{I hope you like this one. Sorry if its a little long and its kinda all over the place. But I tried to make like You have PTSD (sort of) and Steve has to from fighting in the war and stuff and yah. I hope you like it!}
It had been a lovely night so far, you were enjoying being at one of Tony's lavish parties. As you sat at the bar with a few other Avengers. Wanda sat at your right, Pietro next to her and then on your left was Natasha and Bruce. You all sat drinking, talking and laughing until Wanda started to get a bit restless as in she was mindlessly playing with her powers. She was moving her drink about and such,
"I think Wanda's drunk." Nat said to you. You nodded in agreement as Wanda who was normally mature was acting very childish her normally pale face had now turned a bright shade of red. You turned around to examine the party and then you saw him.. Mr. Captain America standing over in a corner talking with Sam. He was in a leather jacket and a blue shirt that hugged his chest. His jeans were loose and his golden hair was sort of messy but it was adorable. You had always had a thing for Steve, ever since you had joined the Avengers, you took an immediate liking to him. Although lately your feelings had begun to blossom a lot more, you loved his eyes the most, that blue as the ocean color, they were were mesmerizing and you often found yourself getting lost in them.
Wanda leaned over to her brother giggling and looking at (Y/n) who was busy staring off into space.
"I have an idea. Do you want to see her fears?" Even though she could read minds she has trouble reading (Y/n) she only could get bits and pieces. She never got her fears though, Wanda had no idea what (Y/n)'s fears and she wanted to see what they where and also since she was drunk she thought it would be a nice party trick.
Pietro didn't respond to his sister. Well he didn't really even have time too even though he had super speed. Wanda leaned over to (Y/n) as red magic surrounded her head,
He was there. The man with crazed eyes and wild hair. He looked at you, laughing as he had you on the cool metal table. You were strapped down and the room was dimly lit.
He was the man who made you the way you were. He started to come at you with a syringe in one hand and a knife in the other. He was still laughing, it was agonizing. It was almost like a wheeze but it sounded psychotic. You shook my head back and forth. You screamed and fought against your restraints.
"Stop fighting. We haven't even begun then experiment yet." He said his voice like nails on a chalkboard and then sliced your arm with the knife and stuck the needle in. Suddenly your veins felt like fire, the same pain. You knew this pain and you hated the pain. You screamed and shook violently. He was still laughing the same agonizing and psychotic laugh.
" SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP!" You screamed at him through gritted teeth and shaking your head wildly. He stopped for a moment and smiled.
"There's the insanity, I'm looking for. All your powers are great but driving you to madness is the best one I've given you! And you can control when you go insane! You'll be the ultimate weapon!" You broke free of your restraints and shot up off the table. You grabbed a knife from the small table next to you and lunged at him. You pinned him up against the wall,
"I didn't ask for this! I didn't want to become this monster!" You yelled.
"You are my beautiful monster." He said caressing your cheek.Suddenly you heard a glass break.
You looked around to see a hundred people looking at you in shock. You looked back at him, but he wasn't him anymore. You had a waiter pinned up against the wall with your dagger to his throat,
"P..please don't kill me." The waiter pleaded. Suddenly you heard his laughter again and he was everywhere. You screamed dropping the dagger and ran out of the room trying to get away from the nightmare. You dropped to the ground in the hallway after your legs started to give out. You were crying,
"The ultimate weapon." You heard him say. You covered my ears.
"No,no I didn't ask to be like this! I didn't want to be a monster." You sobbed.
"(Y/n)?" You heard a sweet, soft voice say. Steve. You looked up and he was in front you, he crouched down and looked at you. He slowly reached out and gently touched my arm, you flinched a little but eventually relaxed and Steve then carefully removed your hands from your ears all while still holding eye contact with you, he moved slowly, cautiously his pale blue eyes were full of concern and sympathy. Another tear rolled down your cheek, Steve smiled softly and wiped it away.
"(Y/n), what happened?" He asked quietly. Afraid that saying anything just above a whisper would scare you.
