⚠smut at the end of this chapter⚠️
I need to tell him.
As i say him i am of course referring to Sebastian, there is lots of things i want to say to him but the one I'm referring to is the most recent issue dare i say most important issue.
My childhood and why i had that outburst when i heard my mother would be moving closer to me after i just got a touch of freedom.
Growing up me and my mom never had the best relationship, in a way i was a burden to her.
"You okay dyl" Sebastian says snapping me out of my trance, i was sitting on his lap and he was rubbing my back.
"Yah" I say letting out a sigh
After a few moments of me soaking up his presence silently, i speak up "Im ready to talk about it... like my mom and stuff"
his posture straightened before he quickly said "I didn't mean to force you it's okay if you don't wanna talk about it-"
I save myself time by cutting off his nervous ramblings "You didn't force me i just feel as though i want to tell you, tell somebody"
He nodded signaling for me to continue...
"So from a young age my mom made it very clear that i was a nuisance to her.
That Leigh was the only child she had actually wanted"
I stopped to take a deep breath,
"Leigh did competitive cheer her whole life and i have, well used to have an older brother who played basketball.
My mom had my siblings when she was young, she was 20 when she had my brother which means he would've been 30 today, and she was 24 when my sister was born.
She was a young mom and her and my dad were high school sweethearts fresh out of college with no money and no plan but they somehow managed to get a house and slowly build a life.
Once i was born it's like i fucked up their perfect little lives"
"Since i was little i would get what my mother called 'teachings' she would beat me while yelling at me whatever i had done wrong and i um I-i-"
I paused because my voice cracked, i suck in a sharp breath and look at Sebastian for encouragement to keep going, though i found nothing but remorse i continued.
"She wouldn't do it often, i wouldn't say i was abused or anything like that but it just hurt me that neither of my siblings got it so why did i have to?"
"At sone point those teachings stopped, when i was 10 Leigh got into a serious car accident with my dad and my brother, my brother died but she survived and had to quit cheer for an 18 year old Leigh that was basically the end of her life her brother had died and her mother and father divorced.
She stopped talking, stopped eating
And just sat in bed all day, and since my moms golden girl wasn't so golden anymore i was forced to fill the VERY big shoes that Leigh left behind"
"Leigh was short and slim, she never lost,never complained... Leigh was perfection i was short and 'fat' my mother liked to say, she had me in a tight diet and I was practicing cheer all day everyday"
" I started to develop an eating disorder, If my weight wasn't up my self value was down, my mother had taught me to hate myself...
One day my weight was very low, i was really happy with myself i was only 130, but i couldn't stop i had to get smaller be better than Leigh at all costs"
"I ended up being admitted to the hospital by my cheer coach because i hit my head and started seizing, my weight was too low for my frame and i was unable to sustain the high impact sport"
Here comes the hardest part of my story, the part I hate to mention the most.
"When I was 15 a few days before my birthday my mother had gotten mad at me because she found out that I had a boyfriend of some sorts she thought that was the reason I quit cheer when in all actuality i just was trying to get better,
I'm almost 100% certain that she had found out about him because of my sister but that's not important-"
"-This guy was a way older guy, like 23 or 24 I didn't really like him I just liked having someone that cared for me.
I lived with him for about 3 months, and it ended up being the worst three months of my life.
He would constantly hit me, punch and kick as well, and he forced me to cook all of his meals and clean up his whole house.
But worst of all one night he came home with some friends, i remember him reeking of alcohol but he started to yell at me and then the yelling progressed to hitting me till eventually we ended up in his bedroom-"
My breathing started to pick up at the memory, Sebastian started rubbing my back again "Dylan it's okay I'm right here okay?" He said in the softest tone possible.
"That night he had assaulted me, sexually i mean"
"He dragged me by my hair and forced me to do things to him, the whole time he forced me to pleasure him he was saying things like 'you're stupid lenora' 'you're a no good whore' things my mother would say to me to make me hate myself and though I cried pleaded and begged for him to stop he never did"
Sebastians whole body tensed and his breathing went rigged.
"I knew that i had to leave, but i had nowhere to go, He had confiscated my phone all my clothes and basically everything I had."
