It's a few days later, camp is going great. We play Sweden tonight so we are currently in London waiting to play at Wembley. We are all walking around the pitch, just taking it all in. Leah hasn't left my side since I joined up with the squad.
Leah: you ready for this?
Maddie: ready for anything with you
Leah: I love you.
Maddie: I love you too captain.
She kisses my cheek before walking away.
The game starts. Me and alessia are up front.
I pass to her, I break through their defence and she passes back to me. I'm onside and shoot. It soars past their keeper.
1-0.
I celebrate my first goal for England. Everyone piles towards me. Leah hugs me as the crowd of players disperses.
Leah: I love you.
Maddie: I love you more.
Leah: you're in for a good night after that goal.
I smile at her before going back to kick off again.
After full time it's 3-0 to us. I scored two, Meado scored the other. We are shanking hands with Sweden.
Rolfö: well played.
Maddie: thanks.
Rolfö: looked good doing it too.
She's flirting with me, I can tell.
Maddie: tha-thanks, I think.
Rolfö: if you're ever in Spain and want a tour, let me know.
With that she kisses my cheek and walks off. I look at Leah and she's not impressed. I walk over to her.
Leah: what was that?
Maddie: nothing.
Leah: didn't seem like nothing.
Maddie: babe.
Leah: what did she say?
Maddie: said if I was ever in Spain and wanted a tour then I had to let her know.
Leah: she joking?
Maddie: le, you know I didn't entertain her.
Leah: I know.
Maddie: I'm yours, you know that.
Leah: mhm, I'm gonna show you how much you're mine tonight.
I blush a little bit.
Leah: don't blush my love.
Maddie: you know i can't help it.
Leah smirks and kisses my cheek.
She walks off towards Keira and G who are both chatting away.
Rach: you good?
Maddie: yeah.
Rach: I miss you at Villa.
Maddie: I miss you too Rach.
Rach: I'm telling you now, after the Ireland game, I'm retiring from international football.
Maddie: wh-what?
Rach: it's my time Mads.
Maddie: no-no you can't.
Rach: Mads.
Maddie: NO!
I walk off. I don't say anything to anyone. Rachel has been my best friend for years. I talk to her about everything.
I go to the changing room and get showered and ready to get on the bus. Leah comes up to me before I leave.
Leah: babe? What's going on?
Maddie: nothing.
Leah: babe.
Maddie: I'm fine!
I walk off. I hate snapping at people but I'm so upset that I can't cope with it all.
I see Rachel walk up to Leah as I leave. I go straight to the bus and sit in my seat, headphones in without talking to anyone.
My eyes are closed when I feel someone sit next to me. I know it's not Leah.
Rach: I'm sorry Mads.
I look at her.
Maddie: why?
Rach: it's just my time.
Maddie: I don't want you to go.
Rach: I know.
She pulls me into a hug.
I cry a little bit.
Rach: it'll be okay.
Maddie: when will I see you?
Rach: all the time.
Maddie: promise?
Rach: promise.
I don't say anything else. We just hug whilst the bus takes us to our hotel.
Leah and I are sharing a room. I go up before she does. I get changed and get into bed before Leah walks in.
Leah: hi.
Maddie: I'm sorry for snapping.
Leah: I understand why you did, Rach told me.
Maddie: I'm going to miss her so much.
Leah: I know baby, I know.
Leah climbs into bed with me and hugs me tightly.
Leah: I love you.
Maddie: I love you more.
Leah: you played so well today, I'm so proud of you.
Maddie: so did you babe.
Leah: did I score two goals?
Maddie: you're a defender, you kept a clean sheet.
Leah: hmm that is very true.
We talk for a while before going to sleep.
It's after the Republic of Ireland game. We won. But Rach is leaving so I'm not in a good headspace. I've played with her for years, she's been my best friend for so so so long, to not have her at England camps anymore is going to be strange for me. After the game I'm hugging Rach tightly.
