Twelve: Home is where the heart is.
Dan:
"But we've watched that so many times!" I complained, as the DVD I had just inserted into the television had began to play. It was Big Hero 6. As much as I was obsessed with the marshmallow robot, there was a limit on how many times I could watch it.
Phil didn't understand that limit; limits didn't apply to him.
Phil dramatically rolled his eyes and huffed, holding out his arms, inviting me to crawl back into and cuddle him some more. That's all we spent the morning doing- cuddling. That's all we did last night. Not that I was complaining, I actually enjoyed it. I felt safe when Phil wrapped his arm around my waist, with his head nuzzled in my neck, our legs intertwined.
It was perfect but of course, perfection couldn't last forever.
But for now we just pretended. We held each other close as the animated movie played on screen, neither were really paying attention to it but it was just an excuse for us two to be close together. We didn't get much chance of that, to be close, as we were always at school or with people we had to hide ourselves from. Thankfully, with my mum around we could be ourselves.
For the second time in the last twenty minutes, Phil's phone had vibrated twice and at first he had ignored it, but this time he seemed hesitant.
"You can answer it, you know." He jumped, his eyes wide as he looked at me. I smiled, he was so adorable. "I don't mind, I'll pause the film whilst you answer it."
Phil nodded, he looked a bit more assured this time. With a small sigh, he picked up his phone. He frowned. From his facial expression, I couldn't really tell who it could be. I had my thoughts but they all seemed too bitter of me to assume.
However, my notions did seem to be true. Maybe I should give myself more credit, I was always one to self-depreciate myself and downgrade everything I did- that was my downfall in life. I began to wonder if Phil had a downfall, I assumed he would as it was too naïve of me to say he didn't have a flaw. Everyone does; some are more obvious than others. It's the way of life I suppose, everyone is flawed in such a flawed world.
"It's Ryan." Phil was still frowning, he was looking down at his phone; his eyebrows furrowed and forehead creased. I was frowning too. "He wants to go on another date."
Jesus, we had a double date last night and already Ryan was thirsty for more. To be honest, I don't blame him. I mean, have you seen Phil?
"Oh." I mumbled. I felt bashful. I felt stupid, naïve. Of course Phil would go back to Ryan, he was so much more fitter than me, he had the charm and the good looks too- he had it all; whilst I had nothing. Maybe my dorky knowledge and, as my mother likes to say, a quirky personality but that was nothing to compare with Ryan. God, I was a joke to him.
Phil must have sensed my distress as he looked up at me. I was looking at him too. Phil's face was only a few inches away from mine, I felt nervous. I wasn't sure why but I did. That was another downfall of mine: constantly being nervous. "I don't want to go with him."
It was my turn to frown now. "What?" I was confused, he was pulling my leg right?
"I mean... I want to go on a date sure." Phil admitted, rather sheepishly. "But not with him."
"Oh." I replied rather dumbly. "With who then?"
Phil laughed, his head thrown back as he laughed. It was truly a beautiful sight.
"With you."
My eyes widened. "Seriously?"
Phil had stopped laughing but a cheeky smile was now prominent on his pink lips. "Seriously."
The T.V had turned off due to leaving it so long on pause. But that wasn't my main problem right now. Phil Lester wanted to go on a date with me- kill me now.
Well maybe not right now, maybe after the date so I can finally die happy and not in a depressed state that my fourteen year old self thought. I had to bite my lip to contain the manly squeal I wanted to let out right now.
There was a silence for a few minutes. It was peaceful, we had resorted to cuddling again, Phil's face in my neck which I loved. The blissfulness was soon broken when Phil sat up a little and looked at me, thinking something over. I knew this as he was chewing on his lip, something he did only when he was debating to say something or not. Usually he decided against speaking up but this time, he actually said what was on his mind.
"Hey, Dan." He was still staring at me, his lip still trapped between his teeth. "If the time came - and I don't mean to sound cliché, or sound like all those old romance films but... if the time came, would you run away with me?"
I cocked my head, what was he trying to get at here?
"Like, if it all got too much, would you run somewhere far away, where we could be together. Me and you; together, forever. Like we should have been."
He was still chewing on his lip and I desperately wanted to pull his lip away from his teeth. "I like you so much, Dan. I really do. I don't like Ryan. I want to be with you, you're the only one that makes me happy."
"So..." He trails off, as if to create a dramatic effect and all this melodrama is driving me crazy. "Will you?"
"I-I don't know... It's a lot to ask." I sigh. I think about it, but I don't delve too deep into it because I know I will just back out of it. I want to do this, Phil's right: this is the only way we can be together.
So I nod and say,
"Yes. I will run away with you." I smile and he smiles too. And Oh God, I nearly die because he is so cute and so is he. I still pinch myself over the fact that Phil is my soulmate.
"Do you want to know why?"
"Why?"
"Because, dearest Phil, home is where the heart is-" I begin,"And you are my heart, therefore you are my home."
X
This was cheesy af but who the hell cares bc I love cheese so......
(but phil doesn't :(((((((((((((((((((((((( r00d)
Anyway, how are you all doing? Are you all good? Are you all eating and drinking regularly and getting enough sleep?
Since I last posted I have got a job and idk how to feel about this I have too many adult responsibilities now I don't like this. Don't grow up kids, it's not fun.
I have the next chapter planned and it's quite funny, I was giggling to myself whilst I wrote the plan out but then again that doesn't mean anything because I laugh at things like moon moon.
Yeah I'm rambling.
ily guys x