Yosuke's POV:
JunezPrince2000: jus had
the shittiest day
Error: Message cannot send.
What the hell?
I sit up this time, trying again.
Error: Message cannot send.
...Huh?
I check her profile, but it's all blank. Our conversation is still here, sure, but... Where the hell is she?
...I freaked her out, didn't I?
Fuck!
I drove her away. I was too forward; I was too desperate...
Fuck...
I clutch my cell in my hands, fighting back the tears.
How could I be so dumb?
She's deleted her account. She's gone.
Fuck everything!
Without thinking, I toss my phone across the room. But, fuck it, right? She's gone, and she's all that ever mattered to me.
I hug my knees, trying to hold back the tears. But all I do is choke on them.
"Are you crying?"
"What?" I lift my face up, my heart pounding.
Teddie's stood there, confused, and with Yu not far behind him.
Shit...
I quickly wipe my eyes, standing up.
Yu heads to the corner of my room, picking my cell up before handing it back to me. "You're lucky it didn't smash."
"...Thanks," I gulp, taking it from him.
"Sensei got me ice cream on the way home," Teddie grins.
"Who gives a fuck?" I snap.
"Yosuke," Yu sighs.
"You both gotta go."
"B-but, I live here," Teddie splutters.
"Go see Dad, or something. Just don't bother me."
"Fine," he huffs, turning on his heels to leave.
Yu doesn't, though. Of course he doesn't.
"Yu," I breathe.
"What's the matter?" He turns to me, frowning.
"What?"
"I mean, why was your cell over there on the ground?" He points back to the corner.
"No reason," I shrug.
"And why are you crying?"
"Dude, just... Just fuck off, alright?"
"Yosuke-"
"Seriously," I snap. "You need to back off."
"I don't understand-"
My cell buzzes in my hand. And, for a split second, I have hope. I have hope that she's back; that she's trying to apologize, trying to start up a conversation.
But, nah.
Chie. Mocking me. Again.
Yu looks down at my phone. "Just Chie, eh?"
"Will you stop?" I frown, pulling my cell to my chest.
"I didn't mean to pry."
"Yeah, well, you did."
"Have I upset you?"
"No," I snap. "I just-"
"I have, haven't I?"
"Yu, I don't have the energy to argue."
"What's the matter?" He mutters. "Please, Yosuke, I'm your friend."
I swallow hard.
"You know I am," he shrugs. "And... and you know I'm happy for you, right?"
"Huh?"
"You and... that girl."
"Yuna?" I scoff.
He nods, biting his lip.
"Well, that's ended," I say, tossing my phone on my bed.
"...I'm sorry?" He asks.
"She's gone," I mumble, flopping onto the bed myself.
"Oh." He sits down with me. And even though I'd much prefer if he left... It's comforting having him here, in a way.
"She left me."
"I'm sure that's not the case."
"What would you know?" I snap, sitting back up to face him.
"...From what I could tell, she cared about you a lot."
"And now she's gone. She's not coming back, Yu."
"I'm positive there's a logical explanation."
"I bet you wish there wasn't."
"What?"
I hold my breath.
He must know I know, right? I mean... C'mon...
"Just go," I mutter.
"Yosuke-"
"I don't want you here."
He nods slowly, biting his lip. "I'm sorry."
"What?" I frown, looking back up at him.
For kissing me? For liking me? For... thinking about me!?
"For not inviting you."
"Oh."
"That's why you're upset, right?"
"Yeah..."
I can't put it into words. Not now, I can't. I need to get my head around this...
"She'll be back, Yosuke."
"Doubt it."
"Have faith."
~~~
Yuna18: Good morning.
JunezPrince2000: holy shit ur bk!!
JunezPrince2000: wht happened??
Yuna18: I'm sorry.
Yuna18: I was trying to
update the app and it
deactivated my account.
JunezPrince2000: i was up all
nite thinkin bout u
Yuna18: You don't mean that.
JunezPrince2000: i do
JunezPrince2000: i was scared yuna
Yuna18: You have nothing
to be scared of.
JunezPrince2000: i didn't want
you to leave me
Yuna18: How could I ever do
that to you?
JunezPrince2000: sry
JunezPrince2000: dont mean 2
b a downer
Yuna18: I'll be your shoulder
to cry on.
JunezPrince2000: damn
JunezPrince2000: ur so sweet
~~~
Yu's POV:
Thank god I could retrieve it...
Sure, it was a lot of hassle. Sure, I was up all night trying to fix the mess I made, but, hell, was it worth it.
Kanji just doesn't understand. He never will understand what it's like to feel like this about someone you can't have. He'll never understand the measures you have to take to make things work.
"Phone down at the table, Yu."
"Sorry, Uncle."