Rach: it's going to be okay.
Maddie: I know Rach, just going to be weird for a while.
Rach: you'll be okay. I know it. Now go storm it in the NWSL, I'll be watching every move and I'll see you in summer when you come home.
Maddie: I love you Rach.
Rach: I love you too Mads.
I hug her again before she walks off the pitch one final time.
Katie McCabe walks over to me.
Katie: hey Mads.
Maddie: hey.
I hug her.
Katie: how's America treating you?
Maddie: not as well as England does.
Katie: we can't wait for you to be back home with us.
Maddie: only a few more months.
Katie: go storm it kid, talk soon yeah?
Maddie: you know it.
I havent told Leah yet that I don't have to go back to Florida for a couple more days. She's going to be excited because she thinks I have to go back tomorrow. With everything going on I told Rehanne I needed a bit more time at home which she understood.
Leah: come on babe, let's go, I want as much time with you as possible.
Maddie: I'm coming.
She grabs my hand as we walk to the changing rooms to get ready to go home.
We get back home and Leah pushes me through the door. She starts kissing my neck.
Maddie: Leah.
Leah: mhmm.
Maddie: baby.
Leah: I'm going to miss you.
Maddie: I'm not leaving till Friday.
She snaps out of it and looks at me.
Leah: what?
Maddie: I asked Rehanne if I could have a few more days at home.
Leah: you did?
Maddie: I did.
Leah: why?
Maddie: because I want to be home right now.
She smiles widely.
Leah: I love you.
Maddie: I love you more.
Leah: my mums going to bring Bruno back tomorrow morning.
Maddie: I've missed him so much.
Leah: he's missed you.
Maddie: dare I say I've missed him more than you?
Leah: wooowwww.
Maddie: he's my baby Leah.
Leah: and I'm your fiancée.
Maddie: I know buttttt
With that Leah picks me up and throws me over her shoulder. I'm laughing whilst she takes me upstairs.
The next morning I hear our front door open. I hear dog footsteps on the floor. I shout.
Maddie: Bruno!
I hear him run upstairs and into our room.
He jumps on the bed and starts attacking me.
Maddie: hello my boy. I missed you. Did you miss me?
Leah: he did.
Maddie: aww my baby boy.
He cuddles into me tightly.
Maddie: come on, let's go downstairs.
I get out of bed and Amanda is in the kitchen.
Amanda: hello darling.
She engulfs me in a huge hug.
Maddie: how are you?
Amanda: I'm good, how are you?
Maddie: it's good to be home.
Amanda: how long are you here for?
Maddie: 3 more days, fly back Friday night.
Amanda: well, dinner at mine tomorrow night?
I look at Leah.
Leah: sounds good mum.
Amanda: brilliant, I'll see you then.
She kisses both of our cheeks before leaving.
Leah: so babe, what do you want to do today?
Maddie: I want to plan our wedding.
Leah: really?
Maddie: I don't want to wait to be your wife.
Leah: I don't want to wait to be yours. Let's plan.
Maddie: okay, a wedding planner is coming at 11.
Leah: you have got it all planned out haven't you?
Maddie: you know I do.
Leah: that's why I love you.
The wedding planner comes over at 11, as arranged. We talk through what type of wedding we want, small yet filled with everyone we love. Of course Leah wants an Arsenal theme but that was quickly scrapped.
By 4pm, we have a date, a venue, flowers, cake and everything but our outfits.
Elise leaves and Leah looks at me.
Leah: I love you.
Maddie: forever?
Leah: forever and ever.
Maddie: 16th of August baby.
Leah: I can't wait.
She kisses me softly.
The invitation designer is sending them out for us, so we don't have to worry about that.
Bruno looks at me.
Maddie: walkies?
He tilts his head and starts getting excited.
Leah: come on then, let's go.
We both get ready to take him out for a walk. This is what I've missed, the easy going family life. Just Leah and I, walking our fur baby.
