A/N: Hii everyone, so sorry for the late update but the past few weeks have been hectic but merry christmas to those that celebrate(d) and happy new year! <3Just a little trigger warning: there is some blood mentioned in this chapter and self h*rm.
Lucy's first carriage ride as a married woman was to a nearby inn, where she was to spend as much time as she could with her new husband to avoid any question regarding whether they had consummated the union. It was a short ride, filled with stolen glances and grins. It was funny in a way- Lucy finally felt like she was being courted, yet she was already technically married. She supposed the constant cloud of dread looming over her head over the past few weeks had vanished, which was why she finally could allow herself to be courted. There were no constraints anymore, and she could get to know Benedict in every way without fear or nervousness of her father getting angry. Without the threat of being married off to someone she barely knew, let alone loved. She no longer had to worry about the vile James Bancroft- a weight was truly lifted off of her shoulders. The only obstacle that was left to overcome would be facing her father after what she had done, which was not something she was looking forward to. The thought kept her spirits high, she reminded herself, was that she would have the support of everyone else she loved. The carriage came to a halt at the inn, and Benedict's loose grip on Lucy's hand tightened affectionately before letting go.
"We're here," he spoke, as he exited the carriage first in order to aid his new bride down the step. He outstretched his hand, which was holding on to Lucy's just moments before, and she graciously accepted it with a bashful smile. She stepped onto the muddy ground and walked hand in hand alongside Benedict through the front door of the establishment, and caught a glimpse of Colin and Henry speaking to the innkeeper. The three of them appeared deep in conversation, and then Henry dropped a bag filled with what was presumably a sizeable amount of money in front of the rugged-looking man. The three of them then smiled and nodded at each other, as though they were all old friends. Money had substantial power, it seemed. Benedict guided Lucy to the two boys, who turned around when they heard footsteps and the rustle of clothing approaching.
"Ah, perfect timing- our rooms are ready-" Henry began.
"And we've ensured that not a word will be said if your father comes looking for you," Colin added, his white teeth and tanned skin glimmering in the candlelight. He had just returned from one of his trips to central Europe, so he had that European glow about him.
"Thank you, both of you. Well, all three of you, I suppose," Lucy said with a sheepish grin.
"You've saved me from a lifetime of misery, I don't know how I will ever make it up to you," She added.
"Nonsense, you're my sister," Henry responded.
"And mine too, now," Colin added, chuckling.
"We are officially family, it seems. It has been a long time coming, although I never thought it would be the two of us joining our families," Benedict beamed.
"Yes, we all knew how obsessed Henry was with-" a cough cut off Colin from Henry, who attempted to cover up whatever Colin was about to say- that was something Lucy definitely had to ask Henry about sometime in the future.
"I think it's time to retire, I'm exhausted and I'm sure Lucy is as well after today's events," Henry interrupted. Lucy nodded in agreement, as did Benedict and Colin, though they had somewhat patronizing smirks on their faces. Judging by the redness that appeared on Henry's cheeks, Lucy thought it would be best to make a swift exit and nudged her new husband in the arm. He glanced at her and relented, leading the way up the stairs and to their room after the two of them said their goodnights to Colin and Henry. The inn was not as bad as she thought it would be when she judged it from the outside. The dark wooden paneling was warm and inviting, as was the smell of cinnamon and firewood that mixed with the scent of whiskey in the air. It almost reminded her of Christmas, if only the air was as crisp and cold as it was during that time of the year. Lucy stepped through the threshold of the room's door, taking in the atmosphere- it was equally as cozy as the rest of the place. The bed was draped in a dark green shade that matched the curtains and carpet, and there was a selection of wines on a table for the two of them to indulge in. Benedict walked into the room, already comfortable, while Lucy lingered in place unsure of what to do next. He turned around and looked at her, and seemingly picked up on her uncertainty.
"We don't have to do anything, Luce, just so you know. I don't expect anything from you that you are not willing to give," he said, a soft smile of reassurance on his face.
"Sorry, I'm just not sure I'm ready yet," she replied, her voice uneven. There was a safe distance between them while they were conversing for the first time as a married couple alone, behind closed doors.
"Lucy, er- how much do you actually... know?" Benedict asked, smirking slightly. Lucy felt her cheeks burn, and she cursed at herself in her head. She had to learn to control that, and soon.
"I know what occurs, in the- uh- marital bed. I know it is not always pleasant, and I also know it is my duty so I do plan on fulfilling it, but I hope you can understand that I need some time," Lucy responded nervously. Benedict then inched towards her slowly, continuing the conversation.
"It can be pleasant, though. When people truly care for each other, it can be more than just pleasant for both of them- us," he said. The gap between them was lessened by his movement towards her, and she felt her heart flutter.
"Really?" she asked, quietly. Her interest was piqued at that point. She was not aware that it could feel good for her- she was told that she would get used to it eventually, but not enjoy it.
"Yes. But do not worry, I shall wait until you are ready, Lucy," he replied. The space between them was almost nonexistent at that point. A beat of silence filled the room for a brief period of time, and Benedict reached his hand up to tuck a loose strand of hair behind Lucy's ear. His thumb then ran along her cheekbone lightly, before he cupped her cheek with the palm of his hand. His other hand found its way to her hand and held it softly.
