Royal Pain in the Ass

By PunkRockPenguin

6.3M 75.8K 8.4K

Juliet has worked hard all of her life and everything she has she earned herself. Now her world is turning u... More

Royal Pain in the Ass
Chapter II
Chapter IV
Chapter V
Chapter VI (corrected)
Chapter VII
Chapter VIII
Chapter IX
Chapter X
Chapter XI
Chapter XII
Chapter XIII
Chapter XIV
Chapter XV
Chapter XVI
Chapter XVII
Chapter XVIII
Chapter XIX
Chapter XX
Chapter XXI
Chapter XXII
Chapter XXIII
Chapter XXIV
Chapter XXV
Chapter XXVI
Chapter XXVII
Chapter XXVIII
Chapter XXIX
Chapter XXX
Epilogue

Chapter III

247K 3.5K 612
By PunkRockPenguin

Chapter III: Where am I?

I woke up staring at a strange ceiling. I had to think hard. I looked around the room I was in. Well Toto, I definitely wasn't in Kansas anymore. I woke up alone in a strange bed. Alone, alone is good. I sat up and started taking everything in. Was I in a ritzy hotel? Think Jules, how did I get here. Then it started coming back.

A Duke of something . . . . England . . . . oh my god. Twenty-one years of accepting that my father was some sort of abstract idea, and I might have found him. What the fuck? I realized my luggage was in the room with me.

My phone was on the bedside table. I looked at it, and in Florida it would be nine o'clock at night which made it about one am here. I was a night owl and nine o'clock at night I would still be at work. I threw the covers off and realized I wasn't wearing my own clothes. That weirded me out more than anything. I was wearing a long silky gown. Was it really silk? I didn't own anything that was real silk so it was kind of weird. How did I get into this? I looked around the darkened room again. It was mostly done in golds and reds. It screamed Gryffindor tower to me. I found a lamp and turned it on. The room was positively gorgeous. The bed I was in was a canopy four poster that had to be at least king sized. It was huge. I had to admit the burgundy bedspread was pretty. I was more of a purple kind of girl, but I could appreciate a nice thing when I saw it. The walls were painted gold with an oriental border. The carpet was a deep red and plush and I scrunched my toes in it. I smiled. I loved the way it felt under my feet. I took a deep breath and the room smelled almost stale, like it wasn't lived in. There was no doubt of that. There was a fragrance to the room like someone tried to cover up the staleness. For some reason I felt suddenly lonely. I opened up my suitcase and pulled out a pair of my own pajamas and changed quickly. It felt good to be back in my own clothes. I was wide awake in a foreign house in a foreign country.

Now, I wouldn't exactly call myself stupid, but I'm not exactly known for making the best decisions when I'm bored. Actually, that's what led to two of my tattoos. So, being the bright person I am, I decide it's a good idea to go exploring. Don't ask me why, even I don't know.

I found my teal converse and put them on. I opened the door and it was pitch black outside. I grabbed my phone and put on the flashlight app and started off down a hallway. The place was huge. I started wondering in whichever direction seemed a good idea. I didn't bother remembering, I doubted I'd ever find my way back. Somehow, that just didn't seem important.

I found three secret passageways and it wasn't long until I ran into someone.

"Hi," I smiled.

"Hello there. Who, may I ask, are you?" asked a girl with blonde hair pulled up in a loose bun. She was wearing a black skirt that fell just below her knees over black stockings and a long sleeved black tunic looking shirt.

"I'm Juliet."

"Oh, so you're the one everyone is talking about." She had a coy smile playing across her lips, her brown eyes glinting.

"Me?"

"Yes,"

I pondered this. "Why?"

"Well, it's not my place to say, but what are you doing up at this hour?" she asked as she glanced at her watch.

"I'm not used to this time zone. I'm wide awake."

"That would explain it."

"What's your name?"

"I'm Gwen."

"What are you doing up at this hour?"

"I'm preparing the bedding for the morning. Why are you in the servant's corridors?"

"Is that where I am?"

"Are you lost?"

"Yes,"

Gwen burst out laughing. "Would you like help getting back?"

