I walk back slowly , I look around and the lawn is all cleaned up, no signs of any party somehow been left behind, it makes me think if it was really won's birthday or if I was just imagining it all. All the fights and argument today I had with tae. I walk inside our mansion and maids runs towards me to get my bag and my coat.
I hand over her the bag and looks at her, Martha was the first ever maid we assigned since we bought this new dream mansion. She knows us so well, she signs up there towards our room and I get the hint, I nod and walk towards our shared room.
Taehyung, my husband is up there .
I look at the pink flower bouquet and chocolates I bought for tae, I know very well he must be angry, too annoyed but I will make it upto him, like always.
"Tae? You inside?" I knock the door and there's no noise, he says nothing.
I knock again and then push the door open.
I see him then.
Sitting on our bed, staring at his palm. His eyes look swollen and his hair disheveled. As if he had grabbed them harshly. I wince at the sore sight.
"Tae? Baby what happened?"
I Panick a bit with how calm he looks. We had fights many times in past 12 years but never in once I have saw him like this, at threshold of breaking down. And something knocks my gut when I realise its me who have been reason behind his sorrow.
But I will make it up to him, no?
"Tae?" I walk towards him and sit on my knees in front of him. I caress his face, tears still on his cheeks. I gulp.
"Tae look what I got for you" I place flowers and chocolates on his lap.
"Where is wonie? I will go see him in a minute" I attempt to speak but his hoarce voice shudders me.
Never in all these years, I have heard him like this.
Another crack I feel inside me.
"He is not home. He went at Jin hyung's house"
Oh?
I sit back.
I see fresh tears stream down his face on his palm where he has been looking.
"Tae, I am sorry . I really wanted to attend but the emergency meeting came up and—"
"Makes me think if anything happens to me or wonie, will you choose us or your emergency meeting"
My heart shatters and I feel intense buzzing inside my head.
"I will choose you and wonie tae, what are you saying. How can you even say it. You know it I will choose you"
He scoffs
"Thats what it is Jungkook, I don't know if you will choose us, I am not sure anymore if you will choose us. Because all these past years you haven't chosen us at all"
Silence fell between us, punctuated by my rapid breaths and the deafening ticks of the clock in the corner. Any response I might've had was crushed beneath the weight of his tears.
I have had endured everything in past few years, but looking at him crying made me weak. He chokes on his tears and I see him patting his chest because I have broken him right there.
"Tae, I am sorry. I agree what I did today was unforgivable, but please listen to me. Tae all this we got, big mansion, big cars all money is because of the work I have been busy with. I cannot be not there when my company needs me tae"
He looks up at me, his eyes blood shot. He opens up his mouth, but shuts it again.
He breathes
"And what about us? Do we not need you??? Are we not your responsibility????? What good is any of your money and big house and car if I never see you??? We have been in worse situations jungkook, were we ate just once and slept on fucking bus stations but still we were content, because we had each other back then"
"Tae you still have me. I still love you."
He furiously snaps his head.
"Jungwon" he sobs loud and I feel shaken, what about Jungwon?
"Jungwon's teacher called me few weeks ago in school. They said he needs parental guidance because he is been missing classes and been feeling lonely . I called you that day, and you never picked up only for me to know from your secretary you went busan for a day and told her to let me know. I was so scared for my child jungkook and his father was nowhere for him and his husband" taehyung cover his face as he cries hysterically.
"I am your damn Husband, and I had no idea when you fly overseas unless your secretary lets me know "
I just stay still.
"Today Jungwon asked if you don't love us anymore and if you don't want him anymore."
No
No
This can't be happening.
"I was not able to answer him, because I felt the same. I was unsure if you still wanted us Jungkook. We canceled his birthday party, he won't cut cake because he hasn't seen his father since past 3 weeks in row. He said he wanted to celebrate his birthday so atleast then he would see you"
why was my tie so damned tight? I couldn't breathe properly. I reached up to loosen it, but my fingers found nothing except damp cotton. No tie, only a vise around my neck and a fist strangling my lungs.
"Tae , I had no idea you were going through this. You never said anything until now.
"I should've." Tae looked away. "That was my fault. I kept it all to myself when I should've told you how I was feeling. It's not just about today or canceled dates. It's not even about you forgetting our anniversary and dinners. It's about what missing them represents."
His eyes met mine again, and my heart twisted at the hurt I saw in them. Had I really been so blind I'd missed how unhappy he'd been all this time?"
"We are not your first priority."
"Tae, you know thats not true"
He shakes his head
"No I don't know it anymore"
"I cannot smile and let go off all those nights and parties I have made excuses for you to my friends Jungkook. Its embarrassing. And you cannot make me forget the hurt I went through all those times when my friends were busy dancing and making memories with there husbands while me and my son sat at the corner wishing for you to be there for us"
My son
Every syllable chipped away at the composure I'd spent a decade constructing. An army of emotions stormed through me—anger, shame, and a fierce desperation that I hadn't felt since I was a teenager fighting to get out of my godforsaken hometown. I wasn't supposed to feel any of those things anymore, dammit.
I was a goddamn CEO, not a helpless boy with no family and no money to his name. But when faced with the prospect of losing my husband my tae...
Panic seized my chest.
"Tae, I am sorry. I will do anything you ask me too I promise!! Please don't cry"
He stares at me broken . Then he takes my palm and sobs
"Jungkook I love you and I will continue to love you forever, but for all these years, I have lost so much of myself in making you that I no longer recognise myself. We are holding onto something that doesn't exists between us anymore"
I forrow my brows, my heart beating too loudly
He places his wedding ring on my palm which he has been holding all this while.
"I feel its for better that we both part ways for a while."
The words swirled around us like a cloud of poisonous fumes.
Separating was simply impossible. It was something that happened to other people, not to us.
Not to me and my Taehyung.
We have been married for last 12 years . This won't happen to us.
I would not let that happen.
"You think we will be happy like that????you and me??? Tae what are you saying??? Divorce is a big thing We can sit and talk tae. You want me to give you guys time?? Let's go on vacation??? For a week? For a month??? Please tae. Divorce is not an option"
He shakes his head again
"I won't be giving you divorce just now Jungkook. I said we need to part ways to think. Let's stay away for a while and then decide. It won't be that bad. You have habit of not seeing us for months anyways, it won't be difficult for you"
"Tae please—"
He holds his hand on my chest
"Jungkook if you have ever loved me, please let me go. I am scared I will end up hating you and myself if I stay here any further"
His Ring on my palm burn holes.
I stand up and sit beside him on bed.
"Tae all I can say is, I have loved you and wonie beyond anything. I would choose you guys every single time. It might have not felt like I was choosing you both, but I was trying to build a safe future for both of you. I agree while doing this I have been too greedy but for me it's just you both. I love you guys so much—"
And before I could say anything he stood up , his bag already packed near the door. I never noticed it.
He one last time looked back at me and then he left.
He left me
My tae he left me .
__________________________________
CONTD..
Here's part 2!!!!!!