Earned it- The weekend
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"Sometimes by acting you become the act"
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I stared at the blood on the ground. A blood, so red, so dark that I could see my own reflection in. A red, dark blood that used to run through someone's veins. A blood that gave life to someone I loved with all my life.
Blood that spilled because I caused the wound.
Blood that spilled because I took his life.
Blood that made the knife in my hand shake and blood that made me fall into the ground, my knees touching the wet and dark surface which was staining both my heart and hands. I screamed. A scream, so loud, so raw, so painful I never thought could come out of me. A scream of agony, a scream of hurt, a scream of betrayal and a scream of freedom.
A scream that held all. A scream that showed that I survived and a scream that showed that I just got destroyed.
A scream that took a life and a scream that in the same time took my half.
But was he really my half if it hurt being by his side?
But I still continued to scream, a scream so high pitched that could shatter a glass. I still continued to scream for the blood that was pouring on the floor.
I stared down at it refusing to see the face that laid in it.
And I screamed again, and this time? All the glasses shattered, and the room started getting smaller and smaller and blood started to fall onto me, blood that held memories.
And I screamed as I opened my eyes.
"Beathe in, breathe out." I whispered to myself as I kept shaking. I breathed in and closed my eyes. "It was just a dream." I smiled, trying to distract myself from the memories.
"What the fuck happened?" A concerned voice with a similar looking face appeared on the door of my, well his room.
I just stared at him wide eyed, my mouth parted, and my body shaking briefly, and I hoped that he wouldn't notice.
Okay, who am I kidding, he's a mafia don and is probably a master at profiling people as much as I am. And it wouldn't take a lot to understand I just had a nightmare.
I closed my eyes. Vulnerability was something I refused people to see, and that's why I'd rather drink myself to sleep than sleep normally.
But I have been busy, too busy to go out and have a drink. Too busy to act like I don't kill even though the fact that I do it without having any remorse should disturb me.
"Nothing. I'm okay." I said in a whisper.
A whisper said in my own voice, but that could barely pass as Clandestine's. Her voice, well mine, is strong, scary and smooth, but mixed with emotions? It's like having an ice cream in summer. Sweet but cold.
And I stilled.
This was the only person except Stella that I had used this voice after the age of 15.
This is the reason I don't let people talk to me after my nightmares. It brings me too close back. Closer than 2 years ago. It brings me closer to 15 years ago. Closer to who I was.
Closer to someone who is no longer there.
I opened my eyes and saw that the emotion that was clear on his face moments ago, was gone.
But he, unlike his expression wasn't. And it didn't look like he was planning to.
He just started walking closer, and I could do nothing except lay still.
Now that he was closer to the window, the lights outside highlighted his face.
Tired from lack of sleep, hair messy from sleeping and in a basic t-shirt and sweatpants he entered the bed.
I turned to look at him, his green eyes cold while they stared into mine.
"Are you crazy?" I questioned him raising my pitch slightly.
He shook his head and just took me by the waist, closer to him, and turned me so my back was pressed against his chest.
"Sleep." He ordered and for some reason I listened.
And for the first time I slept without taking any pills or drinking until I blacked out.
***
When I woke up, I was alone. For a moment I thought that I dreamt everything even the part where Alonzo held me until I slept.
But I was proved wrong when Alonzo stepped out of the bathroom and stared at me with no emotion, like he didn't hold me against his chest hours ago.
My heart sped. It was an unknown emotion, one I couldn't put my finger on.
"Slept well?" He questioned me.
"Yes. Thank you." I responded. He nodded and headed for the door. Before stepping out of it, he stopped.
"Since our date didn't end when it was supposed to last time, I'm talking you out again today. Dress casual. Sweatpants and a t-shirt." And he left.
My mouth was parted, my brows furrowed and I was completely confused.
Alonzo Pierce
A scream. A scream so loud that could shatter a glass. I opened my eyes, alarmed.
Did anyone enter the house? Why did they take her?
I got out of the sofa, where I had been sleeping these past few weeks because the girl that just screamed took my room. I ran up the stairs.
"Breathe in, Breathe out" I stopped outside the door listening to her little breaths. Concerned on what happened, I opened the door.
"What the fuck happened?" I questioned her, my voice filled with concern and then I saw her.
