not been wrong to warn Julia about Lord Russell's character.
"You believe it is possible that Lord Russell might be a rake, then?" asked Catherine now.
"My aunt has never been one for idle gossip," said Bessie thoughtfully. "I do not think she would have said these things about Lord Russell unless she had heard them from a reliable source. Unfortunately, though, I think Julia will have to discover Lord Russell's true character, whatever that may be, for herself."
This was not what Catherine wanted to hear; she had been hoping that Bessie might have some pearls of wisdom to offer on how best to reconcile with Julia. Before she could voice this thought, however, the sisters were momentarily distracted by the appearance of Annie, the maid, in the open doorway to Bessie's chamber, clutching a letter in her hand.
"For you, Miss Taylor," Annie announced, bobbing a curtesy before crossing the room and handing Catherine the letter. The maid promptly took her leave while Bessie watched with interest as Catherine examined it curiously, before gasping with excitement as she noticed the seal.
"It is from Broxcliffe Park!" she exclaimed, eyeing the letter with eager anticipation. A bubble of relief swelled inside Catherine as she realised that Julia must finally have come to her senses. How coincidental that she had just been the loss of Julia's friendship – and now all was to be well again.
Catherine opened the letter with a contended sigh – but as soon as she began reading its contents, the bubble of relief disappeared with a pop. It was indeed Julia writing to her, but the words she wrote were so unlike anything Catherine could have expected that she found herself clapping a hand to her mouth in horror, praying it were all a nightmare. Bessie had by now picked up on Catherine's distress, and leaned in closer so that she might also read the following:
Dear Catherine,
I am sure my correspondence must be most unwelcome to you after the way I treated you when we were last together – in fact, I am not at all sure why I am writing to you, for you have no reason to listen to my woes after the perfectly horrid way I have behaved. Even if you choose not to read this, I simply need to get some things off my chest by writing – my head is so scrambled at present that I hardly know what to think. Oh, how I wish I had listened to your wise advice which caused us to quarrel in the first place! Alas I did not, and am paying most dearly for my folly.
Things have changed dramatically in such a short space of time, Catherine, and I hardly know where to begin. Perhaps it is best to begin by letting you know that I continued my acquaintance with Lord Russell after you left, which will not surprise you, I am sure. Recently though, our mutual affection has progressed beyond mere friendship. I had a suspicion of his partiality from the way he often singled me out in company, but I could not bear to get my hopes up in case I had misunderstood his intentions. However, his constant attentions led me, and in fact most of the ladies in Barnbury, to believe that Lord Russell would soon be making me an offer.
Mama fretted terribly, of course, with Papa being away, as she feared that Lord Russell might grow weary of waiting for Papa to return so that he might ask his permission for my hand. Sure enough, I was distraught to find upon calling at Wyndham Hall the other day that Lord Russell had removed to Bath for an indefinite period of time, quite without warning! That he would leave so suddenly could only have one explanation – he must indeed have lost interest in forming a match with me – and I cried myself to sleep that night, so devastated was I that my chance of happiness had been so cruelly snatched away!
This morning, however, bore tidings with a far more urgent cause for concern. Mrs Wilmot called at Broxcliffe Park with the news that she had been in the village and heard most troubling rumours about Lord Russell's business in Bath which she felt obliged to tell us, given the evident attraction between Lord Russell and myself. Rumours have been circulating, Mrs Wilmot said; the very same rumours you spoke of to me. People seem to believe that Lord Russell is busy gambling away his family's fortune in Bath, having dealings with all sorts of undesirable characters. This alone is bad enough, but there are further whispers of an unknown young lady's reputation being compromised!
You can imagine, I am sure, how severely this has affected me. I cannot bear the thought that the Lord Russell I have come to know and love – for I do love him, Catherine – is not the gentle, loving man I believed him to be, but in fact a wayward rake! I fear my heart is breaking; it causes me infinite pain and suffering to imagine what heinous deeds he may be committing in Bath this moment!
I called on Miss Russell just now, hoping to find a sympathetic companion – but upon my arrival it became clear that Miss Russell and her mother had already heard the rumour, and were in an even worse state than I! Miss Russell had no desire to listen to me lamenting my lost love; her main concern was her own distress at her brother's purported wickedness, for if he has disgraced himself he will have taken down his family's name with him, therefore ruining Miss Russell's reputation.
It greatly disappointed me to find Miss Russell such an unsatisfactory companion, for I felt she, of all people, would understand my pain. Mama, too, is at present in too severe a state of shock and distress to be of much assistance to me, and so I find myself completely alone, with a head full of disjointed thoughts I cannot begin to make sense of. I am in desperate need of someone to talk to, and although I have given you no reason to wish to help me, I must implore you to return to Barnbury, Catherine! I apologise profusely for my harsh words and cruel behaviour, for now I know how foolish I have been. You were right all along; you always have been wiser than me, and I am certain you would know the right words to say to me now.
