Having a dinner alone never sounded so bad for Y/n until what he had recently. Sitting alone in the dinner table without another chair next or beside him, never felt so lonely to him. He put a spoonful rice towards his mouth while daydreaming about Nerissa. The spoon even had been inside his mouth since Y/n stayed still, couldn't get Nerissa out of his mind.
He even imagined Nerissa ate together with him, just like a normal married couple should be.
It would be a way out of his boring life, getting a partner so your lonely day would be gone forever.
But the harsh reality kicked in.
Instead of getting a normal love like everyone should have, but he was different from the others. He guessed that his first love would hate him one day. And maybe he should wait until the day had come. At first, he wanted to forget her as soon as possible and moved on, but it was not as easy as it sounded.
Especially the image of Nerissa in his mind was completely different from the other Cover's teachers, as if she wasn't the teacher from that school.
Not to mention how nice and polite she sounded, making Y/n felt something he had never had, making him felt special, as if she wanted to talk with him.
It should be much easier for him to abandon the love in his heart if Nerissa wasn't so nice. People said hating someone was the only option to forget one another.
But for him, the memory he had of her was so clear that he didn't even want to hate on her. No, he couldn't hate her.
The people who was nice to him could be counted by his fingers, that was the reason why he couldn't forget her in the slightest. But he was sure, his feelings would sway each day. It was only a love in the first sight, after all.
He was preparing for his bed and after he did, he slowly put his body on top of it and closed his eyes. He didn't forget to pull his blanket to cover his body and at the same time he suddenly thought about someone with a sigh,
"I wonder if I married to her, her hug would be as warm as this blanket, or maybe even warmer" His voice became softer as he fell asleep right after saying the words.
In the next day, other teachers had suspicion of Y/n. After all, he was smiling all day making even the students were scared to death. They thought it was Y/n's time to torture all of them.
But Misa, one of his best f-, no... one of the few people who understand how Y/n's brain worked, knew that it was something was happening.
"Something happened, right?" Misa supported her chin with both of her hands and looked at Y/n affectionately. No, it was not because she was in love with him, but because she cared about him like a little brother.
She knew that if Y/n was pissed his hand was clenching. If he was upset, his nose was scrunching, and if he was smiling with her eyes fully opened, that meant he had a nightmare and if he was smiling with his eyes half-closed, calmly like that, Misa knew that something good happened.
"Oh, it is you Misa."
"Tell me, tell me, did something happen? You smile quite a lot today" Misa let out a smile to show him that not only him that was smiling or thing would be awkward.
Y/n knew and acknowledge her that she was someone who easy to engage conversation with other people.
To be honest, those kind of people were the one he hated the most, knowing slowly but surely they would pry other's privacy.
But Misa was different for him. Y/n knew that she was good at keeping a secret or not to pry his privacy.
Y/n guessed that was because Misa was good at reading other people's reaction. She knew when she would stop bring the topic, or when she would talk much about it.
"Well, something did happen." said Y/n.
With a chuckle Misa asked him, "Do you want to tell me? Or you do not?"
Y/n knew that he couldn't refuse if Misa was so polite like that. But at the same time he also didn't feel uncomfortable tell a story to Misa,
"Hm, Misa. What do you think of love at the first sight?"
Not in a single time Misa would think Y/n brought up this topic by himself. Misa thought Y/n was not a type of people who would talk about love with other people, that was why she had never asked him about it or Y/n would be annoyed.
"Are you talking about yourself or another people? I need context" Misa smiled.
Y/n knew it, talked about it with Misa was the right choice, she didn't even got excited the moment Y/n brought up about love. If he had ever asked it to another people, they would go into havoc.
"Myself" He wasted no time by answering it.
"I see, to be honest. I thought you won't have any interest in love at all, Y/n."
"It was unexpected event for me either." Y/n answered it softly.
"So, how did you meet her?"
"In convenience store, and when I looked at her, I had never seen someone that beautiful before."
"Not even me?" Misa chuckled.
It was true that Misa was the most beautiful teacher that even all the students and teachers admire, but in Y/n's eyes Misa was not his type. He still found her beautiful, but the feeling did not lead him until falling in love.
"I do... find you-"
"I am just joking, Y/n. So, how do you know that you love her in the first sight?"
"Eh? Um, by her face?"
"Only that?"
"I... guess?"
Misa then turned her face away, she was wondering about something which let Y/n felt a little confused.
