Marry him. Marry Forrest. Become a future princess then the future queen? With recent events I didn't really think about what direction my life was headed in. I never even thought about marriage. I like to consider myself as someone who always thinks ahead so I wouldn't be speechless in moments like these. This was all I ever wanted, wasn't it? To get my golden ticket out of my miserable life? I think what I failed to recognize as I made my plan to manipulate the princes in the beginning is that I wasn't escaping a cage to be free. I was escaping a cage just to fly into another one. That was before I actually fell in love with a man who claims I own his everything. But it goes both ways. The feeling I had of losing him forever was an unbearable pain. I even had a new found respect for Elise, who lost Michael and still continued on with her life. I wouldn't be able to.
So marriage actually wasn't that difficult of a concept. I could either live without him and go back home. Not feel threatened every time I walk out a door. Or, I could stay with him and try to fix the mess all of Illéa is in. If I do that, I would become a ruler of Illéa. Me. A girl who dreamt of not a knight in shining armor to come and rescue her, but dreamt of her parents walking through the front door of her foster home and reclaiming what they had left behind.
I got my knight in shining armor anyway, even though I hadn't wished for one. And he had issues that were going to be hard to deal with at times, but I would do it anyway because I loved him. I would love him anyway because he saved me from myself. I was drowning in a pool of self loathing and despair and he was the only one who bothered to reach down and grab my hand to save me. Forrest Schreave had stolen everything from me, but that wasn't a bad thing in my opinion.
"Lila, if you don't say something soon-"
"Of course I'll marry you." I say, tears pooling in my eyes. "How could I not? What kind of question is that?"
Forrest grins like he just won some big prize. He walks over to me on his knees to my side of the blanket and hovers over me until my back is pressed against the blanket.
"Lila Schreave." Forrest studies me like he will never see me again. "Has a nice ring to it," He leans down and when I think he's about to kiss me, he takes my hand in his. He pulls something out of his pocket before I realize it's a small black box. He pops it open with one hand and presents to me a beautiful diamond ring. "It was my grandmother's ring. She told my grandfather to give it to me if something ever happened, because she thought that if someone like me can fall in love the world isn't completely hopeless."
I laugh softly. "That sounds like a backhanded compliment to me."
"Oh, it totally was." Forrest smirks. "But I was a pretty obnoxious teenager with absolutely no morals. You can't really blame her."
"No, I guess I can't. You are pretty obnoxious."
Forrest laughs as he kisses the corners of my mouth. "Ready for a round two?"
****
I sit in a chair right beside Elise's bed. Her body looked so frail and delicate hooked up to all those wires and tubes. Her breathing was steady as I studied her red hair. The horrible feeling of guilt was too much to take so I grip the arms of the chair tightly. She was like this because of me.
"They told me that you could hear when I talk, that sometimes you listen. I know you probably hate me- hell, I would hate me too. But I want you to know that Romeo is alive and well. You saved him. Taylor may have thrown the shoe that stopped it from happening but she wouldn't be there in the first place if it wasn't for you. I just want you to know that I am sorry. I am so terribly sorry. And I promise you that when you wake up I will clean up your world for you. Right now, a war is breaking out between Germany and Illéa. You're probably safer here than you are out there." I take a deep breath and reach over to take her cold hand in mine.
A knock on the door catches my attention and I look over my shoulder to see Romeo in the doorway. He was using crutches that wrapped around his forearms and pants that covered up the absence of his leg. "Am I intruding?" He gives me a sad smile.
"Not at all," I sniff, not realizing my eyes were burning. I get out of my seat by her bedside as he takes the seat for himself. "Thanks," he says to me as he rests his crutches against the wall.
"I'll, uh, leave you two alone-"
"Cord- Lila, wait." Romeo says just as I place my hand on the doorknob. "Did Elise ever tell you what happened between us? Why I was so keen on speaking with her when I first came back here?"
I only shake my head. "It's none of my business."
Romeo looks over at Elise with a sad expression. "I owed her a lot, you know. I mean, I put her through a lot that she didn't deserve. I was a stupid teenager and I was friends with Forrest. So you can already tell how great of a person I was." He says sarcastically.
"Forrest isn't all that bad," I frown, feeling the need to defend him.
Romeo raises an eyebrow. "You didn't know him when he was in his teen years. He's considered an adult now, but Forrest and I used our titles to a certain advantage."
"Why are you telling me this?" Is the only thing I can think of to ask.
"Because I need to tell somebody. I need someone to hate me because Elise isn't exactly around to do it."
"Romeo, I could never hate you. How could you ask me of such a thing?"