I am aware, of course, that I do not deserve your kindness, especially at a time when dear Bessie requires your attention. A letter arrived from Papa yesterday with the news that she will make a full recovery, which was met here at Broxcliffe Park with much jubilation from Mama and me. Please let Bessie know that she is in our thoughts. If you do remain in Warwick, might I entreat you to inform Papa of the contents of my letter, for I feel certain he will wish to return to Barnbury at once.
Once again, my sincerest apologies for my behaviour – I hope you will eventually be able to forgive me.
Your foolish cousin
Julia
Catherine looked up once she reached the end of the letter to find Bessie gazing at her with a stunned, wide-eyed expression which no doubt mirrored her own. Perhaps Catherine ought to have been expecting something like this to happen, given Lord Russell's reputation - but she really had managed to convince herself that he wasn't such a bad man after all.
Any of the remaining anger towards Julia that she had been harbouring vanished at once, to be replaced with a deep sympathy for her poor cousin. Catherine only wished there was something she could do to ease Julia's pain – but of course returning to Barnbury was out of the question. She could not leave Bessie; not again.
"You had better let Sir William know what has happened," said Bessie quietly, interrupting Catherine's thoughts.
"Yes – I will find him now," said Catherine distractedly, rising from her seat and leaving the bedchamber without really knowing where her feet were carrying her.
As she wandered the house in search for her uncle, Catherine found herself in a state of much agitation. From the moment Julia had become involved with Lord Russell, Catherine's worst fear had been that he would break her heart – and now that it had happened, she ached to be with Julia so that she might comfort her. At the mere thought of leaving Donbroke, however, Catherine's insides began to squirm with guilt. Bessie had been in such high spirits the past few days; she could not bear to put her sister through the pain of being left again.
Catherine found Sir William sitting in the library, contentedly engrossed in a book – but his relaxed smile rapidly transformed into an expression of horror as Catherine hurriedly recounted the contents of Julia's letter. Once she had finished, Catherine felt it was best to allow her uncle a few minutes of privacy to digest the news, and so she returned to Bessie's room, still in somewhat of a daze herself.
"How did he take it?" asked Bessie as soon as Catherine entered the room, voice full of concern.
"He is in shock, naturally," replied Catherine, crossing the room and flopping down at the end of Bessie's bed. "Once it has all sunk in, I am sure he will wish to set off for Barnbury immediately."
"Had you not better pack your things, then?"
Catherine's head snapped up instantly, gazing intently into her sister's eyes to find Bessie blinking innocently at her.
"I cannot return to Barnbury," muttered Catherine, lowering her head again. "I cannot leave you again."
Catherine expected her sister to start sobbing with gratitude, but Bessie only tutted impatiently.
"Yes, you can," Bessie told her, "I am recovering perfectly well, and Mama and Papa will be here to make sure I have plenty of rest and do not overexert myself. Julia has more need of you than I do. It has been a lovely surprise to have you home this week, but you should return to Barnbury and conclude your visit."
Catherine simply gazed at her sister in astonishment, and as she took in Bessie's defiant expression, she found that to her horror her own eyes began to cloud over with tears. It pained Catherine so much to see Bessie so willingly sacrificing her own happiness for Julia's sake, when Catherine had not been able to sacrifice her own enjoyment for Bessie's. She felt certain that Bessie was only putting on a brave face at the moment; she would surely dissolve into tears the moment Catherine left, and she would not put her sister through that torment again, no matter how much she wanted to go with Sir William.
"I will manage perfectly well without you for another week or two," Bessie insisted now, just as Sir William appeared in the doorway.
"I will be leaving within the hour," he announced, raking a hand through his already severely ruffled hair. "Catherine, I know it is very unlikely you will wish to return with me, but I thought I had better ask just in case."
"Catherine will, in fact, be travelling to Barnbury with you," announced Bessie suddenly.
"Bessie!" hissed Catherine wildly, but her sister ignored her.
"She will just require a little time to gather her possessions," Bessie continued loudly. "Isn't that right, Catherine?"
Sir William was gazing between the two sisters, appearing confused, while Catherine fixed Bessie with a sceptical look. Bessie looked quite determined; did Catherine dare believe that she really would be fine on her own for a little while longer? Catherine needed to decide quickly, for every moment of hesitation was a moment more of delay for Sir William.
"Yes," Catherine found herself saying suddenly, almost without realising what she was saying. "Yes, I am coming with you."
It was against Catherine's better judgements, but Bessie was right – Julia needed her more, and it would not be long before Catherine was back home for good. And so that was how Catherine found herself, a few hours later, rushing back towards Barnbury barely a fortnight after she had left.