"I thought you are not the type who fall in love with only by looks. Is your story not yet finished?"
Actually yes, his story was not finished but he was kind of afraid that Misa would know the story that Nerissa was from the Cover school. If she found out about that, Y/n wondered how would that end up.
"She is also polite to me and... I dont know how to explain it."
"I see, I understood that feeling. Maybe it is too sudden for you too, right?"
Y/n nodded.
The ball rang out, a sign for the teacher needed to get ready as their break time was over. Misa stood up, took some of her belong and tidied it up. She looked busy while Y/n was still sitting on his chair.
But still, Misa managed to still talk to Y/n and gave him advice, which maybe he needed.
"Take it slowly Y/n, it is not like you want to be with her yet, right? Sometimes you need to sort everything out first before taking an action, just like now."
"Like now? You mean my feelings for her?"
"No, what I meant you need to sort your things out and prepare to go to work." Misa smiled.
Panickingly, Y/n rushed to prepare his belongings making some of them fell to the floor. "Crap, I forgot"
With a chuckle, Misa was about to leave the room, "Ah now that reminds me... That woman you fall in love with, has no boyfriend, right?"
Hearing those words, Y/n's pupils started to dilate. How arrogant is he, not caring about the other parties included. Only thinking about him and his feelings, without thinking if the person he was in love with could already have a boyfriend.
Just after hearing those words, Y/n started to daydream. In his class, he couldn't teach properly making some of the students even more scared. Just after he was smiling the entire day, he suddenly felt down and didn't show his smile again.
"M-Maybe this is really our time to die."
"NO! I don't have kids yet"
Not only in class, Y/n's thought was still faraway from the earth. Even Misa was regretting the choice for saying that words to him.
"What happened to him?" Asked Juni, one of Y/n's acquintance.
"You can ignore it" Misa answered with a shaky voice.
Misa wanted to apologize to Y/n, but it looked like he wouldn't hear any words that came out of her. So, she wanted to wait until the moment suited for both side.
In his way home, Y/n was walking with a sway even some of the strangers on the street mistaking him as a zombie.
The words from Misa was still echoing inside Y/n's mind. He couldn't even get it out of him.
At first, he needed a reason to forget Nerissa and he couldn't since Nerissa was a nice woman, but when he had a reason to do it now, he was hesitating. What a loser.
Just like yesterday, he decided to to go convenience store to buy some drinks, to make him forget what Misa said to him.
"Or instead of forget what Misa said, I can just forget Nerissa instead."
But one couldn't resist destiny. Because if you were fated to meet with each other, no matter what you would do.
"Y/n, we meet again." A soft voice was heard as he entered the store.
Y/n thought he would never meet her again, he thought he met her yesterday was just a coincidence since Jean lived nearby too.
"Ah, Nerissa. Are you by yourself?"
"Well, Jean said he needed to go first. And I needed the chili from yesterday~"
Y/n remembered it. Of course he did, that was the time Nerissa talked to him, after all. 'Now to think about it, the chili was out of stock yesterday' thought Y/n.
"I see, do you get some?"
"I do~" Nerissa showed Y/n a bag plastic of chilis. "What about Y/n? Do you come here to get chili too?"
"Uh, um no. I just come to get some beer."
Nerissa then smiled to him, "I see, dont drink too much, okay? It is not good for your health."
The words sounded like a concern, but was she really concerned about Y/n?
Y/n who was oroginally came for the beer, suddenly changed his mind. Instead of getting beer, he grabbed some coffees and went directly toward the cashier.
He didn't know why he should hear Nerissa words, maybe deep in his heart he just wanted to be the person who Nerissa wanted someone to be. But he forgot, Nerissa and him would never be able to be together.
"Good work for today" Y/n didn't expect Nerissa would still be there, she then looked at the things Y/n bought from the store with a wrinkle on her face "Eh? Didn't you just say you want to buy beer?"
Looking away with embarrassment, Y/n answered, "Maybe tomorrow. Suddenly I wanted to drink coffee because I need to stay up late for today"
Nerissa smiled though Y/n couldn't see her, but he knew that she was trying to tease Y/n, her voice said it all, "Heee, are you sure about that? Well, if you say soo~"
Y/n then turned his body to look at Nerissa, "And Nerissa? Are you waiting for someone?"
"Why do you ask me?"
