"Come here, kid," I said, opening my arms. Carl hesitated for a moment before rushing into me. Our embrace brought me back to the day the prison fell. I squeezed him tighter than I ever had before. Not only because I missed him, but because his baby sister was no where in sight. "Let me look at you."
Carl stepped back and attempted to hide his face with his hat. I took it off before I placed my finger under his chin and raised his head. His cheek was scratched and coated with dried blood. I ran my thumb gently on the mark. There was a deep sadness and fear within his eyes. I bit my tongue from asking any invasive questions. Instead, I laid a gentle kiss on the kid's forehead.
I placed the sheriff's hat on my own head. "I think I'll keep this."
"Hey!" Carl objected as he snatched it from me. The corners of his mouth turned up.
I sighed, "Brown looks better on you anyway. Those bastards took mine."
"I know. Dad saw someone wearing it. That's how we figured out this wasn't a good place."
I looked behind Carl to see Rick talking with Sasha. He was already looking back at me. "Smart man."
Everyone else in the car was using whatever they had to make weapons. Rick had taken a quick break from sawing off pieces of wood. He had already stashed one in his boot. He gave Sasha a nod before getting right back to his task.
"Go help Michonne. We'll talk again when we're out of here, okay?" I told Carl.
"Okay."
I walked over to Rick and squatted down next to him. We hadn't talked since he'd been here. I wanted to hug him and tell him how much I missed his presence. Instead, I asked, "Need anything?"
"No. I think I got it," he said as he ran the zipper back and forth. Sweat dripped off of his curled hair. "This one's for you when I'm done."
There was a coldness in his tone which caught me off guard. This wasn't exactly the happy reunion I had in mind. But considering the circumstances, I backed off. I had been so consumed with ideas of him alive or dead that I never stopped to think that maybe I didn't occupy that same space in his head. Besides, I had no idea what he went through in the two weeks we were separated. He could have changed completely in that time.
"Okay, let me know when you're ready."
Rick didn't respond as I walked away. I leaned up against the wall by Rosita.
"All right, got four of them pricks coming our way," Daryl informed everyone.
Rick stood and went over to the door. "Ya'll know what to do. Go for their eyes first. Then their throats."
A voice outside said, "Put your backs to the walls on either side of the car. Now!"
Michonne and I put ourselves in front of Carl. Rick hadn't finished getting my weapon for me, so I held up my fists instead. The man nodded quickly to his son.
A second passed before a hatch on the top of the train car opened up. From it dropped a small canister.
"Move!" shouted Abraham.
Suddenly, it exploded and filled our small cage with a cloud of thick smoke. My eyes and lungs burned as I attempted to figure out what was going on. I felt Rick dive into me. He grabbed Carl and I before shoving us deeper into the car. Everyone started coughing.
Someone opened the door and walked in.
I gripped onto the kid so I wouldn't lose him but I was starting to become lightheaded. My legs weakened so I dragged him down with me. I used whatever strength I had to drape my body over him. If they were killing us now, I was going to do whatever it took to keep Carl alive. Even if that meant using myself as a shield.
I heard people being dragged outside but I couldn't tell who. Luckily, with the door open, the smoke began to clear. But just as quickly as they came, they were gone.
I slowly stood up as new oxygen replenished my system. Carl stumbled a bit so I let him hold on to me.
"What happened?" I asked with a raspy voice.
"Glenn's gone!" Maggie said in a panic.
"Bob too," added Sasha. "And Daryl."
Carl peeked out from behind me. "Where's my dad?"
My eyes darted around to each person in the car. None of them were Rick Grimes. "He's not here," I told him.
Why they had taken those four, I didn't know. Nothing that we saw while getting trapped in here gave me any indication of what they wanted with us. The only thing I could assume was the worst; the reaper had dragged them away.
Rick's zipper glimmered in the light. I kneeled down and continued sawing off the wooden spike. No words came from my mouth, but I could feel eyes on me. I ignored them and focused in on the task. If I didn't do this, I would imagine every scenario that could happen to the men I cared about.
I got about halfway done when a large blast filled my ears.
"What was that?" Maggie questioned.
"I would say by the sound of it, something exploded in our vicinity," said Eugene.
"Yeah, no shit," Rosita jeered. She placed her cheek up against the metal in an attempt to see what was happening.
Then gunfire began. Multiple automatic weapons were fired.
I began sawing the wood at double time now.
Abraham banged his fits up against the door. "What the hell is going on?"
"Someone hit them," Michonne said.
"Maybe our people got free," Sasha added with a hint of hope in her voice.
Although I wouldn't consider the chaos outside a good thing on a normal day, it was now. It meant that the men had somehow freed themselves and were able to attack, or someone else created a distraction for them. However, I still kept in mind that they could already be dead and either option was wrong.
