October 2023
Malachi
The bus comes to a halt on the one road highway, and I see my chance. Did the Briar Institution have a fire out of nowhere? Absolutely not. I set that shit up to get my plans in motion. I've been there for far too long, and I've calculated my plans.. only took me fourteen fucking years. Every time those stupid fucking orderlies would send us for "outside" time, I took it upon myself to collect sticks, branches, and leaves. Fortunately for me, I didn't have room checks, therefore they never found my little stick collection under my shit sprigged mattress. It only took patience, which I've come to have over a decade of being locked away in that crazy house. My brother's murder was put on me, but dear old dad took the stand at trial, telling them all of my hidden secrets. How I had been to therapist for my behavior issues. How I've acted in violent manners my whole life, which is false. Who doesn't get a little violent sometimes? How I would talk to myself for hours on end? Another allegation that is false. I only talk to myself when I have to amp myself up for something. A test, gym, bullies, and of course for my little dove.
I planted fires with my little stick friends around the most important places in that shit hole of institution. The day room, the kitchen, doctors offices, and of course the gym area. You may ask how I did this, well to contrary belief I am a precise man now. Patience. My next-room neighbor Dexter was delusional, lost in his own mind. When I tell you this man looks like an eight foot Greek god of sorts with giant muscles.. he's huge. His blonde hair flows like a Viking warrior. But I feel bad for the poor son of a bitch, he means well, but he is by far the craziest fucker I've ever met. He told everyone that the angels come and see him, looking like chubby little cherubs you see painted on church walls. I used this information to my advantage. Today I used his weakness for my gain. I saw him during cafeteria lunch time and told him the cherubs told me they will no longer see him.. that they are flying away back to their heaven. To my non surprise he flipped a fucking lid, throwing god damn tables-throwing and patients around the fucking room. Did I feel bad? Sure... I mean he was my only friend here, but I have a vendetta to deal with. And that vendetta is revenge.
Lighting one fire by one during my poor Dexter's demise, the place lit up like Christmas lights on houses in Hadestown. Sirens blared throughout the ward, sending us all to our rooms. When the fire was no longer containable all patients were rushed to buses to go to a near by facility, and that brings us to now. Everything is working out just the way I planned, and I get hard just thinking about how my calculated plan worked.
The halt to the bus brings some patients into a frenzy. Some screaming, some rocking back and forth, and some singing. For me I know my plan. They didn't chain us like maybe they are supposed to do since for what they know we are crazy. I think that the unknown scares normal people, to be different is to be an outcast. Me.. well I've always been an outcast, and I never shied to be anything different. Fuck Society, fuck what is normal. Normal is fucking boring. I unclasp the shitty eighty's seat belt and poke my head up, observing the bus driver. He's an orderly.. John. He's actually the most vile piece of shit I've ever known, taken advantage of the woman in the ward. Some have turned a blind eye to his acts, but I certainly didn't. He takes advantage of our kind. I wish I had a blade to slice right across his fat fucking neck, but I have more important things to take care of. John huffs, putting his head back on the rest of his driver chair. "Will you all shut the fuck up?" He yells, but no one stops.
I squirm my body to the end of seat, and then bring my body to the ground. My belly lay flat on the walkway of the bus. I army crawl to the back of the bus, to the back exit. I flip on my back slowly, looking up at Luna. She's a patient I've run into a few times, she's just as crazy as me. "You're leaving?" She whispers, leaning her head down. Her blonde locks tickle my nose. "I have a few things I have to take care of.. will you cover me love?" I ask so politely it makes me sick. She gives me a Cheshire smile, "Of course." I hear her seatbelt unclasp and she stands ripping her shirt off. Her small tits exposed to everyone on the bus. She walks forward toward John who looks like he in awe of her perky breast. "Can I touch them?" I hear him ask, and I know that's my out. The man is a filthy vile pig. I hope I catch up with him one day. I flip, unlatching the back of the bus, opening the door ever so slightly before shimming myself out. The fresh air hits my nose, and the fact that everything is working out in my favor just sends a high to my head. I walk at a fast pace into the nearby woods, because I know exactly where I am.. and where exactly I am going. I need to see if my dove has flourished. I need to see her.. it's been far too long. And I am only about three miles out of Hadestown. I'm coming for you my love.