"I...can we talk some where else?" You replied quietly. You could still hear the sounds of the Party which didn't seem to stop even after you had just tried to kill a innocent man. Steve merely nodded and stood up, holding his hand out to you. You grabbed his hand and he pulled you up. You were inches away from his face and he smiled sweetly at you.
"My room is just around the corner. Are you alright if we go there?" He asked. You nodded, Steve always a gentleman still living in the 40's. He gently held your hand as he led you to his room, giving a little squeeze every now and then. You could still faintly hear that psychotic laughter.
You both walked in and Steve's room was much bigger then your own, probably because he was after all a Captain. He had a small living room and a small red couch with a coffee table in front of it. He sat down on the couch and you did the same.
"They didn't give me a couch." You mumbled partly as a joke and partly as a complaint.
"There she is." Steve said smiling again. You had never seen him smile so much around you. Normally he is all serious and follow orders guy. But probably he is just trying to help make you feel better.
"What do you mean?" You replied.
"The sarcastic girl I know who is more sarcastic then Tony." You smiled a little then it faded as you heard it again.
My beautiful monster.
You shook your head and few tears fell down your cheeks.
"(Y/n) will you tell me what happened?" Steve asked. He looked at you concerned.
"I just relived a nightmare that I had tried to forget. When I was a guinea pig for HYDRA they did so many things to me, they gave me my powers which is torture enough but when they had finished with me. They handed me over to a man who..who" You choked. Letting all the bad memories rush back in.
"You don't have to tell me." Steve said. You smiled weakly at his politeness but you knew talking it out with someone would probably help you.
"No..no I'm fine. The man they handed me over to had no name. But he was insane and had no concern for humanity. But HYDRA and the man himself wanted to try an experiment on me, give me a secret weapon, Insanity. Give me no regard for humans but just when I'm told to kill. I kill. A lot like what Bucky went through but different. I could be triggered and I am the trigger. I can trigger myself and its so hard to wake up and not go insane. I have to fight it. But the man.. His eyes had no color to them and he always called me his beautiful monster. Which is true.. What I did back there at the party was only a fraction of what would happen if I went insane. I am monster. The thing that is clear to me is his laughter.. It was psychotic..repeating.." You were crying now. You were sobbing thinking about what happened. Steve looked at you, his face was stern but his eyes were sad. He pulled you onto his lap and hugged you. He stroked your hair as he spoke,
"Sh..shh.. Its alright (Y/n). You aren't a monster darling. I promise, I will help you through this.. The whole team will. I know what its like trying to forget the unforgettable but you'll push through this. You'll get better. I'm with you every step of the way." Steve whispered to you. You were crying even harder. Steve let go of you and swiftly turned you so you faced him.
He wiped the tears away caressing your face gently. You stared at his Pale blue eyes and he stared at your own (Y/e/c) ones. He smiled sweetly then suddenly his lips were on your own. You felt your heart explode and fireworks were everywhere. The kiss wasn't passionate or fast. But slow and old-fashioned.. it was romantic. You forgot at that moment what happened.. What you had been through. You were just focused on the kiss and you were focused on Steve.
He pulled away and was blushing uncontrollably. You smiled a little,
"You didn't kiss me out of pity did you?" You asked because the soldier had never shown any affection towards you. He just treated you like a coworker really..
Steve looked shocked for a moment then quickly replied,
"No! I don't kiss people randomly like that.. Yeah I know I'm old fashioned.." He started blushing and looked down.
"Truth is (Y/n).. I think I'm in love with you. Ever since I saw you when we saved you on that mission. I wanted to sweep you off your feet but I don't really have those kind of flirting skills anymore.." He finished and looked back up at you afraid that you would reject him.
You laughed.
"Steve your adorable. But truth is that I think I'm in love with you too." You replied. Suddenly, Steve's lips were on yours once more. Then he pulled away hugged you,
"You aren't a monster and you never will be. I love you (Y/n). I promise to help you through this." Steve said and kissed the top of your head.
You spent the rest of the night cuddling and talking about each of your own nightmares. Both knowing you have to open up to start healing.
{Well there yeah have it! I hope you enjoyed it! I might do a part two of this where the reader learns that Wanda caused her to relive her fears or something I'm not sure. Tell me what you think! Byee}