Sadah
"You should be the one laying down here.", I tell my anxious husband who is hovering over the doctors ad nurses ready to slit their throats by his face expression since they are taking so long." Shut up.",he says to me but his sfcae shows he is dying with concern.Concern for whom?Me?For what?A cursed bride?A bride who cannot give me wealth,happiness and now even took his own hospital bed.
He looks cute in that hospital gown by the way.I look at my cute husband having nwohere else to look since I feel like I am literally peeing nonstop and my stomach is growling with pain.It feels weird having one doctor looking at your vagina while three nurses hovers around which could be a period too.
I look at them.surprised as a wardboy wheels a Altrasound tech in. More people...great!"I am not liking all these people.",I said as another doctor joins in.
"You might be dead if you people starts living this room.",the male doctor says and I realize he was the older doctor earlier who was checking Aaron's wound.He is a middle aged doctor with a beard and grey hair on top of his head with spectacles on his eyes.
" What is going on Grayson?",Aaron asks the doctor."I would really love it if you shut the doors.",I tell at the nurses and she quickly closes it.
"She is having a vaginal bleed.Her vitals are going down due to a loss of blood and....we have to remove the fetus by surgery.", The female doctor tells the male doctor.
" What!What do you mean?",Aaron snaps at them. My world comes crashing down within seconds.I don't know how to feel and my not feeling anything scares me.My heart suddenly feels so hollow.I wnat to throw up so badly.
"It means she was pregnant.", Grayson tells Aaron." Was?",Aaron's voice shakes as he says so.His hold on my hand tightns, mine only loosens."She is miscarrying.We have to remove the fetus or else it might cause infection.",
Grayson says to Aaron worry laced in his tone.
They talk back and forth more.I feel numb...their words don't even reach my ears. I feel so numb.I am rushed inside a operation room.Within an hour I feel hands pulling down something inside me, something attached to my body. It's so painful...physically and mentally.
The small curled up limbs is carried by the nurse to a small steel plate.My heart skips a beat seeing it's small hands,small bump on a round alike tisse similiar to a nose,the two red dots alike eyes, a long cord still attached to it.
Within few minutes I am cleaned down there,rolled out on a wheelchair to the place to change into fresh clothes.Which clothes?My clothes are soaked in blood."Change into your clothes.Call me if you need me.",the nurse patts my shoulder.I look up to find a partition curtain and look down to find fresh clothes laid down.
My husband has it all planned out, doesn't he?I wear the lose yellow maxi dress.I wear the fresh undewear that smells like home.I hear Aaron's voice outside.I walk out of the curtain and find him talking wuth the lady doctor.
"I told you to wait for me.", the nurse tries to help me.I don't need help.I push her hand off me.Aaron's eyes snaps to me.He is now in a black button up shirt and beige pants.He still has that stupid beard,that stupid worried look.
" Sadah-",he rushes towards me.I hold up my hand to stop him.I walk up beside him and sit beside him."What caused it?The miscarriage?",I ask the doctor. She looks slightky taken back hearing my normal voice void of any emotion. I am surprised too.
"It could be...stress,medication,something in your food.", she tells me.
Aaron
" I..I took birth control pills nearly a month ago?Can it cause it?Or painkillers?",Sadah asks curiously.I try to hold her hand,she slips her hand off mine.My chest tightens seeing her unresponsive and cold face.The doctor looks at me signalling me it is not good."Sadah,I think we should talk later.We should -",Sadah cuts me off asking the doctor more questions.
"I literally ate nothing unusal. The bleeding started like two days ago.I ate nothing but normal food, salads and etc.
And I don't even take painkillers now.", Sadah says.Her face helpless and disshelved trying to justify the loss trying to claw whatever mistake she made, she thinks she made.
"It could be stress. Where you bleeding heavily these past two days?", the doctor asks her.She denies."No,just light bleeding.I never have heavy bleeding anyway.", Sadah says quickly." Maybe, we should talk about this later.You need rest.",I remind her, signalling the doctor with my eyes to shut it right here before Sadah compeletly freaks out.
"No!I am not leaving!I need answers!
Tell me what can cause it!", Sadah demands angrily. Her eyes balzing with rage and hurt.
" Well,Sadah you showed sign of early vaginal bleed.The miscarriage must have started this morning or during noon,I guess.",the doctor tells her.
"Yes!That could be it!I felt this sharp pain during lunch but...but what caused it?", she asks desoerately." Sadah,enough!",I tell her sternly.
"Why do you keep interrupting me!Don't you feel anything?Are you heartless like me!", Sadah's voice raises with every words she speak, her eyes blurring with unshead tears.
" A....ball of limbs made out of our blood.Your blood and mine was living inside me.It could have lived but now it's nothing but hospital trash!
Yet I feel nothing!I feel nothing inside me how you be this heartless too!The child...the fetus didn't you care about it?Do you also feel numb and heartless like me!
My blood,the baby's blood, everything...everything was gushing out of me. My body is so fucking ruined it cannot even hold a fucking child!Oh god!",Sadah looks down her eyes gritting covering her face with her hands as her shoulders shake uncontrollablely.
I wrap my arms around my naive little wife."No!Don't touch me!Get away from me!",Sadah pushes me off.
"Mrs.Kingstone I get that it's hard. But the fetus wouldn't be able to grow properly anyway.
You have various vitamin deficiencies and a high percentage of passing genetic diseases.Your body isn't prepeared to grow a child.
You are still so young.You can try again later.", the doctor tries to console her folding her hands in her professional mannerism.