I quickly pocket my phone, returning to my breakfast.
"Did you enjoy the beach yesterday, big bro?" Nanako asks.
"I sure did," I nod.
"I wish I could have come..."
"You asked me to pay for piano lessons," Dojima scoffs. "You can't excuse your way out of them, young lady."
"Sorry, Dad," she sighs.
"Next time, okay?" I promise.
"Uh-huh!" She giggles.
"...Are you going to the shrine?"
"Sorry?" I perk my head in Dojima's direction.
"Today," he shrugs. "It's the festival, isn't it?"
"...I haven't made any plans," I admit.
"I think it would do you good."
I blink, looking at him in disbelief. Since when did he give a shit about me?
"I have some stuff to do from work, so-"
There it is. The real reason he wants me out. So I don't snoop around his work files.
"Can I go, too?" Nanako gasps.
"Nanako, I-"
"Sure you can," I smile.
"Oh! Yay!"
"Yu-"
"She needs this, too," I say.
"Fine," he rolls his eyes.
~~~
Yosuke's POV:
"Free samples!" I yell out, to anybody who can actually hear me over the commotion.
Dad said it'd be a good idea to promote new stuff at the shrine, 'cause so many people turn up at this time of year.
I wouldn't mind so much if Teddie was helping out, instead of flirting with whoever the hell he sees.
Geez... That bear has no bounds...
Occasionally, yes, I do check my cell. She hasn't messaged, though. I guess she's busy, too. I won't bother her. I doubt I'll have chance to reply, anyway...
I wonder if she's at an event today.
I smile a little, wondering if she's wearing a yukata.
Damn. Sucks she's not local. I'd die to see her everyday.
"Narukami, nine o'clock." Suzuki coughs, nudging me in the arm.
"What?"
I turn and, yeah. He's there. Nanako in hand, too.
All the girls here are fawning over him, 'cause... well, he's in a yukata, too.
I bite my tongue.
He looks... really good.
It's gray, and if drapes perfectly around his shoulders. It's not too big; it's not too small. It has a couple of flower patterns down it, and cuts off by his ankles, met with his geta at the bottom.
"Staring gives him satisfaction," Suzuki scoffs. "Don't do that."
I nod quickly, tearing my eyes away.
And it's like... some sort of fiery feeling in my chest. Like I'm freaking dying to look at him again.
What the fuck...?
"Hanamura," he snaps. "Go hand out these samples by the fortune box. I'll get the people coming in."
"S-sure."
~~~
Yu's POV:
I sure as hell hope I've put this on right...
I swallow hard, but Yosuke isn't even looking.
He's just doing his job. Good for him, right...?
"Senpai?"
I turn my head back towards the entrance. "Naoto?"
"Oh." He pauses, eyes wide. "You're... in a yukata."
"...Do I look strange?"
"Not, uhm... Exactly," he chuckles. "I suppose you're dressing to impress."
"...That's one reason," I breathe. I jerk my head in the direction of Yosuke.
"H-him?" He splutters.
I nod slowly. "I know he's... a bit of a ass, but-"
"Like I said before," he cuts me off. "I'm not one to judge."
I smile a little. "Thank you... Would you care to join us?"
"Uh, 'us'?" He raises an eyebrow.
"My little cousin shouldn't be far," I chuckle. "She was just so excited, and-"
"Nanako-chan, yes?"
"...Yeah."
"...Are you close with her?"
"I'd say so, yes," I nod.
He still looks troubled.
"Naoto?"
"...I want you to take care of her."
"What?"
"Just... promise me you will. Please, Senpai..."
He's closer to Dojima than I am. If he's giving me advice about something like this... I really should take it.
"Of course."
He relaxes a little. "I'm not superstitious myself, but... Care to get your fortune with me?"
"But... That's where-"
I cut myself off.
Of course.
He's not like Kanji. He actually wants me to get close to Yosuke. It's... a nice change.
~~~
Yosuke's POV:
"Excuse me." I feel a light tap on my shoulder.
"Yes, hey." I turn around. "Would you like a—"
I blink, taking a step back.
"Your tray is empty, Senpai," he mutters.
"S-Senpai?"
"Naoto is joining Yasogami as a first year in September," Yu says.
"...Cool," I grunt, turning away.
"It's alright," Naoto shrugs. "We can get free samples from someone else, can't we?"
I watch as the two turn, eyeing up Suzuki.
No... No freakin' way. He has no filter; he's gonna blow this whole thing...
"Actually, guys," I say, loud enough for them to turn back. "I'll go get some right now... Just wait here, alright?"
"It's... no bother if you're all out," Yu smiles.
"I'm not," I scoff. "Dammit, just... wait one second..."
~~~
I turn back to the cooler, refilling my tray as fast as I can, trying to avoid anyone else who wants a sample.