New York's lights highlighted her face. Small, straight nose, almond shaped eyes who were slightly wide at the moment for staring at me and slightly parted plumb lips. She looked a little shocked, like she didn't expect anyone to see her in this state. She briefly shook, so little that almost no one would notice.
"Nothing. I'm okay." she said in a whisper and I stilled.
A voice that matched her face. A voice so smooth that reminded me of a sea with no waves.
And I wondered, what could have possibly happened to her that she didn't use this voice or why she did scream. A scream so loud, so raw that almost sent shivers through my spine.
Her eyes closed and I got rid of the concerned emotion on my face. She opened them again, getting rid of hers.
And I decided to do the dumbest thing I have ever done in my life. Sleep in a bed with a woman who I'm not having sex with.
"Are you crazy?" Her voice raised in pitch and I shook my head. I laid beside her, her breasts under her t-shirt touching mine. I stared into her eyes.
Fucking hell.
I couldn't keep her breasts against mine or I was going crazy. I took her waist and turned her so her back could be pressed against mine. But as I was getting rid of my hands, I accidentally touched her thigh. She was sleeping in shorts. Her skin, so smooth, like silk, like a blessing to my hands.
I closed my eyes and tried to distract myself on how her skin felt.
She's annoying. Her voice is annoying. Her dresses which hug her curves are annoying.
But her skin, smooth, was distracting me from all the cons this woman had.
Her breathing steadied, and she fell asleep. I put some distance between us so she couldn't feel my hard on. And I tried to let sleep draw me in.
As the sun fell on my face I opened my eyes. Her leg was over mine, her breasts squished on my chest, her head on my forehand and her hair messy. I stared at her for a bit.
High cheekbones. Beautiful lashes. Plump lips. Small and straight nose, and little freckles that you almost couldn't notice.
She was beautiful.
What?
She was annoying.
I carefully tried to take my hand off without disturbing her sleep, and touched her leg to try to free myself from her grip. Her skin.
Focus.
When I freed myself I went straight to the shower, and opened the cold water. I titled my head back, closing my eyes.
I wanted to make her fall in love with me. I wanted to fool her.
But that scream, so raw, touched something so deep inside me that had never been touched. Concern.
But it also reminded me of when I screamed for my mother. When I found her dead.
What could have possibly happened to her to go through that dream? Through that pain? Was it her sister?
Water dripped down my abs, my hair getting washed from the clear water that couldn't wash the blood that stained my hands.
My thoughts slowly drifted, my head in a different direction. In a different feeling. A smooth one. My lips parted from just remembering her body beside mine.
Fuck. Focus.
If I go like this any longer, I'd be the one who'd fall for her and not she.
But if I got so aroused just from the feel of her thigh then she should be the same. And I opened my eyes, smiling with the new idea that went through my head.
I'm taking her somewhere.
Somewhere private.
***
Estelle Adler Camelli
"Anything?" I questioned Polina as I tapped my desk.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
"No. Nothing. Nikolai hasn't visited once." Polina whispered on the phone.
She had been reporting me on everything that had been going on in the side houses. But apparently neither Alonzo nor Nikolai had been visiting them.
"Okay. Update me if you find anything." And I closed the call. I was sat in my office located in my headquarter. It was classic, timeless, a chandelier in the ceiling, libraries behind me, pictures on the walls that were dark red. One of them was my favourite , a glass of wine spilled on the ground, exactly like blood.
It was 5'o clock in the afternoon, and Alonzo told me that we would leave at 7pm. So I took my car keys, closed my office, and started walking. Benjamin was on a mission with Marina and some others, meanwhile the new ones were still training.
"Boss!" The 14 year old girl called me. Her name was Amanda.
"Yes?" I responded to her, my posture straight as she came and hugged me.
"When will I do my first kill?" She questioned me, mimicking my posture and trying to wipe any sign of being excited off her face.
I almost smiled at her determination.
"Soon." I responded and she nodded and left to go back with the group.
I shook my head and entered the elevator. I saw myself on its mirror. A black top that hugged my figure and black pants, a red lipstick on my lips and black eyeliner on my eyes. Mascara to make my lashes appear longer and concealer to cover my freckles. They made me appear more... sweet.
I entered my car and started driving home. For some reason, I let my mind wander to last night. To the way he was holding me, to the way his abs felt against me.