"Actually, could you just show me around?"

"I can't right now, but I can later."

"Why not right now?"

"Because I'm working." Gwen laughed.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm holding you up." I felt bad. I knew what it was like to be behind at work. "Nevermind, sorry."

"It's alright. How about I show you to your room?"

"That would be cool."

Gwen laughed as she led me through the servants' quarters to the hallway my room was on. "I tell you what, I'll be finished with the laundry at ten, I'll come back and show you around if you want. I'll come and do your bedding last."

"That would be amazing."

Gwen laughed. "Alright, well I have to get back to work. You should try to get some sleep. I'll see you around."

I went back in my room and pulled myself into bed. I checked my phone again and it was now almost four am here in England. I cuddled into the sheets and felt sleep pull me under.



I awoke to a soft rapping on the door. "Miss Benn? Are you awake? It's time to wake up. Breakfast is served at seven o'clock sharp.

"Are you serious?" I groaned. I did not do well on three hours of sleep. The last thing I wanted was to get out of my nice warm nest of blankets.

"I'm afraid so, Miss Benn."

"What time is it?"

"Six thirty."

Scratch that, two and a half hours. "Can you come in here?"

The door cracked open and a small, fragile looking woman entered. She had her ginger hair tied back in a braid and was wearing a uniform almost identical to Gwen's except hers came with an apron. "Yes, Miss Benn?"

"Is there somewhere I can take a shower?"

"Of course, the door to your right is your washroom."

I hadn't even realized there was a door there. "Oh, thanks."

"Is there anything else?"

"Not really. Oh, what was your name?"

"Me?"

"Yeah,"

"I am Laurel." She replied blinking her brilliant green eyes at me from behind her black, wire rimmed glasses.

"It's a pleasure." I dragged my butt out of bed and offered her my hand.

She shook it looking at me like I'd sprouted an extra head. "The pleasure is all mine." I wasn't sure why she looked so bewildered.

"Thanks, I'm going to get a shower, but I have a small request."

"Yes, my lady?"

"When I'm finished can someone show me where the dining room is?" I asked hopeful. The last thing I wanted was to miss food.

Laurel smiled. "Of course, my lady. I can wait for you if you like."

"That would be amazing!" I hugged her and she stiffened up. "Thanks, it'll only take me ten minutes!"

I ran to my luggage and pulled out my bag of toiletries and ran into the bathroom. I looked around. It was huge! You could fit at least seven people in the black marble tub. The floors were the same carved black marble with little veins of gold running through it as the tub. The walls were a cream color with hints of gold in it. I was in heaven. I started the water and brushed my teeth as I let the tub fill. The only downside to this bathroom was there was no shower, but with a swimming pool for a tub, I think I could manage. I giggled to myself as I let myself fall into the warmth of the water. It was positively delightful. I washed quickly and grabbed one of the huge fluffy red towels monogrammed with an E. I dried and realized I'd left my clothes in the room. I wrapped my hair in a towel and wrapped one around my body, I didn't want to drip water all over the plush carpet. I snuck back into my room and found it surprisingly empty. I wondered where Laurel had gone as I went to my suit case and pulled out a pair of jeans, one of the few without any tears or rips in them, and a plain black t-shirt. I had a funny feeling that what I'd packed wasn't what this family was used to seeing. I shrugged and decided that it didn't matter. I ran a brush through my still drying hair. If I left it to its own freewill, it would usually make pretty waves and I was feeling especially lazy today. I didn't usually wear make-up, but I decided to wear some eye liner and shadow, just a little. I didn't like it when it looked like I was wearing make-up, just enough to hint. One of the things my mom used to tell me was when you have to wear make-up to be pretty, you aren't.

I sighed and looked at myself in the mirror. The eye liner always made my grey eyes pop and with a hint of silver on my eyelids I knew how I looked. My black hair was dryinginto nice waves. I smiled as it decided to cooperate with me today. It was the closest I came to lying low. I didn't know why I felt like I did today. It wasn't like me. I usually didn't give a damn about what people thought of me, but somehow I was feeling the slightest bit insecure. This whole situation had thrown me for a loop. After twenty-one years of accepting that my father was not more than an abstract thought, I may have found him, or rather he may have found me.