"Excuse me," Eugene blurted as he shoved his way past Tara and Sasha. He kneeled down by the door.
"What the hell are you doing?" Rosita asked.
"I might be able to use this shell to compromise the door. From the sound of things, there may not be anybody left to open it"
Even though his perspective was grim, I did agree with it to a point. But I didn't say this. I couldn't add to the overshadowing thought that our friends were gone.
"Eugene, I'm sorry, but shut up," scoffed Tara.
"Hey," Carl started, "my dad's gonna be back. They all are."
"They are," agreed Maggie. "And we need to get ready to fight our way out with 'em when they do."
I got the spike cut down enough to where I could pry it off the beam. It cracked and splintered when I did. The wood was slim and sharp enough for me to use as a knife.
All of us worked on out weapons, waiting in anticipation for the door to open. There was even more gunfire than there was previously. The groans and snarls of walkers surrounded the train car.
"When we get out, you stay right next to me or your dad, okay?" I told Carl. "No matter what."
"Yeah, I will," he responded, letting out an anxious breath.
I held up my pinky. "Promise?"
Carl's mouth stretched into a thin smile before he wrapped his pinky around mine. "Promise."
After Eugene was done explaining to us how he knew what could save the world, there was a banging on the door.
Carl scrambled to his feet and got behind me. I held onto him with one hand and the spike with the other. The door slid open to reveal Rick Grimes. My heartbeat slowed just a little with the knowledge that he was still alive. I looked beyond him to see that smoke and walkers had filled the compound. Bob, Glenn, and Daryl kept the monsters at bay.
"Come on!" Rick shouted. "Fight to the fence!" He put up his gun and shot at the walkers.
I ran with Carl to his father. Rick held his face for a moment and nodded. All of us slashed, shot, and stabbed the obstacles in front of us. Carl kept his promise because he was basically attached to my hip. I took down a walker while Carl held onto another. Blood splattered as I took the wooden blade out of one skull and into the other. We rushed to the fence as a few people were already going over. I helped Carl before I got myself on the other side.
We ran until we got clear of the destruction and into the woods.
"This way," Daryl said.
I followed his and Rick's lead through the trees. They stopped and began digging through the dirt.
"The hell are we still around here for?" Abraham questioned.
"Guns. Some supplies," Rick responded.
Smart man.
"Go along the fences. Use the rifles. Take out the rest of 'em."
Bob stepped forward. "What?"
"They don't get to live."
"Rick, we got out it's over," Glenn said in a frustrated tone.
"It's not over until they're dead."
Rosita shook her head. "The hell it isn't. That place is on fire. Full of walkers."
I crossed my arms and furrowed my eyebrows. "No," I said. "Rick's right. The Governor came back. Those assholes who did this to me came back." I pointed to the scar on my face. Everyone around me seemed to freeze in time when I revealed that information. I hadn't told anyone what happened to me while I was alone yet. "The point is, they could come back too. I'd rather not take that chance."
Rick thanked me with a nod.
"That's not going to happen," Glenn told me. "We'll get far away from here. They won't be able to find us again. And that's even if any of them survive. Which they won't."
Maggie looked between Rick and I. "The fences are down. No way any of them will have a chance to regroup."
It was clear Rick and I were outnumbered. Before either of us had the chance to make another counterargument, Daryl sprinted behind us. I turned to see him embracing Carol.
The moment behind the glass where Rick told me about what she had done flashed in my mind. But, I didn't really care now. She was alive and here with us again. That's what mattered.
Rick approached her before asking, "Did you do that?"
Carol rolled her lips and nodded. Rick then hugged her.
I let out a short laugh. She had saved us all.
"You have to come with me," Carol told him.
She led us through the forest and up to a run-down cabin. Exiting it was Tyreese holding Judith in his arms. Rick, Carl, and Sasha sprinted over.
I couldn't contain my grin as Rick kissed his child. His hard exterior instantly melted when she grabbed his beard.
Rick had decided to leave instead of go back to kill the rest of the people at Terminus. I felt angry at him for giving up so easily. I know someone would have stayed behind to protect Judith and Carl. Even if it was just us two heading there, I would have gone. I am aware he was just reunited with his daughter who he thought was gone, but this would have guaranteed her safety in the long run.
If Helen could find me again after all that time, so could they. The world wasn't as big as it seemed to be. Even if it was months from now, they could stumble upon us. After what we did, I doubt they would hesitate to kill us.
Rick tried walking next to me, but I sped forward and went in stride with Michonne. He hadn't said so much as a hello to me since we came together again. That and the fact that I defended him without a thanks or action toward the plan made me not want to be near him. It was my turn to be cold.