"I mean, you are waiting outside the store. I thought you were waiting for someone." And not to mention, Y/n's mind still filled with what Misa said about Nerissa and her relationship. If he asked about it directly, he was worried that Nerissa would find him annoying by prying into her life.
"Hmm, I guess I do waiting for someone." Nerissa looked up with her index finger touching her lips indicating she was thinking about something.
On the other hand, Y/n who just heard the answer felt his heart getting stabbed. It was expected, but he still didn't prepare for it and didn't know it would be hurt that much. But his big upset suddenly broke down as he looked at Nerissa index finger was pointing at him directly,
"I was waiting for Y/n" She let out a big smile.'
The tightness feeling in Y/n's chest gone in an instant. Not only by her words, but because of her smile, her face, and also her presence made the upset feelings turned into a soft and comfortable one.
"Why would you wait for me?"
"Well, we are now friends, aren't we? We can just talk and spend time together, just like what I did with Jean"
Friends. It didn't sound so bad. Every relationship always began with a friendship, though it wasn't guaranteed. Friendship could go deeper, to become even closer or turned into a estrangement in relationships.
But present is present.
Y/n didn't want think anything else except that.
"Friends, huh? Did you even remember what Jean said to you yesterday?"
"I did, duh. But who I become closer with is nothing to do with Jean. I choose what I feel is right. And I think, you pass the criteria"
With a chuckle, Y/n answered. "Pass the criteria, huh? What am I? A swimming pool rules? No one under 160 cm should go int-"
"Not like that, Y/n" Nerissa replied it with a laugh.
He was wondering if Nerissa felt the comfortable atmosphere around her too when she was with Y/n or not. But that was not his problem, he would just be himself, and the feeling of another person was not his concern.
And only one for sure, he really had feelings for her.
Y/n then turned around with a little smile on his face. He knew that it was a long time since the last time he smiled sincerely, "So, let's go. I will send you home. But we need to be careful to not get caught by your people."
Nerissa happily walked beside Y/n and smiled too, "Why is that? Like i said,"
"I know about you, but not the other people. You can't change something just because you are different, right?"
Y/n's eyes had a soft look but still there was seriousness in it that made Nerissa understood the assignment, "Alright, alright."
There were crowds around the city, but the first five minutes for Y/n and Nerissa's world was still filled by silence. None of them was initiating the conversation.
But Y/n broke the ice by asking Nerissa, "Ah, is this your way to your home? I forgot to ask."
Nerissa startled a little, "Ah... Yes, yes don't worry. I just moved to the apartment nearby, it was like 4 intersections from here."
"I see," Y/n didn't hear it, because his mind was still blank because the moment he asked the question, he was mesmerized by the beauty of Nerissa. "And? How do you find to live in this small city?"
"Small? My city back then was even smaller," Nerissa answered. "We even have to walk a lot to go to the nearby store and you have to own a bicycle! That is far better!"
Time passed so quickly with them talking to each other, the topic was going on and on without stopping as if they were really destined to be together.
Just like that, Y/n knew that he would even fall in love deeper. There was no changing it anymore.
People said, love grew out of habit. The closer you were with someone, the deeper your love will be.
Y/n knew if he would do this together everyday with Nerissa, 'No chance. She is teaching in Cover school. I shouldn't... I dont want to...'
"And... What about you, Y/n? Do you think you love your job?" asked Nerissa.
"Yeah, I love" With sincerety on his eyes, he looked at Nerissa.
"Y-You are talking about the work, right?" Nerissa didn't prepare for it and it sounded like a confession. Her face was blushing so hard and she started to look away from him.
"A-Ah, yeah. The Job, the job." As for Y/n, he didn't realize he said the cringey words. He even apologize to her if that sounded strange and ambigous, though he did say the words not about the job and he thought of something else.
"I see-" Both of them now had a very awkward atmosphere. And without noticing, Nerissa pointed at the apartment she lived in now. "I- I live there now" She said while her face remaining red and hot.
"I- I seee... there, huh..." When Y/n looked at the building, Y/n suddenly felt something was going wrong. He wanted to abandon the love he had to Nerissa, and just kept it by himself. But... "Nerissa, which number is your room?"
Y/n remembered that a few weeks ago there was someone just moved on next to his room. And now...
"Floor 4, number 414, why?"
"I- It is next to my room... Mine is... 413"
*TO BE CONTINUED*
Nb: I am learning to make the story longer, it would take longer time to write it too~ But I hope you enjoy it!
art: https://www.pixiv.net/en/artworks/110549033