I opened the door to see Laurel waiting for me.

"Are you ready, my lady?"

"Yeah, were you waiting out here the whole time?"

"Yes, you asked me to wait."

"Oh, you could have waited in there with me, I would have hurried more. I'm sorry."

Laurel looked at me with the same bewildered look. "There's nothing to be sorry for."

"Um, okay then." I shrugged. "What time is it?"

"It is almost seven."

"That's not bad, even for me." I smiled. Getting ready was something I could do in a jiffy if I had to.

Laurel fought back a smile.

"Why fight a smile?"

Laurel looked taken aback. "Pardon?"

"If you want to smile, smile. Don't fight it. Smiles are precious. Enjoy every one of them."

This earned me a small smile. "The dining room is this way."

She led me through a maze of corridors and hallways twisting this way and that. Yeah I was definitely lost. She presented me to an archway and at the table James was sitting so was Angelica and another woman who I could only guess was Millie, his wife. She looked like she was in her early thirties, but she had to be older, Angelica was at least sixteen. Probably older, but not based upon the way she acted. "Good morning," I offered, waving to everyone. They all looked up. James smiled, but Angelica and Millie didn't. Millie looked much older when she scowled, I immediately added at least ten years to her.

"Breakfast is served at seven o'clock sharp," Millie scolded.

I pulled my phone out. "Sorry I'm five minutes late. I kind of got lost. This house is a maze." Millie had honey brown eyes, I'd never seen such a warm color look so cold. "I'm sorry if I offended you."

"Don't be silly," James smiled. He shot his wife a warning look. "Come, sit, join us."

"What are you wearing?" Angelica sneered. I looked down.

"Clothes last time I checked."

"You'd actually go out in public dressed like that?"

"Yeah,"

Angelica shook her head and looked at me like I was looney.

"Anyway," I looked around the table, only James was paying attention to me. Millie's shoulders, which had been a graceful arch before she saw me now held tension in them. I also noticed her jaw was clenched and she seemed downright angry with me. "So, what's for breakfast?"

"Whatever you like," James smiled. "The cooks here are really phenomenal. Eleanor," he called and a plump woman looking to be in her early thirties came in, a warm smile on her face. There was something about her that just screamed 'Mom' at you. She just had this maternal heir.

"Yes, Master James?" she asked. "What can I get for you?"

"When will my eggs be ready?" Angelica growled.

"They're coming, my lady." Eleanor smiled. I cocked an eyebrow. If some brat talked to me that way I wouldn't be smiling. Then again, I just met her, maybe she wasn't always this bad. Somehow I doubted that.

"Juliet, what would you like for breakfast?" James asked.

"Um, I'm good with whatever." I shrugged. "Maybe some French toast?" I asked.

Eleanor smiled at me, it was a different smile than she used for Angelica. This one seemed genuine. Interesting. "Most certainly, my lady. Would you like some tea?"

"That'd be nice." I replied. "Anything with caffeine would be greatly appreciated."

"Anything else?"

"I'm good with that."

"Master James?"

"No, that's all. Thank you Eleanor."

Eleanor disappeared again and I was left sitting at the table feeling awkward. This was a new feeling for me. Another servant came in and whispered something into James's ear.

"Ah, I have an important phone call, I'll be right back. Everyone play nice."

I watched James leave the room.

"I'm Juliet, it's nice to meet you," I offered my hand to Millie.

"I am Duchess Mildred Agatha Harrison Eastgate." She responded coldly.

"Well, it's a pleasure." I replied, my tone flat as I dropped my ignored hand. The silence was thick. I started taking in the dining room, it was done in yellow and green tones, and it was overall a comfortable room. The table was a ten seater and looked almost forlorn with only the three of us. Millie and Angelica were having a silent conversation with their eyes. Honestly, I was surprised they weren't talking about me right now in front of me. I couldn't wait to hear what they'd say behind my back. "Well, it's delightful chatting with you. By the way, what would you like me to call you?" I asked to Millie. "I know James calls you Millie," I saw her visibly flinch when I called her that. "and I'd imagine Angelica calls you Mom. So, what would you like me to call you?"