"Thank you, Benedict," she whispered.
"There's no need to thank me, Lucy. All I want is for you to be happy and comfortable," he replied, still holding onto her.
"This is a good start, then," she responded, forcing a nervous giggle. Benedict then dropped his hand from her face, after letting it linger there for a few more seconds, and led her to the table that was occupied with the wine.
"In the meantime, we can celebrate in other ways," he smirked, holding up a glass and pouring a generous amount of the maroon-red liquid into it. Lucy giggled and accepted the glass he offered her, and sat down opposite her husband who was indulging himself in some wine too. They chatted for a long while, neither of them feeling brave enough to initiate going to sleep. Lucy was tired, but she did not know how to communicate that to Benedict. She did want him to sleep in the same bed as her, but she had no idea if he wanted that as well and was too shy to bring the topic up. Sharing a bed with a man was something she had never done, and it was another step into womanhood in her book. After some more time, though, Lucy couldn't stifle her yawns for any longer, and Benedict finally picked up on her sleepiness.
"We should probably get some rest, I suppose," He said slightly awkwardly. He began playing with his fingers.
"Yes I think so," Lucy replied, also playing with her fingers. Benedict glanced around the room nervously for a few seconds and then cleared his throat.
"Well, I'll take the floor-" he began before being cut off by Lucy's higher-pitched than normal voice.
"Oh, there's no need for that, I'm sure. The bed is rather large, after all," She interrupted. Silence again. After a few seconds of just staring at each other, wide-eyed, Benedict broke into a grin.
"How long do you think it will take for us to get used to this?" he asked, laughing. Lucy then returned his smile with a breathy chuckle of her own.
"Not very, I hope," she responded. Her heart came to a slight halt then, when the realization dawned on her that she had to change for the night.
"I, er- I need to get ready first, though," she spoke up and waited for him to respond. Instead of saying anything he just stared at her and nodded, with a slightly confused look in his eye. Dear god. She maintained eye contact with him, allowing him time to realize for himself what she was insinuating. He did not realize what she was insinuating.
"I need to change, Benedict," She said.
"Oh, right, yes of course. I'll just, erm, sit down. Turn the chair around until you're done," he replied, an awkward smile lingering on his face. His cheeks were red for once, not Lucy's. He walked back over to where he was sitting moments before and turned the chair to face the other side of the room and continued sipping on his wine, averting his eyes as he promised. Lucy took a deep breath and undressed. She laid her dress across one of her luggage chests, too tired to put it away, and reached into a different one to pull out a nightgown. She quickly noticed that all of the nightgowns that Daphne had packed were incredibly sheer and risqué, and she cursed in her head. She settled on a simple white one, the most modest-looking of them all. Still, though, it was more revealing than she would have liked. After slipping into it, Lucy pulled out the pins in her hair and allowed it to flow freely down her body.
"I'm finished now," She spoke, her voice quiet. Benedict cocked his head sideways briefly, before standing up and turning around fully. His eyes softened immediately.
"How is it possible?" he muttered, setting his wine glass down.
"How is what possible?" Lucy asked, still struggling to speak like a normal person.
"That you look even more beautiful now than you do all dressed up at some ball," He replied simply. She didn't even think he meant to compliment her directly, it seemed as though he was just thinking out loud. He looked at her- not in a ravenous and demeaning way like so many other men do, but in a way that one would look at a beautiful and intricate Renaissance sculpture. She didn't know what to say or do, so she just smiled and made her way to the bed. Pulling back the warm and soft covers, she hopped in and made herself comfortable. Benedict followed, but before he got into bed he reached down and pulled his linen shirt up and over his torso, much to Lucy's surprise. She didn't know where to look. He had a magnificent frame, defined and milky white, and she felt a fluttery feeling in her lower abdomen at the sight of him. He then kicked off his shoes, and his hands made their way to the button of his trousers but froze, seemingly rethinking what he was about to do.
"Forgive me, I usually sleep without so many... layers," he said, grinning. Her eyes widened even more.
"Oh, don't worry, I won't. It's just a habit, that's why I went to undo them. I wouldn't subject you to that right now," he joked, and Lucy allowed herself to laugh. In all honesty, she didn't know how to behave. She didn't know what was appropriate of a girl of her status in this situation, and she felt a slight resentment for all the women in her family who had gotten married, for the reason that she was never taught by them how exactly to conduct herself in this state. It was something that she would have to figure out by herself.
"Are you alright, Luce?" Benedict asked.
"Yes, I'm fine, honestly," She offered a smile. He shot her a look that implied he didn't believe her.
"You know I really don't mind sleeping on the floor," he began, before being interrupted by Lucy.
"No, no. We are married now, and I'm fine. This is all just new to me, is all," she explained, and he nodded in acknowledgment. He pulled down the bedsheets on his side and got into bed beside his new blushing bride. They both lay there for a bit, staring at the dark wooden ceiling. Neither of them had blown out the candles, which implicitly meant that they both still did not want the night to end. Suddenly, Benedict turned onto his side. Lucy craned her neck to look at him, still lying on her back.