"I couldn't call my mother even if i wanted to, I ended up planning my escape and going to Penelope's house a few days later"
"After that incident I stayed with her for a few days before returning home, I told my mom what happened to me hopping that she would take mercy on me but she didn't the bullying at home had actually gotten worse."
At this point I was in full blown tears, just explaining all that I've been through is painful.
It feels like my whole body is on fire.
"She would call me a 'useless slut' and a 'dirty whore' the hatred she had for me had grown, I ended up moving in with Leigh shortly after the incident"
"After moving out with my mother i was traumatized and broken so Leigh put me in therapy, that's when I decided that I would start going by Dylan and not by lenora"
I let out a deep breath and waited for Sebastian to say anything but he didn't.
After a few more moments of silence my inner panic set in and i got up from his lap, he still didn't speak but his gaze swiftly followed my frantic frame.
"Are you disappointed? Or disgusted in me?because I will understand if you don't want to touch me anymore or anything like that, I'm so so sorry i shoul-" he cut me off
"no of course not Dyl im sorry i didn't say anything I'm just stunned" tears welled in his eyes and he stood up walking closer to me.
"Do you still struggle with eating now? Is that why you've been losing weight?" He said like he was finally connecting all the dots,
I looked down in shame and slowly nodded,
He let out a deep breath before running his hands through his hair,
His voice came out barely audible "I'm sorry that it took me so fucking long to notice what was going on.
And I'm sorry this shits happened to you I-i-" he cut his own self of by clearing his throat
"I want to help you get better And after hearing about everything that you went through, it makes me even more sure that I need to say this to you, Dylan i love you, i love you more than anything and I'm so fucking grateful that you didn't give up on life for more reasons then one but mostly for my own selfish reasons like if you had given up I would have been deprived of the chance to meet, to know, and to love you"
He loved me? After i just told him everything about myself he wasn't disappointed or disgusted but instead he loved me?
"I love you too Sebastian" and with that he wasted no time crashing his lips onto mine.
This kiss was needy, desperate almost and i let him take full control.
His hands slipped from my back to my ass as he gripped it firmly, I groaned into the kiss enjoying his hands on my body a little too much.
He picked me up and backed up towards the bed, i was now in a straddled position on his lap, I started grinding my hips slowly increasing the speed.
"Fuck" he groaned out desperately.
His hands fiddled with the hem of my shirt "baby can I take this off" his sultry voice cried out i nodded "words please" he replied to my nodding "yes" i said back.
My shirt and bra were off as I continued riding his lap, he nipped and suckled on my boobs as his hands were pressed gently into the side of my hips.
I couldn't take the riding anymore so I stood up and removed my pants, while holding the waist band of his pants I gently asked "take it off please" to which he waisted no time pulling down his pants and his boxers then allowing his hardened cock to spring free.
This time i was lying on my back while his head was kissing the sensitive skin around my thighs i moaned and groaned in despair due to the seductive nature of his actions.
I was practically itching for his lips to contact my throbbing clit.
He lined up his cock what my entrance before gently entering.
I moaned loudly, "shh, you can do it baby" he said while brushing strands of hair out of my face
He continued thrusting in and out of me while slowly picking up the speed, "fuck baby you look so beautiful" he side whilst tugging on my hair.
As he was no thrusting in and out of me at an unbearable speed i felt that familiar knot form in my stomach "I-i I'm gonna cum" i spoke up he thrusted harder and I threw my head back in content.
His movements slowed when a burst of warmth had been released into me, he'd slowly removed his body from on top of mine while slipping on him grey joggers.
I knew he was getting something to clean me up, it had slowly become a ritual or tradition of some sort.
I winced at the feeling of a cold white cloth wiping down my clit, "shit, I'm sorry love" he said while gently peppering kisses on my forehead.
We both crawled under the blankets and cuddled up to each other, i knew more then anything that Sebastian was who i wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
———•
Sad and steamy 😜
We are slowly discovering more about Dylan, also we will slowly start to incorporate more of Dylan,Leigh anddd Sebastian pov.
Do we like this idea?