⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️
SEXUAL ABUSE!
PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE OR HAVE EXPERIENCED by YOURSELF!!!
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“You have to die a few times before you can really live.”
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"Y/n!" I saw him gulp as I pushed the first strap of my dress off my shoulder with my finger.
Gosh , I was so nervous. Never would I have expected to do something like this.
"He wants my virginity Jungkook, but I don't want him to have it. "
Jungkook sighed and gently pulled me to him.
"So, you can't swim, you can't ice skate and you're still a virgin?"
I nodded..." ...and you taught me how to skate and since we're here I think you wanted to teach me how to swim and in return I'll give you my virginity. "
I could feel his heart beating, saw him swallow and I was so terribly excited. What if he turned me down, I would be so ashamed.
"Should ... shouldn't your first time be special?" Jungkook gently stroked my hair behind my ear with his fingers until he reached my neck.
He turned forward and tenderly kissed my skin, leaving a soft bite.
I closed my eyes . "The ambience is perfect!" I whispered and my fingers moved up under his shirt.
"Y/n!" he whispered my name and pulled the strap of my dress back onto my shoulder. "You don't want this now!"
I ran my nails gently down his back and felt him shiver. "Yes, I do!" I whispered back.
"I'm sure you'd be disappointed." He gently kissed my jawline.
I smiled and my fingers dug into the hem of his shirt. Slowly, I pulled it over his head. He didn't resist and my eyes scanned his torso.
Every single one of his muscles tensed with every little movement he made. A small moan escaped my lips. I began to lightly kiss the top of his ribcage. His smooth skin, so soft.
"I don't want him to ever get me!" I breathed softly against his skin and saw his breathing quicken.
Jungkook ran his index fingers under the straps of my dress and pulled them both down the sides of my arms. His lips found their way to my shoulders.
"Are you sure?" he asked me and I could tell he wanted to make sure he was doing the right thing.
My dress slid down my body and a light "Yes!" slipped over my lips.
We both looked at each other. I was so excited and felt ready for anything. I was free. At that moment, I didn't think about Junseo or what my mother must be going through. I didn't care about the paparazzi, I didn't care about the whole world. I only had one thought right now. I wanted to have sex with the man I loved. The one I thought I loved.
Jungkook smiled, took my hand and led me to one of the pool loungers. I sat down and he knelt in front of me, biting his lip lightly.his eyes traveled down my body. Apart from our soft breathing and the gentle rushing of the water, nothing could be heard. I reached behind me and unclasped my bra. I let it slide off me and swallowed, gosh my heart was beating like crazy. Am I really doing the right thing? I reached for his hand and placed it on my breast. His touch sent a thousand feelings through my body.
Jungkook leaned into a kiss towards me. Our lips entwined tenderly with slight moans.
"I want you!" he finally confessed and his lips explored my body. I leaned back and enjoyed every second with him. His fingers clutched the hem of my panties. I looked at him, my mouth slightly open, my eyes hooded and I nodded before lying completely naked in front of him.
"Jungkook!" I suddenly said in a trembling voice. "Did you ... I mean... with how many girls did you...!"
Jungkook leaned over me " Shhhh! Y/n! " He shook his head. " Don't ask that now!"
I swallowed and nodded, reaching for his belt and unbuckling it. I could feel how ready he was and my adrenaline shot up when I touched his bulge. Jungkook closed his eyes and bit his lip. I pulled down his boxers and his member stretched out towards me.
"I'm nervous!" I whispered and lay back. Jungkook kissed me tenderly as he spread my legs with his hips. "Relax!" he said and his hand traveled down my body until it paused between my legs. His light touch brought me down. I relaxed as his finger slipped between my folds. "Relax baby!" he whispered in my ear and began to play with my clit with gentle movements.
I heard my soft moans. And I felt my little movement as I pressed my pelvis against his finger. Gosh, that feeling was amazing. "Don't stop!" I begged softly as I felt the head of his member resting against my opening. "Jungkook!" I opened my eyes and looked at him. "Relax, I'll stop if it hurts you. You just have to say it. You set the pace!"
"Okay!" I nodded. "Okay!" and he slowly entered me.
I will never forget this feeling. No pain, he was so careful. I couldn't believe I was having sex. With him, here. It was beautiful. Jungkook took all the time for me, stopped, made sure I was okay and I was on wool seven.
"Are you okay?" he asked me afterwards and lay down next to me. Jungkook reached for the towel on the other lounge and covered our bodies.
"Yes! And you?" I asked back and smiled. He kissed my forehead, put his arm under my neck and pulled me towards him. "I am!"
I was still in the throes of emotion and hoped that time had stopped.
"I'm sorry!" I said and looked at him.
"You're sorry? Sorry for what?"
I took a deep breath. "That I took you by surprise like that!"