"Just listen." Romeo says in a strangled voice. "Elise was always around. I remember how attracted I was to her, even as a little boy. Forrest was too. Harlan had always been a gentleman but I think it was mainly because he was so shy." Romeo still avoids my eyes as he plays with his pant leg. "So when I came around to visit again, when Forrest was spiraling out of control, I came only to help him out. He's my best friend, after all. Like my brother. But the last time I was there it had been at least almost a year and I didn't even see Elise then. But one night, when I had to practically drag Forrest out of the hallway because he was unconscious from a party, Elise was there. Oh man-" Romeo laughs harshly. "-was she beautiful. During my stay I helped Forrest like I promised myself I would do, but I couldn't stop myself from trying to get Elise. In every way that I could." He gives me a look like I should know what he's talking about.
"Anyway, I don't want to go into detail, but I slept with her. It was a two way streak of course, but it was my fault." Romeo puts his head in his hands and pauses for a moment. Like he's trying to collect himself. "I got her fucking pregnant. I couldn't be a father at sixteen. I couldn't marry Elise, no matter how much I wanted to. Besides, I was only sixteen. I was blinded by lust and now that we're older Elise made me realize we never actually loved each other."
"So you ditched her." I almost choke on my words.
"Not... Exactly." Romeo says carefully. "I told my parents everything. I wanted to bring Elise back here and maybe give her the life she deserved... But my parents told me that I couldn't marry a maid from Illéa and have her be the next queen of Italy. The best thing she could have been was a mistress to me and I didn't want that for her or my... Child."
"What's so bad about marrying a maid?" I ask, almost angrily.
"Nothing." Romeo says almost immediately. "But you must remember that my culture is much different from yours. My parents have certain standards that they don't even know are wrong. That's just how they were brought up. My father fell in love with a simple Italian woman and marrying her brought our country happiness to see a citizen become royalty. That's what was supposed to happen with me as well. That was my future."
I shake my head. "Where is this going? Elise obviously doesn't have a baby... Or is it back in Italy?" I ask but I know that isn't the case. I had a feeling that something was off by this whole conversation.
"No, it's not. She never had it. Elise lost it." Romeo runs a hand over his face. "I didn't even know she lost it until Forrest told me the day I met all of you ladies." He stops himself, staring at the far wall. "She went through all of that without anybody. For years I thought she and my kid were living here happily but I never bothered to check up on them. That's why I never really came back to Illéa after that, except when Forrest really needed me. I just avoided Elise and my child at all cost. When I wanted to confront her about it she wouldn't talk to me. I even thought going through her best friend would be easy," He laughs but it holds no amusement. "I owe her everything, Lila." Romeo says with his face looking broken and lost. I knew that expression all too well. "She couldn't even tell anybody because I told her not to. She trusted me and I just... I just left her. She doesn't deserve to be in this hospital room right now." He glances over at her. "I do."
"Romeo..." I trail off. "She wasn't alone."
He raises an eyebrow. "I know that but she couldn't tell anybody-"
"She fell in love with a guard. His name was Michael. He was killed during one of the attacks from The Mercenaries. She wasn't alone, Romeo." I tell him, not exactly sure how to process this information. "And I don't think she hated you either. She was hurt and the time you chose to talk to her was the worst possible time ever. Elise had just lost him and she was vulnerable."
Romeo's features crumble and he can no longer look at me again. "I didn't know."
"No one knew." I say sadly. "She had to keep it a secret because maids and guards weren't allowed to have romantic feelings for each other."
Romeo looks over at Elise and tilts his head to the side. "She doesn't deserve any of this. You should have let me die."
"Romeo, you're not allowed to say things like that." I say harshly. "She isn't dead, okay? What you did was horrible but it is forgivable. Elise is this way because she wanted to save you. Because she felt like she owed you. You need to stop letting the guilt eat you up alive or else you will eventually destroy yourself." I walk over to him and take his hand. This action surprises him but he doesn't remove his hand from mine. "I won't hate you because I can't. I don't have a right to. We have all done horrible things but those actions that we made built us into who we are now because we were able to learn from our mistakes. You almost died for a girl because you thought you owed her your life. Elise almost died for a boy because she thought she owed him her life. What you need to do to make it up to her now? Is forgive yourself."
I let go of his hand and walk toward the door once again.
"Lila," He calls out, not necessarily stopping me from leaving, but keeping me from going. "How do you know to say something like that? How do you know it's what I need to do?"
"Because I'm in the process of it myself." I answer honestly.
"Well," Romeo says in a lighter tone of voice. "You will make a wonderful queen, Lila. And the perfect wife for Forrest."
I turn around and give him a confused look. "How do you-"
"That giant rock on your finger isn't hard to miss." He shoots me a wink and that's how I know Romeo has already begun to do exactly as I told him.