I post a picture on my instagram.
@maddieowen: I've missed my fur baby🫶🏻🤍
Comments:
@leahwilliamson: not your fiancée?
^@maddieowen: sorry not sorry baby x
@gemmaowen: I've missed you💫
^@maddieowen: missed you more🫶🏻
We head home and relax for the rest of the day. My mum rings me later on whilst Leah and I are watching TV.
Louise: hey sweetheart.
Maddie: hey mum, everything okay?
Louise: are you with Leah?
Maddie: yeah why?
Louise: I need to tell you something.
Maddie: okay?
Louise: I'm in london, can I come round?
Maddie: erm yeah. Everything okay?
Louise: it will be.
Maddie: okay, see you soon, I love you.
Louise: I love you too darling, I'll be there in half an hour.
Leah: she alright?
Maddie: I don't know, she's going to be here in half an hour, she needs to talk to us both.
Leah: sounds interesting.
Maddie: yeah.
Leah: hey she'll be alright, I promise you.
Maddie: yeah I suppose.
I'm quiet for the next half an hour, mum says everything will be okay but I'm scared still. Leah's trying to take my mind off it but I can't stop overthinking.
Mum walks through the door.
Louise: hey girls.
Maddie: hi mum.
Leah: hey Louise, you want a drink?
Louise: got any wine?
Leah: Maddies in the house, of course we do.
They both chuckle.
Leah goes into the kitchen and gets my mum a glass of wine. I look at mum for a bit. I can see she's upset about something.
Maddie: tell me.
Louise: Maddie.
Maddie: no something bad has happened, so please tell me.
Louise: I went for a scan the other day.
Maddie: what type of scan?
Louise: mammogram.
I freeze up and look at her.
Maddie: okay.
Louise: I've got cancer darling.
Maddie: wh-what?
Louise: it's stage 3, it's beatable.
Maddie: can-cancer?
Louise: it'll be okay sweetheart, I promise.
Maddie: does dad know? What has he said? What have the doctors said?
Louise: dad was with me when I got the results.
Maddie: ok-okay.
Mum grabs my hands.
Louise: I'm going to be fine.
Maddie: I'm in America for the rest of the season. I can't- I can't look after you.
Louise: Mads.
Maddie: no.
I start tearing up as Leah walks back in.
She kisses the side of my head.
Maddie: you knew didn't you?
Leah: baby.
Maddie: no you knew and didn't tell me!
Leah: Maddie.
Maddie: NO! You didn't tell me!
Leah: babe it wasn't my news to tell
Maddie: when did you find out?
Leah: 3 days ago.
Maddie: 3 days! Three fucking days ago?! I was with you three days ago!
Leah: Maddie.
I walk out of the house without saying anything else. My fiancée, my future wife has lied to me for 3 days, today we planned our wedding, she wanted it quickly. I start over thinking about my mum, what if Leah wanted it quickly so my mum could be there? What if that was the plan all along?
I'm walking down the street, I cross the road when a car speeds into me. My head cracks against the road. I feel it crack.
My vision is blurry, there's no one around I don't think. I get my phone out of my pocket, I ring Leah.
Leah: babe where are you? I'll come get you.
Maddie: I- I lo-love yo-you.
Leah: Maddie, where are you? What's going on?
Maddie: a ca-car, my he-head hurts.
Leah: what do you mean a car? Maddie? Babe.
I hear her start talking to my mum. They are both rushing around getting their shoes on before I hear a car door shut.
Leah: can you put your location on?
Maddie: I- I love you.
Leah: can you try?
I turn my location on, I have no idea where I am. I put my hand to my head and see blood all over me.
Maddie: le-Leah.
Leah: yeah baby? We will be there in 2 minutes, 2 minutes babe just stay on the phone.
Maddie: I-I'm s-sorry
Leah: you have nothing to be sorry for. I love you.
Maddie: I love you.