Jungkook wrinkled his nose with a smile. "And I thought you were so innocent. "
I let out a light laugh and snuggled up to him.
For a few minutes we just lay there and I knew it was working in him.
"Y/n!" he said and I turned my head towards him.
"What happened? I mean... Junseo!"
"Jungkook, I...!" I put my head on my hand. "I'm tired of taking the fall for everything anyone screws up. I want to be free."
"What do you mean?"
I sighed softly. "Today at noon, after you were in my office, my parents told me that I should marry Junseo. I was angry, ran away, Junseo came after me and he..."
"What? ..."
"He said something like, if I didn't do what he wanted, it would end badly for my parents. My mother told me that my father was in debt. But why get married right away?"
Jungkook cupped my cheek. "You ran away. "
"Yeah, and when I go back later I know the devil is waiting for me. But I'm finally free! For you!"
"Be careful, okay!" Jungkook lifted my chin and looked at me.
"I will!" and I leaned towards him and we kissed tenderly.
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
"And you really don't want me to walk you home?" Junkook put the last candle in his bag and looked up at me.
"If you want to be a dead man?" I joked, knowing that it was damn serious.
Jungkook and I made our way out to our cars. When I reached Sona's car, he turned me to face him.
"Call me. No matter what time. If you don't want to stay there, come to me. Or even better, don't go back. " Jungkook hugged me.
" I'll turn myself in! I'm not scared anymore!" I replied and released our embrace.
"Okay! Okay! But if..."
" I'll call you." I smiled and kissed his cheek. " Thank you!" I whispered and got into Sona's car.
"Y/n!" Jungkook held the car door open.
He knelt down. " I.... Love you!"
I think the smile on my face could still be seen on satellite pictures. "I love you too!" One last kiss before I went straight to hell.
It was almost dawn when I drove up the driveway of our mansion. No paparazzi, no flashlights, just the security guards walking around. I could still see a light on upstairs and hoped it was Grandma. She was always the first one up so early.
I snuck in and made sure no one would hear me. Past the dining room and past the large room that had attracted so much attention just a few hours ago.
I exhaled with relief as I made it upstairs, just past the guest room where my grandparents slept and then finally opened the door to my room.
I breathed a sigh of relief when I reached my room and closed the door behind me. I smiled contentedly and my thoughts whirled around Jungkook, around me and around the pool lounger on which I had sex with him.
I switched on the light and my smile disappeared.
I'll never forget that hateful look.
"Junseo " My heart was racing, I panicked.
"It's 4:30 in the morning!" He sat on my bed, stood up and came over to me.
I didn't move when he stood just a few centimeters in front of me, reached behind me and I heard the key turn!
"Where have you been!" he whispered, taking the key off and putting it in his pocket.
"That's none of your business anymore!" I replied and was about to walk past him when he grabbed my arm and pulled me over to my bed.
He spun me around and our faces were close together. " Where...the fuck...were you whore!"
I gasped to tell him where I was, but I paused. Junseo screwed up his face and nodded. "Oh, I get it!" I landed on my bed with a shove.
I was shocked and couldn't react quickly when he already had me between his legs. He reached next to me and I saw that it was his belt. Junseo leaned towards me. His face was flushed, his teeth clenched and he hissed at me quietly. " You... made a big mistake!"
"Junseo , I..." and I felt this burning pain on my face. I became short of breath and then I heard the tearing of the fabric of my dress.
"He had you hmm?" I heard him say as he grabbed my wrists.
"Junseo....!" I said dazedly.
"You little fucking whore, you gave him what was mine? I'll show you what's mine!"
Junseo tied my wrists to my bed with his belt. I felt, no, I sensed that this was going wrong. So wrong.
"Junseo, please don't!" my eyes filled with tears, I could hardly see him anymore. "What are you after?"
Suddenly I heard his vibrating breath in my ear.
"I'm going to fuck you so you remember who you belong to and if you scream I'll make your lover's life and that of his family hell. Starting with his pretty little sister. I bet you she won't say no when she's in my bed."
"Junseo Please don't!" I panicked, should I call for help? Are they just empty words or will he really do it.
I heard his pants fall and closed my eyes, pinched my lips together and sobbed, the next thing I felt was Junseo tearing my panties. How he put his hand around my throat, how he leaned towards me. "You shouldn't have let him fuck you Y/n!" and he entered me.
"Oh fuck!" Junseo moaned above me and I felt sick to my stomach. "After that i want to hear who fucks better!"
I heard him talking, I heard him enjoying having me. At a certain point, I switched off all my bodily functions. I was no longer myself. Not even a tear ran down my face. I turned my head to the side and stared out of the window, watching the little white flakes fall and remembering that it was Christmas Eve.
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(It took courage for me to publish this, I'm so sorry).