*
Did I sneak into my childhood home where my parents still reside and take my clothes my mother never packed away you ask? Yes. My mother, the most purest, sweetest woman I have ever known left both Julian and I's room untouched.. even after all these years. She probably got a beating for that from my father, the piece of shit he is. I was able to scavenge a pair of black tight jeans, a black hoodie, and a black baseball cap from my old room. My mother loved Julian and I with her whole fucking being, unfortunately for her.. my father did not. He was too busy drinking and taking his plummeting stocks out on her. She visited me the first two years I was in that place, only once a month. Then quickly that stopped, and I knew why. Him. My father. I know deep in my gut it was him who killed my blossoming brother. Dad couldn't handle the fact that Julian was thriving.. no one can thrive unless Dad was.
Once I'm dressed and out of that filthy grey uniform, I walk slow out of my old room hoping to just get a small glimpse of my mother.. who lay bed ridden now. I know my father isn't here, probably too busy making bets on some fucking stupid sports team down at the local bar, leaving her all alone. I walk to my right down a small hallway passing Julian's room, and to my parents. She lay there on a breathing machine, her vibrant red hair now non existent. I walk slowly, sitting on the lazy-boy that is beside her. Her eyes are closed, her breathing slow, I know she can't hear me. I take her hand in mine and kiss the top, "Mom, it's me Kai. I love you.. I miss you.. and i'll always be here." I intertwine my fingers in hers, and I feel her energy. She's here.. somewhere. "I'm going to find out who did this to him, and I will fucking end them. I promise you that," I pause placing her hand back on the cotton bed sheet. I stand leaning over her to place a kiss on her forehead, "I love you mom, I'll be okay I promise." Tears prick at my eyes but I feel the urge to vomit. My mother has saved me more times than I could ever be grateful for. She didn't deserve this type of end. The nicest soul I have ever know. I walk towards to the doorway, never looking back but always looking forward. That was always what she said to me.
*
I walk around town with my head down, not that anyone would even recognize me. Last time I was in this shit boring town was when I was sixteen, just being a weird kid. I loved that my older brother thrived so I didn't have too. The small shops are all to close together practically overlapping the other, but it's one in particular I am looking for. 'Pats Pets'. I need to get my dove.. a dove. Lavender Scott has always been my obsession. She was the air I breathed, the neurons in my brain, and I refuse to just let her go. Countless nights jerking off to that perfect face. Her perfect brown eyes covered with square glasses, her slender nose, her little puffy cheeks. Thinking about her gets me hard. What we did in that library all those years ago may seem like ancient history for her, but it feels like yesterday to me. Her stroking my cock as I fingered her tight wet cunt. Wet for me.. fuck. I let out a breath before walking into the pet shop. "Welcome to Pats Pets", the old lady says from behind the counter. "Fuck off." I walk over to the birds, finding a cage of doves. I need to pick the perfect one, it has to be the perfect one. "Hey lady, I want this one," I signal to her. She walks over, her grey hair pulled back in a bun. "Of course. Do you have an appropriate cage and food?" She asks with a smile. I give her an irritated look back, "Yes, can I have the dove already?" She scurries off getting a cardboard box to place my dove into. "I'll meet you at the register," she says, picking my bird out of it's cage and bringing it up. She clicks her hand on the old register, "That'll be $60 sir." I take out crumbled money I stashed in my back pocket from dads 'stash draw' and proceed to pay her. "Well you have a good day.." She stops, waiting for me to say my name. Small town people. "Kai." Everyone knew me as Malachi back then. She nods her head, giving me my cardboard box. I scurry out, walking behind the building and into the large forest that surrounds this hell town. I can't wait to send my message to my dove.
*
I snapped the poor doves neck. I feel bad, I do.. but the birds purpose in life was for this. Everyone has a purpose in life, even animals. I take the small notepad that was on my desk in what used to be my room, along with a pen. I write my cryptic message to her, I want her to fear me. I want her to worry. My Livy is a realist though, which will make this so much fun. I won't strike until necessary. I want to drag this out as long as I can, because her fear is what I want. When I take her.. she won't want another. I have pent up years on her, and she'll know it.. feel it. I could have had sex locked away for what everyone thought was forever, but I didn't. It was always her. I sit on a nearby bench adjacent from her little bookshop. My bookworm finally prospered. I watch through the windows, at her, laying the bird beneath the bench. I can see her eyes deep in probably some romance book, thinking of her prince charming, unknowingly knowing that the devil is about to corrupt her. Stalk her. I'm here beneath the shadows.