to screw something completely up is an art
****
IT OCCURRED TO me that I completely screwed up last night.
The first impression between Mila and I just deflates all hope I've ever had of talking to her.
Well, there goes my only chance, I was angry with myself.
The thing with being a socially awkward person, who also doesn't have a filter, is that I'm never aware of my actions when I'm drunk. Only when I'm out of my mind and become a walking Pinocchio, do I say things I wouldn't normally say. And Mila just so happened to witness that disaster.
I was ecstatic when I saw her watching me from the corner of her eye, but that only made it blurry for me to realize that I was talking to her. And of course, I had to screw it all up...
The thing that also occurred to me was that a girl was sleeping next to me. And right at that minute, she woke up.
"Jacky?" She rolled over, a lazy smile on her face. I saw that she was naked, and I internally groaned. Who is she? "Last night was amazing."
"Oh?" I sat up on the bed, looking around the room to see that it wasn't mine. I checked under the covers and saw that I was still wearing my pants.
I nervously glanced around her room, looking for the door, when I saw her roll over and face me.
"We should do that again," she looked up at me expectantly.
I sat paralyzed and shocked to reply. It was getting more and more awkward by the second since we didn't sleep together.
"Hey, I'm pretty sure we didn't sleep together," I said to her, trying to make note of any changes on her face. "Hailey, right? Look-"
"How dare you?" The girl cut me off and started screaming. "Not only do you forget my name, which is Trish by the way, now you're accusing me of lying about last night?"
"I'm really sorry for the mix-up, but I think you're confusing me with someone else. My name isn't Jacky. I'm even wearing my jeans from last night."
"Oh," she stopped her hand, which was almost about to collide with my face. "Shit, you're right. You look nothing like Jacky."
"Yeah," I muttered. "I'll get out of your room then. It was nice to meet you, even though you were about to hit me."
Trish's mouth hung open, but she nodded her head in agreement. She silently pointed me to the door on my right and I ran out of there as fast as I could. I called my friend, Mike, and told him to pick me up. He agreed with an annoyed grunt and hung up.
"Ah fuck" I cursed. "This couldn't get any worse."
----
After Mike picked me up, he drove me to my house where I hastily got ready since I had a class in the morning.
When he and I got to campus, we saw Mila and her friend talking to a group of other girls. I always thought of Mila as "Ms. Unattainable". It's been three years since I first saw her. It was merely pure curiosity at first, but now I could tell she was slowly falling apart since my gaze always went to her whenever we were in the same area. I could recognize the signs, but I knew I couldn't simply approach her and tell her she looked sad. I trusted the fact that she had her friends to help her, yet I knew it deep down that she was like me, she didn't want to burden anyone by expressing her feelings.
I obviously regret saying nothing this entire time, but now I was definitely not going to show my face after last night's debacle.
Although, once again to remind me, that didn't go the way I wanted it to go because of my stupidity.
As I was trying to discreetly glance at Mila, Seth approached Mike and I. Seth has been my longest friend and he knew everything about me, which meant he knew about Mila. Right after him, our other friend Fletcher walked up to his as he was fixing his jacket.
"What are we looking at?" Fletcher asked.
Seth took out a cigarette and handed one to Mike, who took it without a word.
"Zozo's crush," Seth put the cigarette to his lips and took a long drag. He then crushed the butt beneath his heel.
"Shut up," I grumble. "I don't exactly like her."
"No," Mike speaks up. "You're in love with her."
Everyone around me laughs and I feel my ears get hot. At the same time, I notice Mila's friend looking over at Seth constantly.
"Why don't you just go up to her?" Fletcher stole Mike's cigarette.
"And say what?" I roll my eyes. "'Hey, I've had feelings for you for a long time and I hope I don't sound creepy, but you want to go out sometime?'"
"That's a start," Fletcher said. "Also, that girl in the blue shirt keeps looking over at you Seth. You know her?"
"No, but I will in two seconds." Seth goes up to her and the girl immediately blushes. We can't hear them, but soon after, she drags Mila out of the parking lot and into the school building.
"What did you say to her?" I asked as he came back.
"Nothing too serious," Seth waved off. "Also, hear me out, I have a crazy idea which I think will help you."
"What," I leaned against Mike's car, laying my elbow on the hood.
"Don't react just yet, but I was thinking a bet."
"That's stupid," Fletcher hit Seth's back. "Are you in middle school?"
Mike shook his head as well in disappointment.
"Hear me out," Seth clicked his tongue, repeating himself from before. "Think of this as a push to get you in the right direction."
I turned my head to look at Seth.
"What's the bet?" I asked, but also grimaced at the same time. "And don't call me that."
Seth looked at the guys then at me and said, "If you make Milana Finley fall in love with you, we'll finally find ourselves girlfriends and each of us will give you a 100 bucks. Also, that's my nickname for you, Zozo, deal with it."
These guys have zero clue about commitment. Let me rephrase that, none of us have a clue. However, now that Seth had this idea, there was no way he'd ever shut up about it unless I accepted.
"No, you guys can't do that. Also, that's wrong to approach someone with those kinds of intentions."
"Man, let us figure that out. Besides, you're not one to drop a bet and not accept free cash." Seth stated. "Think of this as a win-win."
"Fine," I sighed, knowing that I won't be able to back out of this. "I accept your bet."
So much for not succumbing to peer pressure.