Sadah's jaw tightens and she gets up the chair storming right outside."Sadah.", I walk behind her. Sadah rushes through the hallway aimlessly.
" Sadah,wait!",I catch up to her and hold her hand."Don't touch me,please. Don't.My skin is crawling wth millions of insects. It is... crawling and my head is ringing.Can you please just...just leave me alone for a second of my life!
Can anyone fucking leave me alone!It is...tiring, it hurts.It really hurts!Please,let me go!",Sadah whimpers.
"Sadah.", I call out softly." No,no.Just...just.. let me go.Please.",she yanks wrist frm me and run down the stairs.I look at Trevkur who is behind me and signal him to follow her.He quickly goes into action.
My phone rings in my pocket."Victor wants to meet you tonight.",Tristan informs me."Where?",I rub my temple.I have a dead baby on a box,a wife who is losing her sanity and two bullets in my stomach,one in my chest.But the plan must go on.It matters more than me.
"At your house.", I curse. That fucker." Oh and he requested Sadah's presence.Sorry,ordered.He won't attend if Sadah is not there.",Tristan says to me."Are you fucking kidding me!",I snap at him.
Tristan chuckles in amusment."Yes.Can you imagine that?Our Sadah impressed him.",he says to me amused.
"Tristan, Sadah was pregnant.The doctors removed the fetus just an hour ago and I don't even know where she is.
How am I supposed to host a dinner at my house tonight?", I let out. My voice helpless and shaky.
The line goes quite for a moment.He lets out a shaky breath." I am coming.",he cuts the call before I can say anything further.
I call the next person who hopefully knows how to handle everything because I don't.
Sadah
I sit on the road looking at the roads going around.I hug my knees looking at the lonely road.The same type road where everything started.Where his father hit me.
"You know...you are like a shadow to me.", I turn to Trevour who is sitting in the same position as me. He looks taken back." That is my job.",he says to me.
"How many kids do you have Trevour?", I ask him. " None,ma'am.",he says stiffly."Oh.Good.",I said sighing.A nearly fourty year old is childless and I am a mom to a dead baby at the age of seventeen.
"You know you would be a teen mom if your baby had survived.
School,baby,husband,family. Wouldn't it be a hassle?", he asks me curiosly.He always wears his shades. It's hard to understand his expression.
" I don't know.I guess we will never know.",I sigh, my heart aching to hold someone."Trevour,can youd rive me to a walmart?",I ask him. He is on his feet instantly.
By the time we are in the car driving aimlessly I have a teddy as big as mije and hugging it tightly. "Where do you want to go,ma'am?", Trevour asks me.
I stay quite." I know your master already orderd you something,Trevour.",I sigh holding my softie.
He goes quite and drives us home.I wince as I get out of the car feeling myself slightly burning up.Trevour helps me climb up the stairs."Yes,yes. I don't want a single thing out of place. I am telling you for the tenth time,yes!",Aaron growls at thephone pacing back and forth.
Looking sharp and classy with his beard now shaven off,his jet black hair gelled and wearing a navy blue suit with a sapphire pin.I don't care. I don't have the engery to act as if nothing happened. I just don't.I am not him.
I grab my softie and drag it with me, his feets dangels on the floor as I walk up the stairs."Baby,we have guests coming over in an hour.",Aaron tells me once I am in the room.
"Great.", I mutter dryly throwing the softie on the bed and laying down on it." Your dress is in the closet.",he says softly trailing a finger down my back.
"You are free to entertain your guests. I am not.", I sigh burying my face on the crook my the teddie's neck.
"Sadah.", he calls out softly holding my hand.I look away as he kneels beside me.He runs his hand on my head affectionately while I hide my tears. "Can we talk?", he asks me.
" No.",I gulp the lump in my throat."Baby,please talk with me.",he chokes on his tears. His face burries in my neck."I know I am not supposed to feel sad.
I know I am a teenager and that we never discussed about...pregency and stuff. But I am really sad, Aaron.
And I know you are obviously busy wearing that stupid suit and boots.But I cannot help it.It is physically hurting me.",I choke out on my tears and turn to him.He is crying like a baby, too.
"You should go now.", I gently push him sniffling and sit up." I am really overreacting.You should probably leave me alone.",I push him away.
"Yes,Aaron.You can leave now.There is guest downstairs.I am here with her.", mom walks inside and I quickly wipe my tears.Aaron looks at me worriedly but leaves the room to join his 'guests'.
Mom places her hand on my forhead."Are you in pain?", mom ssks me calmly and her tone tells me she knows something is up.I shake my head muttering 'no'."Are you bleeding?", I look at her. " I am your mother but I am not as stupid as you.I never left the hospital with that stupid bodyguard of yours.I saw everything.And you, my love is one of the strongest woman I know.",she brushes my hair out of my face with tenderance in her eyes and her eyes filled with sorrow and unshead tears.
"And the stupidest too.How could you even think of hiding it from me.",she adds in and I burst into tear hugging her.
" It was this tiny you know.With little limbs and...two dot eyes.It looked like those... those pictuers in my biology book.
But it came out of me.The baby, it came out of me with this cord and...mom,it was horrifying to see.
Yet I didn't cry. I felt nothing but an emptiness inside of me.It's so many emotions, so much going inside my body and inside of..... me.I feel so trapped.I don't know what to fucking do!",I scream out in frustration.
Suddenly it's like a switch that goes off on me and I quickly straihgten up."I am overreacting.I am just getting sympathy. God,I need to get dressed,Aaron has guests!",I rush towards the bathroom while mom calls after me.