"Duchess is fine."

I cocked an eyebrow. "You want me to call you Duchess?"

"Yes,"

I tried to fight back a laugh, but sniggered anyway.

"What is so humorous?"

"That just makes me think of calling a dog." The look on her face was priceless, I saw her shoulders hunch and the look of raw indignation on her face. I'd seriously just insulted her. I forced myself to stop laughing and regained control over myself. "I'm sorry, it's just what it makes me think of."

"Why are you even here?" Angelica sneered.

I shrugged.

"We aren't stupid." Angelica continued.

Eleanor picked that moment to bring in everyone's breakfast. Angelica had ordered fried eggs, Millie some rye toast and my French toast with powdered sugar. My mouth started watering.

"Thank you Eleanor," I beamed.

"Would you like syrup?"

"Yes, please!"

"Maple or blueberry?"

"Maple please."

"I'll be right back with that,"

Eleanor was almost out of the room when Angelica made a noise of disgust.

"Excuse me!" Angelica hissed. "Didn't I tell you I wanted my yolk not runny?"

"I'm sorry, my lady,"

"Sorry isn't good enough! How hard is your job? Or Ferdinand's for that matter? I give one simple order and you can't even do that right!"

"Will you chill out?" I snapped.

"What did you say to me?"

"Don't talk to her that way. I'd say her job is pretty difficult if she has to put up with you every day. And if it's so easy, as you claim, let's see you fry an egg."

"Who do you think you are? You can't tell me what to do!"

"I'm not going to just sit here and watch you scream at her when first off, it's not her fault, secondly, it's not that big of a deal, and thirdly, no one else is going to stand up for her."

James chose this moment to walk back in. He saw me glaring at Angelica, who had quickly put an innocent look upon her face. Millie was giving me a scathing look.

"Ladies, what did I miss?"

"James, darling, this girl just started screaming at Angelica. I wonder if it was wise to invite her here."

"Juliet?" James asked, eyeing me closely.

"Mr. Eastgate, I'm sorry but your daughter is a brat. Yes, I yelled at her. I yelled at her because she was yelling at Eleanor about a little bit of her egg yolk being runny. It's a simple fix, and where I come from, civilized people don't talk to one another like that. Perhaps things are different here. Or maybe you guys have a different opinion than us Americans of civilized. Either way, I don't like watching others being publicly berated, especially when it isn't their fault."

James nodded, and his face was stern. "Juliet, please come with me." I stood and followed him out of the room. Great, between his wife and his daughter I was already an object of hatred. Now I had him too. Maybe I should just go home. He led me a little down the corridor. "First of all, I would like to apologize for my daughter's behavior,"

I was taken aback. He wasn't taking her side?

"Angelica is, as you put it, a brat. She has a tendency to be overdramatic and put things out of proportion. Please don't think ill of her. She can be that way, but she also can be a sweet, loving, sensitive girl. She is spoiled, but that tends to go with the lifestyle we lead. She doesn't know how to act around you yet. I ask you not judge her, at least not yet."

I nodded. This was so not the direction I expected this conversation to go.

"I also have a small request."

"What's that?"

"I have an expert here that can give us a definitive answer about us. If we are as I suspect."

"Um, sure? What do I have to do?"

"He'll just swab the inside of cheek, and we can have a result by the end of the day."

I nodded. "Okay, where do I have to go?"

"I've brought him here. It would look at bit ostentatious for us to go anywhere. Especially if the press saw."

I nodded. "Don't want the media to get a hype over nothing."

James gave a bitter laugh. "Something like that." James nodded. He led me to a nice looking man in a lab coat; he got the sample and was off. James sighed and watched the lab tech walk off. "Now that that's settled," he started after a long moment. "would you like a tour of the grounds?"

"That would be amazing actually." I smiled.

_________________________________________________________________

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