"What are you thinking about, Luce," He asked. He laid there, content, waiting for her response.
"I'm happy, excited. And scared. Scared of what my father will do, but I'm mostly happy," she responded.
"He won't do anything, he can't. You're safe now, Lucy. You have quite a few people in your corner. And I'm sure your mother will do her best to calm him down" Benedict replied softly and Lucy let out a sigh. He reached his hand up to her face and brushed his thumb along her cheek, then tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She didn't know what came over her, but before she even realized what she was doing she leaned into his face and her lips were inches away from his. his eyes widened slightly at the sudden movement, and then he relaxed equally as fast, giving in to the mesmerizing beauty lying beside him. The kiss was a modest but long one, and they could both feel the heat radiating off of one another. His lips tasted exotic, and Lucy supposed that was the perfect word to describe kissing him. The feeling was entirely foreign to her, but the sweet and tobacco-flavored kiss felt like home at the same time. Both of them pulled away. They quickly fell asleep face to face, wordless and finally gratified.
-----------------
The next few days seemed to pass by in a blur, and much to the group's content, no word had reached them from the Blackthornes or the Bridgertons, meaning that they were not found out. They succeeded. Colin and Henry spent their days at the inn together, while Lucy and Benedict took the time to get to know one another as husband and wife in every way except one. The morning that they were meant to be leaving, the new couple were eating breakfast together in their room.
"Who did Henry have a soft spot for?" Lucy spoke up, braking Benedict out of his morning daze.
"Hmm?" He responded.
"Oh, uh, I'm not sure if I should say," He added with a chuckle. Lucy felt a flash of frustration- she hated not being in on things like this.
"Come on, I'm your wife now. I won't tell anyone. You and Colin were teasing him about it the night we got here," She prodded. One way or another, she was going to find out. Henry was always very proper when it came to his private feelings about women, even though he and Lucy were close.
"He'll kill me if he finds out I told you though," he replied, stuffing a piece of bread into his mouth.
"I'll kill you if you don't tell," Lucy replied, a stern yet comical look on her face.
"Alright, alright. He fancied Daphne for a while until she married Simon. In all honesty, I don't think he's over her yet," He laughed and conceded.
"Daphne?" Lucy asked, shocked. She hadn't even an inkling that he ever felt that way about her.
"Yeah. Although I hear he has his sights set on a new redhead these days," Benedict stated, seemingly uninterested and oblivious to the joy that this new gossip had brought Lucy.
"Well now you have to tell me more, Benedict," She pried.
"I promise you that I do not know more, wife, but once I find anything out you will be the first to know," He laughed. She nodded in agreement, satisfied with his answer, and the two of them continued eating.
Once they finished up, Lucy made sure they had everything packed and ready to head back to London. The couple were nearly out the door when Benedict stopped in his tracks and turned back around, facing the bed and walking towards it.
"I almost forgot," he muttered as he pulled back the dark green sheets, exposing the mattress cover. Lucy was confused as she watched him pull out a small knife and pull up the leg of his trousers, setting his foot on top of the bed.
"What are you doing?" She asked, closing the door.
"Your father needs to think we, er- consummated the marriage. We'll bring the sheets back and show them to him if he tries to get an annulment," He responded. What he did next was the last thing she thought he would do. He sliced into the skin on his leg and allowed it to bleed onto the bed, much to Lucy's horror.
"Benedict, what on earth are you doing?" she raced towards him. He just grinned at her, not concerned at what he had just done.
"Has to be real blood. It has to be convincing," He stated nonchalantly. She just stared at him, slack-jawed. The man she had married was an interesting one, to say the least.
"Alright, let's put that in the luggage and leave then," he said.
Lucy composed herself and followed her husband's lead. The couple left the room that they had become accustomed to in their first days of marriage for the last time, meeting their siblings in the bar on the ground floor of the inn. Henry and Colin were cheerful as ever and bid the couple to join them for some early drinks before they went back to London, which they happily agreed to. Half an hour went by, the four of them enjoying each other's company for the last time on their impromptu little holiday, and then they left the inn in high spirits. The journey back to London was long and bumpy, but all Lucy felt was peace. Peace for the first time in a long time. Even though she knew it wouldn't last for much longer, she basked in it.
When they approached the outskirts of London, the peace she was feeling began to slowly fizzle away and was replaced with concern. She knew that the first place that the four of them would be stopping at would be Blackthorne Hall so that she could face her father after being away for three days. It was a necessity, she knew that, but that didn't stop the dread from forming a pit in her stomach. She was not only scared for herself but also for her brother. He was, after all, at the receiving end of their father's fury. The familiar exterior of her London home came into view, and a figure emerged from the door and watched their carriages approach the house. Then, the figure retreated inside and returned moments later with what Lucy could see was a red-faced Duke.
A/N: Dont forget to comment and vote if you enjoyeddd heheheh.
also, the part with the knife was inspired by a scene in the tv show "The Spanish Princess"- its a great show and if you guys are interested in the Tudor era you should definitely give it a watch :)