He's sat there with Naoto. They're... sat pretty close together.
I try to avert my eyes, but... Seriously?
I'm supposed to be his damn mystery girl. He's supposed to be in love with me.
...Wow. That sounded...
I shake my head.
I'm just saying. Why is he with him, huh?
I get struck out of my thoughts when a small thud hits my legs.
"Watch out," I scold, looking down.
"Sorry, Yosuke-kun..."
"N-Nanako-chan?" I splutter. "No, I'm sorry, I just..." I sigh. "I was distracted. It was my fault."
"Are those for big bro?" She points at my plate, smile wide.
"N-not all of them are for Yu, Nanako-chan," I chuckle.
"...Are you and big bro still friends?"
"What?" I frown. "O-of course we are... What made you say that?"
"You never come around anymore."
"I've just been... busy."
"And big bro spends all his time in his room to avoid Dad," she mutters. "I think he's lonely."
Dammit... This isn't my fault, so... Why do I feel so damn guilty?
"Big bro loves you, Yosuke-kun."
I bite my tongue until my eyes water.
"I'm gonna go play with my friends again," she says. "Bye!"
~~~
Yu's POV:
"It... doesn't seem like he's coming back," Naoto murmurs.
I lift my head, and he's out of sight.
I hold my breath.
But then my eyes stray to the enterance of the shrine and I'm met with a not-so-happy Kanji Tatsumi.
Dammit.
"Yu," he grunts, storming towards us.
I quickly stand up, Naoto following my lead.
"Ah, Kanji-kun," he nods. "Are you here for the festival as well?"
His eyes don't leave me.
"Sorry, Naoto," I murmur. "Would you mind taking care of Nanako for a few minutes?"
"Hm?" His eyes widen. "Of course, but... is there an issue?"
"No," I assure him. "Sorry to dump her on you."
"It's no issue," he shrugs. "So long as you promise to bring me back some takoyaki."
I smile a little at his request. "Sure thing."
~~~
"Kanji—" I try, following him into the shopping district.
"Where was my invite, huh?" He keeps waking, not even sparing me a glance.
"The same place Yosuke's invite was yesterday."
He stops now, turning around. "What the hell?"
"Naoto just found me," I sigh. "That's all."
"Close-up chats, huh?" He sneers, getting all up in my face.
"Don't tell me you're jealous."
He takes a step back, blinking.
"Kanji, two things," I mutter. "One: I'd never do that to you, and two: I love Yosuke. You know this."
"S-sorry, I just..." He looks away. "I saw you two together, and... I thought you were... I don't know. Bonding."
"Kanji—"
"Without me," he finishes. "I'm not just jealous of you, Yu," he shrugs. "I was jealous of him, too. I... I don't wanna be left out."
"That was never my intention," I assure him.
"I know." He kicks the ground. "It's just the way it looked..." He looks back to me, pursing his lips. "You look good, by the way."
I chuckle softly. "I was wondering when you'd notice."
"I bet Yosuke-senpai thought so, too," he says. "Rumour has it, he's a sucker for girls in yukata— Oh."
...Yeah. Oh.
"G-guys, too, I'm sure," he stammers. "Everyone looks good in yukata..."
I shake my head. "It wasn't to impress him. At least, not primarily. Nanako asked me to wear one. She didn't want to feel like an outcast."
He smiles a little. "That bastard doesn't deserve you and your warm heart, Senpai."
He doesn't deserve everything I'm doing to him, either...
"How did he take it, by the way?"
"What?" I frown.
"Y'know. Yuna. Account. Gone."
"Oh," I nod. "H-he was a little upset, from what I could tell."
"A little?" He raises an eyebrow.
"She wasn't everything to him, you know, Kanji."
"That's not what you were saying yesterday."
"Drop it," I groan.
Sure enough, he zips it.
But his lips still twitch; like he wants to say something more.
"Kanji..." I breathe.
I look all around us. The district is practically empty, what with the festival down the road.
I need Yosuke.
I grab ahold of Kanji's collar when he suddenly stops me.
"Wh-what the hell, man?"
I swallow hard, stepping back. "Wh-what?"
"You're the one who said we had to stop."
"Y-yeah, but—"
"It's too risky, isn't it?" He frowns.
"Kanji, please—"
"You can't keep changing your mind like this, Yu," he sighs. "You love him; you hate him. You want to be near him; you want to be as far away from him as possible. You want to use me; you don't. You make no sense."
I press my palms to my eyes.
Because he's right.
I don't know what to do. Not as Yu, anyway. The real me is... confusing.
But, Yuna... She's perfect. Her life is so simple.
God, I wish I was her.
~~~
thanks for reading:)
word count: 2453