For fuck's sake.
I wanted to make him fall in love with me, not fall through the process.
Even though that would be impossible. I'd never trust anyone ever again.
***
I dressed in white sweatpants and a black top. I tied my hair up in a ponytail, and applied soft make up.
Unlike Clandestine, I wanted to appear innocent, not fearless.
A text echoed in the quiet room.
Alonzo
Come downstairs. I'm waiting for you.
Going down the stairs I saw Alonzo. Tall with muscles. Tattoos. He was someone you dreamt about, not saw in real life.
He was someone, so attractive, so dangerous, that wouldn't seem to fit right in the same person. But in him? In him it fit perfectly.
He waited for me until I was beside him, and he placed his hand on my lower back. My heart fluttered.
I knew I hated attention, so why did I almost like it coming from him?
I didn't.
I smiled at him. He didn't return it. No surprise there.
We got into his car, a Lamborghini Revuelto and he started driving.
"Where are we going? It's dark already." I told him but he just kept staring at the road, his hand around the wheel, his veins clearly visible. His side profile was like someone just finished drawing it.
He was drawn by god himself. It was like he poured all into just him.
Into his body, his face, but clearly not his personality.
But that didn't matter to me, I'd make him fall in love with me. I'd make him trust me more than himself. I'd make him forget to constantly check me, as he wouldn't have the wish to. And that's why I ordered to kill Dmitri, so no one could mess with my plan.
"We're close." He responded. We were going up a hill which thank god was paved. Suddenly he stopped and I got out of the car.
The chill air of the night hit my face, and I closed my eyes, the fresh air slapping my face delicately.
"Open your eyes and look on your right." He said and I did.
My mouth parted, my head titled right and my eyes slightly opened.
"Wow." I smiled and almost coughed on air at the view. "It's..." I stopped not finding any words.
"Breathtaking?" He suggested and I nodded.
It was the view of all of New York, the lights the opposite of the dark sky. Vibrant, full of life. But up here? It was quiet. Peaceful.
"Come here." He tapped the spot beside him.
I started walking near him. I tried looking amazed for so long, acting like a little girl.
"Why did you bring me here?" I questioned, and I cursed myself in my head on why I asked him.
I wanted to make him fall in love with me, not act like I was already.
"I wanted to." He answered and turned to look at me.
I stared into his eyes. Green, piercing right through me. His hand went under my chin, tilting it up. My heart sped, my hands went to his shoulders for support, keeping myself up, steady. I breathed in, but instead of fresh air, it was his smell.
Clean, dangerous.
He touched my bottom lip with his thumb, parting my lips, and I could swear his lips almost formed a curve.
"You got really nice lips." he muttered in his cold voice, emotionless, but his actions were the opposite.
Then his hand went behind my neck and I almost pressed all my weight against it.
He came closer, his breath hitting my neck, and the desire of wanting more reached low, my nipples hardening against the soft fabric of my top.
My mouth parted in reflex as he slowly bit below my ear, and I took a breath in, as he went up and did the same with the place behind my ear which I was sensitive to, and I slowly shuddered. He teased me, but didn't leave a mark.
And he pulled away but the heat didn't as his presence got replaced by the chill air hitting my heated body.
He tilted his head right copying my movement.
I was angry, angry that he made a move before I did. Angry that it looked like I was falling into his trap and not him.
And I smiled as I leaned closer to him, kissed the place below his jaw and at the same time keeping one of my hands behind his neck.
His eyes closed and I could swear I heard him take a breath as his lips parted.
Two could play this game.
I climbed over him, my things on each of his sides, my breasts against his chest.
And then when I thought I was making him lose control, he took my hair and pushed my head back.
He watched me for a moment as I stared at him with anger.
"I love your determination, but I figured it wasn't smart to let you think you had the upper hand here." He said keeping his face above mine before he whispered in my ear. "Because you don't."
And I smiled inside.
No, I had the upper hand here. Because I knew your secret but you didn't know mine.
And I responded.
"You're right."
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I honestly can't wait to make them love each other and then hate each other again. But hate HATE.
(sorry I love a good enemies to lovers and I promise y'all will have a scene with a knife where they will want to kill each other🤭)
Well, what did you think of this chapter?
What do you think will happen next?
Don't forget to vote and comment!
See you next Sunday🫶🏻